Ok, loaded question! How in my face in the sex problems in Thailand?

[nicolas18]

Maybe Ms. Kanela could have better asked the question: How visible is the sex industry here in Thailand if one does not want to be confronted on a daily basis that such an industry exists?

Well, actually, I thought her question was pretty straight-forward. She never once asked anything about her husband/boyfriend/whatever, she just asked how visible the sex industry is.

[JLCrab]

Maybe Ms. Kanela could have better asked the question: How visible is the sex industry here in Thailand if one does not want to be confronted on a daily basis that such an industry exists?

Well, actually, I thought her question was pretty straight-forward. She never once asked anything about her husband/boyfriend/whatever, she just asked how visible the sex industry is.

Ms. K. categorized the situation as 'sex problems' which is why open season was declared by the rank-and-file.

[wym]

And to summarize (my version of) the collective wisdom here:

Not too badly visible, as long as

• you avoid those specific areas famous for putting it right out under your nose
• you keep your intuition in check and try to avoid jumping to conclusions about the many autumn/spring farang/TG couples you will encounter
• and you aren't worried about your husband sampling the local talent

All of which means in practice AFAIC:

you'd have to be a blind fool to not see it - far better to know what's going on but adopt "mai bpen rai" in your attitude towards it

[Loles]

Dear Kanela,

listen to me and you do stay home, do go to the church on Sundays, do pray every morning and evening and let your husband to live a bit.

You will be pretty crazy about sex in your face here (TH), and your husband also will be crazy about your chains cause he also wants some sex to his face.

Cambodia is a bit better cause the potential demand lives in TH mostly.

And who told is this "problem" as you call this situation here?

Anyway, yes this is always problem for aging wives but they are not welcome here by bar girls, western boyfriend hunter disco girls or western husband hunter working girls.

Something like that.

[Loles]

And to summarize (my version of) the collective wisdom here:

Not too badly visible, as long as

• you avoid those specific areas famous for putting it right out under your nose
• you keep your intuition in check and try to avoid jumping to conclusions about the many autumn/spring farang/TG couples you will encounter
• and you aren't worried about your husband sampling the local talent

All of which means in practice AFAIC:

you'd have to be a blind fool to not see it - far better to know what's going on but adopt "mai bpen rai" in your attitude towards it

And you avoid Thailand at all.

[Loles]

You must be Brittish ...

... and a bit ugly.

[Loles]

Please be humble and treat the newbie with a warm welcome..

During the day I doubt you'll see any bar girls, they usually only come out at night..

In Bangkok I suggest you stay away from Nana, Soi cowbow, and Sukhumvit area.

If you do come across these parts of town. My advice is try not to be so prejudice towards bar girls & have an open mind.

Not everyone is dealt with a winning hand in life

The OP"s husband and Chuck Norris say thanks for your useful instruction.

Please tell her also where can't go in Pattaya, Phuket, Chiangmai, Udon, etc ... just in case.

[Upnotover]

This must to be a BIG TROLL.

The OP has 61 posts here, but how comes ???

If some-one has never been in TH why has she a membership here?

I have never been in India and off course I have not a membership at all in indianvisa.com.

But all her posts are along similar lines, researching about potentially moving to Thailand. TV seems a reasonable place to get advice.

[Loles]

You will see prostitution massage places and small bars with girls all over and foreigners with young prostitutes are walking around everywhere.

But it's really easy to see and not think much more about it in the short term, because it appears very normal, not really like a hooker would look in the west.

That's for Chiang Mai, if you go south to Phuket, Pattaya or Bangkok it gets more obvious. Also, stay away from backpacker and tourist areas, get your own house away from apartments and condos if you can.

I'm sorry to say that over time It will be a factor in your stay here if it bothers you, and never altogether absent. More conservative countries include Laos and Vietnam.

Laos and Vietnam are not conservative countries my Dear, they are post-communist countries. Not same.

[Loles]

I believe the question you're really asking is, will your boyfriend leave you for a Thai girl, given all the offerings and distractions?

The answer is, it depends; on the well-being of your relationship, and where you choose to stay.

Stay out of the touristy areas in Bangkok / Chiang-Mai and you should generally be ok.

Actually I can clearly see that is what everyone thinks. I have not responded because this is not what the intent of my question was. I have no concerns about my husband. That is not what the question was about. The responses seem to have really gotten out of control. However it turned out to be quite the eye opener as to the quality of the foreigners in Thailand. Thank you for your advice.

Oh Dear, the quality foreigners in TH the Russian tourists. Didn't know ahh?

My advise you do ask Sergei and Vladimir at Pattaya.

It's 3 pm already, you may find them in bar, but please quickly cause at 4 pm they are already full drunk and useless.

[metisdead]

Posts calling the OP a troll have been removed. You people that call the OP a troll, you were a newbie at one time, were you called a troll in your early days of posting?

[HardenedSoul]

And, unfortunately, his money is going to be worth much, much more in Thailand, which will make him much more appealing to women much more attractive than Doris in Accounting -- remember her? The one who was past her sell-by date, wore too much make-up and clothes that were way too tight and revealing , but always laughed at your husband's jokes at the company parties.

Jesus!

Is this what happened to you with your husband?

OMG this is all to ridiculous!!

How so?

The way NancyL conjured up the detailed image of "Doris" the accounting department strumpet suggested it was from bitter personal experience.

Anyway, I'm not trying to be nasty but if, as I suspect, that IS a photo of you in your avatar and your marriage is anything less than solid, I'd respectfully reiterate the advice you've had from others and seriously ruminate on the wisdom of retiring to Thailand with your "hubby".

[nicolas18]

And, unfortunately, his money is going to be worth much, much more in Thailand, which will make him much more appealing to women much more attractive than Doris in Accounting -- remember her? The one who was past her sell-by date, wore too much make-up and clothes that were way too tight and revealing , but always laughed at your husband's jokes at the company parties.

Jesus!

Is this what happened to you with your husband?

OMG this is all to ridiculous!!

How so?

The way NancyL conjured up the detailed image of "Doris" the accounting department strumpet suggested it was from bitter personal experience.

Anyway, I'm not trying to be nasty but if, as I suspect, that IS a photo of you in your avatar and your marriage is anything less than solid, I'd respectfully reiterate the advice you've had from others and seriously ruminate on the wisdom of retiring to Thailand with your "hubby".

No need to get nasty, dude.... Maybe you should post a photo of yourself so we can also judge how attractive you are...

[rijb]

A better question might be ... "Why take a baloney sandwich to a banquet?"

[canman]

And, unfortunately, his money is going to be worth much, much more in Thailand, which will make him much more appealing to women much more attractive than Doris in Accounting -- remember her? The one who was past her sell-by date, wore too much make-up and clothes that were way too tight and revealing , but always laughed at your husband's jokes at the company parties.

Jesus!

Is this what happened to you with your husband?

OMG this is all to ridiculous!!

How so?

The way NancyL conjured up the detailed image of "Doris" the accounting department strumpet suggested it was from bitter personal experience.

Anyway, I'm not trying to be nasty but if, as I suspect, that IS a photo of you in your avatar and your marriage is anything less than solid, I'd respectfully reiterate the advice you've had from others and seriously ruminate on the wisdom of retiring to Thailand with your "hubby".

You do relaise she is likely the one in the middle right? A small pic but from what I can see Kanela looks a very attractive woman indeed.

[HardenedSoul]

OMG this is all to ridiculous!!

How so?

The way NancyL conjured up the detailed image of "Doris" the accounting department strumpet suggested it was from bitter personal experience.

Anyway, I'm not trying to be nasty but if, as I suspect, that IS a photo of you in your avatar and your marriage is anything less than solid, I'd respectfully reiterate the advice you've had from others and seriously ruminate on the wisdom of retiring to Thailand with your "hubby".

No need to get nasty, dude.... Maybe you should post a photo of yourself so we can also judge how attractive you are...

Who's being nasty? I'm just telling it like it is.

You do relaise she is likely the one in the middle right? A small pic but from what I can see Kanela looks a very attractive woman indeed.

No idea what you're talking about. The avatar I can see has one person in it and there is no face showing.

[metisdead]

A post containing profanity has been removed as well as the replies quoting the profanity post.

In using Thai Visa I agree:

1) To respect fellow members.

3) Not to post in a manner that is vulgar, obscene or profane.

4) Not to flame fellow members.Flaming will not be tolerated. 'Flaming' is defined as posting or responding to a message in a way clearly intended to incite useless arguments, to launch personal attacks, to insult, or to be hateful towards other members. This includes useless criticism, name-calling, swearing and any other comments meant to incite anger.

[FiftyTwo]

No idea what you're talking about. The avatar I can see has one person in it and there is no face showing.

Looks like a normal middle-aged western woman, competition here is tough and from much younger girls.

Danger, Kanala, danger!

[HardenedSoul]

Well this is what I see on my screen

[jacko45k]

Yes, everywhere you go, it cannot be avoided. Same as kangaroos roaming the streets in Sydney.

Surely there are places one can go and not have to deal with that sort of thing?

You are worried about kangaroos too?

Sorry, you were caught up in a little sarcasm/irony there.

It is IN YOUR FACE in some tourist areas, Patong Phuket, Nana Plaza, Cowboy or Patpong in Bangkok and Walking St, Soi LK Metro in Pattaya . But easy to be somewhere else where it is just not evident. Or even just out-of-town in the aforementioned areas. You need to have trust wrt the husband, or a liberal approach.

[kong1961]

For what’s it is worth unless you go looking for it the girls (Thailand) there, like in any Asian countries are very conservative. Staying about 5 hours from the nearest border town, I have made countless trips into Thailand just for the food, and have not been hassled by any pimps. If one does not make any eye contact with them than the will just ignore you, one thing about Asian people (in general) they do not make any eye contact unless you are interested in them.

[FiftyTwo]

For whats it is worth unless you go looking for it the girls (Thailand) there, like in any Asian countries are very conservative. Staying about 5 hours from the nearest border town, I have made countless trips into Thailand just for the food, and have not been hassled by any pimps. If one does not make any eye contact with them than the will just ignore you, one thing about Asian people (in general) they do not make any eye contact unless you are interested in them.

Thailand doesn't operate the pimp/hooker system that the western world understands.

There aren't any pimps for you to make eye contact with.

It seems you don't know anything about Thailand at all.

[NancyL]

Dear Hardened Soul:

I've never bothered to post a personal photo as an avatar and I suspect newbie Kanela will be changing hers after all the scrutiny it's receiving. However, I use a "handle" NancyL that makes my identity transparent to anyone familiar with the Chiang Mai expat scene, esp. when I talk about activities like organizing the Expats Ladies Lunches. I think your "handle" may describe your identity fairly well, also.

As for "Doris in Accounting" -- yes, we've all known someone like her. Gossiping about her and her exploits was a constant source of office entertainment. Certainly I've not had any "bitter personal experience" with a person like this. Those who know me would hardly characterize me as a bitter person; certainly my husband of 38 years wouldn't.

Edited January 28, 2014 by NancyL

[FiftyTwo]

Dear Hardened Soul:

I've never bothered to post a personal photo as an avatar and I suspect newbie Kanela will be changing hers after all the scrutiny it's receiving. However, I use a "handle" NancyL that makes my identity transparent to anyone familiar with the Chiang Mai expat scene, esp. when I talk about activities like organizing the Expats Ladies Lunches. I think your "handle" may describe your identity fairly well, also.

As for "Doris in Accounting" -- yes, we've all known someone like her. Gossiping about her and her exploits was a constant source of office entertainment. Certainly I've not had any "bitter personal experience" with a person like this. Those who know me would hardly characterize me as a bitter person; certainly my husband of 38 years wouldn't.

555

Your husband of 38 years wouldn't dare to voice any opinion on any subject without your permission.

[HardenedSoul]

Dear Hardened Soul:

I've never bothered to post a personal photo as an avatar and I suspect newbie Kanela will be changing hers after all the scrutiny it's receiving. However, I use a "handle" NancyL that makes my identity transparent to anyone familiar with the Chiang Mai expat scene, esp. when I talk about activities like organizing the Expats Ladies Lunches. I think your "handle" may describe your identity fairly well, also.

As for "Doris in Accounting" -- yes, we've all known someone like her. Gossiping about her and her exploits was a constant source of office entertainment. Certainly I've not had any "bitter personal experience" with a person like this. Those who know me would hardly characterize me as a bitter person; certainly my husband of 38 years wouldn't.

I don't recall having a dig at you; I just asked a simple question so what my "handle" does or doesn't represent or convey is irrelevant.

It's just a username - try not to read too much into it.

If you feel compelled to beat your chest triumphantly because - as far as you know - your "hubby" hasn't wet his "johnson" elsewhere, then go ahead, knock yourself out !

Edited January 28, 2014 by HardenedSoul

[NancyL]

Oh heavens no, I'd never make a claim that Hubby hasn't wet his "johnson" elsewhere -- that's something I can't claim with certainty, after all when you get right down it it, isn't it? The realistic claim is "not that I know of."

But, I can claim that he wouldn't describe me as a bitter person, like HardenedSoul did.

[FiftyTwo]

Oh heavens no, I'd never make a claim that Hubby hasn't wet his "johnson" elsewhere -- that's something I can't claim with certainty, after all when you get right down it it, isn't it? The realistic claim is "not that I know of."

But, I can claim that he wouldn't describe me as a bitter person, like HardenedSoul did.

Don't worry Nancy, HS describes anyone he doesn't agree with as "bitter".

I wouldn't describe you as "bitter", if that's any consolation.

Edited January 28, 2014 by FiftyTwo

[harrry]

I am sure you are not a bitter person NancyL and you do a fantastic job of helping people in ChiangMai (though I do fear hubby might have to say "Yes Dear" a bit often).

Your post here is realistic though possibly a bit direct. Which is fine as the original post was too.

Bars prostitutes and women exist in all towns. There is a difference here though Doris would probably expect and recieve some payment for what she does.

What does worry me is someone thinking of retiring in a place with a different language,culture and living standards far different to what they are used to without even coming here first and finding the truth for themselves.

Edited January 28, 2014 by harrry

[Mosha]

The largest customer base is local, but in most towns you won't even know it's there.

[Scarpolo]

I have been to Chiang Mai several times and described it and most of Thailand, as an "open air" xxxxxhouse,

I am from NYC,

does that solve your problem?

Thai people are not monogamous, and Thai women EXPECT their men, to get sex from the outside,

try and solve that riddle,

everything you have been told, is true,

it is all about sex for sale here, and incedibly, they all say they same thing, that they havent had a boyfriend, or sex, in years.

I'll echo the above, unless you choose to live near the tourist traps you'll never know, where do you anticipate residing?

After living in northern BKK for some years I only discovered we actually have a local knocking-shop when my wife pointed it out to me (why she chose to tell me I still don't know).

We thought we would start in Chiang Mai then later to Chanthaburi.

Edited January 28, 2014 by metisdead
Inappropriate language removed.