Bought Your Wife! Your Response?

[garyh]

I bought my wife according to her. It's sortof what sinsot is all about.

Quote ... You buy my life, I must stay with you .........

If she says it, why shouldn't someone else. What does your wife say?

A day before our marriage, the soon to be Mrs T informs me of this 'sinsot' thing.

"You have to give some money to my mother," she said matter of factly. In India, it's the guy that gets the dowry. In Hong Kong, at least before the 1970's, it was customary for the man to give his prospective mother in law a dowry. In any case, the news didn't faze me.

"I only have 25,000 baht," I said. She took 20k and said, "that'll do."

I find out years later that she had added 80k of her own money and given her mom a 100k as a token sinsot, saying it was from me.

So it appears I own only one fifth of Mrs T.

T

Sounds like Mrs T is well worth the 20 K.

[IanForbes]

What difference will it make if you meet your gf, wife, in a bar in Thailand, Europe, North America, or Russia? People meet in bars, church, coffee shops, school, etc and may even bump into each other on the foot path. Its the quality of the product that matters not if it were found at Sears, Walmart or Harrods. The people who find the old master painting in a pawn shop have nothing to justify or explain, to those who received theirs thru the world famous auction houses. both have found a work of art that others, either accept, detest, or envy.

Excellent post, slapout. I couldn't have said it any better. Of course that doesn't excuse a man for being an ignorant boor and commenting on another man's wife or girl friend. I wouldn't get defensive, but I would make a fool out of him in front of others.

[mahtin]

Give a man an internet forum, and if he is a fool the whole world will soon know it.

Isn't anonymity nice?

[philw]

An old time bar-owner in Chiang Mai used to tell everyone how he'd gone to a village where he'd never been before. They trotted out all the single women who stood in line and he'd pointed to one and  paid cash on the barrel-head for his wife. 

They were together for years and had a lovely daughter. Eventually she left him for a younger man, but I can not say that I blamed her. 

What a load of rubish.

It's bullshit stories like this that gives Thailand a bad name!

I think your "old' time bar owner" mate has had a few too many in his time  

Sorry, but I'm pretty sure that it is true (at least the part about buying her). It was more than 20 years ago however and he was not my "mate". 

Am I right in suspecting a connection to the long defunct "Love Birds" bar here ??

ph

[Samuian]

yeah, yea, yeah..... can't buy me looooooovee.. can't buy me...

doesn't matter what other people think ans say, if it's alright and works well a big thumbs up, BUT somehow certain origins have trouble build in, at no extra charge!

[rocketmanbkk]

If you are a guy with a Thai wife then no problems.

If you are a guy with a wife who is young enough to be your daughter then why is sh ewith you an dcommenst will always be made.

Ask yourself this, why would a 20 something lovely Thai lady want to be with a 40/50/60+ something western guy? it has been said before an dwill be said many times in the future.

I won't post teh answer to the question as if you don't know an dyou are one of these guys then you are living in an unreal world.

Good luck to all those of you have Thai wives (including me, I am 39, my wife is 36).

But if peopel are saying you'bought' you wife and you are alot older than her then why do you think thay are asking?

[TheLaughingMan]

At a party, the Director of the USIS Center once asked me if I met my wife at a bar. I could have done a few nasty things to that person....

I think I can beat that. I was selling the house and showing this couple around. We were at the top of the stairs and she asked me why i was selling. So I told her I wanted to go and live in Thailand...." Before I could add to be with my wife. She interupted and said "Why are you going there? For the Paedophillia." It took all my self control not to push her down those bloody stairs.

Do western women or westerners in general have turrets and just blurt out any old thing that crosses thier minds? Unbelievable.

[Thakkar]

I bought my wife according to her. It's sortof what sinsot is all about.

Quote ... You buy my life, I must stay with you .........

If she says it, why shouldn't someone else. What does your wife say?

A day before our marriage, the soon to be Mrs T informs me of this 'sinsot' thing.

"You have to give some money to my mother," she said matter of factly. In India, it's the guy that gets the dowry. In Hong Kong, at least before the 1970's, it was customary for the man to give his prospective mother in law a dowry. In any case, the news didn't faze me.

"I only have 25,000 baht," I said. She took 20k and said, "that'll do."

I find out years later that she had added 80k of her own money and given her mom a 100k as a token sinsot, saying it was from me.

So it appears I own only one fifth of Mrs T.

T

Sounds like Mrs T is well worth the 20 K.

Not really. The Baht today is weaker than it was eighteen years ago, so she's worth 30% less in Dollar terms.

[Ulysses G.]

An old time bar-owner in Chiang Mai used to tell everyone how he'd gone to a village where he'd never been before. They trotted out all the single women who stood in line and he'd pointed to one and  paid cash on the barrel-head for his wife. 

They were together for years and had a lovely daughter. Eventually she left him for a younger man, but I can not say that I blamed her. 

What a load of rubish.

It's bullshit stories like this that gives Thailand a bad name!

I think your "old' time bar owner" mate has had a few too many in his time  

Sorry, but I'm pretty sure that it is true (at least the part about buying her). It was more than 20 years ago however and he was not my "mate". 

Am I right in suspecting a connection to the long defunct "Love Birds" bar here ??

ph

I suspect that you are correct, but it had a different name by the time that I used to go there. 

[mca]

Folks on here could always answer " Well if you bought yours I hope you kept the receipt."

[Valdezugar]

Response: Yea I paid good money for her. See that nice ass? Doesn't come cheap :-)

[Mosha]

Same as Tescos buy one get one free

[MiG16]

to the OP, if it were me, I would give my most polite smile (usually reserved for people I think are not worth my time or arguing with), and then wish the guy luck and remind him not to forget to fill up his private jet with all his cash, gold and preferably diamonds?

(stocks not accepted, too much fluctuation)

[somtampet]

What difference will it make if you meet your gf, wife, in a bar in Thailand, Europe, North America, or Russia? People meet in bars, church, coffee shops, school, etc and may even bump into each other on the foot path. Its the quality of the product that matters not if it were found at Sears, Walmart or Harrods. The people who find the old master painting in a pawn shop have nothing to justify or explain, to those who received theirs thru the world famous auction houses. both have found a work of art that others, either accept, detest, or envy.

Of course it is different, if you meet a girl in a bar in Thailand and she is working there there is a higher chance of it being about money then if you meet your Thai girl in school or whatever. Sure there are always exceptions but those are few and far between.

Its harder to find good quality flea market then it is to find it at higher up place. But yes it is possible to find good quality everywhere, but your just reducing your chances by looking in the wrong spots.

Not sure i agree with you on that Rob.I know of teachers,real estate owners,business women who are all stitching their farang husbands up,especialy the thai man living with them when he is away,and they boast about it.

[gburns57au]

At a party, the Director of the USIS Center once asked me if I met my wife at a bar. I could have done a few nasty things to that person....

Why?.....dont you meet farang women in bars??

[gburns57au]

My response to the original comment would be....

Yep and I got a bloody good bargain.

People say things to get a reaction.....dont give them the reaction they expect.....stuffs them every time

[mark45y]

If you are a guy with a Thai wife then no problems.

If you are a guy with a wife who is young enough to be your daughter then why is sh ewith you an dcommenst will always be made.

Ask yourself this, why would a 20 something lovely Thai lady want to be with a 40/50/60+ something western guy? it has been said before an dwill be said many times in the future.

I won't post teh answer to the question as if you don't know an dyou are one of these guys then you are living in an unreal world.

Good luck to all those of you have Thai wives (including me, I am 39, my wife is 36).

But if peopel are saying you'bought' you wife and you are alot older than her then why do you think thay are asking?

Look at it from the other side of the coin.

My friend Sam is old and fat and ugly. He was a fish monger in Boston for years.

He saved his money. He now lives in Thailand. He will live here till he dies.

Not only did he buy (sin sot) his wife, he thought it was a blue light special and he bought a bunch of them. You can do that here with village ceremonies.

He lives in Chiang Mai, Bangkok and another place. He has a wife and home in each place.

Sam leases all his homes from one Thai guy who he bankrolled as a developer. Sam owns the company Treaty of Amity or something like that.

He tells his families that he has business and lives with each family for three months. For the remaining three months he lives in Pattaya and plays around.

He is 65 and all his wives are between the ages of 18 and 22 that he met in bars. They are all beautiful. Except of course for his American wife who divorced him thinking he had no money and was tired of waiting for a payoff.

Sam had a unique way of saving money, fascinating actually which is why I know him.

But that’s another story.

He upsets western women for obvious reasons.

But why does Sam upset normal guys who come to Thailand and marry normal women.

Is it because if his one of his wives does something he doesn’t like he gets a different one?

Is it because in addition to his wives he plays around?

I realize reading your post that you give off negative vibrations towards old men with young wives. You don’t like it. It bothers you.

Why would it bother you?

[F1fanatic]

If you are a guy with a Thai wife then no problems.

If you are a guy with a wife who is young enough to be your daughter then why is sh ewith you an dcommenst will always be made.

Ask yourself this, why would a 20 something lovely Thai lady want to be with a 40/50/60+ something western guy? it has been said before an dwill be said many times in the future.

I won't post teh answer to the question as if you don't know an dyou are one of these guys then you are living in an unreal world.

Good luck to all those of you have Thai wives (including me, I am 39, my wife is 36).

But if peopel are saying you'bought' you wife and you are alot older than her then why do you think thay are asking?

Look at it from the other side of the coin.

My friend Sam is old and fat and ugly. He was a fish monger in Boston for years.

He saved his money. He now lives in Thailand. He will live here till he dies.

Not only did he buy (sin sot) his wife, he thought it was a blue light special and he bought a bunch of them. You can do that here with village ceremonies.

He lives in Chiang Mai, Bangkok and another place. He has a wife and home in each place.

Sam leases all his homes from one Thai guy who he bankrolled as a developer. Sam owns the company Treaty of Amity or something like that.

He tells his families that he has business and lives with each family for three months. For the remaining three months he lives in Pattaya and plays around.

He is 65 and all his wives are between the ages of 18 and 22 that he met in bars. They are all beautiful. Except of course for his American wife who divorced him thinking he had no money and was tired of waiting for a payoff.

Sam had a unique way of saving money, fascinating actually which is why I know him.

But that's another story.

He upsets western women for obvious reasons.

But why does Sam upset normal guys who come to Thailand and marry normal women.

Is it because if his one of his wives does something he doesn't like he gets a different one?

Is it because in addition to his wives he plays around?

I realize reading your post that you give off negative vibrations towards old men with young wives. You don't like it. It bothers you.

Why would it bother you?

It will obviously come as a shock to you, but old men with young wives revolt most Westerners - OUR culture tells us that we marry for love.

Most won't actually be rude enough to say anything.

[NanLaew]

An old time bar-owner in Chiang Mai used to tell everyone how he'd gone to a village where he'd never been before. They trotted out all the single women who stood in line and he'd pointed to one and  paid cash on the barrel-head for his wife. 

They were together for years and had a lovely daughter. Eventually she left him for a younger man, but I can not say that I blamed her. 

What a load of rubish.

It's bullshit stories like this that gives Thailand a bad name!

I think your "old' time bar owner" mate has had a few too many in his time

Not so far fetched. I do have a Canadian buddy who has twice gone up country and taken a 'farm fresh' girl for his wife. When the first one became more 'worldly', he terminated the relationship, took in a few years of bachelorhood before getting the second wife. She is also now history and he is having his self-admitted 'final fling' in his twilight years and will doubtless settle with another young lady to take care of him in his dotage.

PS. Read my tagline....

[cardholder]

An old time bar-owner in Chiang Mai used to tell everyone how he'd gone to a village where he'd never been before. They trotted out all the single women who stood in line and he'd pointed to one and paid cash on the barrel-head for his wife.

They were together for years and had a lovely daughter. Eventually she left him for a younger man, but I can not say that I blamed her.

What a load of rubish.

It's bullshit stories like this that gives Thailand a bad name!

I think your "old' time bar owner" mate has had a few too many in his time

Not so far fetched. I do have a Canadian buddy who has twice gone up country and taken a 'farm fresh' girl for his wife. When the first one became more 'worldly', he terminated the relationship, took in a few years of bachelorhood before getting the second wife. She is also now history and he is having his self-admitted 'final fling' in his twilight years and will doubtless settle with another young lady to take care of him in his dotage.

PS. Read my tagline....

I was once in a village the day before a friends wedding. The groom and I were wandering through the village (his bride to be and my g/f were helping the family) when a Thai woman stopped and talked to us. Within 5 minutes she had got her 2 daughters (both aged early 20's) in front of us and made it quite clear that they were both available for a suitable financial consideration.

In direct response to the OP's question, my reply would be "A lot less than either of my English wives"

[Kilgore Trout]

I bought my wife according to her. It's sortof what sinsot is all about.

Quote ... You buy my life, I must stay with you .........

If she says it, why shouldn't someone else. What does your wife say?

Clearly your wife is uneducated. Ask an educated Thai what sin sod is all about, I might suggest.

[Foggy Dew]

I know I cannot change the automatic assumption in some quarters that if you have a Thai wife that you got her in a bar or by mail order. Some people believe all Irish are drunks and all Scots are tight with money etc. That’s life.

But what gives them the right to insult both of us by jokingly saying that “I bought my wife” in my company?

My original question still stands, how do you reply / react to such an insult?

[cardholder]

I bought my wife according to her. It's sortof what sinsot is all about.

Quote ... You buy my life, I must stay with you .........

If she says it, why shouldn't someone else. What does your wife say?

Clearly your wife is uneducated. Ask an educated Thai what sin sod is all about, I might suggest.

I would also suggest that the divorce/separation rates in Thailand do not support the "I must stay with you" theory.

[robblok]

What difference will it make if you meet your gf, wife, in a bar in Thailand, Europe, North America, or Russia? People meet in bars, church, coffee shops, school, etc and may even bump into each other on the foot path. Its the quality of the product that matters not if it were found at Sears, Walmart or Harrods. The people who find the old master painting in a pawn shop have nothing to justify or explain, to those who received theirs thru the world famous auction houses. both have found a work of art that others, either accept, detest, or envy.

Of course it is different, if you meet a girl in a bar in Thailand and she is working there there is a higher chance of it being about money then if you meet your Thai girl in school or whatever. Sure there are always exceptions but those are few and far between.

Its harder to find good quality flea market then it is to find it at higher up place. But yes it is possible to find good quality everywhere, but your just reducing your chances by looking in the wrong spots.

Not sure i agree with you on that Rob.I know of teachers,real estate owners,business women who are all stitching their farang husbands up,especialy the thai man living with them when he is away,and they boast about it.

If you think that and it makes you happy then believe that. But realistically you got more chance getting stitched up by a (ex)bar girl.

[rocketmanbkk]

If you are a guy with a Thai wife then no problems.

If you are a guy with a wife who is young enough to be your daughter then why is sh ewith you an dcommenst will always be made.

Ask yourself this, why would a 20 something lovely Thai lady want to be with a 40/50/60+ something western guy? it has been said before an dwill be said many times in the future.

I won't post teh answer to the question as if you don't know an dyou are one of these guys then you are living in an unreal world.

Good luck to all those of you have Thai wives (including me, I am 39, my wife is 36).

But if peopel are saying you'bought' you wife and you are alot older than her then why do you think thay are asking?

Look at it from the other side of the coin.

My friend Sam is old and fat and ugly. He was a fish monger in Boston for years.

He saved his money. He now lives in Thailand. He will live here till he dies.

Not only did he buy (sin sot) his wife, he thought it was a blue light special and he bought a bunch of them. You can do that here with village ceremonies.

He lives in Chiang Mai, Bangkok and another place. He has a wife and home in each place.

Sam leases all his homes from one Thai guy who he bankrolled as a developer. Sam owns the company Treaty of Amity or something like that.

He tells his families that he has business and lives with each family for three months. For the remaining three months he lives in Pattaya and plays around.

He is 65 and all his wives are between the ages of 18 and 22 that he met in bars. They are all beautiful. Except of course for his American wife who divorced him thinking he had no money and was tired of waiting for a payoff.

Sam had a unique way of saving money, fascinating actually which is why I know him.

But that's another story.

He upsets western women for obvious reasons.

But why does Sam upset normal guys who come to Thailand and marry normal women.

Is it because if his one of his wives does something he doesn't like he gets a different one?

Is it because in addition to his wives he plays around?

I realize reading your post that you give off negative vibrations towards old men with young wives. You don't like it. It bothers you.

Why would it bother you?

It doesn't bother me but the OP I guess it does bother.

I was pointing out a fact.

As someone else stated it is not the norm for an 'older' western guy to marry a 'younger' lady.

As this happens alot in Thailand the guy, if he is alot older than his little wife needs to take comments on the chin and not be bothered about it, as someone also said, loads of people will think it but not so many have the bottle to say it.

if you don't want negative questions asked or to be spoken about behind yor back don't marry an asian lady young enough to be your daughter or grand daughter.

simple as that!

I say good luck to the guys who are punching above their weight in the ladies field, I hope it doesn't all come crashing down and you lose more then just face.

Good luck to us all.

[GreenSnapper]

I realize reading your post that you give off negative vibrations towards old men with young wives. You don’t like it. It bothers you.

Why would it bother you?

These sort of comments you read here are based on insecurity, lack of experience with women, and little knowledge on female psychology.

[shadiadi]

Dad and his son are fishing, Son asks his Dad how much does it cost to get married? Dad turns round to the son and says I haven't got a clue I haven't finished paying yet!

[garyh]

I know I cannot change the automatic assumption in some quarters that if you have a Thai wife that you got her in a bar or by mail order. Some people believe all Irish are drunks and all Scots are tight with money etc. That's life.

But what gives them the right to insult both of us by jokingly saying that "I bought my wife" in my company?

My original question still stands, how do you reply / react to such an insult?

What's the cost of a farang wife these days?

Or

You pay by the kilo, so only cost half as much as your wife would.

[endure]

"

Hi All,

Today while in conversation with two other men both in their late 50s, one said to the other that he should go to Thailand and buy a wife like me!

In 4 years living here in Ireland with my wife I have never had anything negative said to me before.

I was shocked and let him know in no uncertain terms that kind of talk was not acceptable. However I was not prepared and didn’t know how to respond properly, somewhere between totally ignoring the comment and kicking the sh1t out him.

How do you / would you react?

Foggy

"

Why would you be concerned about what strangers think about you? You don't know them. You have no obligations to them. Their opinions are completely irrelevant.

Edited June 28, 2010 by endure

[radioguy1450]

anytime someone disrespects ur wife u have the right to punch him, this is an understanding between all gentlemen. i am not saying u have to slug the guy, but u are within your rights to do so.