"Conversations" on Tinder

[1FinickyOne]

28 minutes ago, scubascuba3 said:

unless they want to improve their English in which case it's a waste of time for the guy

I think some of the posters here could find some use in that too...

[1FinickyOne]

1 hour ago, Airalee said:

Of course, that makes you wonder what they gab about for 5 minutes with whatever Thai person (even complete strangers) whom they may interact with on a daily basis.

Lottery numbers.. I had 98 and it came out 89 and I forgot to reverse it... etc.. it is very exciting. 

[1FinickyOne]

45 minutes ago, Nick in Thailand said:

How does one find a meaningful relationship amongst these

I met my wife through an introduction... we both had lots of trust in the fellow who introduced us... 

 

Do you speak any Thai? This really opens up a much larger field - and I think puts many at ease...

 

good luck with the one you have found na krubp..

[Airalee]

20 minutes ago, 1FinickyOne said:

Ok. My experience is in person and I find Thai open up very quickly when you show an interest in what they are interested in, which to a great extent is family... I have never been on a dating cite... perhaps if the OP just asked - How Much? He might get more enthusiastic responses... 

The women on the game on these sites are pretty easily recognized.  They’re the ones with either the “sexy” pictures or with multiple photos of themselves drinking wine in an expensive restaurant (usually a picture taken by a previous date).  If it was a true social situation with friends, those friends would be in the picture too...generally speaking.

 

Most of the good women have pretty tough lives and are working long hours and don’t have much in the way of hobbies/interests because post university, they just don’t have much time.  Also, many of them have progressed much further in life than their respective families (and certainly like to portray as such in their Facebook/Instagram/dating profile photos) and are a little uncomfortable letting you know how hard life was back in the village and that their parents are quite poor and she sends money back to help out the family that wasn’t as fortunate as she was.  It’s not like she’s going to say that her Dad really enjoys playing chess and Mom is on the PTA and helps out with church bake sales.

 

YMMV

[Airalee]

3 minutes ago, 1FinickyOne said:

 

I met my wife through an introduction... we both had lots of trust in the fellow who introduced us... 

 

Do you speak any Thai? This really opens up a much larger field - and I think puts many at ease...

 

good luck with the one you have found na krubp..

Introductions are pretty hit or miss.  Many Thais don’t like to introduce you to other people because if it doesn’t work out, it can be an uncomfortable situation.  They will also need to know you very well in order to introduce you (to someone worth meeting in the first place) and if you’re not squeaky clean...no way.

 

With regards to speaking Thai.  That too is a mixed bag.  Some like that you have enough respect for their culture/country to learn the language....others will turn tail and run due to the “Farang roo mak” issue.

[Nick in Thailand]

1 hour ago, Airalee said:

The women on the game on these sites are pretty easily recognized.  They’re the ones with either the “sexy” pictures or with multiple photos of themselves drinking wine in an expensive restaurant (usually a picture taken by a previous date).  If it was a true social situation with friends, those friends would be in the picture too...generally speaking.

I'm looking for a conservative girl. Any photos with alcohol, tattoos, bikinis, or the accentuation of the posterior / busom, are an instant rejection from me. 

[CharlieH]

3 hours ago, Nick in Thailand said:

I'm looking for a conservative girl. Any photos with alcohol, tattoos, bikinis, or the accentuation of the posterior / busom, are an instant rejection from me. 

Why the downer on tattoos? Preconceived labelling or just dont like them ?

[faraday]

12 minutes ago, CharlieH said:

Why the downer on tattoos? Preconceived labelling or just dont like them ?

 Have tattoo Charrie?

[CharlieH]

13 minutes ago, faraday said:

 Have tattoo Charrie?

You asking or telling Falladay ?

[OneMoreFarang]

6 hours ago, Airalee said:

you will then get lots of cute “stickers”

Those stickers! I never know how to interpret half of them. Does that sticker mean yes or no or like or what?

But then again I guess that is the point. Anybody can interpret it just like they want and nobody ever said yes or no or any other clear answer...

[OneMoreFarang]

5 hours ago, scubascuba3 said:

If you aren't looking for a sex worker try thaicupid instead

That's funny. The girl on the cover page of Thai Cupid worked in Nana a long time ago (when she was young and pretty). 

[OneMoreFarang]

46 minutes ago, CharlieH said:

3 hours ago, Nick in Thailand said:

I'm looking for a conservative girl. Any photos with alcohol, tattoos, bikinis, or the accentuation of the posterior / busom, are an instant rejection from me. 

Why the downer on tattoos? Preconceived labelling or just dont like them ?

Do conservative girls have tattoos?

Some tattoos are the typical Thai "temple" tattoos. I think they are harmless and don't tell much about lifestyle.

 

And then there are the typical hooker tattoos which often indicate years of entertainment activity. Not too conservative ...

 

[CharlieH]

2 minutes ago, OneMoreFarang said:

Do conservative girls have tattoos?

Some tattoos are the typical Thai "temple" tattoos. I think they are harmless and don't tell much about lifestyle.

 

And then there are the typical hooker tattoos which often indicate years of entertainment activity. Not too conservative ...

 

Then there are the bored village girls, never been near a bar or drink, just got with the wrong crowd and were stupid !

[Nick in Thailand]

3 minutes ago, OneMoreFarang said:

Do conservative girls have tattoos?

Some tattoos are the typical Thai "temple" tattoos. I think they are harmless and don't tell much about lifestyle.

 

And then there are the typical hooker tattoos which often indicate years of entertainment activity. Not too conservative ...

 

Fair point. 

[Nick in Thailand]

59 minutes ago, CharlieH said:

Why the downer on tattoos? Preconceived labelling or just dont like them ?

Preconceived labelling. Often, but not always, the mark of a bar girl. 

[Airalee]

43 minutes ago, OneMoreFarang said:

Those stickers! I never know how to interpret half of them. Does that sticker mean yes or no or like or what?

But then again I guess that is the point. Anybody can interpret it just like they want and nobody ever said yes or no or any other clear answer...

You just need to up your sticker-foo and beat them at their own game....

 

[OneMoreFarang]

4 hours ago, CharlieH said:

Then there are the bored village girls, never been near a bar or drink, just got with the wrong crowd and were stupid !

Sure, that happens. But it seem some of them become serial offenders and at least for my taste too many ugly tattoos is too much.

[BritManToo]

14 hours ago, Airalee said:

If they had such a deep meaningful relationship with their significant other, surely they wouldn’t be posting on Thaivisa with thousands (sometimes tens of thousands) of posts to their name.

Retirement is quite a large chunk of time to fill, especially when you're no longer all that physically able any more.

[aviator581]

Most contacts on Tinder are fake, I even think tinder will engage you to keep you paying. 

[kaneko86]

23 hours ago, Nick in Thailand said:

Oh dear. Well, I have found one absolute treasure, in my eyes. She dresses conservatively, she is a nurse bit she has an unorthodox beauty to her. 

 

I'm on question 10 now, she has only asked "what job you do?" I'm a teacher but I also run a small fintech business from home (Australia) , so I don't think my profession is off-putting. 

 

I don't want to give this one up. I'm so, so picky. I have about 200 girls I don't like back on Tinder. 

 

Come on dude! What are you losing time for? Thing about a nice place to go near home and ask her to go there with you!

[malibukid]

On 4/18/2021 at 3:16 PM, 1FinickyOne said:

The question can be - tell me about yourself, what do you enjoy doing? ask about their family... things that might be important to them - you can learn a lot that way

 

Say thing that will get them talking... 

i always ask them to explain the ACTH axis on the limbic system

[malibukid]

22 hours ago, Nick in Thailand said:

I'm looking for a conservative girl. Any photos with alcohol, tattoos, bikinis, or the accentuation of the posterior / busom, are an instant rejection from me. 

one you can take home to mother

[SbuxPlease]

The language definitely reduces topics to the lowest common denominator. I think it's true that a lot of people live fairly mundane, routine lives and don't have much to say. I think many of the farang hunters have _heard_ that white guys should be pursued (probably her auntie), but have no idea how, or how to be interesting for them.

 

Consider that individualism and self improvement aren't as major factors in Thai culture as the west, and you can see why they aren't rushing to stand out and explain why they are interesting, doing something cool, or trying to determine whether you are either. Many are also very shy to speak English as they don't have a lot of experience with it in a conversational sense. So they feel nervous about taking risks and trying vocab they don't understand very well. So in a way, they don't want to be embarrassed.

 

Also consider that priority number one in a Thai marital relationship is probably supporting each-other in a very traditional sense (man brings the bacon, woman cooks it), and not based on the western version of "If we love each other then nothing else matters" philosophy.

 

On Tinder, I think you can find the interesting ones by asking interesting questions right away, and don't accept anything less. Like literally, the opening line: "Hey, what's something you wish smart guys would ask you that they never do?" or something. If you get any variation of "I don't know, and u" then unmatch and move on with your life!

 

There are a lot of amazing Thai women who've studied, educated themselves, and developed rich personalities and can be emotionally/intellectually/physically very engaging. But not every farang wants that style of woman either, eh?

 

 

 

 

[crazykopite]

Tinder to me is total BS I just came off it all they want to do is squeeze the most amount of money out of you  I didn’t bother with global just Thai ladies put within 20 Kms and you get girls from 600 kms ive come to the conclusion get to know a good massage girl who will visit you once a week to keep your hormones at an acceptable level and if you cook a good breakfast you might get decent discount . Thai Flirting and Thai Cupid are as bad the other day I had a like she wrote Hi sugar daddy today I’m very horny , just saying sugar daddy left me no option but to send her to the nope bin .

[Stevemercer]

 

On 4/18/2021 at 4:02 PM, Airalee said:

 

 

Those who might try to chastise you here on TVF and regale you with stories of their educated Thai wives are just lashing out because...that’s what they do.  If they had such a deep meaningful relationship with their significant other, surely they wouldn’t be posting on Thaivisa with thousands (sometimes tens of thousands) of posts to their name.

 

Unfortunately there is a kernel of truth here. Someone happy with something wouldn't bother to subscribe or read critical posts about that very thing. Unless, of course, they are a show-off, take joy in the misfortune of others or are deluded.

 

So hat does it say abut us posters who do read this sort of thing and contribute to the discussion. Are we still searching for that true happiness?

 

It's a lose - lose proposition for everyone!

[1FinickyOne]

52 minutes ago, malibukid said:

i always ask them to explain the ACTH axis on the limbic system

sure, a 'must' question, but I usually save it for the 2nd date...

[Airalee]

51 minutes ago, Stevemercer said:

 

 

Unfortunately there is a kernel of truth here. Someone happy with something wouldn't bother to subscribe or read critical posts about that very thing. Unless, of course, they are a show-off, take joy in the misfortune of others or are deluded.

 

So hat does it say abut us posters who do read this sort of thing and contribute to the discussion. Are we still searching for that true happiness?

 

It's a lose - lose proposition for everyone!

The most important thing for those of us “still searching for that true happiness” to take away from these conversations is to understand that even though we might poke fun at the cultural differences, that it is not to be taken in a malicious manner, it doesn’t mean all Thai women are bad/stupid/whatever and that because of these cultural differences, we (the foreigners) must understand that sometimes, compromises need to be made.  Unfortunately, those compromises are usually a one sided deal.

[Thingamabob]

On 4/18/2021 at 4:01 PM, Nick in Thailand said:

IDK, the women are beautiful but robotic, and they, and the rest of society, lack empathy imo. 

 

I was hoping I was going to get something more real here. 

 

Perhaps I should just accept my fate and marry a masculine, overweight feminist in Australia. 

Good idea. You are clearly going to find life in Thailand difficult.

[OneMoreFarang]

2 hours ago, SbuxPlease said:

There are a lot of amazing Thai women who've studied, educated themselves, and developed rich personalities and can be emotionally/intellectually/physically very engaging. But not every farang wants that style of woman either, eh?

Personally I concentrate on the basics: cute, fun, honest. Intelligence, education, and and and are possible and welcome extras. But what's the point in dating a women like you describe if she doesn't look good and make you horny?

[OneMoreFarang]

1 hour ago, Airalee said:

, it doesn’t mean all Thai women are bad/stupid/whatever and that because of these cultural differences, we (the foreigners) must understand that sometimes, compromises need to be made.  Unfortunately, those compromises are usually a one sided deal.

Don't you think it is already a big compromise for a Thai woman to spend time with a farang? We are in many ways different to Thais. And what we think is normal is for many Thai people absolutely not normal.

Sometimes we are attracted to easy other. But there are lots of compromises right from the beginning.