Hide your women and cattle and head for open country
-
Recently Browsing 0 members
- No registered users viewing this page.
Announcements
-
Topics
-
Latest posts...
-
20
Foreigners brawl on Patong Beach sparks criticism of Thai laws
Throw them both in jail, giving us a bad name in Thailand who respect Thai Law. Both scum!! -
20
Foreigners brawl on Patong Beach sparks criticism of Thai laws
why is this news? in any bar area anywhere in the world there are fights you've confused Patong with walking street & soi 6 in Pattaya 5555 -
0
The Subtle Shift from Boyfriend to ‘Useful Assistant’ in Thailand
After spending decades here in Thailand, I’ve had my share of long-term relationships with Thai women. Some worked in the nightlife scene; others had more conventional jobs. But in all cases, there was never any money involved. None of these relationships were a sex-for-money exchange. They grew from connection, curiosity, and a genuine desire to be with each other. And for a while, it was just that—simple, fun, even a bit idyllic. I moved in with some, stayed separate from others, but each felt like a real partnership. Yet over time, something subtle, almost unspoken, would shift. What began as a classic love story somehow evolved into something… well, different. One day you’re the boyfriend, sharing laughs and the occasional cultural misstep, and the next, you feel like a mix of partner, assistant, and on-call problem-solver—kind of like a boyfriend service. The funny thing was, nothing was ever asked of me directly. It was as if I’d been drafted into a new role without warning, a subtle shift I couldn’t pinpoint until I was already in too deep. In the beginning, I chalked it up to the honeymoon period ending—that natural point where real life seeps in, and the glow of new romance takes on a different light. But it became something I noticed time and time again. It was as if each relationship, regardless of her background, went through the same phases, with the same unspoken expectations rising to the surface. Don’t get me wrong; I never minded helping out—it often gave me satisfaction to help with the day-to-day things that were tough for them. And sure, it’s natural for any relationship to have moments of give-and-take, a balance that ebbs and flows. But somewhere along the line, that balance tipped, and suddenly I found myself playing a role I hadn’t realized I’d signed up for. It went beyond simple favors. It became expected that I’d be the reliable one, the steady fixture for life’s little demands. Over time, I began to feel less like a partner and more like a fixture in the background, always expected to be ready to step in when needed. What was surprising was how natural this shift felt—like it wasn’t questioned on either side. I never saw it as manipulation or something done consciously. Like something you just do for someone else when you care about their well being. It was more as if a script was unfolding that neither of us had written but both knew by heart. And I suppose I went along with it, partly out of affection, partly because it just seemed to happen so quietly. The strange part? It didn’t feel unfair, just… strangely inevitable. I’ve asked myself whether I’m somehow inviting this role, unintentionally giving off the vibe of someone who’s willing to take on those responsibilities. Maybe there’s some truth to that. Maybe, in the early days of dating, I’d unconsciously offer to help out a little more than necessary, thinking I was just being polite, caring and nice and crossing one of those cultural bridges. Or maybe it’s that in Thailand, with its unique balance of independence and family ties, stepping in for each other is just part of the dynamic. What strikes me now, looking back, is how universal this experience became across all the different relationships. All five of the relationships lasted at least five years each. And it didn’t matter if she’d come from a small rural town or had a Bangkok upbringing. It was like, once the honeymoon phase faded and things started becoming more comfortable, I became someone functional above and beyond being the romantic partner. I went from being the spontaneous boyfriend to the one you turn to for life’s little logistical issues, the one who helps smooth over the everyday hiccups. I guess, on some level, I thought this shift would happen in any long-term relationship, regardless of country or culture. But something about it here, in this setting, in Thailand, feels a bit more amplified. Maybe it’s the unspoken expectations or the social dynamics that add weight to the role. Sometimes, I wonder if it’s just one of those cross-cultural quirks—where what one person sees as practical, another sees as a kind of slow encroachment. Or maybe it’s simply part of the way things flow in a relationship where two worlds meet, not always understanding each other but somehow finding a rhythm. Does it perhaps gravitate back towards the concept that men are always supposed to be the providers and protectors in some way? So, I’m left with this strange feeling of being on both sides—grateful to be trusted, but wary of becoming a bit too indispensable. I can’t help but wonder if others have felt this too: the slow shift from lover to something else, not unwanted but undeniably different than just being a boyfriend in the conventional sense. Has anyone else found themselves in this in-between? Not exactly a life assistant, but not quite just a boyfriend either? And does that change the way you see the relationship with a Thai woman, knowing that while you’re still “together,” it’s taken on a flavor that’s, well, part romantic, part everyday care giver? -
49
Abortion - the last electoral dance
You are the one that always proclaims that you are the winner and everyone else is a loser, get a life -
68
How to stop the Boats.
I like the idea of number 3. Get them on pot hole filling, duty, straight away. win win. -
49
-
20
Foreigners brawl on Patong Beach sparks criticism of Thai laws
Patong is one of the most blighted and horrific places in Thailand. Having accompanied a friend there last year, I would never return. It is dreadful, and it attracting the lowest quality tourists in its history. The cops here are very weak. For us, there is a good and a bad side to that. In the US, they can be overzealous. Here? -
2,399
Thailand to tax residents’ foreign income irrespective of remittance
Old, NoDisplay and ChiangMai - thanks for the heads up. PwC also list the UK as having DT status although the UK seems missing from some lists. Old - in your earlier post - "Hopefully a tax clearance certificate will not be required for annual extensions". I hope that proves to be the case for my renewal in January. GLA
-
-
Popular in The Pub
Recommended Posts
Create an account or sign in to comment
You need to be a member in order to leave a comment
Create an account
Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!
Register a new accountSign in
Already have an account? Sign in here.
Sign In Now