Teacher hit my child

[bbabythai]

My baby is 3yrs and 9 months old. She attends a catholic school. She came home today and said that the teacher hit her. My wife asked for a demo how hard. It was a small hit on her shoulder. She was not paying attention to the teacher talking to her friend. 

 

Ive noticed this school is mega strict. Straight hair and straight lines with bags on the back waiting for parents in rows at the end of the day. One morning I witnessed a car pull. Mother and daughter got out of the car and a nun walked up and grabbed the child who was really scared and took her upstairs somewhere. I assume the child must have done something the day prior. 

 

When I drop my baby off in the mornings 1 of the teachers is smiling  but the other 2 are really serious. I think we have to move her to the govt aunobarn school instead. 

 

I would like to say to the 3 teachers tomorrow dont hit my child. But then I worry they might give her a hard time in other ways. Should I let it go as my wife thinks we should or act like a farang from the nanny state where a teacher is not allowed to touch a child at all?

 

thanks

[AlexRich]

That's a difficult one. I watched a video last year about a nursery in Vietnam. A helper had sneaked in a camera and the recording showed some of the teachers slapping and hitting the kids in a sadistic and brutal way. Speak to other families, what do they know? If it's little taps to get their attention then maybe not an issue. Anything else and I'd take the child out ... even the thought of that would make my blood boil. Good luck.

[runforest]

Nothing wrong with a bit of discipline. Sounds like she got a tap. Just imagine if all the kids were playing up and left to their own devices, parents would then be complaining the kid isn't progressing.

 

There is always the option of home schooling and its catching on with responsible parents

[ThreeEyedRaven]

I had something happen at my sons school a while back. I was faced with several options.

1. Do nothing.

2. Complain to the school, which my son begged me not to do.

3. Complain to the cops. yeah, right.

4. Visit the teacher and explain my point of view.

I went with option 4. It was a valuable though painful lesson for the teacher, who never abused a child in his class ever again. At least not while my son was there.

Too many of them think they are untouchable. Do nothing and that mind set will continue.

Whatever you decide to do, do it in such a way the teacher will be too scared to ever even think of doing it again.

Edited July 23, 2018 by ThreeEyedRaven

[helloagain]

Take you kid out of that school and do the same to the teacher. Instant justice. Dont mark her

[helloagain]

Just now, helloagain said:

Take you kid out of that school and do the same to the teacher. Instant justice. Dont mark her

Why the hell are you cathloic with their reputation

[Chassa]

2 minutes ago, helloagain said:

Take you kid out of that school and do the same to the teacher. Instant justice. Dont mark her

Nuns have always been notorious for discipline.

[Falcon]

Why would you let a person hit your child? It doesn’t matter whether at school or outside. For me, the school can tell my son off for doing something wrong but they will never hit him. I would personally go and confront the teacher at line up in the morning and do the confrontation in front of the whole school. I certainly would never just sit down and accept it.

[Bob12345]

19 hours ago, bbabythai said:

It was a small hit on her shoulder.

OKay, to me this does not sound like she was "hit" by the teacher.

The teacher tried to get her attention, did not do it the proper way, but also not smacked your kid around.

In general I would not really have a problem with this, as long as it doesn't happen on a daily.

It becomes a problem when the teacher tries to hurt the kid, and uses violence as a punishment.

 

But what you describe of the school in general would have me worried:

1. religious school is a nono for me, children should be kept away from religion until the age of 18 when they can decide for themselves if they want to be religious or not. Religion is not something for kids.

2. children waiting in strict lines to be picked up: for me this shows the kids are not allowed to be kids. Let them play, get dirty, mess around, they can be marching in strict lines the rest of their lives if they chose to (join the army)

3. a child looking scared of the teacher: children should enjoy school, they should have joy learning and being around friends. If they hate school, there is little chance of them succeeding in school and furthering their education. 

 

I would get my kid out of there immediately, not because of the tap on the shoulder, but because of the three points mentioned.

 

[Bob12345]

1 minute ago, Falcon said:

For me, the school can tell my son off for doing something wrong but they will never hit him.

Mental abuse can be just as bad, and even worse, than physical abuse.

How about they treat the child with respect and do neither?

[scorecard]

18 hours ago, AlexRich said:

That's a difficult one. I watched a video last year about a nursery in Vietnam. A helper had sneaked in a camera and the recording showed some of the teachers slapping and hitting the kids in a sadistic and brutal way. Speak to other families, what do they know? If it's little taps to get their attention then maybe not an issue. Anything else and I'd take the child out ... even the thought of that would make my blood boil. Good luck.

Same thing happens regularly in Thai schools.

[soistalker]

Talk to the teacher. Tell her that you and your wife do not touch the child when disciplining him. And to please not do so. Only verbally chastise the child. This way the child can be disciplined consistently at school and home.

[AlexRich]

35 minutes ago, Chassa said:

Nuns have always been notorious for discipline.

... notorious for sadism.

[Catoni]

1 hour ago, Falcon said:

Why would you let a person hit your child? It doesn’t matter whether at school or outside. For me, the school can tell my son off for doing something wrong but they will never hit him. I would personally go and confront the teacher at line up in the morning and do the confrontation in front of the whole school. I certainly would never just sit down and accept it.

If they used the strap like we used to in Canadian schools years ago, yes I would let them hit my kid if my kid did something to deserve it.  Our schools used to use rubberized fabric belting, about 16 inches long and about 2 - 3 inches wide. About four to eight fast hits on each hand .... your hands felt like they were on fire afterwards. Very painful. And if you did something really bad, they had you wash your hands in very warm water first. Softens the skin. A teacher or principle or v.p. good with the strap hit your hands in such a way that the end of the strap flipped around and got the back of your hand also.

   If they had to strap you, there was always an extra witness to the punishment, an official form filled out, and your parents notified that corporal punishment had been inflicted on the kid. Female staff would inflict the punishment on girls if need be.

   Never had to be used very often. We tended to be very well behaved in school. And for good reason. We referred to our teachers, principles and vice principles as “sir” or “mam”.   I only got the strap twice all through my years in elementary school. The way many kids behave in schools in Canada these days with no real consequences...makes some of us wish for a return of corporal punishment... the strap or something similar.

   The good ‘ole days. 

Edited July 24, 2018 by Catoni
Addition

[Quack]

Let's face it Thai schools are crap anyway so the main benefit is learning basic literacy and other skills, and how to socialize and have fun with kids their own age. They're not going to have any fun at such a strict school like this! No way would I send my child there.

 

And if any teacher ever hits my child (hasn't happened yet, still a baby) they will be very sorry they did.

[manchega]

take a look at parts of europe where abuse in religious schools happened , 

 

now look at thailand, not only are the people behind in how they think , the whole country is actually 50 - 100 years behind, thus you ahve sent your child to a catholic school?

 

you nutter, you might as well spend your days teaching the child that dragons majic and unicorns are real.  

[Cereal]

Yep, me too growing up in Germany and Canada. There was also the not so subtle threat of dad when you got home if you'd been bad enough to get the strap.

 

Most parents these days pussy their kids so badly it's not a surprise they grow up wimps and crybabies. 

 

University kids needing safe spaces cuz they've been offended.

 

Hahahahaha.....

[Colabamumbai]

1 hour ago, Catoni said:

If they used the strap like we used to in Canadian schools years ago, yes I would let them hit my kid if my kid did something to deserve it.  Our schools used to use rubberized fabric belting, about 16 inches long and about 2 - 3 inches wide. About four to eight fast hits on each hand .... your hands felt like they were on fire afterwards. Very painful. And if you did something really bad, they had you wash your hands in very warm water first. Softens the skin. A teacher or principle or v.p. good with the strap hit your hands in such a way that the end of the strap flipped around and got the back of your hand also.

   If they had to strap you, there was always an extra witness to the punishment, an official form filled out, and your parents notified that corporal punishment had been inflicted on the kid. Female staff would inflict the punishment on girls if need be.

   Never had to be used very often. We tended to be very well behaved in school. And for good reason. We referred to our teachers, principles and vice principles as “sir” or “mam”.   I only got the strap twice all through my years in elementary school. The way many kids behave in schools in Canada these days with no real consequences...makes some of us wish for a return of corporal punishment... the strap or something similar.

   The good ‘ole days. 

My father threatened to call the police if it happened again, teacher punched me so hard I went over the desk. Catholic School , Holy Name, Danforth and Withrow,  Toronto 1960's and I did get the strap from the principal. The head Nun we called her. I sold the most donuts every year, and got a good book. I can feel the stinging hands now.

 

[The Deerhunter]

1 hour ago, Catoni said:

If they used the strap like we used to in Canadian schools years ago, yes I would let them hit my kid if my kid did something to deserve it.  Our schools used to use rubberized fabric belting, about 16 inches long and about 2 - 3 inches wide. About four to eight fast hits on each hand .... your hands felt like they were on fire afterwards. Very painful. And if you did something really bad, they had you wash your hands in very warm water first. Softens the skin. A teacher or principle or v.p. good with the strap hit your hands in such a way that the end of the strap flipped around and got the back of your hand also.

   If they had to strap you, there was always an extra witness to the punishment, an official form filled out, and your parents notified that corporal punishment had been inflicted on the kid. Female staff would inflict the punishment on girls if need be.

   Never had to be used very often. We tended to be very well behaved in school. And for good reason. We referred to our teachers, principles and vice principles as “sir” or “mam”.   I only got the strap twice all through my years in elementary school. The way many kids behave in schools in Canada these days with no real consequences...makes some of us wish for a return of corporal punishment... the strap or something similar.

   The good ‘ole days. 

I spent 5 years at a Presbyterian school in another colonial country.  The cane and or strap were used every day.   Many times every day!!!!   Eventually I advised my father I would refuse to attend in the new year so I finished my education in a State school.  The Catholic schools were known to be much more brutal.  I hated my years at school.  I cannot imagine how anyone could have enjoyed that place but I had a cousin a few years older than me and he loved his time there as did others I met.  But for me the "masters" were brutal and obsessed with sport and the bullying culture between students was epic.  To make matters worse as a private school the masters needed no education qualifications, just a Uni degree in their subject so many were abysmal teachers. I.only ever one good one teacher there.  I still remember his full name.  Religious schools? No way.

Edited July 24, 2018 by The Deerhunter

[androokery]

I would say, if you choose a catholic school, you only have yourself to blame. Get your child out of there. ASAP.

[marcusarelus]

I've never seen Catholic nuns at a school in Thailand.  Where are they?  Where do they come from?  Do they speak English?  Are they certified teachers? 

[NoshowJones]

3 hours ago, helloagain said:

Take you kid out of that school and do the same to the teacher. Instant justice. Dont mark her

If you are saying use violence on the teacher, then no, you will end up in jail, I would if it was in the UK and the teacher was male, and no witnesses, but in Thailand never, better let your wife handle it.

[Cake Monster]

20 hours ago, ThreeEyedRaven said:

I had something happen at my sons school a while back. I was faced with several options.

1. Do nothing.

2. Complain to the school, which my son begged me not to do.

3. Complain to the cops. yeah, right.

4. Visit the teacher and explain my point of view.

I went with option 4. It was a valuable though painful lesson for the teacher, who never abused a child in his class ever again. At least not while my son was there.

Too many of them think they are untouchable. Do nothing and that mind set will continue.

Whatever you decide to do, do it in such a way the teacher will be too scared to ever even think of doing it again.

I decided to take the option 2 as posted above, and had a very heated meeting with the Head of Department at the School.

However, I went with the attitude that if the Teacher was not removed from my childs class within 2 days , I would return with a lawyer, and I would bury the School in a legal S#%t storm.

I must point out that my child was hit with a metal 12 Inch rule across the arm, and that blood was drawn from the wound. This tactic worked for m, as the Teacher was removed from not only my childs class, but also from that section of the School, and has never returned to that section to this day ( 5 Years now ).

The one thing that all of these Schools hate is bad rep. They are a business, and any bad rep and loss of " Face " really bites them very hard, and the powers that be would virtually do anything not to loose face and gain a bad rep.

 

[Media1]

Simply walk in and take hold of the teacher by the ear

Tell her never touch my daughter thank you

And release

[phkauf]

Catholic schools are very strict, but there should be some boundaries. I'll never forget my 1 year in a Catholic HS with the Brothers. Some of those guys were like amateur boxers. I got popped in the chest once for laughing in class (never did that again) and one of my classmates got an uppercut that knocked him clean off his chair. And that kid's father was the Chairman of one of the biggest banks in the US - so no favoritism at all. Let's see how that would play out here in Thailand.

[Lucky mike]

I see with less and less corporate punishment in the home and at school behaviour in my opinion has not improved in fact has got worse !  As long as the punishment fits the deed....

[androokery]

1 hour ago, disambiguated said:

It's irresponsible parents like this who're responsible for the decline in discipline, standards, and general civility, worldwide.

 

If my teacher's didn't hit me when I deserved it, my parents would've complained.  Thus, I learned manners at an early age.

It’s apparent that by hitting children you, in many cases, inflict permanent brain damage. This is clearly in display here, as the victims of this abuse demonstrate by advocating violence against children in their turn. This sadistic cycle needs to stop. No, you didn’t turn out great. No, the abuse you suffered as a child did not breed civility in you. It made you an advocate of child abuse. And that is horrible. 

[DJ54]

23 hours ago, ThreeEyedRaven said:

I had something happen at my sons school a while back. I was faced with several options.

1. Do nothing.

2. Complain to the school, which my son begged me not to do.

3. Complain to the cops. yeah, right.

4. Visit the teacher and explain my point of view.

I went with option 4. It was a valuable though painful lesson for the teacher, who never abused a child in his class ever again. At least not while my son was there.

Too many of them think they are untouchable. Do nothing and that mind set will continue.

Whatever you decide to do, do it in such a way the teacher will be too scared to ever even think of doing it again.

4 Ian good advise..... also round table with teacher or teachers on what  be more constructive. Also if a child is causing issues tell them to contact you .... 

[tomas557]

23 hours ago, ThreeEyedRaven said:

4. Visit the teacher and explain my point of view.

I went with option 4. It was a valuable though painful lesson for the teacher, who never abused a child in his class ever again

John Rambo is that you?

 

So you think abuse of people is ok for you, and you want us all to believe you got away with it.

 

Have another drink man, guess you are also ex sas in the bars.

[Byron Allen Black]

5 hours ago, Chassa said:

Nuns have always been notorious for discipline.

I had one break a wooden ruler on the back of my hands in 1948. I was 7 years old. Can't remember what I did wrong but haven't forgotten the hit.

 

I also remember them telling the boys never to pull the foreskin back and wash the glans penis. Presumably to forestall the peril of pleasure. Masturbation = NO, smell, infection, cancer = GOD'S WILL