You take your shoes off to go into your townhouse, then park the car/motorbike in there at night.

You consider it normal to eat everything with a spoon and can even cut your steak with it.

You never look anywhere but straight ahead when exiting a doorway onto a sidewalk.

You complain that the Som-Tam isn't spicy enough.

When you're not the least concerned when the taxi moto-cy you're riding crosses over into the oncoming lane in the path of a bus.

When a three day old dead fish looks appetizing.

When you take pleasure in letting a door close before the next person gets there.

When you can take ten minutes making an ATM withdrawal:...and then pull out another card and do it all over again.

Sounds like me , :jap:

Thanks to all you 'non conformists' out there for taking time to be part of this thread. It's been a blast.

Tumtong

You stop dressing smart and now look a parafin lamp

... when you start to support Liverpool or ManU

When your Thai wife becomes more frustrated with the above-mentioned than you are!

The recent influx of back-packing bloggers to Bangkok makes me think ..you know you HAVEN'T been in Thailand long enough when you say "back home' in every other sentence

You know you've been in Thailand too long ....

when you start whistling yourself into your own car park.

when you start thinking all the katoeys at Central Chidlom cosmetic department are girls and

all the girls at the bar are katoeys.

when you start thinking after waiting in a taxi for 45 minutes to go 1/2 km. ...you know the traffic is not so bad today.

The family sleep/lay in bed until 1300 on a national holiday, wake up, sh.t shower, etc and ask if you want to go shopping at the mall. You have been here too long, when you agree to go.

You can walk into a house stepping out of your flip-flops without breaking stride.

When all locals automatically speak to you in Thai - even they they have never met you.

or

You barge into a 711 and demand 12call 50 baht while other people are paying

or

You think nothing of wearing a suit, black socks and flip flops.

You visit friends for only half an hour so you leave the pick-up's engine running.

You watch Thai TV lakorns and think they're really good.

You use your lips to point.

.....when you find yourself browsing through thaivisa's general forum for no good reason whatsoever.....

When everything in Thailand just seems normal & you start to notice all the funny things that people do in your home country.

Like paddock bashing, burnout competition, cow tipping, beach cricket, sunburning.....

I need subtitles for the ozzie posts.

When seeing ants on the table is normal

When seeing a dog asleep in the middle of the road and everyone going round it is normal

When avioding dog turds on the footpath is normal

When having to avoid motorbikes in a crowded market is normal

When you stop reading You Know You'Ve Been Too Long In Thailand When... threads.

When every conversation you have concerns money or food

When loud music is considered normal

When the shop assistant follows you around the shop and you don’t feel uncomfortable

When you think all thai men are hard working

When people stop asking for money, drinks or other donations

When people stop asking what’s your name and where you come from

When KFC is considered fine dining

When having Truevisions is considered the pinnacle of TV programming

When being waved through a police check point is considered as saving money

When lost and don’t bother asking for directions

When you understand the importance of money

Quote; "When you can take ten minutes making an ATM withdrawal:...and then pull out another card and do it all over again." I just got angry reading that, why oh why does this happen every time to me?

You know you've been in Thailand too long when...

You think is absolutely normal for the checkout boy at Lotus to be wearing full make-up

You drive into the right hand lane of a two-way street before you turn right.

You didn't know your motorbike had indicators and don't know what they're for

You never look in your rear view mirror unless you have a spot that needs attention

You don't turn your headlights on at night to save money... you don't need them anyway as you have many amulets

You find it weird to see someone let their dog inside the house

You know you can't ask the teacher when the kids break up from school. A. You don't ask questions. B. She wouldn't know anyway.

You think it's normal for the teacher to say "No school tomorrow!" at any given time

You're surprised when things work but not shocked when they don't

You stop walking to the shop to buy beer because it's 50 metres away and the motorbike's quicker

Then you stop taking the bike and send a 7 year old..

You use 20 baht petrol to save 10 baht on a product

You can listen to distorted music all day long

Being called farang doesn't bother you anymore

You're surprised when you can still watch TV when it's raining

The 6am loud-speakers don't wake you up anymore

It's better saying you fully understand when you haven't got a clue

Honestly this isn't a rant. I love it here really

You buy a 50" TV and take it home on a motorbike taxi.

you sometimes wash your hands and face over the roadside with a water bottle....

you calculate whether you will be able to do something without saying anything, if so you are more likely to do it.......

you realize that is is possible to become a Thai citizen as a farang........

when you look into the mirror and realise: your blond hair is black now, your blue eyes are brown, no body hair, your body shrinked 30cm, you can't understand anything except Thai, eat anything than spicy Thai food, hate hot weather, don't understand TV except jealous soap operas and be happy with that.

You forgot to add

When you start believing it, when people start telling you stil look young.

When you start believing the rear view mirror in the car is actually a makeup accessory.

When you feel like puking still agree that the food was fantastic.

When your toenails are longer than your toes.

When you rent a building believing that if you live there for the specified length of the contract you will actually receive your deposit back.

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When you don't beleive a word that comes out of anyones mouth even if it is a woof from your dog

fantastic post by the way hilarious

when you start staring back at people

when you start staring back at people

when you mention the 'farang' to your friend as he or she walks past....

When you speak Thai to your farang mates... and they reply in Thai...

(are you hungry/thirsty/one more/go where?)

When you start dreaming about being moved to an inactive post at work.

When you understand all the English slogans and tub subs.

In trend....try the real shopping...more to dine..... try to good taste....the brightening synergy of oxygen....

Pluck your eyebrows then tattoo them back on.

When you can't speak English but can say words like a PhD.Medical student learnt from the drinks section in the 7-11.

collagen..co enzymes q10..chlorophyll..betamine..vitamins...fiber..magnesium..niacin..

My personal favourite... BCAA ( Branched-Chain Amino Acid), L-carnitine = from the front of the B-ing drink.