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My ultra reliable maid of 6 years, now stealing cash.


xvend

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I've had a maid for 6 years, she's like 50 yrs old, comes once a week does all my laundry, and will take care of my dog while I'm away. because her duration of employment I just give her 1,000THB for around 2 hours work per week.

 

I had no problem leaving my house key for her and have many expensive items items in my home.

 

I caught her twice stealing cash from me, and not much. I empty my pockets before I go to bed.

 

First time:
around 400 baht left on my kitchen island, I knew it was there, left my house for work and came back. It was gone. Called her, she said so sorry I threw it in the garbage. I didn't even bother to check the 1 garbage bag outside as to not embarrass her. She came to my house and gave the money back. Who throws money in the garbage anyways?

 

Second time (Yesterday):
I physically counted 170THB and left it on my desk just as a test. Went to work, came back, gone. She turned her phone off or had no credit for 24 hours. Got a hold of her next day, calmly asked she bring the money back and she did. Fired her on the spot.

 

The point is, if she just called and told be she needed the money I would've said ok.

 

I am in no means Thai bashing, as  I could give countless examples where this has happened to me in other countries. A simple phone call is all i ask. /finish_rant

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If this has happened to you in other countries, why do you leave money laying around?  

 

I had no idea my husband left loose change in his pockets until we bought a clothes washer and I started to do our laundry vs. dropping it off at the "laundry lady.  Sure it was just "lose change", but often I find 60 -100 baht with each load of laundry in his many pockets.  Has any laundry lady here in Thailand ever returned the loose change?  Nope.  She had returned the occasional USB stick or other item that looked like it might be valuable or missed, but loose change.  Never.

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If you leave  money laying around,it's just putting temptation in peoples

way,and you should never do that,she probably was short of money,

but did not steal any of your many expensive items,so count yourself

lucky,and I think you will have a job finding an honest reliable replacement,

maybe you should have talked to her and ask what problems she had.

regards Worgeordie

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5 minutes ago, NancyL said:

If this has happened to you in other countries, why do you leave money laying around?  

 

 

 

Hi Nancy, it's my house. I am very careful with money. Ill pick 1 baht off the street if I see it.

 

I empty my pockets for the exact reason you describe. So it doesn't end up in the laundry.

 

I guess my point is there was a certain matter of trust buit over the years where it was comfortable for me to leave a few hundred baht on a counter/desk.

 

Just ranting and disappointed.

Edited by xvend
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Two wrongs here,her for taking it and you for leaving it,especially as you say it has happened before,albeit in other countries.

You may now have difficulty replacing her :whistling: see if you can speak with her and maybe a solution can be found.

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I leave my wallet lying around, laptops, iPads, iPhones... our Live in Maid / Nanny is wonderful and has never even given the hint of taking anything. 

 

That said, her mother works for my Inlaws... there is a generation of underlying trust.

 

She is getting married in a few months and will be leaving us...  I'll then have to start being careful again. 

 

But, if I can't trust someone with a few thousand baht... I can't trust them with my Son, we'll have to be on our toes once more. 

 

 

 

 

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27 minutes ago, xvend said:

 

Hi Nancy, it's my house. I am very careful with money. Ill pick 1 baht off the street if I see it.

 

I empty my pockets for the exact reason you describe. So it doesn't end up in the laundry.

 

I guess my point is there was a certain matter of trust buit over the years where it was comfortable for me to leave a few hundred baht on a counter/desk.

 

Just ranting and disappointed.

 

Why are you playing with her?  Like others have said you wouldn't leave 50 bucks on the table in your own country, so why do it here? It's like poor people entrapment. 

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22 minutes ago, worgeordie said:

If you leave  money laying around,it's just putting temptation in peoples

way,and you should never do that,she probably was short of money,

but did not steal any of your many expensive items,so count yourself

lucky,and I think you will have a job finding an honest reliable replacement,

maybe you should have talked to her and ask what problems she had.

regards Worgeordie

 

This is a thing I've learned employing many 100's of people over the years. Even if you ask if they have a problem, they won't tell you out of pride or whatever. The other staff will tell you.

 

I had one long time employee in thailand that got into the pooper over gambling to the the tune of over 100,000thb with a huge vig. I noticed she seemed stressed, asked her and she said everything was ok.

 

I then asked our manager what was wrong with her and she told me. I bailed her out and just deducted 5,000 from her salary each month until it was paid back to me at 0 interest. She met her obligation, but would never of admitted her debt directly.

 

My maid kept continually asking me to pre-pay her weekly salary but gave no reason why, I knew she was in the shit, but I have no idea her other sources of income and don't appreciate being treated like an atm, especially without being able to gauge the likelihood that it would be a one time thing.

 

BTW I did pre-pay her salary several times, but sometimes enough is enough. I even found her other jobs.

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4 minutes ago, theguyfromanotherforum said:

 

Why are you playing with her?  Like others have said you wouldn't leave 50 bucks on the table in your own country, so why do it here? It's like poor people entrapment. 

 

huh? So I'm supposed to lock away all my valuables each time the maid comes?

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1 hour ago, NancyL said:

If this has happened to you in other countries, why do you leave money laying around?  

 

I had no idea my husband left loose change in his pockets until we bought a clothes washer and I started to do our laundry vs. dropping it off at the "laundry lady.  Sure it was just "lose change", but often I find 60 -100 baht with each load of laundry in his many pockets.  Has any laundry lady here in Thailand ever returned the loose change?  Nope.  She had returned the occasional USB stick or other item that looked like it might be valuable or missed, but loose change.  Never.

 

But did YOU give the loose change back to "hubby" :)

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No excuse for this, she has no respect for you. Have heard this time and again of thieving maids, typically through owner being too familiar/friendly and/or overpaying. Folk trying to make excuses for her are living in cloud cuckoo land. Would you pussyfoot around a pilfering maid in your home countries? The cops would more likely be called. IMO you did the right thing.

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I've just had a young Thai guy deliver a custom made computer to my house around 20 kms from his. I'd met him when he and another guy had delivered some items from a large store here and I'd jokingly asked if he could fix computers as mine had just died on me, again. To my surprise he'd told me he was a computer engineer just helping his dad out with deliveries from said superstore. He'd told me when he'd finished work, he'd come back and take a look at my dead computer. This he did in the pouring rain, at the arranged time. He'd then accessed a parts store from his laptop and given me an estimate as to how much a brand new spec computer would cost. I gave him the money in cash and told him to go ahead. He'd said he'd be able to get it to me by Monday, he had it here today, Friday.

 

The computerised/itemised bill he'd presented was a thousand over that which I'd given him. Without his asking,  I'd given him the balance plus (it transpired) a 400 baht labour charge. He didn't say anything, again. When I'd noticed my error he told me he'd just wanted to help me out and never mind. I gave him what I'd had left in my wallet, a paltry, to me, 1k for all his running around, on top of pick up/delivery, go buying the parts and assembling them.

 

They're not all bad and frankly I couldn't live anywhere I couldn't trust anyone. There are some complete kuntz here though. Both Thai AND farang.

 

 

Edited by dageurreotype
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honesty is a requirement really for anyone that you invite into your home, especially if you are paying them to do work for you. Where is the sense having a maid if you have to lock everything away before she is allowed in, part of their job responsibility is honesty and not stealing from their employer, its the same with any sort of employment, to steal from an employer is to show total lack of respect for them. He had her working for him for 6 years and this has just started, of course he would have trusted her completely, he has done the only thing possible and she had the chance to defend herself and explain why to him but didnt, loss of trust in someone is a hard thing to ignore

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11 hours ago, cornishcarlos said:

 

But did YOU give the loose change back to "hubby" :)

I put it in the little ceramic bank he uses to collect loose change for charity.  THAT's where I thought he put the stuff in this pockets anyway, not giving it to the laundry lady!  I sometimes add my own change to that bank, too.

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10 hours ago, daveAustin said:

No excuse for this, she has no respect for you. Have heard this time and again of thieving maids, typically through owner being too familiar/friendly and/or overpaying. Folk trying to make excuses for her are living in cloud cuckoo land. Would you pussyfoot around a pilfering maid in your home countries? The cops would more likely be called. IMO you did the right thing.

Finally a voice of reason.  I have serious concerns about the mental health of some of the respondents here. 

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SLOW DOWN BEFORE GOING FROM FRYING PAN TO FIRE

 

Some observations, we have maid 6 days a week, and pay 300Batt a day (8Hrs), and she is happy with money Issan

 

1000 for two hours work very generous, two hrs massage for me and 1000 batt gets very good results! !

 

So she has been with you six yrs maybe talk to her and see if it can be stopped, she will not easily get 1000 for two hours

 

Maybe better the one you know, than do not know, she will hopefully be more wary

 

I also believe we have a duty not to place temptation, in front of people, like cash for people with little or even lots of money

 

In future limit your loss by what you leave available !!

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I would have just asked her if she needed some help with money... she might have had a short term emergency and be in a really tough spot. Since she has a history of being good, and it sounds like she is not too rehearsed or competent at being a thief... since you are comfortable and she has been a good employee in the past, maybe if there is a brief crisis this might have been a good time for an early Christmas bonus or even a loan... 

 

I understand the feeling of betrayal, especially because you are paying her very generously... six years is a long time for a maid. She has been good for a long time. Something must be up... and it may not be too late. Maybe call and invite her over for a coffee and put it all on the table... find out the reality of the situation and it just might touch your heart. 

 

ps - yes, I know this is an alternative view - and that she deserves to be fired... but if the OP took the time to post this, maybe he is looking for something beyond the obvious - yes, fire her and move on... obviously the post was made because there was some feeling there... 

Edited by kenk24
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I understand your point but at the same time I don't agree in how you handled this. I have worker in several places overseas where accommodations were provided including maid service. The Golden Rule is never leave anything of value lying around. Especially money! Lock it up as you would if you were staying in a hotel room. 

 

I agree that it is your place and you shouldn't have to do this. But as you said, you lost an ultra reliable maid of 6 years and she lost a job over chump change. Both of which could have been avoided if you played your cards differently. It is the small stuff they take as they think you won't miss that or make a fuss over that. If it was you Lap Top Computer, then this is a different story. If you want to test honesty and loyalty test your wife or friends, and not your maid.  

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53 minutes ago, joeyg said:

Finally a voice of reason.  I have serious concerns about the mental health of some of the respondents here. 

It's not a mental health issue - there really are some d*ckheads who post on Thai Visa. But it's always worth a laugh reading some of the responses, and not just on your post...

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11 hours ago, Deepinthailand said:

Simple answer do your own washing and cleaning. If it's only 2 hrs a week sure you could do it yourself

in the army we would get charged with committing an offence if we left our lockers un locked. i agree with this poster however just dont put yourself in a position that you have to trust anyone. keep life simple and enjoy it more.

 

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10 hours ago, seajae said:

honesty is a requirement really for anyone that you invite into your home, especially if you are paying them to do work for you. Where is the sense having a maid if you have to lock everything away before she is allowed in, part of their job responsibility is honesty and not stealing from their employer, its the same with any sort of employment, to steal from an employer is to show total lack of respect for them. He had her working for him for 6 years and this has just started, of course he would have trusted her completely, he has done the only thing possible and she had the chance to defend herself and explain why to him but didnt, loss of trust in someone is a hard thing to ignore

Yes but.....when you spend a night in a hotel room do you lock up your extra money, credit cards, and passport when you are out and when the maid comes in to clean your room? Why" Is it because you believe every maid is a thief? 

 

No! You do it because you don't know this person and you don't trust strangers with your valuables. Or at the very least don't want to tempt them. I see  no difference here.

 

Yes she was under his employment. But I doubt he knew her too well even if she worked one day a week for 6 years. What is obvious is that if you are cleaning someone else's house for small money, you are doing this because you are poor and need the money. 

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