Why do farangs come to Thailand if they dislike Thais and "Thainess?"

[Different]

Because those Thai companies working farangs in Thailand are losers who might not get a decent job in their own countries, or probably naive young men who hate life style back home and aren't as good for western women.

[cyril sneer]

45 minutes ago, GinBoy2 said:

You'll get some on here, either the newbies or those so invested they can't escape, that are the classic apologists, even if there was raw sewage in the streets they would retort with 'well why don't you go back from where you came'. That gets old too after after a few years of hearing it over and over.

the apologists are generally a worser group of people than those complaining about thainess

[Wang Lalker]

i am pleased that you brought up the spending, yes i like so many other long term thai residents are now spending our money in neighboring countries and these neighboring countries cambodia laos vietnam all send their whole hearted appreciation to the thai junta for the continuing ongoing massive support that is being bestowed upon them by the ever generous thais. hallelujah brother!

[rumak]

1 hour ago, Jingthing said:

Yep, it ain't paradise.

But neither is your home country, and neither are some other third country options, assuming you can qualify for their visas. (I've researched and considered all of them that I could possibly be able to live in, and I'm still here.)

If you place a high value on loving the culture and you don't love the culture, then Thailand would be out.

But there are always other factors. There are always pros and cons. Everyone has their own personal priorities and contingencies.

So Thailand indeed may be the "best of all possible worlds" for many, and a disastrous tragic choice for others. 

 

As far as adjusting and adaptations, don't discount the power of FILTERING OUT unpleasantness and aggressive avoidance of conflict. That could save your life living here. 

 

Yep,  life for everyone depends on how well they "adjust and adapt".   Sometimes adjusting is just up and leaving !   I don't want to start another post...but am curious to hear from people just where they have lived that they loved the culture ? !   For me it certainly wasn't my home country.   For those that think that if they were RICH they would choose somewhere else,  well.....maybe ,  but many rich and famous don't seem that happy to me  .

[SplitInfinitive]

Expectations too high, leading to disappointment, disillusionment then dislike.

 

[thaibeachlovers]

Asked and answered on many threads already.

Just because one likes living in LOS, it doesn't mean that one has to accept the bad things about the place, and those of us, like me, that have no other place to vent about them will do so on TVF.

[thaibeachlovers]

2 hours ago, Different said:

Because those Thai companies working farangs in Thailand are losers who might not get a decent job in their own countries, or probably naive young men who hate life style back home and aren't as good for western women.

Given you brought it up, IMO western women are too PC and domineering now to have any appeal as marriage potential to many of us.

I had many western female friends, but I'd never have married any of them.

If I was looking to get married again, I'd be looking for a Thai lady.

[Hummin]

Cheap living, easy to stay healthy, love my mornings with coffe at the balcony, and the rest is just what you have to suck up to or leave for another place. 

[scubascuba3]

A lot of negative guys on thaivisa, they should consider going back home if they aren't happy

[opalred]

what gets me is 

why come here to live then get in little groups of there own 

or grumpy old men groups like expats   etc 

[transam]

2 minutes ago, scubascuba3 said:

A lot of negative guys on thaivisa, they should consider going back home if they aren't happy

They could still post here from there chap...

[Jingthing]

10 minutes ago, scubascuba3 said:

A lot of negative guys on thaivisa, they should consider going back home if they aren't happy

So they'd be happy then? 

[canthai55]

Life is all about Attitude - Glass Half Full or Half Empty

Same glass, same amount. You want to be Happy - then be Happy.

The Freedom here is the big drawing card for me - that and my family. But you must get away from the tourist spots to find and be accepted - however much or however little - by Thai people.

Get involved in the community, go to the Temple on Holy days - it is noticed. The Respect you show.

I have learned to let people do what they want way before I came here.

Ride without a helmet - go ahead. Do I like it - no.

I know what 'Up to You' means.

[poanoi]

you're going to have to define 'thainess' before i can say if i dislike it ?

if you thought i will all of a sudden get religious you're so shit out of luck

[GinBoy2]

.....oh and I forgot, another part of Thainess that pisses me off, Mrs Gin's nightly Lakorn!

Although I still have to suffer that in the US, but I banish her to the bedroom to watch it

[Odysseus123]

1 minute ago, GinBoy2 said:

.....oh and I forgot, another part of Thainess that pisses me off, Mrs Gin's nightly Lakorn!

Although I still have to suffer that in the US, but I banish her to the bedroom to watch it

It's nothing  compared to "Sunrise" where Australian banality and their absolute incapacity to think beyond "Jolly Jumbucks" subjects one to hours of funeral insurance,diets (they are grotesquely obese) and cosmetics which is intergalactically astounding-but there you go.

[trainman34014]

6 hours ago, Jingthing said:

I'm somewhat guilty of what the O.P. is saying. I can't relate to "Thainess" at all. My personality is closer to a New Yorker even though I'm not one. I like to speak plainly. I want to complain when it is deserved without people freaking out, and losing face myself, when it's actually the people that have deserved the criticism that should lose face in my POV. The respect for authority without critical thinking truly and deeply grates. It seems ignorant and radically anti-intellectual. Don't get me started on the quality of Thai mass entertainment. OMG!

 

I'm just here (in Pattaya) because it's a poorer man's Miami. The visas are easy, the food is good and cheap, you can buy prescription meds cheaply without prescriptions, I hate cold and snow, etc.

 

I don't have anything against the people here specifically, but again, the culture is a bad fit for me.

 

Every choice is a tradeoff especially if you ain't wealthy. For me the pros have (so far) outweighed the obviously very bad fit with the culture. 

 

I know there are lots of people like me as well. Judge me, or them, harshly if you like. Who cares? 

Spot On i would say !

[scubascuba3]

So they'd be happy then? 

Well, if someone isn't happy they need to make a change that may help. Being negative on here all the time won't help anyone

[Jingthing]

 

24 minutes ago, trainman34014 said:

Spot On i would say !

I'm thinking of starting a "Bad Expats and We Like it That Way" club! 

Come out of the closet, Bad Expats, you'll feel better. 

[DrTuner]

The good old colonial master attitude is the right way to go. Unfortunately, you need the budget of a small country to pull it off right.

[55Jay]

Done to death.  If after all this time, OP is still "confused" by this, then I don't know what to think.

[Puwa]

It's a touchy subject that can not be avoided. I don't often comment on others' lives, real or imagined, but the OP raises the case of not one or two persons, but a phenomenon that shows itself online and offline as well. What's up with these guys and what do I say?

 

While Thailand is a great place to pursue a dream life, a man's true fantasies may not be filled with pleasure or adventure, but darker stuff: misery, regret, envy, paranoia. Living here allows him to assume an air of detached superiority while he grinds away day-to-day.

 

Neither detachment nor superiority comes easy. His attitude is threatened by facts of his everyday life. He often cannot communicate or comprehend Thai, which deals a blow to superiority; he is haunted by bitter memories of past relationships, a corrosive attachment; he feels lost in the culture, unable to navigate; he distrusts others indiscriminately; he guards his wealth like a jealous vulture crouching over a roadside corpse. Battling such threats to his fragile fantasy is a full-time commitment and a lost cause. 

 

Defeat has many faces, and the one we see most is the face of complaint-- whining, whinging, peevish, indignant, cynical, jaded, shrewdly unaware, often stinking of soap and gin. To make his acquaintance-- or merely read his thoughts online--  is to subscribe to an endless lecture series covering his favorite peeves, to wit:

 

Thai men

Thai women, more narrowly, those who float unawares into his orbit

Western women, including those he has known and divorced personally and those he has espied from afar

Young Thai people

Young western people

Women he finds attractive but superficial

Women he finds unattractive regardless of age or nationality

The stocking, cooling, serving, and pricing of beer and other alcoholic beverages 

Hi-So, undefined but roughly means "owns a car"

Low-So, pretty much everyone

Sinsot

All drivers of all motor vehicles

Shop attendants

Muslims

Feminists

Line

The changing racial demography of his country of origin

Thai language

Smartphones

Buddhist monks

"Somchai"

Taxes

Criminals whose punishments aren't harsh enough

Suspects who are not dead yet

Corrupt police

Songkran

Bad girls and good girls

Activists, NGOs, "do-gooders"; equally, scumbags, lowlifes, bad elements

Difficulty in procuring a proper breakfast

Lazy, cunning in-laws, their fields,  livestock

Lazy, cunning spouses, their relatives, opaque inner lives

Lazy, cunning children, stepchildren, grandchildren, uneducated, ungrateful, ignorant

Lazy, cunning girlfriends, who may or may not in fact be prostitutes

Cunning women of all occupations

Stray dogs

Pet dogs

Facebook

***

The list, as you know, goes on.

 

He stays because maintaining the attitude, doing battle, holding forth against his enemies, keeping the beer cold, snorting at the locals, worrying about his dick size-- it's enough to fill a man's day. 

 

Finally, he can like who he likes, hate who he hates, indulge whatever fantasies overtake him. But doesn't Thailand deserve, at the very least, a bit of gratitude for providing the improbable locale for his epic inner battle? Isn't it just decent to make peace with his surroundings and neighbors, the soi dogs and pretty girls? If the answer is yes, then he should try to lighten up on Thailand. If the answer is no, then unfortunately we will note his eventual, lonely demise.

 

 

[DrTuner]

10 minutes ago, Puwa said:

But doesn't Thailand deserve, at the very least, a bit of gratitude for providing the improbable locale for his epic inner battle?

 

Why of course. Not many countries offer such purebred nemesis.

[Wang Lalker]

they dislike Thais and "Thainess?"

yeah its got so bad that even the Thais are leaving so why are you stupid farang still there?

[mauGR1]

Let's be honest, Thailand is failed, and so is the rest of the world.

Same, but different.

I feel so lucky to go back to home country soon, and even more lucky that i'll be back in few months.

[Hummin]

7 hours ago, Wang Lalker said:

 

yeah its got so bad that even the Thais are leaving so why are you stupid farang still there?

 

Most thais (girls) leaving Thailand, miss home, and it is only one thing making them go abroad, and it is moeney, and safety for future. But I guess if you asked them, the majority would like to live in Thailand. 

 

Im a lucky bastard, I can choose almost any country in the world to live in. They do not have that privelege. Not even Thaksin have that. 

[Hummin]

Just now, Hummin said:

Most thais (girls) leaving Thailand, miss home, and it is only one thing making them go abroad, and it is moeney, and safety for future. But I guess if you asked them, the majority would like to live in Thailand. 

 

Im a lucky bastard, I can choose almost any country in the world to live in. They do not have that privelege. Most people in the world have not, Not even Thaksin. 

 

[UPDEHSOI]

18 hours ago, altcar bob said:

No where else to go

Ecuador!!! Much better in every way than that Chithole Thailand.

[meatboy]

anybody know the definition of THAINESS and what it was to represent .wasn't it a few yrs.ago it was supposed to mean everything good about Thailand.and its people

so what about the past few months.

willing to kill for a bag of drugs.

willing to murder anyone who beeps their horn on their car.

willing to murder any member of their family.

willing to rape children including their own.

willing to kill and rob.

willing to kill during road rage.

lie and cheat.

scam.

those who are willing to let someone die,so as not to pull over and let an ambulance through.

then we have all those willing to drink and get drunk and kill their family and innocent drivers.

forgive me if I have missed anything.

 

[BobBKK]

I came here because I early-retired and wanted a place with:

cheap sex, pleasant weather, good infrastructure, good internet, available visas, affordable housing, good hospitals, easy shopping, natural surroundings and easy access to rest of SEA

 

I have to put up with 'Thainess', corruption, selfishness and grumpy farangs.

 

The trade off is worth it in my view.