1 hour ago, transam said:

How do you find out if a lady has all of those features for long term over a date..

 

Obviously you do all you can to find out about her character, her past, her family. Clearly her true character only comes out after a longer period.. Women hide their real character for a long time.

 

1 hour ago, transam said:

At 53, you are not serious about finding a lady with all your requirements at 18-25 are you.....

 

 I am very serious. We pair bond with our equals. I am a good looking guy, I'm honest, loyal, and I expect nothing less. Women over that age aren't attractive to me. And even if they are, they have so much baggage and exes and problems and harsh behaviour then, it's not interesting to me.

 

1 hour ago, transam said:

It's No wonder you are having no luck, and I think you should come to the conclusion you may remain single...

 

Admittedly, targeting the 18-25 age range will have challenges, the propensity to cheat, party and so on, but I have so many dates I would be amazed that eventually a real deal will not be caught eventually. It's a long game. You have to be patient. 

8 minutes ago, Cameroni said:

 

Obviously you do all you can to find out about her character, her past, her family. Clearly her true character only comes out after a longer period.. Women hide their real character for a long time.

 

 

 I am very serious. We pair bond with our equals. I am a good looking guy, I'm honest, loyal, and I expect nothing less. Women over that age aren't attractive to me. And even if they are, they have so much baggage and exes and problems and harsh behaviour then, it's not interesting to me.

 

 

Admittedly, targeting the 18-25 age range will have challenges, the propensity to cheat, party and so on, but I have so many dates I would be amazed that eventually a real deal will not be caught eventually. It's a long game. You have to be patient. 

If you say so...............🤭

On 6/26/2025 at 3:44 PM, save the frogs said:

with apps, you know the woman is single and looking.

 

if you start hitting on random women, many of them are not even available. there's benefits to apps.

 

 

If you can't take 'no' for an answer don't play the game.

 

If you can, then just move on to the next prospect when you get a no. You don't wanna bed every woman you meet either, do you? Sometimes even the pretties can be a turn off. And sometimes theunassuming and plain can turn out to be a real ball o' fun.

 

Real players can distinguish.

On 6/26/2025 at 12:43 PM, scubascuba3 said:

Massage ladies often speak a little English and less hardened vs bar girls

Are you talking about traditional massage ladies or sex massage? 

50 minutes ago, thecyclist said:

Are you talking about traditional massage ladies or sex massage? 

Thai massage shops where they wear the traditional outfits, often do specials+

13 hours ago, scubascuba3 said:

Thai massage shops where they wear the traditional outfits, often do specials+

 

Nah, they're pretty much the same if they're doing HJ and more ...

They're jaded and their souls barely comprehend what love is anymore, if they ever did. 

 

 

6 hours ago, save the frogs said:

 

Nah, they're pretty much the same if they're doing HJ and more ...

They're jaded and their souls barely comprehend what love is anymore, if they ever did. 

 

 

obviously you have to choose carefully, ideally noobs

On 6/28/2025 at 11:56 AM, BusyB said:

If you can, then just move on to the next prospect when you get a no. You don't wanna bed every woman you meet either, do you? Sometimes even the pretties can be a turn off. And sometimes theunassuming and plain can turn out to be a real ball o' fun.

 

Yah, it's really strange, sometimes a perfectly good looking woman, who seems to fulfill all the criteria aesthetically, just doesn't do it for me. Very odd.

 

It really is a mystery, you only need to look 5 seconds and you know if she's a prospect.

Long time Camaroni fan. Godspeed on his long shot mission.
 

I have no problem with live approach, but I would prefer it to be in a setting where I at least have the possibility to see them again a few times.
 

There’s a regular brunch I go to and a couple of  meets with lots of regulars. Plus The Siam Society.
 

I am currently on a yoga retreat on Ko Samui. There are four reasonable older Thai women who are sending out attracted to me vibes and enjoy talking to me.We will be having 18 meals together in the next six days.

 

Whether or not I get with any of them, I am still being vetted as an acceptable Whitey to consider. The more social proof I build up, to use an old red pill term, the better.
 

Also, I really love my life, and I’m not in any hurry to have a girlfriend. That means that I care less than all of my prospective partners. That gives me a little bit of an upper hand.

 

I don’t mind admitting it, and I don’t mind playing it. Cameroni needs to take a leaf from this book.

 

Cold approach at a mall seems like a guarantee of failure 99.9% of the time.
 

Bignock claimed that he would cold approach much younger women and tell them jokes. And then they would drop what they were doing to be with him.

 

When asked to repeat one of these magic jokes, he ran away, like he always does. Just more dimwitted Bogan fantasy.

 

If people have actual, true, real life, experience of cold approaching women, and getting with them, that would be great to hear about.

 

My verdict: just let them have their aunt Ann’s pretzels and bubble tea in peace.

 

 

 

24 minutes ago, Cameroni said:

 

Yah, it's really strange, sometimes a perfectly good looking woman, who seems to fulfill all the criteria aesthetically, just doesn't do it for me. Very odd.

 

It really is a mystery, you only need to look 5 seconds and you know if she's a prospect.

 

Def

 

Attraction is always a mystery. And then they have to be attracted back, and in the right way.

 

And then they have to be functional, and also check a strong preference box or two. For me, it’s education.

 

That’s why it takes a long time to get things rolling with someone.

 

I am chatting with a Thai woman vacationing in Las Vegas. Her favorite American food is loaded fries, something I haven’t eaten in at least 20 years. We will see if we can move on from this topic or if it just dies on the vine.

 

 

17 minutes ago, Prubangboy said:

Long time Camaroni fan. Godspeed on his long shot mission.

 

As am I an admirer of your no-nonsense approach. And of course wishing you that you succeed.

 

17 minutes ago, Prubangboy said:

There’s a regular brunch I go to and a couple of  meets with lots of regulars. Plus The Siam Society.
 

I am currently on a yoga retreat on Ko Samui.

 

This is great stuff, exactly what you need to do, get out and about. Sitting at home watching TV would be the worst you could do. No woman will fall from the sky to sit on your sofa. You have to make it happen. You get it.

 

17 minutes ago, Prubangboy said:

The more social proof I build up

 

Something much easier to do in person, and exactly what you have to do. Again, you get it.

 

17 minutes ago, Prubangboy said:

Also, I really love my life, and I’m not in any hurry to have a girlfriend. That means that I care less than all of my prospective partners. That gives me a little bit of an upper hand.

 

Perfect. This vibe will greatly help you when you interact with women.

 

17 minutes ago, Prubangboy said:

Cold approach at a mall seems like a guarantee of failure 99.9% of the time.

 

Well, naturally the vast majority of cold approaches will end in rejection, that's perfectly normal. But 99 percent is too high. More like 80 to 85 percent. The trick is not to take it personally.

 

17 minutes ago, Prubangboy said:

Bignock claimed that he would cold approach much younger women and tell them jokes. And then they would drop what they were doing to be with him.

 

Humour would actually be good strategy, but it's hard to do with Chinese and Thai due to the language issue.

 

17 minutes ago, Prubangboy said:

My verdict: just let them have their aunt Ann’s pretzels and bubble tea in peace.

 

No,  you have to make it happen. Those guys who claim on dating apps too you should just write to girls who text you don't know what they're talking about. Most of my dates come from girls that I first write to, not those who  text me first. You have to make it happen. If you interrupt their record shopping or lunch, so be it.

The women I want – academic, a bit westernized, top 30% in looks- are not on the apps. I just asked the best looking one at our group table; she would never go near the apps. 
 

Plus, due to meeting women with no expectation or agenda live, I now have two women friends who are looking for prospective partners for me. 
 

Problem with the live long game approach:

 

You have to really like socializing, and be at least moderately good at it. If I go to the global nomad meet up at the deck on Tuesday night, I have to be OK with scanning the room, talking to four people, and hopping back in a grab cab 40 minutes later if there are no real prospects.
 

and there is a small outlay for cabs, drinks, and occasional admissions.

 

For Bignok, ฿300 may as well be ฿30 million.

 

 

 

 

31 minutes ago, Prubangboy said:

Def

 

Attraction is always a mystery. And then they have to be attracted back, and in the right way.

 

And then they have to be functional, and also check a strong preference box or two. For me, it’s education.

 

That’s why it takes a long time to get things rolling with someone.

 

I am chatting with a Thai woman vacationing in Las Vegas. Her favorite American food is loaded fries, something I haven’t eaten in at least 20 years. We will see if we can move on from this topic or if it just dies on the vine.

 

 

 

I'm convinced the number of women who truly reach those parts other women cannot reach, ie those girls who truly connect with you not just on the physical, sexual level, but also on an emotional and intellectual level, that number is very small. Maybe 5 or so per decade.

 

That's what makes the search so complex. Not saying you can't be with a girl and 3 months later jump face first into a rel with a great woman, that does happen, but on the whole, women you really connect with are rare. There's many good looking women, but those who really tick your physical box, your emotional box, and your intellectual box, they're few and far between.

 

I agree that looks is not enough, they have to fulfill other strong preferences. For me it's quirkiness, mystery and interest, if she wears a raspberry beret, I'm likely more interested than if she has a degree from the Sorbonne. The other is "can she be led, does she want to be led"? Some women today don't want to be housewives, don't want to submit to a man in any way. That doesn't work for me.

 

Good luck with the Vegas  girl, she sounds good.

 

 

20 minutes ago, Prubangboy said:

The women I want – academic, a bit westernized, top 30% in looks- are not on the apps. I just asked the best looking one at our group table; she would never go near the apps. 
 

Plus, due to meeting women with no expectation or agenda live, I now have two women friends who are looking for prospective partners for me. 
 

Problem with the live long game approach:

 

You have to really like socializing, and be at least moderately good at it. If I go to the global nomad meet up at the deck on Tuesday night, I have to be OK with scanning the room, talking to four people, and hopping back in a grab cab 40 minutes later if there are no real prospects.
 

and there is a small outlay for cabs, drinks, and occasional admissions.

 

For Bignok, ฿300 may as well be ฿30 million.

 

 

 

 

 

Don't believe her, I see plenty of girls like that on Bumble. Not TF, but Bumble has them.

 

Yes, going out has a price, I guess you can keep costs down in some ways, but ultimately living a life outside the house will always cost money.

 

You are on a very good path though, if anyone can succeed, I think it's you.

This search is not only complex, the search is also largely pointless. If I double my efforts, I would probably do about 5% better.
 

It’s down to luck. Either a great compatible partner exists physically in my realm, or they do not. If they do not, trying harder will not make them appear.

 

A fatuous loser A couple of pages back said that by changing my attitude, I could make such a person miraculously appear.

 

my approach is to fish where the fish are. But if there are no fish where the fish supposedly are, then my approach is to just give up, travel more, and get more into self development.

 

I will definitely reload Tinder, and try bumble for the first time while I’m down here in Ko Samui. I like the countercultural vibe here, but it’s not quite so full on as in Koh Phagnan next-door. May as well see what’s in the fish pond down here.

8 hours ago, Prubangboy said:

This search is not only complex, the search is also largely pointless. If I double my efforts, I would probably do about 5% better.
 

It’s down to luck. Either a great compatible partner exists physically in my realm, or they do not. If they do not, trying harder will not make them appear.

 

A fatuous loser A couple of pages back said that by changing my attitude, I could make such a person miraculously appear.

 

my approach is to fish where the fish are. But if there are no fish where the fish supposedly are, then my approach is to just give up, travel more, and get more into self development.

 

I will definitely reload Tinder, and try bumble for the first time while I’m down here in Ko Samui. I like the countercultural vibe here, but it’s not quite so full on as in Koh Phagnan next-door. May as well see what’s in the fish pond down here.

 

Yes, luck absolutely plays a role. I was in long term relationships from the age 17 when I had my first serious gf whom I was with for 12 years, to 52, as I: met another girl right after her. If you had told me at 51 that finding a girl suitable for a long term rel is a complex long term process fraught with many obstacles, that is down to luck, I would have cracked a smirk and said, like most guys that got lucky with a long term rel previously "Nah, it's not hard at all".

 

If you just look at the odds though, there are may be 3 million women in my age category, ie the ages I target, in Thailand. Of those 300,000 will have the physical attributes that I like. Based on cold approach data, 150,000 of those will have a boyfriend, in fact only 60,000 will be interested me, best case scenario. Of those maybe 6000 will have the character attributes I seek and will have real chemistry with me.

 

So, yes locating one of those 6000 women has something to do with luck for sure. But it also has a lot to do with what I do. If I write to certain amount of girls on apps like TF, Insta, Bumble, etc that will increase my oddds, it will get me dates, and I will meet some of girls possibly. If I go out the house and talk to women, again, that will increase my odds, and help me meet some of those girls. So to an extent, I make my own luck. I: can make it happen or not make it happen.

 

Smart guys like Michael Jordan will tell you: "I’ve missed more than 9,000 shots in my career. I’ve lost almost 300 games. Twenty-six times I’ve been trusted to take the game-winning shot and missed. I’ve failed over and over and over again in my life. And that is why I succeed."

 

It's the same with dating. If you work on your physical appearance, if you go out and cold approach thousands of girls unsuccessfully, if you write to thousands of girls on the apps unsuccessfully, all those things will help you succeed eventually. Or not.  But you certainly make your own luck to some degree.

 

 

18 hours ago, Cameroni said:

 

Yah, it's really strange, sometimes a perfectly good looking woman, who seems to fulfill all the criteria aesthetically, just doesn't do it for me. Very odd.

 

It really is a mystery, you only need to look 5 seconds and you know if she's a prospect.

 

I think it's called chemistry. Ain't mucha that online though.

 

I usually know very quickly if I need to go down a certain road or if I've already been there and done it, T-shirt and all. Call me jaded if you will 555

46 minutes ago, BusyB said:

 

I think it's called chemistry. Ain't mucha that online though.

 

I usually know very quickly if I need to go down a certain road or if I've already been there and done it, T-shirt and all. Call me jaded if you will 555

 

That's as good a name as any. It's quite perplexing. The other day I found myself looking at a photo of a perfectly attractive 20something girl. On paper she had all the attributes I want, beautiful long black hair, slim, pretty face.. Nothing wrong with her at all. But for some reason she just did not do for me, I could not bring myself to pursue her. I just didn't want to.

 

I think first impressions are very real. You really only need seconds to know if she's a candidate or a pass.

Chemistry is just mutual attraction plus readiness to get involved.
 

I read a good bit about how readiness is like the taxis you see driving down the street.

 

If the light on top of the car is not switched on, don’t bother trying to hail them, they won’t stop.
 

If the light is switched on, they are much less fussy about who they will pull over and accept a fare from.

 

Chemistry results when one part’s light is switched on and the other party wants to go to the airport and doesn’t want to argue about the fare.

 

Lately, I have realized that my taxi light is mostly switched off and at best only flickers intermittently.

 

If I am the passenger, I definitely notice an inclination to wave by several perfectly reasonable taxis with their lights fully switched on, waiting for a better one to come along.

 

I am apparently a long lost brother of Cameroni 

I played around with the meet your standards test after tweaking my own dealbreakers, and it was eye‑opening to see how my “type” lined up with real numbers. It made it way easier to figure out which preferences actually mattered to me and which were just vibes. It’s a fun way to sanity‑check expectations without taking the whole dating thing too seriously.

Having now based my self in Cambodia (next week ????!), I find most females can speak good to very good English. They've made the effort, since most foreigners speak no Khmer (and won't make an effort to learn it).

I profess to only knowing 1 word of Khmer (bong!!). I can speak Thai, Lao, French and Burmese (some of these languages I can speak and read very well, others more basic). I should make an effort to learn some Khmer for politeness sake, but my old brain is currently struggling with practicing 'I need to buy a car battery because my hotel has no generator' in Burmese language.......

Although Siem Reap has its own share of total 'slappers' and loser barang in Pub Street, I find most Khmer females very friendly and approachable and intelligent, able to discuss topics and not just say 'up to you..'. Most are physcially pretty as well :)

Siem Reap feels like a mini Chiang Mai to me, so I can see how it would appeal, particularly with the low prices

Anyway, I finally connected with a nice Thai woman on Tinder: an immigration lawyer, age 58, fluent in English, formally married to a westerner. Very petite, ultra lush brown hair, a solid eight looks wise with a very sweet disposition.

It’s been six weeks, we’ve taken too long getaways. We will probably end up together.

Thanks to all for participating in this thread.

Well done.

On 6/28/2025 at 10:58 AM, Freddy42OZ said:

 How do you start conversations with women you don't know, especially when you also don't know their age, whether they speak English, or whether they are even single?

Surely you don't just walk up to random beautiful women and start talking to them in the hope they can speak English, are single and looking for a BF.

The 7-11 girls are pretty good, those at restaurants, forex bank tellers etc (if you absolutely must speak English). It’s best if they see you a few times to know your face and then steam in there when you get the eye-flash. Being able to make a woman laugh is a must… and having the face of an angel also helps to some extent 😋

Not knocking folks here but find dating apps a bit desperate and sleazy. Just approach them when the time is right AND F SMILE! 🙂

What signals caused you to bail or forge on when talking to the forex agent? What’s the age difference typically? What about the fact that the more good-looking they are, the more likely they are to already have a boyfriend??

What’s your ratio of conversion from a friendly jokey approach, to motivating them to have a coffee with you, and then seeing them after that?

In my seven month search, I probably cold approached like this a dozen times, resulting in one coffee date with a good looking middle-aged Thai woman at a perfume counter

she was married, but enjoyed the bit of flattery.