Is that a prophecy, or an ingredient?

 

Do you know the famous French general who stepped on a land mine?

Napoleon Blown Apart.

27 minutes ago, roo860 said:

I would like to see you about your offer!  I just hope you have turned over a new leaf since your last outing!

30 minutes ago, fangless said:

I would like to see you about your offer!  I just hope you have turned over a new leaf since your last outing!

I didn't see that coming.

48 minutes ago, ballpoint said:

I didn't see that coming.

It was hiding under a punnet!

 

 

 

When I told my contractor I didn't want carpeted steps ...

they gave me a blank stare.

54 minutes ago, Hamus Yaigh said:

When I told my contractor I didn't want carpeted steps ...

they gave me a blank stare.

 

I would tread carefully if I was you or you might get carpeted after all.

2 hours ago, sanuk711 said:

It has been said that people own dogs, but cats own people. 

9 hours ago, billd766 said:

It has been said that people own dogs, but cats own people. 

 

I have both of them and can confirm this is very true.. ????

 

 

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Wife's Diary

Tonight, I thought my husband was acting weird. We had made plans to meet at a nice restaurant for dinner.

I was shopping with my friends all day long, so I thought he was upset at the fact that I was a bit late, but he made no comment on

it. Conversation wasn't flowing so I suggested that we go somewhere quiet so we could talk. He agreed, but he didn't say much.

I asked him what was wrong. He said "nothing". I asked him if it was my fault that he was upset. He said he wasn't upset, that it had nothing to do with me, and not to worry about it.

On the way home, I told him that I loved him. He smiled slightly and kept driving. I can't explain his behavior. I don't know why he didn't say "I love you too".

When we got home, I felt as if I had lost him completely, as if he wanted nothing to do with me anymore. He just sat there quietly.

Finally, with silence all around us, I decided to go to bed. About 15 minutes later, he came to bed. But I still felt that he was distracted, and his thoughts were somewhere else. He fell asleep, I cried. I don't know what to do. I'm almost sure that his thoughts

are with someone else. My life is a disaster.

 

Husband's Diary:

A two-foot putt ------ who on earth misses a two-foot putt?!?!?

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One for Fangless...................................

 

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