58 minutes ago, Hummin said:

The art of knowing the difference of innocent flirting/ joking, and someone hitting on you.

no it wasn't innocent flirting.

there were a few intense stares on her part.

maybe she really wants to stick it to me.

happened to me once before. a girl I kept seeing at work was flirting, then I ended up in the emergency room. I thought I was having a heart attack.

it's an energetic thing. if a woman is directing a certain energy towards you for a long period of time, it has an effect on your heart.

but the heart is a little understood organ.

it's not just a pump!

 

9 minutes ago, save the frogs said:

no it wasn't innocent flirting.

there were a few intense stares on her part.

maybe she really wants to stick it to me.

happened to me once before. a girl I kept seeing at work was flirting, then I ended up in the emergency room. I thought I was having a heart attack.

it's an energetic thing. if a woman is directing a certain energy towards you for a long period of time, it has an effect on your heart.

but the heart is a little understood organ.

it's not just a pump!

 

I think you think to much, 

On 10/18/2024 at 10:55 PM, SAFETY FIRST said:

These guys are just frustrated, loser guys who can't get a bit, can't find a girlfriend, your typical cry baby. 

Same with the guys who call girls gold diggers, loser guys. 

 

 

I think you are only saying that in defence of your own transactional relationship. Stop the money flow and see if you can get a girl.

The 'losers' are the ones who have to pay to get a girl. I've lost count as the amount of 'losers' girls who have come on to me, told me about the accommodations for which their 'loser' was paying, bought me dinner and drinks(likely with their loser's money) and told me how they hate being forced to have sex with then when they turn up on a visit.

Of course, yours is different. 

Personally, I don't think that you should go around calling people losers for being discerning. Do you think your girlfriend finds you attractive? I'm quite sure that she does not. So why does she stay? Money.

That's not something about which to boast. You might think yourself a winner, but others may look and think otherwise. So best overall to live and let live and not be quite so judgemental about others.

What do you think about that?

19 hours ago, Cameroni said:

 

Can you say a little about why it was so volatile?

 

I'm talking to her about that right now. Don't want to discuss someone else's personal life here, but let's say she was already a 'widow' by the time I met her at seventeen years of age(her ID showed her as twenty five).

Lots of different pressures and worries.

11 hours ago, save the frogs said:

A really cute girl at work has been hitting on me for several weeks now.

 

And I have really fallen for her. Sometimes she stares at me intensely for about 30 seconds across the office. It's hard to resist those glances.

 

But she doesn't want to meet outside work. Seems like she is just playing games and trying to get attention from me.

She probably has 1 or 3 other guys on the side.

 

I should have known it was too good to be true since she is too young and way out of my league. But she started hitting on me. 

 

Watch out for those man-eaters, guys. Watch out boy, she'll chew you up. 

 

 

 

So you asked her out and she said "no"?

 

4 hours ago, NowNow said:

The 'losers' are the ones who have to pay to get a girl. I've lost count as the amount of 'losers' girls who have come on to me, told me about the accommodations for which their 'loser' was paying, bought me dinner and drinks(likely with their loser's money) and told me how they hate being forced to have sex with then when they turn up on a visit.

You're OK with sloppy seconds, as long as you don't have to finance them.

I don't mind that, I can afford to have my go before you!

 

But I would say, if they badmouthed me after my turn, they are sure to badmouth you to their next conquest.

 

No force involved on my part, just money, which they can freely choose to earn ......... or not.

4 minutes ago, BritManToo said:

You're OK with sloppy seconds, as long as you don't have to finance them.

I don't mind that, I can afford to have my go before you!

 

But I would say, if they badmouthed me after my turn, they are sure to badmouth you to their next conquest.

 

No. I don't fraternize with prostitutes at all. So you would not ever get a turn.

It's you with the sloppy seconds.... or you can pay continually for exclusivity of a diminishing product. Up to you. My girls actually like me and stay without any financial incentive. You don't get to move up to that class. You already made your choice.

5 minutes ago, NowNow said:

 

No. I don't fraternize with prostitutes at all. So you would not ever get a turn.

It's you with the sloppy seconds.... or you can pay continually for exclusivity of a diminishing product. Up to you. My girls actually like me and stay without any financial incentive. You don't get to move up to that class. You already made your choice.

If they aren't hookers, how did they buy your dinner/drinks with their 'losers' money?

2 minutes ago, BritManToo said:

If they aren't hookers, how did they buy your dinner/drinks with their 'losers' money?

 

Aaah....I see. You jumped to conclusions. There were many different scenarios. But just dealing with the scenario that you have mentioned here....

Let's say I made many friends along the way. They all knew that I would not ever accept a bar girl or even an ex-bar girl as a partner. (The one time it happened was almost out of my control and she gave up her 'bad' job in order to work in a restaurant in order to give us a chance.

When people value you, they make sacrifices)

But that doesn't stop girls from trying or simply inviting you out because they want to be in your company. It doesn't often happen to sleazy sex tourists, as they are viewed differently than someone who is trusted and respected. 

So no, sex with them was not ever going to happen, even if they offered to pay. If I'm giving my best, I only accept the best for myself. Others are welcome to scrape the barrel. Up to them.

19 minutes ago, BritManToo said:

If they aren't hookers, how did they buy your dinner/drinks with their 'losers' money?

 

I forgot to add that they weren't all 'hookers' and sometimes it was their own money. But as you know, lines can get blurred, especially in places like Pattaya. So even if no hookers, there might be promiscuity. Not in all cases, but I wasn't interested in taking a chance. Some of these girls were quite attractive by anyone's standard. But I am not easily swayed. I would even have pretty girls visiting my place on their days off or perhaps even after than had been bar-fined....asking me why I didn't want to have sex with them. For me, there was no connection. They were just meat to me. Not interesting for me. Sent them packing. No money ever asked for, offered nor given.

If you had experienced my younger life, you might understand better. 95% of the time it was me saying no. This includes minor celebrities in the music biz and fairly wealthy women. Do you imagine that I would willingly lower myself to a scabby Pattaya prostitute?

Some of us kept our standards. Some others just make their excuses and lie to themselves.

 

But it's not just black and white. You had good intentions, worked to elevate your partner and have a family. 

Of course most online discussions are missing these nuances, so it seems that you have to be on one side or the other.

But in reality, it's not like that at all.

We only clash when you make ridiculous definitive statements that are simply not truer.

 

 

 

6 minutes ago, NowNow said:

Do you imagine that I would willingly lower myself to a scabby Pattaya prostitute?

Why else visit Pattaya?

11 minutes ago, BritManToo said:

Why else visit Pattaya?

 

Not for the reason that sex starved you would imagine.

5 minutes ago, NowNow said:

Not for the reason that sex starved you would imagine.

I've not been sex starved since my Brit wife divorced me.

But the topic is ........... trustworthy Thai girls, and I've never noticed any women were trustworthy.

49 minutes ago, BritManToo said:

 

But the topic is ........... trustworthy Thai girls, and I've never noticed any women were trustworthy.

 

There are trustworthy women, I was 12 years in with one, and 20 with another. Neither cheated and were loyal sexually, trustworthy,well, of course not 100%.

 

There are  4 billion women in the world, so they can't all be the same.

 

The problem is that infidelity is massively prevalent. Women are closing the infidelity gap. For centuries men could practice infidelity with near impunity. Now, women, freed from censure by church, economic constraints and no longer concerned about getting pregnant, the sad reality is women have been catching up and there is now a minor difference only in infidelity figures for women and men.

 

It is not far off the mark to say that 50% of women in relationships today will cheat.

1 hour ago, BritManToo said:

I've not been sex starved since my Brit wife divorced me.

But the topic is ........... trustworthy Thai girls, and I've never noticed any women were trustworthy.

 

That's your 'bad' luck I guess. Seek and you shall find. Perhaps you were in a bit of a hurry.

20 hours ago, Cameroni said:

Getting women to have sex, it's not impossible really, just harder for a guy, but you'll find girls who are up for it I'm sure. Honesty, in your case, clearly will make it harder. 

I already do but when you're honest and don't claim to be looking for anything serious - its much harder.

 

Short term  = 1 night +

5 hours ago, Cameroni said:

 

So you asked her out and she said "no"?

 

I gave her my number and said I wanted to talk to her. She never called.

She just wants to mess with me in the office. 

I wonder if she's one of these girls who does the same to multiple guys in offices.

it happened to a friend of mine many years ago. he literally fell in love with a girl at the office, but then realized she was sleeping with a lot of guys in the office. 

in those situations, you practically need to find a new job.

 

which I may also have to do, as she is getting under my skin. and I dont like the job anyway.

 

 

13 minutes ago, save the frogs said:

I gave her my number and said I wanted to talk to her. She never called.

She just wants to mess with me in the office. 

I wonder if she's one of these girls who does the same to multiple guys in offices.

it happened to a friend of mine many years ago. he literally fell in love with a girl at the office, but then realized she was sleeping with a lot of guys in the office. 

in those situations, you practically need to find a new job.

 

which I may also have to do, as she is getting under my skin. and I dont like the job anyway.

 

 

 

I would try to make a firm date, tell her day and time, see if she agrees. She may be shy to call a guy, but if she is confronted with a firm plan for fun and just has to say yes, maybe she'll go for it.

15 minutes ago, MangoKorat said:

I already do but when you're honest and don't claim to be looking for anything serious - its much harder.

 

Short term  = 1 night +

 

So you as of 2024 you've not had a girl longer than what, 3 days  or a week, two weeks?

I get attractive women come to my front door in Sri change mai ,and give me titty rub when their husbands are out of town,so that may give you a clue,,

19 hours ago, 3NUMBAS said:

I get attractive women come to my front door in Sri change mai ,and give me titty rub when their husbands are out of town,so that may give you a clue,,

 

This post illustrates that for men there has always been pressure to boast, to play up, to exaggerate, when it comes to sex, whereas for women, it has always been a matter of downplaying, minimzing and understating, when it comes to sex. Think what that says about the reality of the male sexual experience. Let that sink in slowly.

23 hours ago, Cameroni said:

 

So you as of 2024 you've not had a girl longer than what, 3 days  or a week, two weeks?

Been that way for 2 or 3 years and I'm loving it.

23 hours ago, Cameroni said:

 

So you as of 2024 you've not had a girl longer than what, 3 days  or a week, two weeks?

My longest is an hour, works great

18 hours ago, MangoKorat said:

Been that way for 2 or 3 years and I'm loving it.

 

I applaud the alternative lifestyle experiment.

 

Do you not feel you're missing out on a few things though?

so now we're rehashing the debate about the virtues of short-term hookers vs long term relationships?

 

love all the way, despite its perils.

 

better to have loved and lost ... 

13 minutes ago, save the frogs said:

so now we're rehashing the debate about the virtues of short-term hookers vs long term relationships?

 

love all the way, despite its perils.

 

better to have loved and lost ... 

 

I agree with this. Even in the hell of betrayal, you learn things about yourself you would not learn if you had not experienced it.

4 hours ago, Cameroni said:

 

I applaud the alternative lifestyle experiment.

 

Do you not feel you're missing out on a few things though?

Not at all.

 

Missing out on what?  Lies? Nagged at for going for a beer or to play pool?  Treated as an ATM? Yeah sure, I miss all that.

23 hours ago, scubascuba3 said:

My longest is an hour, works great

You can get treatment for that.....

1 hour ago, MangoKorat said:

Not at all.

 

Missing out on what?  Lies? Nagged at for going for a beer or to play pool?  Treated as an ATM? Yeah sure, I miss all that.

 

Well for instance a deep emotional connection with a woman.

 

Support on all kinds of levels, household work, emotional presence and small daily things.

 

Achieving shared goals.

 

 

On 10/14/2024 at 10:59 PM, Cameroni said:

That's very interesting. So both at the higher end when they proved to be faithful. Could be that by age 30 a woman has gone through the stage of party experiments and learnt that these are not welcome or forgiven by a man in a relationship? Hence by age 30 they are more likely to be faithful? Or ist that nonsense?

I remember reading many years back that it is generally accepted by those who study human traits that females have mostly developed whatever traits they will present in future life is fairly fixed by age 35.

For males that increases to 45.

That obviously is a generalized situation but could go a long way in explaining the frequent "pairing" of couples with around at least 10 years of age difference.

"She" is in the last years of prime child bearing stage and "He" is past the "one of the party boys" stage.

That despite the bar stool denials from bitter divorcees who ran away from a marriage at 25 that crashed at 30 with at least one "accidental" child keeping them poor.