Well today i had some weird astrological chart done (dont ask me why, i just thought it would be fun).

Was very surprised at how accurate it was.

One thing that came up on the chart is that when it comes to love I am loyal and fun loving, but also a romantic.

Ive always felt embarrassed about this side of me, not quite sure why. (I dont mean heavy heavy on the mushy mushy stuff tho'!).

So anyway, would you say you are a romantic or not? Do you think romance is outdated? ...and etc.

..is this topic even interesting?

I too am a romantic and like you not a mushy mushy type. Romance is certainly not outdated. It's alive and well in our house.

Not where women are concerned.

I doubt men were ever romantic other than as a means to an end.

Anything you post is interesting eek.

Oh yeah, Romance is essential.

And no,not just as a means to an end.

I love to get the candles out, obtain some flowers, treat my woman to a good home-cooked meal and cuddle up to a good movie - or treat her to a massage and all that other mushy stuff.

It's not a way of life, but it's certainly enjoyable to do from time to time.

I don't do valentines day much though.

I prefer to think of every day as a possible valentine day.

I once had wild sex with the 'Missa Solemnis' on the box...(Beethoven is supposed t'be a Romantic composer). We came to our senses laying halfway inna wardrobe closet on top of sum shoes... we were justa couple of kids (me 21 and her 18) having a party but couldn't get enough of each other.

Then I became obsessed and wanted to possess her...she eventually pulled away and I was left contemplating mortality...

no shit...this really happened...an' some people claim that tutsi is a cynical old <deleted>...

you want romance? I got romance (goddamit)

I gotta admit that I watched Claude Berri's 'Manon de Source' (second part of 'Jean de Florette') last night with its tragic subplot of obsessive attraction so that I was reminded of my miserable circumstances almost 40 years ago...story telling is amazing that way...

at least I had sex with the object of my desire and didn't sew a ribbon from her hair into the flesh of my chest...goes to show that romance ain't just about flowers and champange...like someone sang some years ago, Love Hurts...

Oh yeah, Romance is essential.

And no,not just as a means to an end.

I love to get the candles out, obtain some flowers, treat my woman to a good home-cooked meal and cuddle up to a good movie - or treat her to a massage and all that other mushy stuff.

It's not a way of life, but it's certainly enjoyable to do from time to time.

I don't do valentines day much though.

I prefer to think of every day as a possible valentine day.

Agreed on the Valentines Day, a more cynical exploitation could not be found (outside of Xmas anyway)

My dad is a romantic, he'd always do little thoughtful things for my mom, like buy her favorite candy bar at the grocery store just because mom liked it. Buy her some flowers for no reason at all.

What did watching this for 35 years do for me? Raise the bar really bloody high I prefer the idea of doing kind thoughtful things for the ones you love rather than some traditionally romantic thing. But really, I am kind of a cynic, or as Boo might say, a realist when it comes to relationships. The little things matter more than the grand gestures.

there is a technique to giving small gifts and other unobstrusive displays of affection... an old girlfriend years ago was very skilled in this regard and I couldn't keep up. I remember her with her arms folded on a number of occasions saying grimly 'yer not very romantic'. I sez 'ain't the fact that we are together and that I don't want anyone but you enough to demonstrate that you have captured my heart?' she was never convinced...

even now with my beloved wife I don't know what to buy as she never likes the gifts that I give her and will exchange them for something else (including cash) if possible...can't win fer losin'... I have become corrupted and now view gift giving as bribery...I have a vicious sister-in-law that hates my wife but I give her little gifts (a Zippo and nice tobacco from the duty free) so that she will be nice to me and not cause trouble...she then holds them up triumphantly in the wife's face who then turns me a withering glance to indicate 'you fcuked up again'...once again, can't win fer losin'...

I have a beautiful, intelligent 14 y.o. niece that I want to groom fer university that is receptive to my attention but I think that's her hormones talkin' cause no one else acknowleges her existence...can't win fer losin'

she's been 14 for as long as I've been on the forum....

get outta here, clown; that one is now 18 and married and she was always too hard edged and practical to be university material...she's a nice lookin' girl and she likes her uncle tutsi a lot as I intervened when she fcuked up bigtime some years ago (stole her grandmother's cash and ran off). Despite having married twice she controls her reproduction...she knows that she's not ready fer kids...a remarkable accomplishment for an uneducated country girl...

btw: what do thai folks think about when they think about romance?...and how applicable is the falang version in this regard? I never had a romantic prelude with my wife; we just hung around together, discussed what we would like to have from each other, made the deal and that was it. It was a risk that I was willing to take and it paid off...after almost ten years together we've developed a relationship sustaining mutual respect and she's still one of the sexiest women I've been with. But maybe I was lucky.

so...what sort of response would you expect from a thai if you were to ask 'Are you a Romantic'?

she's been 14 for as long as I've been on the forum....

actually, this one is the girl who, when she was ten, embarrased me at the swimming pool at the Rembrant; I was trying to entice her with coke an' ice cream to get in the water and get it over with as the tourists were giving me the evil eye (fat, middle aged falang with an underaged girl) she knew what was happenin' and was lovin' it...she succeeded in demonstating that she is smart but more importantly we bonded and she has always been special since that day...

now she is 14 y.o.; tall, lithe and serious...wanna get that girl inta university then marry some rich bastard and help support me an' her aunt when we are old...someone's gotta pay fer the vodka ten years from now...

sounds mercenary, I know, but if any rich bastard was to make her sad his gibbeted rich bastard's guts would later be on display on the Rama bridge...

In answer to the OP - No. Some people are, some people play the game (pretend they are from time-to-time) and some people simply are not and probably never have been.

It doesn't mean I don't cherish and look after them, but nice little surprise treats (flowers, chocolates on 'why not?' occasions) rarely happen.

My sister married an older man who's probably the most unromantic guy I've ever met.

To my knowledge he's never bought her a present... from the day they married he's never had a cent in his pocket that he hasn't had to ask her for, she controlled all the finances including his salary.

Having said that, they've had more than 30 years of good marriage... successful kids, both happy in their careers and now a quality retirement.

He's just not romantic. (I asked her what he did for Valentine's Day this year and she's still laughing).

when it comes to relationships. The little things matter more than the grand gestures.

I totally agree! For me its not about buying some gift or making a big fuss. But i do admit i like it if I receive something small, like a chocolate bar (especially if its one that i really like, because I realise that he noticed something small like that). Makes me feel thought about, esp if im not around. I like to do the same in return. Small gestures of affection. Such as making sure i get in his favorite drink and its chilling in the fridge for him. I think small things like that make a person feel good. I like the occasional bigger things of course too, but again, i dont mean gifts or flamboyant gestures. For me a bigger thing can just be making time for me. I think making time for someone can be much bigger than receiving a gift. For example, when a person says, today is your day, we do what you want to do, even if that thing is something simple like taking a walk somewhere together or drinking a coffee and watching the world go by. I suppose that sounds a bit corny, but I appreciate small gestures like that, more than candles and flowers. For me that constitutes romance. I dont think romance can be bought and payed for, its about treasuring moments together, even if very simple ones.

I'll take the 5th Amendment on this one

In the Chinese calendar I was born in the year of the rat (fire rat) and the month of the rat, at the hour of the rat.

I am therefore practical and hard-working to the nth degree.

Also played rugby for more than fifty years.

So talk about Wasps or Baba tours and I can wax lyrical, but apart from that - not really understand what this romantic stuff is all about.

(Check with my wife - the current one, that is)

she's been 14 for as long as I've been on the forum....

get outta here, clown; that one is now 18 and married and she was always too hard edged and practical to be university material...she's a nice lookin' girl and she likes her uncle tutsi a lot as I intervened when she fcuked up bigtime some years ago (stole her grandmother's cash and ran off). Despite having married twice she controls her reproduction...she knows that she's not ready fer kids...a remarkable accomplishment for an uneducated country girl...

I've been drinkin' an' gotta write sumpin' so I'll use the foregoing to tell another story...this niece came back for another visit (thought that I wouldn't see her again until my next trip home) and the wife sez 'get outta bed she's wantin' to see ye...' an' I looked to see her chopping veges on the counter in our magnificent outdoor kitchen on our magnificent rear terrace. She had her hair pinned up and her back to me and I came up behind and grabbed a handful of denim shorts and gave her neck a nibble...her shoulders went limp and I thought 'oh, <deleted>' and stood back thinkin' she's got the wrong idea. She turned her head around slowly and then was genuinely surprised and delighted to see her uncle tutsi in his underwear and still drunk from the night before havin' just got outta bed.

The limp shoulders and slight head movement is what you expect from a lover in the right circumstances...my niece probably thought it was her husband who was also visiting...

I said jeezuz, I gotta be more careful...

My sister married an older man who's probably the most unromantic guy I've ever met.

To my knowledge he's never bought her a present... from the day they married he's never had a cent in his pocket that he hasn't had to ask her for, she controlled all the finances including his salary.

Having said that, they've had more than 30 years of good marriage... successful kids, both happy in their careers and now a quality retirement.

He's just not romantic. (I asked her what he did for Valentine's Day this year and she's still laughing).

who or what is Valentine's Day?

who or what is Valentine's Day?

I think it's a celebration for some sort of lubricant.

It's SAINT Valentine's Day.

The patron saint of Las Vegas.

this thread's gettin' deep.

Saint Valentine, the patron saint of florists.

who or what is Valentine's Day?

I think it's a celebration for some sort of lubricant.

The patron saint of lubricant?!?

Bah!

Us ladies know that inside the big he-man exterior the must be a real soffty. full of fluffyness.. Like Keanu.

Bah!

Humbug?

Bah!

look out...one of my nieces is called Bah (or is that Pah?)

I have an Ok, two Ells, an En, a Fai and a Nok.

Ok's father is Pah.

Sorry, I forgot Boom-bin. (No jokes please).

Couldn't agree more about Valentine's Day; just another totally contrived monument to conspicuous consumption. Rather like Christmas, in fact. Or as Will Self calls it, Consumermas.

I tend to favour the "little and often" approach. Yes, I love to buy daft little things for her in a totally impulsive way. But you can say just as much with the brush of a hand across the shoulders whilst walking past, a hug for no reason other than hugs feel lovely, an "I love you" because, after all, you do and, hopefully, that's why you married her in the first place.