HIV/STD Scare

[FlyinDutchMan]

Hi everyone,

 

I am really looking for some peace of mind as last night i had a very drunk encounter with a ladyboy. I already went to the clinic and have been given a bunch of information on risks. For now ill leave the STD part since that is not my main concern but right now i'm scared about contracting HIV. It was in chiangmai and the ladyboy is not a regular sex worker but someone hanging out on the street. I was atleast able to ask her how sexually active she was and she told me she's been with only 2 other guys(which i obviously don't know if it's true). She gave a blowjob and i gave anal sex, eventually also without a condom. At the clinic, and on the internet i've seen the risk is about 0,1 - 0,62% of contracting the virus in my specific case, if she carries the virus ofcourse. I'm mainly just looking for people to talk to and maybe some advice as i really don't want to tell anyone i know yet but i'm also slightly freaking out. My plan is to find her tonight and try to get more information pertaining her activity and maybe find out if she's been tested. I also suggested to the clinic to bring her over and have her tested to see if shes clean or not because it's gonna be a while before i can get tested (1 month). I got information about PeP but this sounds pretty intense and i'm doubting if i should get into this. I have to decide within 72 hours. I hope someone here can talk to me.

 

Kind regards.

[beano2274]

I really dont think she is going to give you much information about her status, I would look into the PEP thing. If you leave it too late then you might have major issues later. If you live in Thailand the medicines can be obtained cheaply, but in Europe if no insurance, can be very expensive, maybe whilst you doing nothing check if the Health system in the Netherlands will cover the costs of the tablets.

[bkk6060]

Hey, at least you are honest S... happens.

I would not contact her it will all be a big lie anyway.

Chances are she will not get tested, but even if it is negative she could still be carrying the virus.

Did you use lube? Was there any blood?

If in fact what you said happened, I think the chances are very very slim.

 

But, if she ejaculated inside you, it could be a little more concern.

 

Do the PEP if you are worried. Wouldn't you exchange one month of uncomfort for the rest of your life?

 

PS:  Try to stay off the internet.  It will just create more paranoid feelings and anxiety.

Good luck sorry you are dealing with this.

Edited June 4, 2018 by bkk6060

[sfokevin]

Pursuing her will be a waste of time... 

You have put yourself at risk...

Get to a clinic and get tested and put on Prep ASAP as you have a limit to its effectiveness after exposure ~72 hours

Edited June 4, 2018 by sfokevin

[FlyinDutchMan]

Thanks for your replies. There was no blood and i only gave anal sex, i did not recieve any. There was no lube but a condom before so i guess a tiny bit, it did not feel uncomfortable and it was short. From what im reading so far and what they told me at the clinic the chances are indeed very slim and i'm a little bit calmed down. I've been reading alot about the PEP treatment and i'm torn on wether i should do it, i'll have to decide tonight so i can start it within about 30 hours if i go early tomorrow. The side effects i read about are kinda different from some sources but overall it seems the newer form of PEP is not so intense when it comes to side effects, some people have none at all. I'm just slightly worried about being here alone and maybe feeling sick and having no one to look after me (i read stuff about blindness, hallucinations, dizzyness and very intense headaches), this makes me not want to do it. Also because i'm trying to  get fit and a month of illness will be sh*t. I guess it's nothing compared to the possible long term effects if i have indeed contracted something but i'll have to think about it. The lady at the clinic stating a 0.1 % chance of contracting makes me want to take the risk, my gut says i'll be okay but i'm not sure. I'll have a stressfull night deciding.

[chippendale]

Why would you believe anything a ladyboy tells you? The naivety.

 

Get yourself tested ASAP.

[FlyinDutchMan]

Just now, chippendale said:

Why would you believe anything a ladyboy tells you? The naivety.

 

Get yourself tested ASAP.

Any information could be usefull and i can try to be very objective with judging her honesty. The problem is that the first chance for testing myself is in 4 weeks, aka when it's too late. There is no point in testing now.

[sanemax]

Just now, FlyinDutchMan said:

Any information could be usefull and i can try to be very objective with judging her honesty. The problem is that the first chance for testing myself is in 4 weeks, aka when it's too late. There is no point in testing now.

I do believe that you have to wait two week before you can get tested

[bkk6060]

4 minutes ago, sanemax said:

I do believe that you have to wait two week before you can get tested

I am no expert but have been advised 90 days is the safest amount of time.

[bkk6060]

7 minutes ago, FlyinDutchMan said:

Any information could be usefull and i can try to be very objective with judging her honesty. The problem is that the first chance for testing myself is in 4 weeks, aka when it's too late. There is no point in testing now.

Expect and lot of judgement and negative comments from perfect people.

Just part of being on TV.

[blackcab]

An off topic post has been removed.

[FlyinDutchMan]

3 minutes ago, bkk6060 said:

Expect and lot of judgement and negative comments from perfect people.

Just part of being on TV.

Thanks for your support, much appreciated.

[sanemax]

2 minutes ago, bkk6060 said:

I am no expert but have been advised 90 days is the safest amount of time.

Been informed that after two weeks , the test is quite reliable , but after 2 months, its 100% certain (although there are two different tests , the other one takes a bit longer )

[poanoi]

next time, just lick his balls, have a cold one, and call it a day.

cheers

[Santogold]

The relative risk is low. In all likelihood you are negative. So just get tested and try to be patient about the results (easier said than done, I know). 

 

Asking her what her status is does nothing to change your status nor will it give you peace of mind. If she says she's negative you won't be totally sure so you'll still drive yourself crazy. And asking her to come to the clinic to get tested just for your peace of mind is a crappy thing to do, so just do what you can (get yourself tested) and do your best to be patient.

Edited June 4, 2018 by Santogold

[amexpat]

1 hour ago, Santogold said:

And asking her to come to the clinic to get tested just for your peace of mind is a crappy thing to do......

How so?

[Sheryl]

Don't bother asking her, responses cannot be relied upon. And don't bother getting her tested, people are most infective when newly infected at which point standard antibody tests will not yet be positive...and you do not have time to have her get a PCR.

You can yourself get a PCR test 2 weeks agter the exposure, costs about 5000 baht but better than the 3-6 months it takes to get a definitive answer from an antibody test.

Only you can decide re the PEP but my advice would be to take it assuming you do not have any liver or kidney impairment. This qualifies as a high risk exposure. Granted not as high risk as being the anal recipient but high nonetheless.

Someone who agrees to receiving anal sex from a stranger without a condom is likely to have done so with others too and thus at very elevated risk of HIV. If in early stages of infection/not on ART could be highly infectious. I would give 0 credibility to the "only been with 2 other guys" bit.

Sent from my SM-J701F using Thailand Forum - Thaivisa mobile app

[sanemax]

16 minutes ago, amexpat said:

How so?

Taking a ladyboy off the streets (when they are working ) and taking them off to a hospital to get checked !!!!!!!

  As "she" was on the receiving end , its more likely that he gave her a dose , "she" should be insisting that he gets checked out first

[Dante99]

He should be insisting that he himself gets a frontal lobotomy if not 2 or 3.

[Santogold]

1 hour ago, amexpat said:

How so?

By doing so:

1. He's saying he doesn't feel she is trustworthy
2. It puts her in a situation where she can lose face if she's seen by others

Making her feel like crap so he can feel better (when it has no actual bearing on his HIV status) is unnecessary. Better that he accept the whirlwind of emotions he's experiencing without burdening her. 

Edited June 4, 2018 by Santogold

[amexpat]

2 hours ago, Dante99 said:

He should be insisting that he himself gets a frontal lobotomy if not 2 or 3.

as BKK6060 said:

"

Expect and lot of judgement and negative comments from perfect people.

Just part of being on TV.  "

[FlyinDutchMan]

Thats all right, i'll ignore those worthless comments. I feel incredibly stupid for my actions and it's by far the stupidest thing i've done in my life. Overall i'm doing great and i'll have to deal with this in the best way i can. It's funny how 2 years ago i joked at my friend for being attracted to a ladyboy and now here i am lol, im still amazed when i think about it. Anyway i've been reading up and i've been in contact with the European emergency line, they took my information and will consult my health insurance. Luckily i'm very well insured including for international stuff so i hope they can cut some of my costs for this endavour. They've been very helpfull and so have most of you and i feel a lot calmer now after being able to eat some and being better informed. After your advice i decided not to go looking for the ladyboy and just try to calm down and rest and keep my focus on my travels. Also i contacted the clinic to come by tomorrow again to start the PEP treatment for peace of mind and to prevent any nasty future scenario's. Even if its only for 2 weeks until i can get the PCR test done and hopefully get a negative result so i can stop taking medication, i'm overall really against any type of chemical medication. Again thanks for everyone's help and support, i needed it! Any additional tips or information is more than welcome. For now i have a pretty clear plan on what to do.

Edited June 4, 2018 by FlyinDutchMan

[Hummin]

A good reminder and learning from this, is to have sex when sober, and not after heavy drinking out. Esier to make the right moves and god decissions you will not regret. 

[scubascuba3]

I would get her/him tested, it would give you some peace of mind. Then theres the P24 Antigen test after 2 weeks for you. PEP yes, it will stop you worrying.

Anal with a man has got to be the riskiest thing to do, receiving is the worst but giving also riskier than vaginal sex

[amexpat]

7 hours ago, Hummin said:

A good reminder and learning from this, is to have sex when sober, and not after heavy drinking out. Esier to make the right moves and god decissions you will not regret. 

 

8 hours ago, amexpat said:

as BKK6060 said:

"

Expect and lot of judgement and negative comments from perfect people.

Just part of being on TV.  "

 

[worgeordie]

It could have been worse,he/she could have also robbed you,

regards worgeordie

[FlyinDutchMan]

2 hours ago, worgeordie said:

It could have been worse,he/she could have also robbed you,

regards worgeordie

Yea that's true, i was lucky to just be able to go home with all my stuff.

[Destiny1990]

So tell us how was the sex?

[Juan B Tong]

Seriously, don't you just hate when this happens?

[FlyinDutchMan]

32 minutes ago, Destiny1990 said:

So tell us how was the sex?

Lol, i feel mostly digusted when i think about it, i can't believe i did something like this. I'll keep it at that. I've started the PEP treatment today and feel alot better about everything overall. I let them do some other bloodtests while i was at it and in a couple of weeks i'll do the whole damn package of all STD tests out there. I want to get this all over with a.s.a.p., just forget it about it and never do something stupid like it again. The things i read online are very exaggurated on alot of websites and i got overly paranoid. At the clinic they gave a really good overview of everything and i bombarded them with questions because i've been so paranoid and scared to take medication. In the end i've been told there's very few people who actually get side effects from PEP, atleast the kind they gave me, even the lady helping me used it and told me it was fine and i don't have to be worried. So far i feel a very very light dizzyness but honestly not worth mentioning and i feel something in my stomach, but nothing uncomfortable. If anyone is interested i can give some updates the coming weeks on how it's going. They also told me the first day this is common (some dizzyness and stomach aches), but after i'll probably feel the same as always. Also taking the PCR in 2 weeks is not that usefull and mainly for peace of mind, they suggested i just take the regular test after i finish the PEP treatment in 4 weeks to get a more usefull result. After that the last thing to do is take one more test in 3 months and i'll be good if everything turns out negative. I'm pretty sure this is all i can do right now and the best course of action i could have taken. For the STD part i'll need to have some patience and see if i get any symptoms the coming days/weeks and like i said before i'll take every test there is when i get back home to make sure i'm okay. Again, thanks for all the replies!