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Positives and Negatives of Thailand (from Western perspective)


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26 minutes ago, mokwit said:

The visa situation became stricter under Thaksin and again under this lot.

IMO the visa situation was a result of local headmen in immigration making up their own rules. I say that because they were not on any official website. The Chiang Mai office used to add their own made up rules in handwriting on the typed official document.

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On 10/3/2021 at 12:22 PM, SEAsia Traveler said:

I’m leaving Thailand after nearly a year in Phuket as a trial retirement.

Best of luck, your positives and negatives sum it up, that said, there is no place perfect as far as I am aware of, however, let us know when you find it, suffice to say, I have, it's up top.

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18 minutes ago, thaibeachlovers said:

IMO the visa situation was a result of local headmen in immigration making up their own rules. I say that because they were not on any official website. The Chiang Mai office used to add their own made up rules in handwriting on the typed official document.

Yes and no. Yes local offices interpret things their way, but without doubt under Thaksin the tightening up started and again under Prawit who apparently manouvred Big Joke into position. I think some of it comes from Immigration themselves - It started when Thaksin ahd a brain fart called the Elite visa and nobody bought it so I suspect they tried topush people onto it by closing off alternatives.

 

Between working here with WP and becoming eligible for retirement visa EVERY way I stayed here in the 11 years in between has been closed off. No more Houston visas from Lars and Vinnie, then no Non B/O from Birmingham, then no going across the border and back every month for 2 years like I did, then no back to back tourist visas - see the pattern? You would have to have been on a retirement or marriage visa for 20 years or on overstay for 20 years not to have seen this.

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24 minutes ago, thaibeachlovers said:

IMO the visa situation was a result of local headmen in immigration making up their own rules. I say that because they were not on any official website. The Chiang Mai office used to add their own made up rules in handwriting on the typed official document.

That's known to be very common throughout the regional offices. Each locale make up their own regulations as they go, even when contradicting any such national policy. 

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15 hours ago, mokwit said:

Yes and no. Yes local offices interpret things their way, but without doubt under Thaksin the tightening up started and again under Prawit who apparently manouvred Big Joke into position. I think some of it comes from Immigration themselves - It started when Thaksin ahd a brain fart called the Elite visa and nobody bought it so I suspect they tried topush people onto it by closing off alternatives.

 

Between working here with WP and becoming eligible for retirement visa EVERY way I stayed here in the 11 years in between has been closed off. No more Houston visas from Lars and Vinnie, then no Non B/O from Birmingham, then no going across the border and back every month for 2 years like I did, then no back to back tourist visas - see the pattern? You would have to have been on a retirement or marriage visa for 20 years or on overstay for 20 years not to have seen this.

Given I used to be able to stay on 90 day visa exempt with a ( visa free ) visit to Malaya 4 times a year of course I have seen it, but the requirements as set out on the official information were not onerous, and certainly easier than for a Thai woman to visit many western countries.

What made the process exasperating for me were the stupidities the local offices introduced on their own initiative.

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On 10/5/2021 at 2:51 PM, thaibeachlovers said:

I made the mistake once of telling a female friend that my wife to be would take my shoes off for me

Are you sure it was your wife-to-be was the one who your friend was disturbed by, and not a sudden loss of respect for you as a person?

 

Honestly what kind of man can't take off his own shoes?

 

Some of the stories I hear from girls about the things they have to do for their partners is unbelievable, honestly. One girl had a partner who couldn't choose what to wear and had her pick for him and lay them out on the bed for him while he was showering (at least he managed to shower himself, I suppose!)

 

There's a big subset of men who appear to want more of a mother figure than a girlfriend (and in Thailand it tends to be a mother figure who's also half their age!), and telling somebody that your girlfriend takes your shoes off for you is more than likely to put you in that category in the eyes of the person you tell.

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11 hours ago, JayClay said:

Are you sure it was your wife-to-be was the one who your friend was disturbed by, and not a sudden loss of respect for you as a person?

 

Honestly what kind of man can't take off his own shoes?

 

Some of the stories I hear from girls about the things they have to do for their partners is unbelievable, honestly. One girl had a partner who couldn't choose what to wear and had her pick for him and lay them out on the bed for him while he was showering (at least he managed to shower himself, I suppose!)

 

There's a big subset of men who appear to want more of a mother figure than a girlfriend (and in Thailand it tends to be a mother figure who's also half their age!), and telling somebody that your girlfriend takes your shoes off for you is more than likely to put you in that category in the eyes of the person you tell.

You write as though you know nothing about Thai culture as it used to be a while back ( it's changing  ), and impart western cultural values to Thailand, which is just wrong in so many ways.

If you don't know what you are talking about, should you be commenting on a personal level on here?

 

As for the category that in your opinion I belong to it's certainly no worse than the category I'm putting you in.

 

Bye.

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On 10/7/2021 at 6:58 AM, JayClay said:

One girl had a partner who couldn't choose what to wear and had her pick for him and lay them out on the bed for him while he was showering (at least he managed to shower himself, I suppose!)

How do you know he wasn't perfectly capable but got her to do it because she enjoyed feeling needed?

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I think there are more positives than negatives.

 

I like that Thailand:

 

is relatively non-judgmental, liberal, and open-minded

doesn't subscribe top politically correct BS

has pretty good weather mostly

has plentiful and diverse things to enjoy

is full of novelty

is modern and advanced in most ways

is safe and relatively clean

has a fairly decent immigration system

has mostly non-confrontational people

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On 10/7/2021 at 12:58 AM, JayClay said:

Are you sure it was your wife-to-be was the one who your friend was disturbed by, and not a sudden loss of respect for you as a person?

 

Honestly what kind of man can't take off his own shoes?

 

Some of the stories I hear from girls about the things they have to do for their partners is unbelievable, honestly. One girl had a partner who couldn't choose what to wear and had her pick for him and lay them out on the bed for him while he was showering (at least he managed to shower himself, I suppose!)

 

There's a big subset of men who appear to want more of a mother figure than a girlfriend (and in Thailand it tends to be a mother figure who's also half their age!), and telling somebody that your girlfriend takes your shoes off for you is more than likely to put you in that category in the eyes of the person you tell.

Oh dear. You won't like this

 

My wife gives me a manicure and pedicure every other week, showers me everyday (a brutal scrubbing of every inch.....no I don't smell, not now anyway!!), cuts my hair once every three weeks.

 

She does all the shopping, cooks, cleans, does the laundry and ironing.

 

It would have been easier to say she does virtually everything......on top of that she never stops telling me she loves me and I am a sexy man.

 

She has now built a 3 bed house for us both (all her money) and we are waiting for completion around Christmas.

 

Not too shabby all told.

 

I take my own shoes off (flip flops)

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45 minutes ago, Will B Good said:

Oh dear. You won't like this

 

My wife gives me a manicure and pedicure every other week, showers me everyday (a brutal scrubbing of every inch.....no I don't smell, not now anyway!!), cuts my hair once every three weeks.

 

She does all the shopping, cooks, cleans, does the laundry and ironing.

 

It would have been easier to say she does virtually everything......on top of that she never stops telling me she loves me and I am a sexy man.

 

She has now built a 3 bed house for us both (all her money) and we are waiting for completion around Christmas.

 

Not too shabby all told.

 

I take my own shoes off (flip flops)

I was similar till she decided I was yesterday's news. I had to pay her 20 baht for the haircut as she claimed it was something to do with "Thai culture".

 

Unfortunately she was the untidiest person I ever lived with, and I did the housework.

 

As for ironing, never do that for myself, as in my clothes are never ironed. Don't wear anything that needs ironing.

I let her do the laundry as she insisted on hand washing it before putting in the machine.

Given she was a chef I was happy to let her do the cooking.

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On 10/10/2021 at 3:09 PM, thaibeachlovers said:

and for the sake of balance you asked him as well, or did you just believe her? In my experience they'll say anything, whether true or not, to suck up to another potential customer.

I couldn't ask him because he wasn't in the country at the time. But it seems a pretty tame thing to make up and don't really see how it could lead to extracting money from me. I was certainly not a potential customer and she was well aware of that.

 

On 10/10/2021 at 2:24 PM, Will B Good said:

Oh dear. You won't like this

 

My wife gives me a manicure and pedicure every other week, showers me everyday (a brutal scrubbing of every inch.....no I don't smell, not now anyway!!), cuts my hair once every three weeks.

 

She does all the shopping, cooks, cleans, does the laundry and ironing.

 

It would have been easier to say she does virtually everything......on top of that she never stops telling me she loves me and I am a sexy man.

 

She has now built a 3 bed house for us both (all her money) and we are waiting for completion around Christmas.

Horses for courses. I know many men like to have a woman wash them. I personally prefer to take care of my own personal hygiene and am capable of "not smell"ing without the intervention of others.

 

She does all the chores and is also the financial provider? If so then good for you... I guess? So does she work all day and still perform all those tasks, or does she just have a lot of money and you're both retired? Everybody's situation is different. I hate doing housework but in my last big relationship my girlfriend's workload increased to ridiculous levels so I would never have dreamed of asking her to do anything in those days, it was a mixture of doing it myself and hiring a cleaner to help out.

 

I've since had a couple of 'flings' where the girl was much more active in the housework department when they came to visit, but that's because I was the one working the more hours in the relationship (greater than 0, anwyway :D).

 

They still didn't take my shoes off and I wouldn't have let them. One joked that she was going to kiss my feet because that was a way for me to make me like her more. She didn't actually go through with it, obviously.

 

(edit: this text in bold makes my statement look very aggressive, doesn't it? That was not my intention. I didn't choose to make it bold and there appears to be nothing I can do to unbold it!)

Edited by JayClay
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On 10/10/2021 at 2:24 PM, Will B Good said:

Oh dear. You won't like this

 

My wife gives me a manicure and pedicure every other week, showers me everyday (a brutal scrubbing of every inch.....no I don't smell, not now anyway!!), cuts my hair once every three weeks.

 

She does all the shopping, cooks, cleans, does the laundry and ironing.

 

It would have been easier to say she does virtually everything......on top of that she never stops telling me she loves me and I am a sexy man.

 

She has now built a 3 bed house for us both (all her money) and we are waiting for completion around Christmas.

 

Not too shabby all told.

 

I take my own shoes off (flip flops)

I have some bad news for you ...............we are married to the same woman !????

(Accept for the showering and money part).

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1 hour ago, JayClay said:

I couldn't ask him because he wasn't in the country at the time. But it seems a pretty tame thing to make up and don't really see how it could lead to extracting money from me. I was certainly not a potential customer and she was well aware of that.

 

Horses for courses. I know many men like to have a woman wash them. I personally prefer to take care of my own personal hygiene and am capable of "not smell"ing without the intervention of others.

 

She does all the chores and is also the financial provider? If so then good for you... I guess? So does she work all day and still perform all those tasks, or does she just have a lot of money and you're both retired? Everybody's situation is different. I hate doing housework but in my last big relationship my girlfriend's workload increased to ridiculous levels so I would never have dreamed of asking her to do anything in those days, it was a mixture of doing it myself and hiring a cleaner to help out.

 

I've since had a couple of 'flings' where the girl was much more active in the housework department when they came to visit, but that's because I was the one working the more hours in the relationship (greater than 0, anwyway :D).

 

They still didn't take my shoes off and I wouldn't have let them. One joked that she was going to kiss my feet because that was a way for me to make me like her more. She didn't actually go through with it, obviously.

 

(edit: this text in bold makes my statement look very aggressive, doesn't it? That was not my intention. I didn't choose to make it bold and there appears to be nothing I can do to unbold it!)

You just don't get it. I was quite capable of taking my own shoes off, but I allowed her to do it because it made her feel good to do so. Just like the bargirls used to pray to Buddha to give thanks for a customer, it used to be part of the package.

Times change and perhaps they don't anymore, but it isn't, and wasn't, a big deal.

By fixating on it you make it out to be more than it was.

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27 minutes ago, thaibeachlovers said:

You just don't get it. I was quite capable of taking my own shoes off, but I allowed her to do it because it made her feel good to do so. Just like the bargirls used to pray to Buddha to give thanks for a customer, it used to be part of the package.

Times change and perhaps they don't anymore, but it isn't, and wasn't, a big deal.

By fixating on it you make it out to be more than it was.

Posters that have never lived in Thailand just can't understand what goes on.

He's probably never had a woman in his bed, let alone a Thai one try wash or dress him.

Men from the west think women are to be worshipped.

Edited by BritManToo
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1 hour ago, thaibeachlovers said:

You just don't get it. I was quite capable of taking my own shoes off, but I allowed her to do it because it made her feel good to do so. Just like the bargirls used to pray to Buddha to give thanks for a customer, it used to be part of the package.

Times change and perhaps they don't anymore, but it isn't, and wasn't, a big deal.

By fixating on it you make it out to be more than it was.

 

Actually the comment was originally in response to how horrified your western girl friend apparently was when you told her, and I was just trying to point out why she may have reacted the way she did. Maybe you were trying to provoke a response from her, anyway. It seems an odd thing to be telling her, or anybody else, anyway.

 

This whole conversation has become rather silly now anyway.

 

43 minutes ago, BritManToo said:

Posters that have never lived in Thailand just can't understand what goes on.

He's probably never had a woman in his bed, let alone a Thai one try wash or dress him.

Men from the west think women are to be worshipped.

Wow... there's a lot of assumptions in that post right there. And a zero percent hit rate; well done!

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7 minutes ago, JayClay said:

Actually the comment was originally in response to how horrified your western girl friend apparently was when you told her, and I was just trying to point out why she may have reacted the way she did. Maybe you were trying to provoke a response from her, anyway. It seems an odd thing to be telling her, or anybody else, anyway.

 

 

She reacted the way she did because she is woke. I hadn't realised that before.

I wasn't trying anything beyond telling her about a different culture, and I learned very quickly not to discuss Thailand with women back home.

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7 hours ago, JayClay said:

She does all the chores and is also the financial provider? If so then good for you... I guess? So does she work all day and still perform all those tasks, or does she just have a lot of money and you're both retired?

Both retired 65/38. She worked for 14 years in Germany and has saved all her money as we lived free courtesy of the British tax payer.

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6 hours ago, thaibeachlovers said:

She reacted the way she did because she is woke. I hadn't realised that before.

I wasn't trying anything beyond telling her about a different culture, and I learned very quickly not to discuss Thailand with women back home.

Reflective of the general dispositions of Western cultures - disconnected and intolerant....

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