when's my Thai gf going to offer to pay for dinner?

[cheapskatesam]

I've been with my Thai girlfriend for over a month now and we've been out for a meal numerous times.. be it noodle stand near the road..  or a 1000baht hotel buffet. Not once has she offered to pay.. or even pay half and it's really getting on my nerves. It's the norm now.. the bill comes.. i look at her.. she looks at me.. and i get my wallet out.

 

I know i'm a "cheapskate" farang most of the time but i do believe that i as the western man should pay for MOST things and i honestly don't mind.. but just once in a bloody while it would be good  for her to get the bill.

 

I don't know the details of her income or even her job.. she works for a Japanese company as a "Senior Accounting Officer" but she can afford her condo and a new honda car...

 

She's talking about a weekend trip to Singapore and i'm thinking of excuses to get out of it.. because i don't want to pay for everything

I suppose i'm going to be paying for flights + hotels + food 

[allane]

When is hell going to freeze over ?

[Swiss1960]

 
She's talking about a weekend trip to Singapore and i'm thinking of excuses to get out of it.. because i don't want to pay for everything
I suppose i'm going to be paying for flights + hotels + food 

Correct assumption. YOU are going to pay for all (you forgot her shoe / bag / clothes shopping) and are getting sex in return. Same same here and in the West, case closed.

Sent from my HTC 10 using Thaivisa Connect mobile app

[cheapskatesam]

Never had this experience in the west.. girls always offered to pay or go half.. 

[samsensam]

 

it's not difficult to date thai girls here who pay 50/50 or at least offer to pay. once the relationship gets going we usually take turns to pay. the same with holidays 50/50. many i date insist on paying their way. it is true i date middle class educated, professional women with good jobs, maybe you should try that?

 

 

[lemonjelly]

Topic has been done to death on this forum already..... your last troll thread was also inane, you are either :

a) one of the staff trying to click bait 

b). Someone who is too easily amused.

[Lamkyong]

1 hour ago, lemonjelly said:

Topic has been done to death on this forum already..... your last troll thread was also inane, you are either :

a) one of the staff trying to click bait 

b). Someone who is too easily amused.

thats two new words i have learnt today   click bait and fire sale    wow what a fast moving world

[Langsuan Man]

Like mine:

 

When she wins the lottery 

[Lamkyong]

47 minutes ago, Langsuan Man said:

Like mine:

 

When she wins the lottery 

even then you will have to ask  if you are brave/stupid enough  i suggest if you are hoping to introduce a western type system here you are  on a  voyage to nowhere 

[JHolmesJr]

2 hours ago, cheapskatesam said:

Never had this experience in the west.. girls always offered to pay or go half.. 

but they also take half when it goes tits up.

[transam]

4 hours ago, cheapskatesam said:

Never had this experience in the west.. girls always offered to pay or go half.. 

You ain't in the West.......Plus your West birds might have been fat and ugly or felt sorry for you.........

[petermik]

11 hours ago, cheapskatesam said:

Never had this experience in the west.. girls always offered to pay or go half.. 

Girls here aren,t as desperate

tell her your happy to pay half of any bills and then (probably) watch her walk away

[Berkshire]

There are a number of qualities that I look for in my GF/wife....things like physical attractiveness, honesty, sense of humor, frugality, good family, pleasant demeanor, sensual, responsible, etc.  But I must say, "paying for dinner" would be pretty darn low on my list of endearing qualities. 

[Andyfez]

5 hours ago, cheapskatesam said:

Never had this experience in the west.. girls always offered to pay or go half.. 

This isn't the west.

If you want to date a genuine Thai girl in Thailand, you do it on Thai terms.

[colinneil]

When is my Thai gf going to offer to pay for dinner????       

You for real????   

Wakey wakey, this is Thailand, farang pay end of.

[biggles45]

Its not just with a Foreigner though,  and it is not because she is giving you access to the pussy. Thai culture usually sees the person with the most money picking up the bill. If you were to dine with quite well off Thais you may find one of them paying, this has been written a few times on the forum. 

[yellowboat]

If you feel like a sucker, you usually are being suckered. 

[Katipo]

6 hours ago, Swiss1960 said:

 

Correct assumption. YOU are going to pay for all (you forgot her shoe / bag / clothes shopping) and are getting sex in return. Same same here and in the West, case closed.

Sent from my HTC 10 using Thaivisa Connect mobile app
 

 

 

If you're with a girl who thinks that's the way, and you're prepared to accept it. There are plenty of girls who take pride in contributing, my gf included. I've actually figured out that having her as my gf actually saves me money. For example, if we go on holiday, she will pay half of transport costs, food, and hotel. So basically, I end up paying for myself as if I was travelling alone, but save 50% on accommodation as she pays for half of that. The more I give to her, the more she gives to me. Fantastic.

Now, I realise finding a girl like this is not the easiest, but finding one who contributes something is not that hard. In my years in Thailand, pretty much every girl I have been involved with contributed to our expenses, and without me having to ask.

My advice would be to talk to your gf about your concerns, specifically asking her questions that will gauge her preconceptions on the issue. Be careful not to come across as accusing however, as that could lead to loss of face or an argument.

[1FinickyOne]

6 hours ago, cheapskatesam said:

Never had this experience in the west.. girls always offered to pay or go half.. 

I am going out on a limb here - maybe this GF has never been in or have dating experience in the West... and if it bothers you, then why don't you tell her so... maybe she thinks you should not only be paying for her meal, but giving her something for her time too... 

 

Communication can be a good thing, if you feel you need something verbal... just ask.

[elgordo38]

After marriage forget the whole idea. If it bothers you its a discussion item. Cut bait and run sounds like a possible action. You only have one month invested. 

[tagalong]

Talk about cons!     I knew someone on Phuket who used to take farang  to see her parents in the bush....

On arriving after motor bike n 30 mins walk they come across the family in a run down shack with barest of essentials.....

After  a day when leaving she asks the farang, can he help the family with 10,000 B...as they are very poor......

Of course they oblige n off they go....Unbeknown to the farang the family also pack-up n go back to their home in the city.....

Best con I av ever heard of....They rent the shed from a farmer for the scam set-up....

 

[captnhoy]

To borrow from that old movie "Wayne's World".......when a monkey flies out of your ass.

Edited March 2, 2017 by captnhoy

[Emster23]

In many ways consider Thailand to be like the west in the 40's and 50's: men were always expected to pay, it was understood. Man gets "benefit" of showing off he has resources to woo this woman properly.

[captnhoy]

turning off auto reply

[realenglish1]

Don't expect her to do it I have been with my lady for  10 years now and on a couple of occasions like a birthday

she has paid but in general No

 

This is the norm lf Thai woman Farang always pay

[TheFishman1]

lol Amazing Thailand if you want the honey you pay for it a month is not a long time I when out with a girl for several months she would always wanted to pay why because she wanted the whole deal the big bucks as in marry me but I soon realized it was just her wanting half of everything I had TIT

[Straight8]

3 hours ago, JHolmesJr said:

but they also take half when it goes tits up.

and the rest... actually, you'd count yourself lucky if you only got starched for half.

[totally thaied up]

I find this so funny.

 

When I met my wife, we went the first date to a nice but neat restaurant that did not charge the world. It was around 60 baht a dish.

 

We ordered a few dishes, and at the end of a very nice meal, she opened up her purse, and she had only stacks of 10 baht coins. The bill was 220 baht, and she paid me 110 baht in coins. She said she worked hard for her money and said, that you also work hard for your money and I should not expect to pay.

 

Now, this was her first ever date with a farang.

 

Now I have been out on many of dates over the years. From women with excellent jobs to girls with money and not one had paid a cent. My Girl was a seller at a market, and for the next month when we went out for dinner or lunch, it was the same deal.

 

She paid half and she knew nothing about farang ways at all.

 

When things got serious between us, the truth came out. Yes, she was a seller at a market (looked after the store for her Mum when the Mum was busy), but in truth, she was an Accountant that ran her own business for several large condos and was on good contract money.

 

She was a keeper, and I certainly will not let her go. In general, decent hard working people with the right principles will pay.

[transam]

2 minutes ago, totally thaied up said:

I find this so funny.

 

When I met my wife, we went the first date to a nice but neat restaurant that did not charge the world. It was around 60 baht a dish.

 

We ordered a few dishes, and at the end of a very nice meal, she opened up her purse, and she had only stacks of 10 baht coins. The bill was 220 baht, and she paid me 110 baht in coins. She said she worked hard for her money and said, that you also work hard for your money and I should not expect to pay.

 

Now, this was her first ever date with a farang.

 

Now I have been out on many of dates over the years. From women with excellent jobs to girls with money and not one had paid a cent. My Girl was a seller at a market, and for the next month when we went out for dinner or lunch, it was the same deal.

 

She paid half and she knew nothing about farang ways at all.

 

When things got serious between us, the truth came out. Yes, she was a seller at a market (looked after the store for her Mum when the Mum was busy), but in truth, she was an Accountant that ran her own business for several large condos and was on good contract money.

 

She was a keeper, and I certainly will not let her go. In general, decent hard working people with the right principles will pay.

Perhaps folk have a plan...

[atyclb]

a girl i been out with a few times always brings a gf and she takes it for granted i will pay and its hi end food also. her family gave her a condo and new car and yes university. apparently she does not like to drive alone and/or values the chaperone for appearance sake yet we spend the night together with friend asleep in other room. i get the feeling she is just used to it, spoiled by her parents since she doesn't pursue any other financial tangibles.

 

have gone out with other gals that would not let me pay. still others insisted to share the bill.  depends on the style and her cultural learnings.

 

farang always pays is absolutely false unless you maybe hang out with the ones thatuse and take advantage