Diary of a farang in Isaan

[EVENKEEL]

10 hours ago, owl sees all said:

Some of the Americans that I've spoken to since arriving in Thailand sound very convincing, and they get great military pensions. Much better than mine. A guy I spoke to last year was a 'Chief' in the US military, and he got 90k baht a month.

 

Toilets! I know where all the free toilets in Ban Dung are. I don't go into bars, and always use the same two restaurants. Not that I like the furnishings or anything like that; I simply trust the food will not do me an injustice.

 

Udon can be a challenge. I'll never go to BKK again. Well perhaps the airport.

 

 

The US military has some nice pensions, depending on years in service.

 

[owl sees all]

22 minutes ago, Will27 said:

If you like 3 in 1, try the Vietnamese brand G7.

 

They have a few types but I really enjoy the Strong x 2.

They also make a decent espresso.

 

 

Thanks for that Will. I'll look out for it in the supermarkets. Hope it's not too expensive.

 

Edited September 23, 2020 by owl sees all

[owl sees all]

12 minutes ago, EVENKEEL said:

The US military has some nice pensions, depending on years in service.

 

Yes!

 

I don't know how the US manage to pay the military; past and present. Must cost absolute billions.

[Lacessit]

1 hour ago, owl sees all said:

Yes!

 

I don't know how the US manage to pay the military; past and present. Must cost absolute billions.

Haven't you heard? The Fed just prints more dollars.

[Lacessit]

3 hours ago, Fat is a type of crazy said:

For me  the irony of Thai food is that the stuff our wives make us tastes good but, in my case, the food they eat themselves is something else.

My ex would prefer her fried salty fish that would  stink up the kitchen, cooking tiny crabs with no meat  in some black sauce, funny soups with some herbs that would make me gag. Some of it was nice but most not to my taste.

The she’d cook  a big fish for me that looks like it came from a restaurant.

 

 

For a housewarming, I bought 5 kg of good quality beef. The GF's sister cooked it up with chili.

I swear, the sauce she prepared could have done double duty as paint stripper. Her Thai family loved it, was inedible for me.

[bluesofa]

15 hours ago, owl sees all said:

Of course you are right Samsensam. When you put it the way you have, I'd be silly not to learn Thai. But I can multiply, and do other sums in Thai.

 

I'm gonna learn one new word every day from now on.

Sum must think that just doesn't add up.

[faraday]

Clouded over here about an hour ago, now thunder & lightening, with strong winds.

 

Yes, Lacey, some of the Chili sauces my wife makes are like eating molten metal!  

[bluesofa]

14 hours ago, chickenslegs said:

I've tried that.

By the time I get to day #10 I've forgotten the word I learned on day #1, and so it goes on.

But I can remember lots of words and phrases from the French classes that I hated in my childhood and have never used since.

Forgetting the word you learnt on day one.

Reminds me of Benjamin the donkey in Animal Farm. He had the same problem.

[bluesofa]

14 hours ago, FarFlungFalang said:

If I learnt Thai I wouldn't need the wife.....wait for it...nah nothing,I though something might come to mind but no.I actually learnt to read and write Thai but have very little vocab and lack of practice means little progress but it does help with learning to speak it but people around here speak Lao so again little progress. We've just had 4 blackouts in 1/2 an hour and three of them just as I'm about to hit submit after writing a post I had just finished writing this one saying we've had 3 blackouts with 2 coming as I'm about to hit submit but we just had number four.

Right now, we've got a power outage.

 

I know  I'm a sad bar steward, I keep track of them (gives me something to do). We've had 85 in seven years. This one now is number 86.

 

If it's not back within thirty minutes, I'll call the PEA. Everyone else in the village sits around for hours on end wondering when the power will come back on.

When I phone the PEA call centre on 1129, if it's a local power outage, they're not even aware of it until I tell them.

As I was writing the sentence above, the power came back on. Only 15 minutes this time.

 

[bluesofa]

22 minutes ago, faraday said:

Clouded over here about an hour ago, now thunder & lightening, with strong winds.

 

Yes, Lacey, some of the Chili sauces my wife makes are like eating molten metal!  

molten metal. Reminds me of Stan Laurel: You can take a horse to water, but a pencil must be lead.

 

Edited September 23, 2020 by bluesofa
misprit

[bluesofa]

2 hours ago, Lacessit said:

For a housewarming, I bought 5 kg of good quality beef. The GF's sister cooked it up with chili.

I swear, the sauce she prepared could have done double duty as paint stripper. Her Thai family loved it, was inedible for me.

Ha ha ha! Chilli for 'house warming'.

[bluesofa]

 

16 hours ago, Lacessit said:

I confess I have never been in any armed forces, apart from cadets in college. I guess that makes me unusual among TV posters.

Looks like there's two of us then.

 

There was a line in a comedy a few years ago:

A guy trying to impress some blokes in a pub, telling them how he'd been in the army and killed hundreds.

His wife interrupted him: "Yes, he was a cook. He poisoned them all."

[Lacessit]

3 hours ago, bluesofa said:

Right now, we've got a power outage.

 

I know  I'm a sad bar steward, I keep track of them (gives me something to do). We've had 85 in seven years. This one now is number 86.

 

If it's not back within thirty minutes, I'll call the PEA. Everyone else in the village sits around for hours on end wondering when the power will come back on.

When I phone the PEA call centre on 1129, if it's a local power outage, they're not even aware of it until I tell them.

As I was writing the sentence above, the power came back on. Only 15 minutes this time.

 

As I am OCD, I had to do the sums. On average, you get one every 30 days.

Please tell me you have some form of activity while you are waiting for the outages, apart from a recording function.

[bluesofa]

48 minutes ago, Lacessit said:

As I am OCD, I had to do the sums. On average, you get one every 30 days.

Please tell me you have some form of activity while you are waiting for the outages, apart from a recording function.

I sit and stare in to space and think.

Sometimes I just stare into space.

[Lacessit]

1 hour ago, bluesofa said:

I sit and stare in to space and think.

Sometimes I just stare into space.

I suppose that makes a kind of sense, you can't get into trouble doing nothing. I am not going to ask about what you are thinking, sorry if that disappoints you. I have enough problems with my own thoughts.

I stare into space when I am on the golf course, and wonder if I can conquer it.

[faraday]

3 hours ago, bluesofa said:

I sit and stare in to space and think.

Sometimes I just stare into space.

Reminds of some toilet graffiti from long ago:

 

" Some come here to sit & think

  Some here to s**t & stink

  But I come here to scratch my balls

  And read the writing on the walls"

 

Very profound.

 

 

[bluesofa]

24 minutes ago, faraday said:

Reminds of some toilet graffiti from long ago:

 

" Some come here to sit & think

  Some here to s**t & stink

  But I come here to scratch my balls

  And read the writing on the walls"

 

Very profound.

Non-toilet graffiti.

I remember a sign which said 'Harwich for the continent', underneath which someone had written: 'and Frinton for the incontinent'.

[owl sees all]

Owl Log - 23-09-2020 - Wednesday evening.

 

A bit peeved this evening. Went to the 20 baht shop to buy some bits and pieces and I thought I'd get a Government Lottery ticket from the lady next to the shop. I spotted a ticket that I thought was sure to win and pointed it out to the lady. It was one of those double ones. The other ticket had been sold; so just one left. She asked for 100 baht. I told her that Chan-o-cha said 80 baht. She wouldn't budge. 100 baht is was. If it hadn't have been such a fantastic number, I'd have walked away on principle. But, I could do with six million baht right now.

 

While in the 20 baht shop I got the glue I was after; to make floats for the week end's fishing with Mildred.

 

 

Also a pack of pens. M is always giving her pens to classmates at school, so I thought they could be a wise purchase. Less than two baht each. Can't argue with that. On the reverse side there was some info about the pens.

 

 

Good to see such concern over safety.

 

ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ

 

Just as I thought, the school plaque was unveiled.

 

 

One thing had me baffled though. Why did the tradesman start with the middle letters?

 

 

What does it say?

 

 

Something is not quite the same. I'll have to ask some searching questions.

 

 

ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ

 

That road leading into Ban Dung on the 2022, is a disgrace. The section before the 2 kilometre new section is a four-lane road. Although a visitor wouldn't know it, as the two outside lanes are unusable for about 3000km. Just too dangerous.

 

 

ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ

 

The subject of roads in our area is never too far away. The 'super-highway' next to our farm has been well and truly fixed.

 

 

And the smaller hole.

 

 

Watch this space for more road repairs soon!

 

ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ

 

The wires in Ban Dung have been gathered up and,,,,,, dumped!

 

It's been a week now and no-one has taken responsibility for a clear up.

 

 

The view from t'other side of the road.

 

 

ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ

 

The four plants that have been grown from seed; well three from seed and the two eucas from cuttings, are doing very well.

 

Mango on the left. Two avocados (or avocadoes) in the middle and eucas to the right.

 

 

It's time for the eucas to get planted somewhere out in the field. The others will be OK for a while yet in their bags.

 

ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ

 

I upset Mrs owl this morning. She was looking into the mirror preening herself, and a made a touching and complimentary comment as I passed. Lost in translation. I simply must learn to speak Thai; or Lao. There will be no harmony until I do.

 

No need for masks now in the 7-11 that I go in. Still have distancing however. My favourite check-out girl has not been seen for weeks. Anyway; I've moved on.

 

Sold the last two water tanks. One had a little split so let them go cheap; 3500 baht for the pair. No money has changed hands for now. Might get paid in rice later.

 

A shower this morning. Not for long, but OK.

 

The goal tally for the English PL last week end was 44. I'm still searching the archives but I'm sure it's a record.

 

Fish look well.

 

Bye y'all.

 

Edited September 23, 2020 by owl sees all

[owl sees all]

1 hour ago, faraday said:

Reminds of some toilet graffiti from long ago:

 

" Some come here to sit & think

  Some here to s**t & stink

  But I come here to scratch my balls

  And read the writing on the walls"

 

Very profound.

 

 

And just as you are finished writing the ditty, you drop the pen and it rolls under the door. 

 

Knowing looks when you venture out.

Edited September 23, 2020 by owl sees all

[bannork]

 อาคาร  the first word means building วิทยาบริการ  means academic resources, so there you have it, a majestic title indeed 

Academic Resources Building.

[Lacessit]

My GF gets me buying totally illogical numbers in the lottery, last one was 000. Before that was 555, not sure if the urine was not being extracted with that one. Perhaps I should be grateful she won't bankrupt me with her gambling habit.

Some frustration getting lottery tickets in Australia, Lotto prize on Saturday was ( drumroll ) north of 1,200 million baht, on current exchange rates. Just think, I could buy a bigger condo. Or a whole one, if I wanted to turn a large fortune into a small one.

Last week, I registered online, supplied all my details, and bought a ticket. Nothing happened, so I phone the help desk. Working my way through the Irish brogue coming down the line, I eventually learned I can't buy an Australian lottery ticket unless I am in Australia. <deleted>. I'd ask my son to buy them, but he's in Stage 4 lockdown and the nearest Lotto shop is 7 km away. He's only allowed to move 5 km from home. Any more, and the plod fines you over 30,000 baht in the local currency. <deleted> again.

Time for some zzzz's, those fish will probably give me nightmares, Owl. They look like piranhas to me.

 

Edit. <deleted> first letter b, last letter r. Six letters. Uttered in a famous Toyota ad set in unzed.

 

Edited September 23, 2020 by Lacessit

[FarFlungFalang]

9 hours ago, bannork said:

 อาคาร  the first word means building วิทยาบริการ  means academic resources, so there you have it, a majestic title indeed 

Academic Resources Building.

Are you sure it's not "Building Academic Resources"?

[owl sees all]

9 hours ago, Lacessit said:

My GF gets me buying totally illogical numbers in the lottery, last one was 000. Before that was 555, not sure if the urine was not being extracted with that one. Perhaps I should be grateful she won't bankrupt me with her gambling habit.

 

<snip>

 

555. Yes 555!

 

It's gonna come up on the Thai lottery soon. Mildred says so.

 

Never mind throwing nails into a stream. Never mind rubbing powder onto trees. Never mind touching tortoises where you wouldn't touch you girl friend. Here is the proof.

 

Pics never lie.

 

 

More certain than Leicester winning the EPL for this season.

 

You saw it here first guys.

[Lacessit]

1 hour ago, owl sees all said:

555. Yes 555!

 

It's gonna come up on the Thai lottery soon. Mildred says so.

 

Never mind throwing nails into a stream. Never mind rubbing powder onto trees. Never mind touching tortoises where you wouldn't touch you girl friend. Here is the proof.

 

Pics never lie.

 

 

More certain than Leicester winning the EPL for this season.

 

You saw it here first guys.

Eh? I see that once every day. Leicester? Is that pronounced Lester, like you guys pronounce Featherstonehaugh and Cholmondoley?

[faraday]

And Worcester....

[faraday]

Still, sometimes when I'm out, people call me bashtard. It doesn't sound like my name.

Dunno why.

 

 

Edited September 24, 2020 by faraday
spellin'

[bannork]

4 hours ago, FarFlungFalang said:

Are you sure it's not "Building Academic Resources"?

  Sure.  อาคาร means building, you usually see it on every large school building and numbered, i.e. อาคาร 1 perhaps classrooms for lower primary school, grades 1-3, อาคาร 2 classrooms for upper primary students, etc.  The numbers are usually in Thai.

[bluesofa]

2 hours ago, faraday said:

Still, sometimes when I'm out, people call me bashtard. It doesn't sound like my name.

Dunno why.

I notice they have a lisp too.

[bluesofa]

2 hours ago, Lacessit said:

Eh? I see that once every day. Leicester? Is that pronounced Lester, like you guys pronounce Featherstonehaugh and Cholmondoley?

We do it just do make it difficult for Americans. When they get the hang of it, we'll change the pronunciation again.

 

I went to see Blondie (Debbie Harry) in concert at the DeMontfort Halls in Leicester in the seventies.

When she said to the audience, "It's really good to be here in Lei-ces-ter," there was a lot of booing from the auditorium.

 

[bluesofa]

1 hour ago, bannork said:

6 hours ago, FarFlungFalang said:

Are you sure it's not "Building Academic Resources"?

  Sure.  อาคาร means building, you usually see it on every large school building and numbered, i.e. อาคาร 1 perhaps classrooms for lower primary school, grades 1-3, อาคาร 2 classrooms for upper primary students, etc.  The numbers are usually in Thai.

Agreed. อาคาร is the noun for 'building', not a verb.