You are the prize! She is not. It's about you, not her. Change your attitude!

[DudleySquat]

12 hours ago, thaibeachlovers said:

Either she is just playing along or she doesn't understand "our way" which IMO is not good ( being polite ).

 

Is only a binary solution for you?  My, how you have limited yourself. 

 

12 hours ago, thaibeachlovers said:

"Our way" IMO, has polluted the entire planet, runs on greed, and makes wars for profit. No one I know is happy in "our way".

 

Climate change nonsense.  Keep it to yourself.

[DudleySquat]

5 hours ago, BigStar said:

accept your fate with grace and equanimity.

 

Big words for most of the anklebiters.

[MangoKorat]

13 hours ago, thaibeachlovers said:

LOL. What does "better prospects" mean? A woman that demands a more expensive restaurant dinner before doing the hokey tokey than one that's happy with a Big Mac, perhaps? Are they not all the same with the lights out?

If you speak Thai, then you should know exactly what I mean. Some Thai girls are way too scared to even attempt to speak to a foreigner - that face thing where they seem to think they will be considered a lesser being if the pronounce something wrong.

 

11 hours ago, BritManToo said:

Too much time and effort .................

I prefer to pay, and there's so many to pick and choose from.

I've never had much time for 'good women', what are they 'good' for?

Both you and beachlovers are relating this to pay for play.  Whereas I would never condemn that as long as neither party is being duped - that wasn't the point of my reply to Nick Carter's post.  He was more or less saying that older Western males cannot have a relationship with a younger Thai female unless they are paying for it.

 

I know that to be incorrect. A lot depends on the people you mix with and where you go to meet people. You two aren't looking for a 'relationship' - you're just 'playing the game' and at least one of you seems to be very bitter.  Having had 2 marriages with Thai females that were 'in it to win it' and quickly sent packing once their true intentions became clear, I should also be bitter but I'm not.  I have a lot of good Thai friends and probably mix in different circles than either of you. 

 

That is not me trying to appear any better - its just that through being involved in Thai society and mixing with far more Thai's than foreigners, I know very well that decent Thai females do exist. I also know that many of those females are not against a relationship with an older foreign man - once you break down the barriers.  And there are barriers - not least of which is the way they are often viewed by other Thai's if they're seen out with an older foreigner.

[BritManToo]

15 minutes ago, MangoKorat said:

He was more or less saying that older Western males cannot have a relationship with a younger Thai female unless they are paying for it.

I'm not sure any man can have a relationship with any female without paying for it. The only difference is her payment plan.

[MangoKorat]

1 minute ago, BritManToo said:

I'm not sure any man can have a relationship with any female without paying for it. The only difference is her payment plan.

A Thai friend of mine was ripped off by her Turkish boyfriend over a period of years.  Always some reason why he had no money for his flight tickets etc. etc. She's in a very good job and obviously has a good salary - she even sponsored his Thai university course during which he moved in with her.

 

Both myself and other friends tried to tell her that he was lying to her but she didn't want to believe it.  When the truth came out, including the fact that he'd also been screwing other girls, including some in her apartment block, she was absolutely devastated and remains emotionally damaged. Afterwards she commented that she felt like 'the farang'. So it happens both ways.

 

Unfortunately there is no way of knowing whether or not your partner's intentions are good - the best of us can get ripped. So whilst I don't agree with what you say above in general, I would agree that there is often some truth in it.

 

However, as I said in an earlier post, its natural for a female to look for financial stability in any prospective relationship. The norm is for a couple to meet, marry and have kids - at which point the female is vulnerable through losing her ability to earn an income.  The female wants to know that both herself and her kids will be taken care of.

 

Couple that with the Thai societal norm of the kids taking care of their parents in their old age and it can seem that all Thai females are interested in is you're money.  Whilst that can be true, its not outright and it greatly depends on where you do your 'fishing'. I've learned to my cost that meeting females on dating websites and Tinder etc. is not at all the best place if you're looking for a relationship.  I'm not even going to try guess at percentages - I'd just say that your chances of meeting a 'wrong un' through such sources are very, very high. If you go fishing in a dirty pond, don't expect clean fish.

[Chris Daley]

50 percent of everything you own?  Marriage is for losers.

[DudleySquat]

1 hour ago, MangoKorat said:

So it happens both ways.

 

Not often.

[DudleySquat]

1 hour ago, MangoKorat said:

I'd just say that your chances of meeting a 'wrong un' through such sources are very, very high. If you go fishing in a dirty pond, don't expect clean fish.

 

Panning for gold is a dirty business. Do it correctly, and you will find shiny gold. Look for the gold.

[MangoKorat]

1 hour ago, Chris Daley said:

50 percent of everything you own?  Marriage is for losers.

Not if you know what you're doing. Divorced more times than I care to admit - never gave any one of them a penny.

[MangoKorat]

17 minutes ago, DudleySquat said:

 

Not often.

True but going by the recent stories about Thai females being scammed online, its growing.

[DudleySquat]

2 minutes ago, MangoKorat said:

True but going by the recent stories about Thai females being scammed online, its growing.

 

Online scamming is growing. 

[thaibeachlovers]

11 hours ago, DudleySquat said:

 

Speak for yourself. Your way sucks. 

I was speaking for myself. That's why I included an IMO- duh!

[DudleySquat]

Try to talk to yourself in an affirming way. 

 

The American way is much better than most around the world. We are just smarter.

[NextG]

19 hours ago, BritManToo said:

I'm not sure any man can have a relationship with any female without paying for it. The only difference is her payment plan.

Wrong!

Take the blinkers off. 

[thaibeachlovers]

On 1/9/2024 at 1:39 AM, MangoKorat said:

Couple that with the Thai societal norm of the kids taking care of their parents in their old age and it can seem that all Thai females are interested in is you're money.  Whilst that can be true, its not outright and it greatly depends on where you do your 'fishing'. I've learned to my cost that meeting females on dating websites and Tinder etc. is not at all the best place if you're looking for a relationship.  I'm not even going to try guess at percentages - I'd just say that your chances of meeting a 'wrong un' through such sources are very, very high. If you go fishing in a dirty pond, don't expect clean fish.

That's interesting.

Soooooo, if one is a strange farang that thinks "normal" Thai women are interested in meeting, and bonking a farang, where does that strange farang find one if not on a dating site?

I'm talking about Joe Bloggs who isn't badly off, but doesn't work in LOS, and stupidly think a "normal" Thai woman isn't going to rip him off, because they are "different".

 

[BigStar]

5 hours ago, thaibeachlovers said:

Soooooo, if one is a strange farang that thinks "normal" Thai women are interested in meeting, and bonking a farang, where does that strange farang find one if not on a dating site?

 

Nowhere. Normal good Thai women aren't interested in meeting and bonking a farang. Typical monger, "strange" or not, fantasy: instant free sex with nice, low-mileage Thai women 'cause he's just so wonderful.

 

Edited January 10 by BigStar

[thaibeachlovers]

11 hours ago, BigStar said:

 

Nowhere. Normal good Thai women aren't interested in meeting and bonking a farang. Typical monger, "strange" or not, fantasy: instant free sex with nice, low-mileage Thai women 'cause he's just so wonderful.

 

Unusually, you wrote something I can agree with.

 

I just laugh when I read the fairy tales by guys that claim there are thousands of "good", non prostitute Thai women with uni degrees and great well paying jobs out there just gagging to have some farang give them a rogering.

I'll only go as far as accepting that there are some that will have a free dinner at an expensive restaurant, but that's as far as it goes without some actual commitment in a proper relationship.

[MangoKorat]

16 hours ago, thaibeachlovers said:

That's interesting.

Soooooo, if one is a strange farang that thinks "normal" Thai women are interested in meeting, and bonking a farang, where does that strange farang find one if not on a dating site?

I'm talking about Joe Bloggs who isn't badly off, but doesn't work in LOS, and stupidly think a "normal" Thai woman isn't going to rip him off, because they are "different".

Is there any point in continuing this discussion? Your attitude towards Thai women is quite clear and extremely common. Its easy to recognise as I also held the same views at one time. If all you are looking for is a quick jump, then sites like Tinder and Thai Friendly will suit you fine.

 

Things changed for me when my priorities in life changed. The girls I've met recently have been in local clubs and bars and at social events.  The language barrier, in my experience, plays large in such circumstances but once it becomes clear that you can speak enough Thai to get by, things change and girls become far more amenable.  I wouldn't say that any of the girls that I've met recently were particularly 'interested in meeting, and bonking a farang'  as you state - more that they were interested in meeting a man.

 

These days when I go out, I simply go out socially - I don't go out 'on the hunt' but if the opportunity arises, I'm still game. I am however, quite happy to come home alone.

[thaibeachlovers]

8 minutes ago, MangoKorat said:

Is there any point in continuing this discussion? Your attitude towards Thai women is quite clear and extremely common. Its easy to recognise as I also held the same views at one time. If all you are looking for is a quick jump, then sites like Tinder and Thai Friendly will suit you fine.

 

Things changed for me when my priorities in life changed. The girls I've met recently have been in local clubs and bars and at social events.  The language barrier, in my experience, plays large in such circumstances but once it becomes clear that you can speak enough Thai to get by, things change and girls become far more amenable.  I wouldn't say that any of the girls that I've met recently were particularly 'interested in meeting, and bonking a farang'  as you state - more that they were interested in meeting a man.

 

These days when I go out, I simply go out socially - I don't go out 'on the hunt' but if the opportunity arises, I'm still game. I am however, quite happy to come home alone.

Your attitude towards Thai women is quite clear and extremely common.

 

Do tell?

 

I like Thai women, and preferred them to the western variety. I met many and almost all ( with some notable exceptions ) were very nice people. I had girlfriends for many years, though at that stage I was not interested in marriage and they usually found someone else to marry.

 

It's an interesting concept that because a woman takes money for sex she is less than one that doesn't. I have never found that to be true. The worst woman in my life was a western never a prostitute, while many prostitutes I met, western and Thai were wonderful people.

 

You are happy to have platonic relationships with Thai women- I had many such with western women.

However, I think most men would want more out of a relationship with a female of any variety. Human men are a sexual animal- it's in our genes.

 

I wouldn't say that any of the girls that I've met recently were particularly 'interested in meeting, and bonking a farang'  as you state - more that they were interested in meeting a man.

Which is exactly what I have been saying. Despite some poster's wet dreams, Thai women are not all up for rumpty with any farang that happens to meet them.

 

Is there any point in continuing this discussion?

That's up to you. It makes no difference to me if you do or don't. I have my opinions that I post, and if anyone wants to respond that's up to them.

[thaibeachlovers]

On 1/9/2024 at 12:54 AM, MangoKorat said:

That is not me trying to appear any better - its just that through being involved in Thai society and mixing with far more Thai's than foreigners, I know very well that decent Thai females do exist. I also know that many of those females are not against a relationship with an older foreign man - once you break down the barriers.  And there are barriers - not least of which is the way they are often viewed by other Thai's if they're seen out with an older foreigner.

Just curious. Why would any Thai woman want to get involved with any farang man of any age unless they perceive some benefit from doing so?

Are all Thai men so bad that an alien is preferable? I gave up on western women as they seem to have abandoned femininity and I have no interest in living with a "PC wanabe man" woman. I did try it, to my everlasting regret.

 

On 1/9/2024 at 12:54 AM, MangoKorat said:

Some Thai girls are way too scared to even attempt to speak to a foreigner - that face thing where they seem to think they will be considered a lesser being if the pronounce something wrong.

 

I disagree about the language thing. IMO it's more that they know how other Thais will regard them if they do take up with a farang man.

I've had personal experience of that with a Thai woman that was willing to go out with me, just as long as we didn't actually walk together in public.

 

[sidjameson]

4 hours ago, thaibeachlovers said:

 

I disagree about the language thing. IMO it's more that they know how other Thais will regard them if they do take up with a farang man.

I've had personal experience of that with a Thai woman that was willing to go out with me, just as long as we didn't actually walk together in public.

 

What year was that? I'm literally sat with my girl now in the ministry of education canteen where she works and all her colleagues are exceptionally friendly to us. 

I remember when girls in every Asian country feared being seen as a ho just for walking with a foreigner, but in most places those days are long gone.

[noobexpat]

4 hours ago, thaibeachlovers said:

 

I've had personal experience of that with a Thai woman that was willing to go out with me, just as long as we didn't actually walk together in public.

 

 

Probably your appearance, rather than some cultural thing.

[thaibeachlovers]

1 hour ago, sidjameson said:

What year was that? I'm literally sat with my girl now in the ministry of education canteen where she works and all her colleagues are exceptionally friendly to us. 

I remember when girls in every Asian country feared being seen as a ho just for walking with a foreigner, but in most places those days are long gone.

Early 90s, when Thailand really was the land of smiles, and a fun place to hang out in.

[thaibeachlovers]

51 minutes ago, noobexpat said:

 

Probably your appearance, rather than some cultural thing.

I see from your post count that you not speaking from your extensive knowledge of Thailand gleaned from decades of hard won experience, but must be making some sort of joke.

 

555

[thaibeachlovers]

On 1/9/2024 at 3:05 AM, MangoKorat said:

Not if you know what you're doing. Divorced more times than I care to admit - never gave any one of them a penny.

You obviously don't live in NZ then. Just living together for 2 or 3 years is enough to be considered "legally married' and de facto have to hand over 50% of everything earned post marriage ( just like Thailand, if not mutually agreed, but in NZ that is not an option ). If children involved the wife normally gets the kids and the house till they grow up, after which the house has to be sold and proceeds split.

I'm a great believer in renting for that reason.

[DudleySquat]

10 hours ago, thaibeachlovers said:

Unusually, you wrote something I can agree with.

 

I just laugh when I read the fairy tales by guys that claim there are thousands of "good", non prostitute Thai women with uni degrees and great well paying jobs out there just gagging to have some farang give them a rogering.

I'll only go as far as accepting that there are some that will have a free dinner at an expensive restaurant, but that's as far as it goes without some actual commitment in a proper relationship.

 

You are forgetting your demographics. There is a huge difference between 20 and 30's and 40's. 

 

But you don't want to get encumbered by facts, do you?

[DudleySquat]

3 hours ago, thaibeachlovers said:

You obviously don't live in NZ then. Just living together for 2 or 3 years is enough to be considered "legally married' and de facto have to hand over 50% of everything earned post marriage ( just like Thailand, if not mutually agreed, but in NZ that is not an option ). If children involved the wife normally gets the kids and the house till they grow up, after which the house has to be sold and proceeds split.

I'm a great believer in renting for that reason.

 

it's called a common-law marriage. 

[DudleySquat]

4 hours ago, noobexpat said:

 

Probably your appearance, rather than some cultural thing.

 

Hiding from her husband.

[noobexpat]

26 minutes ago, DudleySquat said:

 

it's called a common-law marriage. 

 

Depends on the country.

 

Called de facto in NZ

Doesn't exist in UK

[noobexpat]

4 hours ago, thaibeachlovers said:

I see from your post count that you not speaking from your extensive knowledge of Thailand gleaned from decades of hard won experience, but must be making some sort of joke.

 

555

 

Strange assumption from a post count. 

14 years visiting and still under age 50.

 

Any thai girlfriend who thinks they could disrespect me, like you were, would never be allowed in my vicinity again.

 

My standards are high and rightly so. I have it all.