Thai "Blues"is it normal?

[spidermike007]

Travel alot. Get out of Pattaya as often as you can. The place is not the best of what Thailand has to offer. Get back to your home country for awhile. Amazing the amount of perspective I get from a month in the US. Above all surround yourself with people who are leading fulfilling lives.

[Franky Bear]

Travel alot. Get out of Pattaya as often as you can. The place is not the best of what Thailand has to offer. Get back to your home country for awhile. Amazing the amount of perspective I get from a month in the US. Above all surround yourself with people who are leading fulfilling lives.

This is as good advice you'll get. Straight to the point

Personally I don't travel much in Thailand as I travel with work so just like to come home and stay local. Which is Rayong, Pattaya Bkk.

Like most ex pats I "know"

Hundreds of people and faces but only have about 6/7 genuine friends I'd trust

[arthurwait]

The fact is this country has very little to do and a very low educated population. The only Thais I have met that can have a stimulating conversations were friends at university in England with me and some people they know and some my wife knows. They all themselves have left Thailand or live in Bangkok. Sure there are some more out there, but it seems most who get a decent education then spend their lives sitting in their parents business and that's pretty much it. You need to live on an estate with educated Thais or westerners or there is a high chance you will be mentally bored.

The country makes it hard for foreigners to work here as that would increase the countries intelligence which the rich don't want. They just want a population to do their dirty work on the cheap for them. Most people spend most their time working in their own country and enjoy themselves in their free time, but with no work or very little mental stimulation people get bored or down.

Pattaya maybe a bit of a grot hole , but it at least has some things to do and like minded people (no I don't live there). If you are bored there you will certainly be bored in the 'real' Thailand of Nakon Nowhere. Unless of course you like being permantly drunk, having conversations about Thai soaps and stars and going down the local karaoke bar for teenage girls and the odd waterfall. Mental stimulation .....no chance.

The foreigners who seem happiest all the time here mostly live in Bangkok and work or teach all day and mostly mix with other westerners in western bars etc and some educated Thais or those that are in their first year or so here.

[JLCrab]

As per the above, I use the same approach in rural Thailand that I used when living in rural USA:

If you didn't bring it, it ain't there.

[spidermike007]

The fact is this country has very little to do and a very low educated population. The only Thais I have met that can have a stimulating conversations were friends at university in England with me and some people they know and some my wife knows. They all themselves have left Thailand or live in Bangkok. Sure there are some more out there, but it seems most who get a decent education then spend their lives sitting in their parents business and that's pretty much it. You need to live on an estate with educated Thais or westerners or there is a high chance you will be mentally bored.

The country makes it hard for foreigners to work here as that would increase the countries intelligence which the rich don't want. They just want a population to do their dirty work on the cheap for them. Most people spend most their time working in their own country and enjoy themselves in their free time, but with no work or very little mental stimulation people get bored or down.

Pattaya maybe a bit of a grot hole , but it at least has some things to do and like minded people (no I don't live there). If you are bored there you will certainly be bored in the 'real' Thailand of Nakon Nowhere. Unless of course you like being permantly drunk, having conversations about Thai soaps and stars and going down the local karaoke bar for teenage girls and the odd waterfall. Mental stimulation .....no chance.

The foreigners who seem happiest all the time here mostly live in Bangkok and work or teach all day and mostly mix with other westerners in western bars etc and some educated Thais or those that are in their first year or so here.

Thanks for your thoroughly uplifting point of view. I seriously hope you do not live here, with that attitude. Have you tried any laxatives lately? They can do wonders to lift up the spirits.

[arthurwait]

The fact is this country has very little to do and a very low educated population. The only Thais I have met that can have a stimulating conversations were friends at university in England with me and some people they know and some my wife knows. They all themselves have left Thailand or live in Bangkok. Sure there are some more out there, but it seems most who get a decent education then spend their lives sitting in their parents business and that's pretty much it. You need to live on an estate with educated Thais or westerners or there is a high chance you will be mentally bored.

The country makes it hard for foreigners to work here as that would increase the countries intelligence which the rich don't want. They just want a population to do their dirty work on the cheap for them. Most people spend most their time working in their own country and enjoy themselves in their free time, but with no work or very little mental stimulation people get bored or down.

Pattaya maybe a bit of a grot hole , but it at least has some things to do and like minded people (no I don't live there). If you are bored there you will certainly be bored in the 'real' Thailand of Nakon Nowhere. Unless of course you like being permantly drunk, having conversations about Thai soaps and stars and going down the local karaoke bar for teenage girls and the odd waterfall. Mental stimulation .....no chance.

The foreigners who seem happiest all the time here mostly live in Bangkok and work or teach all day and mostly mix with other westerners in western bars etc and some educated Thais or those that are in their first year or so here.

Thanks for your thoroughly uplifting point of view. I seriously hope you do not live here, with that attitude. Have you tried any laxatives lately? They can do wonders to lift up the spirits.

The truth is the truth. Which part do you think isn't true ?

Here 7 years, only here for my kids.

[Gecko123]

The fact is this country has very little to do and a very low educated population. The only Thais I have met that can have a stimulating conversations were friends at university in England with me and some people they know and some my wife knows. They all themselves have left Thailand or live in Bangkok. Sure there are some more out there, but it seems most who get a decent education then spend their lives sitting in their parents business and that's pretty much it. You need to live on an estate with educated Thais or westerners or there is a high chance you will be mentally bored.

The country makes it hard for foreigners to work here as that would increase the countries intelligence which the rich don't want. They just want a population to do their dirty work on the cheap for them. Most people spend most their time working in their own country and enjoy themselves in their free time, but with no work or very little mental stimulation people get bored or down.

Pattaya maybe a bit of a grot hole , but it at least has some things to do and like minded people (no I don't live there). If you are bored there you will certainly be bored in the 'real' Thailand of Nakon Nowhere. Unless of course you like being permantly drunk, having conversations about Thai soaps and stars and going down the local karaoke bar for teenage girls and the odd waterfall. Mental stimulation .....no chance.

The foreigners who seem happiest all the time here mostly live in Bangkok and work or teach all day and mostly mix with other westerners in western bars etc and some educated Thais or those that are in their first year or so here.

Thanks for your thoroughly uplifting point of view. I seriously hope you do not live here, with that attitude. Have you tried any laxatives lately? They can do wonders to lift up the spirits.

The truth is the truth. Which part do you think isn't true ?

Here 7 years, only here for my kids.

Your post is riddled with sweepingly negative generalizations which very few people would agree with.

There is very little to do in Thailand.

Study Thai language, learn Thai cooking, study Thai art and architecture, travel, ride an elephant, go on a trek, swim, camp, garden, teach, exercise, read, start a business, volunteer, raise a family. Life is what you make it.

Thailand has a very low educated population. Sure, Thailand's educational system can be improved, no argument there. But to conclude from this that it is impossible to have a stimulating conversation with the "average" Thai is ridiculous, and I'll bet dollars to doughnuts that if you find having a stimulating conversation with a Thai impossible, it is because of the limitations of your language skills. I have discussed Greece, the Burmese boat people, child rearing issues just in the past week with my 'Nakhon Nowhere' neighbors. It is also ridiculous to complain about lack of mental stimulation in a given place when you consider how much of your "mental stimulation" nowadays comes from cable TV, internet, i-tunes, social media, Amazon books, etc., all of which are available universally.

The only Thais I have met that can have a stimulating conversations were friends at university in England with me and some people they know and some my wife knows.

Again, this says a lot about you. You're suggesting that the only Thais worth talking to have to be Western educated. An extremely cultural centric point of view, which overlooks the fact that there isn't a profession out there which isn't well-represented by Thais.

it seems most who get a decent education then spend their lives sitting in their parents business and that's pretty much it.

A stupid generalization. What about all the doctors, lawyers, dentists, engineers, accountants, entrepreneurs, etc? The fact that you seem to be referring to people who go into their parent's business shows how superficial your insights are. And another thing, when kids do go into the family business, where do you get off suggesting that they are just sitting around? Few Thai businesses are lucrative enough that they can support that kind of dead weight; everyone has to pull their own weight, and that usually means working 12 hour shifts 7 days a week.

You need to live on an estate with educated Thais or westerners or there is a high chance you will be mentally bored.

One of these gated communities, hermetically sealed off from everyday life? No thanks! That's the last place I'd head if I were looking for stimulation. Sounds like a recipe for either dementia or depression. I would be bored to tears in a gated community. No way, Jose!

The country makes it hard for foreigners to work here as that would increase the countries intelligence which the rich don't want.

Total B.S. The Thai government restricts foreign employment to provide employment opportunities to its citizens.

They (the rich) just want a population to do their dirty work on the cheap for them.

First of all, if you don't think that much the same can be said about income inequality in the West (which has dramatically worsened in the past 30 years) you are mistaken. My read on the situation is that Thailand is slowly transitioning from an agrarian economy to a more diversified one. I believe the Thai government is making genuine efforts to expand economic opportunites for people who otherwise would remain on the farm.

Pattaya maybe a bit of a grot hole , but it at least has some things to do and like minded people.

In all seriousness, and without taking a swipe at Pattaya and it's wonderful residents, are you seriously suggesting Pattaya as some shinning beacon where people seeking intellectual stimulation should head? With tongue in cheek, I can only say, 'who knew?' I always thought Pattaya was a place to go if you were looking for other forms of stimulation.

If you are bored there (Pattaya) you will certainly be bored in the 'real' Thailand of Nakon Nowhere. Unless of course you like being permantly drunk, having conversations about Thai soaps and stars and going down the local karaoke bar for teenage girls and the odd waterfall. Mental stimulation .....no chance.

First of all, probably 99% of the guys living outside of urban areas are family men. That is, they have a wife, usually a child or two, and usually some extended family. So they are frequently more socially established than someone (I know this doesn't apply to everyone) who is sitting on a bar stool at 9:30 in the morning. Not to say that nobody out in the countryside has a drinking problem. But, just using Pattaya as an example, the Central Pattaya lifestyle is primarily geared towards bar life. And what do you do in bar? You drink, smoke cigarettes, play pool, darts, watch football on TV, and oftentimes have essentially anonymous sex with sex workers. So if you want to compare the likelihood that someone living a family oriented active "clean living" "simple" lifestyle out in the country versus someone persuing the above directionless (albeit stereotype, but nonetheless true) lifestyle described above, I submit that you are more likely to encounter the blues in a locale like Pattaya than out in the country.

Most of the guys out in the country who are younger 50-55 also seem to work off-shore which adds to the stability of the upcountry lifestyle. Many are farmers or teach or are devoted parents. Everybody's boredom threshhold differs, but those who stay active, and have a sense of purpose, rarely give voice to complaints about boredom. They also seem to be fairly financially secure, at least not living from one SS check or pension payment to the next.

And as for this notion that all Thais want to talk about are i-phone apps, last night's soap opera plot, or the price of chicken feet at the market, all I have to say is work on your Thai and you will soon discover that Thais are a lot smarter and much more "mentally stimulating" conversationalists than you ever imagined. If the topic of conversation isn't to your liking, you can always bring up a topic which is more of interest to you.

In summary, life, no matter where you live, is what you make it. Dismissing a whole country and it's people as incapable of providing his lordship's requisite stimulation is just plain silly, and more than a little pretentious.

[spidermike007]

The fact is this country has very little to do and a very low educated population. The only Thais I have met that can have a stimulating conversations were friends at university in England with me and some people they know and some my wife knows. They all themselves have left Thailand or live in Bangkok. Sure there are some more out there, but it seems most who get a decent education then spend their lives sitting in their parents business and that's pretty much it. You need to live on an estate with educated Thais or westerners or there is a high chance you will be mentally bored.

The country makes it hard for foreigners to work here as that would increase the countries intelligence which the rich don't want. They just want a population to do their dirty work on the cheap for them. Most people spend most their time working in their own country and enjoy themselves in their free time, but with no work or very little mental stimulation people get bored or down.

Pattaya maybe a bit of a grot hole , but it at least has some things to do and like minded people (no I don't live there). If you are bored there you will certainly be bored in the 'real' Thailand of Nakon Nowhere. Unless of course you like being permantly drunk, having conversations about Thai soaps and stars and going down the local karaoke bar for teenage girls and the odd waterfall. Mental stimulation .....no chance.

The foreigners who seem happiest all the time here mostly live in Bangkok and work or teach all day and mostly mix with other westerners in western bars etc and some educated Thais or those that are in their first year or so here.

Thanks for your thoroughly uplifting point of view. I seriously hope you do not live here, with that attitude. Have you tried any laxatives lately? They can do wonders to lift up the spirits.

The truth is the truth. Which part do you think isn't true ?

Here 7 years, only here for my kids.

I am not doubting the extent of your misery here. I am only saying that there are things a man can do to improve his perspective on his life, and on his chosen place to live. Getting out of Pattaya often, and traveling around, with or without your family. Just get out. Change things up. Surround yourself with people who are not so down on life. A lot of options to improve your lot in life.

[benalibina]

Obviously Bakseeda doesn't either read the posts just prior to his blatant attempt to take this thread off topic, or he trying to wind me up personally.

Bakseeda If you wish to start a thread on the suicide or not of any unfortunate that has either been murdered or not please go and start it in a new thread started by yourself.

Your on topic comments are welcome by the OP if you stick to the topic.

Now if you have anything to offer with regard to the serious question in the OP I would like to hear it, otherwise............................?

Er you not a mod, you have posted in a public forum, ergo he can post what he likes provided it doesn't break the stated rules

if you have cause for objection, use the report button then..

And

I also have my point of view which is maybe a little more valid on the basis that I started this thread and I am whilst my point of view has been aired am not generally of the breed that would continually use the report button, especially when I can voice my own voice or opinion!

As for your imput on the thread you have no room to talk you are one of the most blatant takers of a post off topic on the forum.

As I previously said in some instances to diversify the topic can be helpful, talking about suicide in a thread where the focus was asking for help with coping strategies in a case of the "blues is decidedly, neither in line with the object of the topic or helpful in any way whatsoever but then again maybe the ability to empathise with the OP is not within either your or the other posters scope.

But then again the freedom to post unrelated and dubious helpful material is acceptable, just because you can eh?

Well it may be acceptable to you or any of the MODs but its not to me and that is why I made the comments I did on this free and open public forum!

Self reference ....the hardest thing to do for an emotional abuser (bully).....he is not even close to starting that process.....a pity.....for him.

[stickylies]

I come here when I miss Thailand and leave when I miss the homefront. Both fronts have pros and contras. What I "miss" here is a glass of Ricard and my jazz collection. What is miss there is a Leo-with-ice and my Honda Wave ;-)

[stickylies]

clueless/deranged/half wit/bigoted/whinging/bitter/emotionally broken

^^ hehe, AKA guys who tout themselves as "living the life"... ;-)

Edited July 5, 2015 by stickylies

[metisdead]

Off topic posts with no intent of addressing the topic (trolling) have been removed as well as some of the replies.

[ryanhull]

But , come on Ryan..... anywhere is better than 'ull... !

lol, less of it lad, the only place better than hull is scunthorpe

[arunsakda]

This thread is all about stages of "culture shock". Google it. Just picking up and going home will result in another stage called reverse culture shock. Dealing with this is a process..

Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

[spidermike007]

The fact is this country has very little to do and a very low educated population. The only Thais I have met that can have a stimulating conversations were friends at university in England with me and some people they know and some my wife knows. They all themselves have left Thailand or live in Bangkok. Sure there are some more out there, but it seems most who get a decent education then spend their lives sitting in their parents business and that's pretty much it. You need to live on an estate with educated Thais or westerners or there is a high chance you will be mentally bored.

The country makes it hard for foreigners to work here as that would increase the countries intelligence which the rich don't want. They just want a population to do their dirty work on the cheap for them. Most people spend most their time working in their own country and enjoy themselves in their free time, but with no work or very little mental stimulation people get bored or down.

Pattaya maybe a bit of a grot hole , but it at least has some things to do and like minded people (no I don't live there). If you are bored there you will certainly be bored in the 'real' Thailand of Nakon Nowhere. Unless of course you like being permantly drunk, having conversations about Thai soaps and stars and going down the local karaoke bar for teenage girls and the odd waterfall. Mental stimulation .....no chance.

The foreigners who seem happiest all the time here mostly live in Bangkok and work or teach all day and mostly mix with other westerners in western bars etc and some educated Thais or those that are in their first year or so here.

Thanks for your thoroughly uplifting point of view. I seriously hope you do not live here, with that attitude. Have you tried any laxatives lately? They can do wonders to lift up the spirits.

The truth is the truth. Which part do you think isn't true ?

Here 7 years, only here for my kids.

Your post is riddled with sweepingly negative generalizations which very few people would agree with.

There is very little to do in Thailand.

Study Thai language, learn Thai cooking, study Thai art and architecture, travel, ride an elephant, go on a trek, swim, camp, garden, teach, exercise, read, start a business, volunteer, raise a family. Life is what you make it.

Thailand has a very low educated population. Sure, Thailand's educational system can be improved, no argument there. But to conclude from this that it is impossible to have a stimulating conversation with the "average" Thai is ridiculous, and I'll bet dollars to doughnuts that if you find having a stimulating conversation with a Thai impossible, it is because of the limitations of your language skills. I have discussed Greece, the Burmese boat people, child rearing issues just in the past week with my 'Nakhon Nowhere' neighbors. It is also ridiculous to complain about lack of mental stimulation in a given place when you consider how much of your "mental stimulation" nowadays comes from cable TV, internet, i-tunes, social media, Amazon books, etc., all of which are available universally.

The only Thais I have met that can have a stimulating conversations were friends at university in England with me and some people they know and some my wife knows.

Again, this says a lot about you. You're suggesting that the only Thais worth talking to have to be Western educated. An extremely cultural centric point of view, which overlooks the fact that there isn't a profession out there which isn't well-represented by Thais.

it seems most who get a decent education then spend their lives sitting in their parents business and that's pretty much it.

A stupid generalization. What about all the doctors, lawyers, dentists, engineers, accountants, entrepreneurs, etc? The fact that you seem to be referring to people who go into their parent's business shows how superficial your insights are. And another thing, when kids do go into the family business, where do you get off suggesting that they are just sitting around? Few Thai businesses are lucrative enough that they can support that kind of dead weight; everyone has to pull their own weight, and that usually means working 12 hour shifts 7 days a week.

You need to live on an estate with educated Thais or westerners or there is a high chance you will be mentally bored.

One of these gated communities, hermetically sealed off from everyday life? No thanks! That's the last place I'd head if I were looking for stimulation. Sounds like a recipe for either dementia or depression. I would be bored to tears in a gated community. No way, Jose!

The country makes it hard for foreigners to work here as that would increase the countries intelligence which the rich don't want.

Total B.S. The Thai government restricts foreign employment to provide employment opportunities to its citizens.

They (the rich) just want a population to do their dirty work on the cheap for them.

First of all, if you don't think that much the same can be said about income inequality in the West (which has dramatically worsened in the past 30 years) you are mistaken. My read on the situation is that Thailand is slowly transitioning from an agrarian economy to a more diversified one. I believe the Thai government is making genuine efforts to expand economic opportunites for people who otherwise would remain on the farm.

Pattaya maybe a bit of a grot hole , but it at least has some things to do and like minded people.

In all seriousness, and without taking a swipe at Pattaya and it's wonderful residents, are you seriously suggesting Pattaya as some shinning beacon where people seeking intellectual stimulation should head? With tongue in cheek, I can only say, 'who knew?' I always thought Pattaya was a place to go if you were looking for other forms of stimulation.

If you are bored there (Pattaya) you will certainly be bored in the 'real' Thailand of Nakon Nowhere. Unless of course you like being permantly drunk, having conversations about Thai soaps and stars and going down the local karaoke bar for teenage girls and the odd waterfall. Mental stimulation .....no chance.

First of all, probably 99% of the guys living outside of urban areas are family men. That is, they have a wife, usually a child or two, and usually some extended family. So they are frequently more socially established than someone (I know this doesn't apply to everyone) who is sitting on a bar stool at 9:30 in the morning. Not to say that nobody out in the countryside has a drinking problem. But, just using Pattaya as an example, the Central Pattaya lifestyle is primarily geared towards bar life. And what do you do in bar? You drink, smoke cigarettes, play pool, darts, watch football on TV, and oftentimes have essentially anonymous sex with sex workers. So if you want to compare the likelihood that someone living a family oriented active "clean living" "simple" lifestyle out in the country versus someone persuing the above directionless (albeit stereotype, but nonetheless true) lifestyle described above, I submit that you are more likely to encounter the blues in a locale like Pattaya than out in the country.

Most of the guys out in the country who are younger 50-55 also seem to work off-shore which adds to the stability of the upcountry lifestyle. Many are farmers or teach or are devoted parents. Everybody's boredom threshhold differs, but those who stay active, and have a sense of purpose, rarely give voice to complaints about boredom. They also seem to be fairly financially secure, at least not living from one SS check or pension payment to the next.

And as for this notion that all Thais want to talk about are i-phone apps, last night's soap opera plot, or the price of chicken feet at the market, all I have to say is work on your Thai and you will soon discover that Thais are a lot smarter and much more "mentally stimulating" conversationalists than you ever imagined. If the topic of conversation isn't to your liking, you can always bring up a topic which is more of interest to you.

In summary, life, no matter where you live, is what you make it. Dismissing a whole country and it's people as incapable of providing his lordship's requisite stimulation is just plain silly, and more than a little pretentious.

Thank you so much for bringing some vim and vigor to one of the most morose and pessimistic posts I have read in a very, very long time. You have pointed out so much, that the original poster can learn from. Let us hope he takes it to heart, and begins to turn his life around. It is never too late to start enjoying life, and squeezing it for what it is worth, which is a lot.

Many of us have very rich lives here. While my wife may not be hi-so (i am thankful for that), and while she may not have a higher education, she is one of the most heartfelt, lighthearted, delightful, positive, loving, and kind people I have ever met. I meet very, very few people with qualities like that in the west. Very few.

I could not have put it better than the way you expressed yourself with your last statement. A beautiful truth that is.

[elliss]

I think anyone who lives here for any significant amount of time, wherever, will get the blues, to the d..ckheads that say Pattaya is not Thailand, yes it is, just a different shade..

Same as saying .

Visting London , is not the same as visiting Britain. ,

Time for a geography lesson.

[arthurwait]

Your post is riddled with sweepingly negative generalizations which very few people would agree with.

Ok we will see. The post was aimed at why some people get down.

My post may seem a bit down, but at the moment we have a 3 and a half year old and a 7 month old so so much of the time is looking after them while they sleep so yes I am a bit frustrated with the lack of mental stimulation/entertainment with other adults. Mix that with the neighbours both sides hounds from hell that are kept in cages going mad barking 24 hours a day waking us up 6 to 10 times every night I am on a bit of a tired fed up downer at the moment.

Study Thai language, learn Thai cooking, study Thai art and architecture, travel, ride an elephant, go on a trek, swim, camp, garden, teach, exercise, read, start a business, volunteer, raise a family. Life is what you make it.

I can hold a conversation in Thai read and write it, I'm very far from fluent at it but can do it. Maybe learning more would improve that but around the house (in Chonburi city) we are in until the new one is finished (1 and a half years late already) people do nothing but drink or watch Thai TV. Go to the next sois and roads and yes it's the same.

Exercise, yes I do that been with the kids to the park yesterday evening and today, watched the first half of Chonburi v Navy yesterday, left due to kids needing to go to bed. Run yesterday, walking today. Swam on Friday and Tuesday. Used to cycle but since having kids I don't like to risk a cycling accident. Since giving up one of my cycling partners (both Thai) has had a car hit him and break his arm, the other got hit and broke his back.

I've been cooking Thai food for 15 years since meeting the wife and other Thai friends at university. After 15 years it doesn't appeal much anymore. Still cook all the families meals cooked at home.

Ride an elephant, no I've seen what happens when it goes wrong.

Have a business, a couple between us. Working on something new at the moment, before seeing if it can meet all the legal requirements.

Teach, sat in on the wife doing that many years ago both got fed up with the kids only turning up when they wanted and usually between half an hour to an hour late and then expecting you to carry on and hour late for them. Oh and check my SPAG, bad isn't it ?

Thai art an architecture I'll take your word that it is of interest.

Thailand has a very low educated population. Sure, Thailand's educational system can be improved, no argument there. But to conclude from this that it is impossible to have a stimulating conversation with the "average" Thai is ridiculous, and I'll bet dollars to doughnuts that if you find having a stimulating conversation with a Thai impossible, it is because of the limitations of your language skills. I have discussed Greece, the Burmese boat people, child rearing issues just in the past week with my 'Nakhon Nowhere' neighbors. It is also ridiculous to complain about lack of mental stimulation in a given place when you consider how much of your "mental stimulation" nowadays comes from cable TV, internet, i-tunes, social media, Amazon books, etc., all of which are available universally.

As said there are Thais with decent education and interest but they don't seem to live round here, they go to Bangkok or abroad. As also said sure they are others around but you got to find them.

The only Thais I have met that can have a stimulating conversations were friends at university in England with me and some people they know and some my wife knows.

Again, this says a lot about you. You're suggesting that the only Thais worth talking to have to be Western educated. An extremely cultural centric point of view, which overlooks the fact that there isn't a profession out there which isn't well-represented by Thais.

Again you choose not to quote the part where I said sure there are others about.

it seems most who get a decent education then spend their lives sitting in their parents business and that's pretty much it.

A stupid generalization. What about all the doctors, lawyers, dentists, engineers, accountants, entrepreneurs, etc? The fact that you seem to be referring to people who go into their parent's business shows how superficial your insights are. And another thing, when kids do go into the family business, where do you get off suggesting that they are just sitting around? Few Thai businesses are lucrative enough that they can support that kind of dead weight; everyone has to pull their own weight, and that usually means working 12 hour shifts 7 days a week.

Again you choose to only quote what you want. Yep sure their are engineers and doctors and dentists. I know several engineers,Thai friends from university went on to be car designers , engineers , phd's , university lecturers, but all went abroad or to/ back to Bangkok. Wifes uncle was deputy chief scientist for the department of agriculture, her aunt was a economics university lecturer, but do there live here ? No. Are people like this all over Thailand ? No. Do most ex -pats meet people like this daily ? No.

As for kids not doing much in the family businesses you obviously haven't seen half the cousins watching Korean soaps or playing candy crush except twice a month when the lottery tickets come out. Wholesale lottery ticket business for about 50 years so going for more than 20 years before they started (one does seem to do it all for them though) or the uncles house building business where one of the sons works hard and the other spends his time chasing gigs. Or maybe the wifes ultra spoilt brother who lay in bed until 6pm until the age of 23 or 24 when his mum provided him with everything start his own business which he has never paid back. Oh and still ended up credit blacklisted (5.3 +MB car repossession) before coming to ask mum for a new Mercedes and 24 million baht for a house. That got reduced to our car and 7.5 MB for a deposit on a house, that got turned down so he went to an aunt who also turned him down, should have seen how upset he was. Family businesses not supporting kids doing not much, hmmm if you say so.

You need to live on an estate with educated Thais or westerners or there is a high chance you will be mentally bored.

One of these gated communities, hermetically sealed off from everyday life? No thanks! That's the last place I'd head if I were looking for stimulation. Sounds like a recipe for either dementia or depression. I would be bored to tears in a gated community. No way, Jose!

Each to their own. After having eateries open until 4am with customers blaring car stereos out at the previous house and the hounds from hell all night at this one, I know which I would choose.

The country makes it hard for foreigners to work here as that would increase the countries intelligence which the rich don't want.

Total B.S. The Thai government restricts foreign employment to provide employment opportunities to its citizens.

We will have to agree to differ on that.

They (the rich) just want a population to do their dirty work on the cheap for them.

First of all, if you don't think that much the same can be said about income inequality in the West (which has dramatically worsened in the past 30 years) you are mistaken. My read on the situation is that Thailand is slowly transitioning from an agrarian economy to a more diversified one. I believe the Thai government is making genuine efforts to expand economic opportunites for people who otherwise would remain on the farm.

Income equality in the west isn't the same. While those on benefits will deeply struggle, it isn't much, but it is more than is provided for people here.

People on low incomes again can struggle with the cost of things in the west, but not on the same level as the poor here. Healthcare and schooling and opportunities for people in the west do not compare to those for the poor in Thailand.

It's a country of business monopolies who donate to the governments to get what they want.

Pattaya maybe a bit of a grot hole , but it at least has some things to do and like minded people.

In all seriousness, and without taking a swipe at Pattaya and it's wonderful residents, are you seriously suggesting Pattaya as some shinning beacon where people seeking intellectual stimulation should head? With tongue in cheek, I can only say, 'who knew?' I always thought Pattaya was a place to go if you were looking for other forms of stimulation.

Not at all, but people can find people that have similar interests and language there where they will struggle to find people like that elsewhere. You're not looking down on people in Pattaya are you, your lordship ?

If you are bored there (Pattaya) you will certainly be bored in the 'real' Thailand of Nakon Nowhere. Unless of course you like being permantly drunk, having conversations about Thai soaps and stars and going down the local karaoke bar for teenage girls and the odd waterfall. Mental stimulation .....no chance.

First of all, probably 99% of the guys living outside of urban areas are family men. That is, they have a wife, usually a child or two, and usually some extended family. So they are frequently more socially established than someone (I know this doesn't apply to everyone) who is sitting on a bar stool at 9:30 in the morning. Not to say that nobody out in the countryside has a drinking problem. But, just using Pattaya as an example, the Central Pattaya lifestyle is primarily geared towards bar life. And what do you do in bar? You drink, smoke cigarettes, play pool, darts, watch football on TV, and oftentimes have essentially anonymous sex with sex workers. So if you want to compare the likelihood that someone living a family oriented active "clean living" "simple" lifestyle out in the country versus someone persuing the above directionless (albeit stereotype, but nonetheless true) lifestyle described above, I submit that you are more likely to encounter the blues in a locale like Pattaya than out in the country.

There are family guys everywhere, whether outside urban areas or in them like Pattaya. Many running businesses not sitting on barstools, You have seen all the farang businesses in Pattaya haven't you ? There are also barstool guys everywhere. 99% of guys outside urban areas are not family men, nowhere even close.Loads are single retirees and many of those married to Thais have absolutely nothing in common with their Thai families and can barely speak a word of Thai and the families can't speak a word of English. You have seen all the drunks and trolls we have had on here over the years who live outside of urban areas ?

Most of the guys out in the country who are younger 50-55 also seem to work off-shore which adds to the stability of the upcountry lifestyle. Many are farmers or teach or are devoted parents. Everybody's boredom threshhold differs, but those who stay active, and have a sense of purpose, rarely give voice to complaints about boredom. They also seem to be fairly financially secure, at least not living from one SS check or pension payment to the next.

If so many guys in the country work why are so many on here all day ? 50-55 is younger ?

And as for this notion that all Thais want to talk about are i-phone apps, last night's soap opera plot, or the price of chicken feet at the market, all I have to say is work on your Thai and you will soon discover that Thais are a lot smarter and much more "mentally stimulating" conversationalists than you ever imagined. If the topic of conversation isn't to your liking, you can always bring up a topic which is more of interest to you.

Yes again I said there were people but often hard to find. Have you witnessed Bangkok lately where they all walk and sit staring into their phones ? The BTS is like zombieland.

In summary, life, no matter where you live, is what you make it. Dismissing a whole country and it's people as incapable of providing his lordship's requisite stimulation is just plain silly, and more than a little pretentious.

I didn't dismiss the whole country did I ? As for your lordship and pretentious comments, I will refer you back Pattaya.

The simple point is that compared to most of our countries there is little to do in the way of what we like doing back home and in places hard to find people to converse with, unless of course you are super quick at learning one of the most difficult languages to learn. It isn't the be all and end all , but it can contribute to the 'blues'. Especially outside of Bangkok. Unless of course you like Thai cooking, Thai architecture, riding an elephant. etc.

Edited July 5, 2015 by arthurwait

[arthurwait]

The fact is this country has very little to do and a very low educated population. The only Thais I have met that can have a stimulating conversations were friends at university in England with me and some people they know and some my wife knows. They all themselves have left Thailand or live in Bangkok. Sure there are some more out there, but it seems most who get a decent education then spend their lives sitting in their parents business and that's pretty much it. You need to live on an estate with educated Thais or westerners or there is a high chance you will be mentally bored.

The country makes it hard for foreigners to work here as that would increase the countries intelligence which the rich don't want. They just want a population to do their dirty work on the cheap for them. Most people spend most their time working in their own country and enjoy themselves in their free time, but with no work or very little mental stimulation people get bored or down.

Pattaya maybe a bit of a grot hole , but it at least has some things to do and like minded people (no I don't live there). If you are bored there you will certainly be bored in the 'real' Thailand of Nakon Nowhere. Unless of course you like being permantly drunk, having conversations about Thai soaps and stars and going down the local karaoke bar for teenage girls and the odd waterfall. Mental stimulation .....no chance.

The foreigners who seem happiest all the time here mostly live in Bangkok and work or teach all day and mostly mix with other westerners in western bars etc and some educated Thais or those that are in their first year or so here.

Thanks for your thoroughly uplifting point of view. I seriously hope you do not live here, with that attitude. Have you tried any laxatives lately? They can do wonders to lift up the spirits.

The truth is the truth. Which part do you think isn't true ?

Here 7 years, only here for my kids.

I am not doubting the extent of your misery here. I am only saying that there are things a man can do to improve his perspective on his life, and on his chosen place to live. Getting out of Pattaya often, and traveling around, with or without your family. Just get out. Change things up. Surround yourself with people who are not so down on life. A lot of options to improve your lot in life.

What misery and who is in Pattaya ?

[KaneGoring]

I am a long way off being able to move over but have a few strategies in place for when I eventually can. I'll be keeping my house or hopefully by that stage houses and renting them out using that money to support myself and I don't think I will move to a tourist area well not to the centre of it one of my mates ex's family lives on a very nice gated community about 20 min out of Patts it had basic shops etc nearby I think I could live there. If I came into a windfall and could do it before retirement age Id have to buy a business of some sort for something to do I know this can be a very quick way to loose money but I'd have to do something otherwise I'd end up sitting round drinking all the time. My first plan was to go halves in a hotel with my Mate and each spend 7 months a year running it with a 2 month overlap during busy season then go home and see family and travel in the other 5 months but most tourist places in Thailand seem to have an over abundance of Accommodation so not shore that's the best idea and we would have to come up with the money to buy a big enough one outright plus a 2bed apartment and transport I think I worked out we need about 30m TBH each we are a long way from having that but I have bought more lottery tickets since in the hope of finding it.

[Franky Bear]

Could blues be defined as something similar to home sickness?

[guzzi850m2]

I am getting the "Thai Blues" now and again too.

Haven't been home in "Scandi" since 2004, old friends long time lost, not that I had that many, still have some i-net contact with a few of them.

Live in the outskirts of Pattaya, in a quiet Moo Baan with many friendly Thai doctors and expats. It's Thailand all-right, right about in the middle of the Kingdom

Talked to my wife of going back but no way will she be leaving Thailand despite it would be best for our 5 year old son, which I pointed out for her, but no, its her home here and I work WW 6 moth per year so I can understand her decision.

I am not too keen on going back too, I must admit when I think hard about it, the lousy climate and the taxes on everything, hmmm, not so good. Only when I get the "blues" are I thinking about my homeland (summers, lol).

We got very good private schools here in sin city, hospitals and many big shopping centers too and what else a family might need here, there are more than go-go shows here.

Have some good expat friends here, some I go motorbiking with and others I have lunch with and a fellow country man in the village pop by for a cup of tea a couple of times a week.

The drinking buddies I had before are now long time gone (when my son was born), I think I see some of them sometimes when I pass my old watering holes on my scooter, they look haggered.

I am an outsider here but I was also an outsider in my home country, so I fell at home here (mostly), since my family is here.

Edited July 6, 2015 by guzzi850m2

[thaibeachlovers]

Could blues be defined as something similar to home sickness?

Absolutely no way.

I don't miss the old home even a smidgin, but I do get the Thai blues, usually when I have to drive in the insanity that is Thai traffic.

[fey]

After three years here, I'm packing up and returning to the US. It's not so much that I dislike Thailand, it's that there are so many more options in the US. People talk about traveling around, but really, how many rice/corn fields and small villages or temples do you want to see? There is very little geographical diversity in Thailand. I plan a multi-state motorcycle tour of the Western region of the US. I won't need a visa, no 90 day reports, the police actually "police" (I find it amusing how many people on TV say they enjoy the "laxness" of the laws and then complain the police do nothing), and I find most people to be friendly and helpful. I like streets that are wide, sidewalks I can walk on, and roads that seem infinite to ride on.

I will miss certain aspects of Thailand, but when you really look at Thailand, it's pretty scruffy. I live just outside of the moat area in Chiang Mai. Ride down the soi and you see about 5 trash dumps, not one yard that doesn't have 2 foot high weeds, a dozen holes in the road, and that pure aroma of sewage. I kind of ignore all that, after all, it's expected here, but it will not disappoint me to be where things are a little more "manicured".

I'm pretty happy wherever I am, but I've spent my time here, enjoyed it, and now I'll move on. I don't understand why some people on TV seem so "protective" of Thailand. If it works for you, fine. If not, fine, but no reason to try and push your beliefs on others.

as you produce a blurb pushing your own beliefs!! lol

That's exactly what it is ... his own beliefs.

Certain types of people need to anchor to one place. They end up complaining because psychologically they CANT move.

Like the elephant who grew up with a leg chain and won't flee his pen even though the chain is long gone.

These types are pushed to foreign countries for legal, financial or other reasons, or they gutted a vacation once, blew it for some reason and returning is not an option. Sometimes its old age.

[Ghostnigel]

If I felt trapped in any country other than my home country I'd get the serious blues. In fact I did and I moved back to the US where I have first world cleanliness, rule of law and temperate, good weather. The most important thing to me was that in LOS I lost too much contact with life long friends and family.

I actually worry about some guys who are squeaking by on a minimal amount of money and may not have alternatives. I would go crazy. I am much happier having my nice home and real pickup and car and then traveling any time I want to wherever I want. Some guys tell me they feel they have more freedom in LOS, but I never did. Freedom to me is setting foot back onto US soil when I want to and having a right to be there, a right to own property, the rule of law and so on.

To each his own.

So why did you leave Utopia in the first place?

[Soutpeel]

If I felt trapped in any country other than my home country I'd get the serious blues. In fact I did and I moved back to the US where I have first world cleanliness, rule of law and temperate, good weather. The most important thing to me was that in LOS I lost too much contact with life long friends and family.

I actually worry about some guys who are squeaking by on a minimal amount of money and may not have alternatives. I would go crazy. I am much happier having my nice home and real pickup and car and then traveling any time I want to wherever I want. Some guys tell me they feel they have more freedom in LOS, but I never did. Freedom to me is setting foot back onto US soil when I want to and having a right to be there, a right to own property, the rule of law and so on.

To each his own.

So why did you leave Utopia in the first place?

To visit the " temples and beaches" in Thailand

What I cant figure out with the Oregon Oracle, he obviously has a distaste for Thailand, but waves the flag on a Thailand orientated forum every chance he gets

Edited July 8, 2015 by Soutpeel

[thaibeachlovers]

Had a major case of the "Thai blues" yesterday. Wifey and I were heading to the village but the SIL stuck a huge spanner in the works before we even left, so my carefully thought out plan was toast. Eventually we left, hours late, and after about 2 hours I had calmed down, only to find that the waterproof cover I asked the SIL to put in the back of the pickup was not there, so major meltdown ensued.

By this time, she was telling wifey that she never wanted to travel with me again, to which I told the beloved that I was really happy about that and hope she means it.

Still PO today.

[n210mp]

Events have moved on a bit since I posted the OP

My thoughts have certainly changed a bit, maybe I am a little more positive about what is happening around me personally and the way that I am affected by the lives of other people who I have come to love and respect.

A few days ago we got a phone call from one of Wans aged Aunts telling us that her Dad is in hospital in KK with a serious problem.

Wan and I are the only younger people left within the close family who are available to help ( We are on the outskirts of pattaya) we were contacted because Wans sister and brother are all in Oz being married to Ozzies.

So dutifully and worried we went off to the small village north of KK to do what we could do.

Wans family are a lovely group of people, Papa ex Bangkok Thai Chinese and Mama an Issan lady, they have never ever took one penny off me in nearly ten years of marriage to Wan and are amongst those I consider to be my closest family and I love them very much, needless to say Wan feels the same way but much more so.

In essence this visit, where we were needed but not asked to go other than by another Aunty was the chance that I could do more with Wans mama and Papa then I did with my own Mam and dad when they were getting old and infirm.

We are at this time taking care of them in the village.

Papa is getting over a very bad infection in his "gout" twisted feet and the emergency was a severe and toxic infection and massive swelling that burst a few days ago causing him to be admitted to hospital for emergency treatment.

Yesterday morning we brought him home on the proviso to the Doctor that we could look after him and change his dressings until He can get about again himself

It was and is typical that He didn't ask for any help.

Anyway back to the topic.

Having the chance to be of some good use this last few days seems to have improved not only my depression but also maybe my self esteem.

I seem to have fallen into a trap living in Pattaya and surrounded by so many similar people as me who are totally self centered and self obsessed.

Papa will soon be back to his old self, I know that from his demeanor when I am changing his dressings and so we will be back to sin city soon but this time I hope that the current or should I say previous thought processes that instigated this thread will no longer stay with me and maybe I will be able to find a niche in pattaya where my presence will help maybe those who need some practical help instead of passing the hours away either on my bike or in front of the TV keyboard.

I hope that I can maintain this positive attitude long enough to find somewhere in Pattaya that I can both help myself and others at the same time.

I always found that work was and is the best therapy, its time to find some.

[MatteoBassini]

[federico]

A famous french poet named Baudelaire wrote : "This life is an hospital in which every patient is possessed by the desire of changing bed "

[dageurreotype]

Pattaya isnt Thailand to me, I have never lived in Pattaya although visited the place a few times, I don't like it all... I wouldn't really call it 'proper Thailand'

Seems to me your friends need to experience Thailand for real and not just some scummy seedy area sat on a bar stool supping beer with bar girls, that's not a dig by the way. How about trying somewhere else out in Thailand away from the tourist zones?

I have lived in Thailand for 3 years and since moving up NE Thailand I am much more happy and relaxed with my wife and son, I don't think I could stay in Pattaya etc for more than a week, I also hate the seedy places in BKK. Up here I have met so many proper friends Thai and non Thai who are genuine.

Cheers

Just to say, not all of us living in 'tourist areas' are sitting on bar stools all day. I'm getting tired of the assumption that all of us are. And to reiterate robertthebruce's post, I too would go out of my head with the boredom, at least after a week. Even Bangkok becomes boring after a while, at least on Phuket everything you'd need is just around the corner and you don't need an hour's taxi drive to buy a second hand book on the sole outlet on Sukumvit!