This ones for the married guys, are you still happily married ?

[Davo369]

27 minutes ago, roo860 said:

'Makes a he'll of a lot of noise '.

So, you're marrying a bloke?

????

Na... definitely not a geezer. She makes that sloppy noise 

[AlexRich]

2 hours ago, Davo369 said:

I was happily married for six months, then the next six months was a complete nightmare. I had to pursue the last six months because i had a £100 bet that i would last a whole year. But that was many years ago in the uk. Now I've meet a wonderful woman in Thailand we get married next month. The only thing what annoys me is when she's giving me a blxw job she makes a he'll of a lot of noise ????

 

That will be her gag reflex ... lol.

[bkk6060]

I have been married, but never here.

Got out of it in the states she had a good job so escaped with my full pension.

Just my observation of the guys I know in Pattaya married mostly to bar girls.

The continued party and drinking of the girls with their friends seems to be a constant struggle.  On the other side, every last one of the guys hit up Soi 6 a few times a month.  No judgement either way just sayin it does not seem like an easy road.  Being in Pattaya with all the temptation doesn't help.

I know a couple of guys married in Chiang Mai.  They seem happier and more relaxed then those in Pattaya. Seems the environment may be a contributing factor to success.

Edited January 21, 2020 by bkk6060

[AlexRich]

1 hour ago, BritManToo said:

So you don't believe in free will or personal choices? it's all preordained?

No point in going to school, looking for work, or making any personal efforts in life at all.

That strategy appears to have worked for you?

[OneMoreFarang]

14 hours ago, 4MyEgo said:

who said you can take the girl out of the bar, but not the bar out of the girl ?

 

If someone bumps into the guy that made that statement, pull him aside and slap him across the face twice for me, as his saying is totally wrong.

BS! Obviously there are some girls who forget the bar and the bar behavior. But there are many girls who, it seems, will never completely leave that part of their life behind them.

 

Obviously my gf is different, and she forgot the bar. But she worked only a few weeks in a bar and was never exited about that job. Her big sister decided that's what she should do. She was happy to leave the bar.

 

As a rule of thumb I think it's a good idea to assume any girl who worked in that business for years won't forget it anytime soon. Thinking otherwise might be so called positive thinking but unfortunately it is unrealistic.

That does not mean bar girls are never good girlfriends or good wives. But they think often like bar girls. Which is no surprise with their extensive experience often with hundreds of guys.

[Kwasaki]

3 hours ago, CharlieH said:

Yes, only wish I had found her sooner and didn't have to go through all that <deleted> with the Western women first. 

 

14 years have passed so fast.

 

Go Asian you"ll never go back Caucasian ! ????????

I concur, taken my words already, 20 years for me 17 years married.

Hope my youngest son does the same, too late for the older 2 although 1 seems to be OK.

[4MyEgo]

1 hour ago, villagefarang said:

I spent two decades as a single guy in the nightlife of Bangkok and I have personally witnessed a vast number of failed attempts at domesticating ladies of the night.  To be fair it is not always entirely the girls fault.  Very few guys possess the required skillset to rehabilitate a dedicated prostitute, even when she is interested in changing.  Combine a clueless guy with a feckless, uncommitted working girl and you have a better chance of winning the lottery.

 

While I am very happy for the OP, not every guy can find happiness, even in less challenging relationships.  Generalizations can provide helpful guidelines for the uninitiated but in the end each relationship is a unique blend of two individuals.  Some couples succeed and some fail, and it is very hard to know in advance who the winners will be.

Well summed up and pretty much on the money, that said, money in my opinion is the key, it is the only power we guys have, all females want a guy with money or a big schnauzer, or both if they can get it....lol

 

While my wife I believe is the perfect partner, there is no chance in heaven that I would allow her anywhere near my life savings, that said, she has prospered along the way and has achieved what most Thai's woman with her secondary school couldn't achieve in their lifetime, when I am gone she will get the lot.

 

The above said, I have seen on two many occasions guys just handing it all over to their loved ones who don't know the first thing about control or investment vs return etc etc and it's not long before its all gone, so best to leave the power to those that know best and if the female is always talking about money, then she's not really interested in the guy, or his schnauzer ????

 

[Saltire]

Only regret is not discovering Thai ladies when I was younger. I wouldn't have wasted 20 years with a western alcoholic, chain-smoking, neurotic, non-bar girl in the dreary UK.

 

Made it official last year after living for 3 years here in her village. The registrar in the amphur offered me 5 minutes to change my mind before signing, asking 'are you sure?' I was and am still 100% sure. Yes we both miss the bars sometimes but that's what holidays are for, right?

 

I had almost given up on finding a caring, honest, loyal, funny, thrifty (yes thrifty) partner. Thank you Thailand.

 

 

 

 

 

[4MyEgo]

54 minutes ago, OneMoreFarang said:

Obviously my gf is different, and she forgot the bar. But she worked only a few weeks in a bar and was never exited about that job. Her big sister decided that's what she should do. She was happy to leave the bar.

I think it all boils down to need, I mean if a girl, "bar girl" had money, I don't think you would see her working in a bar, think about it, if she had a good education, e.g. parents could afford to send her to university to better her job prospects, then there would be no need for the "bar girl" job, right.

 

I have been with my fair share of bar girls, most want to be with a farang to take care them, and sometimes the family if not most times, nothing different to most western woman, albeit if they are career minded and want to grow balls to make a point as opposed to taking care of their family. 

 

All the bar girls I have been with knew I was married to one, no point in lying, strictly business, with wife's consent, believe it or not, up to you, anyways, they told me that they didn't like being there, but had to support their parents, kids back home, etc etc, all from Issan, and didn't want to take the other alternative, like working in a factory in Bangkok for 250-300 baht per day and to have to share a room with 4-8 others, it just didn't cut it, suffice to say, if they were lucky enough to be able to have a few drinks with a farang at a bar, get him pay the bar fine and take her for short, the girl could land upwards of 2,000 baht for a days work, I know what work I would be doing if I was in that situation, albeit I wouldn't like it either, all jokes aside.

 

Some try to make a profession of it and it comes back to bite them, others like my wife who worked in the bar scene at her sisters bar for 7 months was lucky to be selective and to get out while she could, no job prospects for her back home in Issan, poor family looking after her 2 year old twin boys while she and her sisters sent money back to them.

 

Prior to the bar scene she had an abusive X partner back in Bangkok where she worked in a factory, so she upped and left him, put one kid under each arm, got on the bus from Bangkok all the way to Udon Thani, i.e. about a 10 hour night trip. The X partner has since had 4 other partners and 2 kids to each partner, he is nowhere to be found, someone should take him out because he has created one hell of a mess !

 

Life is tough for woman here, I don't look down at "bar girls" I won't label them as prostitutes, it's just wrong to use such a harsh degrading word, which is similar to a racist slur, like <deleted>, dago, curry eater, slop head, etc, etc, and not because my wife was a "bar gir", it's a job she chose to do to support her kids, and good on her for having the courage to seek a better life through that opportunity, it worked.

 

I look at my wife's 3 sisters, all without partners, all have children, all worked in the bar scene, and now live day by day off the land, because they couldn't control the money, wanting to show that Thai status, besides, most Thai guys are the pits, these women have little if any prospects with Thai guys, too old to work in bars, fortunately some of the money they made building mum and dad a big house for all to live in, but nothing put aside to look at further educating.

 

They must look at their sister as one lucky Cinderella bitch ????

 

[BritManToo]

34 minutes ago, 4MyEgo said:

I think it all boils down to need, I mean if a girl, "bar girl" had money, I don't think you would see her working in a bar,

If a woman (or should that be single moms?) didn't need/want money, I don't think any of us would have younger wives or girlfriends.

My 22 year old Thai step daughter (very pretty slim and perfectly shaped) has never had a boyfriend or even kissed a guy, she says, "I don't need a bf, you already pay for everything".

Edited January 21, 2020 by BritManToo

[OneMoreFarang]

2 minutes ago, BritManToo said:

My 22 year old Thai step daughter has never had a boyfriend or even kissed a guy, she says, "I don't need a bf, you already pay for everything".

Is it possible that that is what "papa" wants to hear?

Imagine she would tell you how many guys she not only kissed. Are you sure you want to know?

[BritManToo]

Just now, OneMoreFarang said:

Is it possible that that is what "papa" wants to hear?

Imagine she would tell you how many guys she not only kissed. Are you sure you want to know?

All her school pals have been walking around holding babies since age 15, I think I would have noticed.

She does do sleep overs with girls though.

[OneMoreFarang]

36 minutes ago, 4MyEgo said:

I think it all boils down to need, I mean if a girl, "bar girl" had money, I don't think you would see her working in a bar, think about it, if she had a good education, e.g. parents could afford to send her to university to better her job prospects, then there would be no need for the "bar girl" job, right.

 

I have been with my fair share of bar girls, most want to be with a farang to take care them, and sometimes the family if not most times, nothing different to most western woman, albeit if they are career minded and want to grow balls to make a point as opposed to taking care of their family. 

 

All the bar girls I have been with knew I was married to one, no point in lying, strictly business, with wife's consent, believe it or not, up to you, anyways, they told me that they didn't like being there, but had to support their parents, kids back home, etc etc, all from Issan, and didn't want to take the other alternative, like working in a factory in Bangkok for 250-300 baht per day and to have to share a room with 4-8 others, it just didn't cut it, suffice to say, if they were lucky enough to be able to have a few drinks with a farang at a bar, get him pay the bar fine and take her for short, the girl could land upwards of 2,000 baht for a days work, I know what work I would be doing if I was in that situation, albeit I wouldn't like it either, all jokes aside.

 

Some try to make a profession of it and it comes back to bite them, others like my wife who worked in the bar scene at her sisters bar for 7 months was lucky to be selective and to get out while she could, no job prospects for her back home in Issan, poor family looking after her 2 year old twin boys while she and her sisters sent money back to them.

 

Prior to the bar scene she had an abusive X partner back in Bangkok where she worked in a factory, so she upped and left him, put one kid under each arm, got on the bus from Bangkok all the way to Udon Thani, i.e. about a 10 hour night trip. The X partner has since had 4 other partners and 2 kids to each partner, he is nowhere to be found, someone should take him out because he has created one hell of a mess !

 

Life is tough for woman here, I don't look down at "bar girls" I won't label them as prostitutes, it's just wrong to use such a harsh degrading word, which is similar to a racist slur, like <deleted>, dago, curry eater, slop head, etc, etc, and not because my wife was a "bar gir", it's a job she chose to do to support her kids, and good on her for having the courage to seek a better life through that opportunity, it worked.

 

I look at my wife's 3 sisters, all without partners, all have children, all worked in the bar scene, and now live day by day off the land, because they couldn't control the money, wanting to show that Thai status, besides, most Thai guys are the pits, these women have little if any prospects with Thai guys, too old to work in bars, fortunately some of the money they made building mum and dad a big house for all to live in, but nothing put aside to look at further educating.

 

They must look at their sister as one lucky Cinderella bitch ????

 

Obviously some girls work to support their family and/or kids. But realistically they could and should make more in one week bar work than in a factory job. So the question is: why do they work the whole month?

Lots of girls spend lots of money on the newest phones, the bike of their boyfriends, party life, drugs, etc. That's obviously up to them if they want to do that. But they still tell that sob story to anybody who wants to hear it.

[Pravda]

16 minutes ago, BritManToo said:

If a woman (or should that be single moms?) didn't need/want money, I don't think any of us would have younger wives or girlfriends.

My 22 year old Thai step daughter (very pretty slim and perfectly shaped) has never had a boyfriend or even kissed a guy, she says, "I don't need a bf, you already pay for everything".

But to be fair she's probably lying to your face as you have said it many times you can never trust a woman. 

 

But I'm sure yours (stepdaughter) is different ????

Edited January 21, 2020 by Pravda

[Ventenio]

I don't think I'll ever understand marriage, but we all have our different perspectives - shaped by our own experiences.

 

1.  Money.  I'm not supporting another human just to be my friend

2.  The fun part gets old after MONTHS, so see Number 1.  You become friends and then have kids to just to be "important".

3.  Freedom.  I don't want anyone having a say in what I do, and If I say NO too many times I lose my money and have less happiness.

 

I'm all for lots of friends, lots of fun, get some pets as well, sure go teach kids and smile.....

 

but marriage?  LOL

 

it's just not for me

[4MyEgo]

29 minutes ago, OneMoreFarang said:

Obviously some girls work to support their family and/or kids. But realistically they could and should make more in one week bar work than in a factory job. So the question is: why do they work the whole month?

Lots of girls spend lots of money on the newest phones, the bike of their boyfriends, party life, drugs, etc. That's obviously up to them if they want to do that. But they still tell that sob story to anybody who wants to hear it.

I suppose they all want the finer things in life too, albeit their boyfriends, husbands, some that own the bar too, and you gotta love a good sob story, been a while since I saw "gone with the wind"

[BritManToo]

20 minutes ago, Ventenio said:

1.  Money.  I'm not supporting another human just to be my friend

2.  The fun part gets old after MONTHS, so see Number 1.  You become friends and then have kids to just to be "important".

3.  Freedom.  I don't want anyone having a say in what I do, and If I say NO too many times I lose my money and have less happiness.

1. Me neither, they had duties, and friendship isn't one of them.

2. Not found that, I'm entirely happy banging away with just the one.

3. Freedom's just another word for 'nothing left to lose'.

Edited January 21, 2020 by BritManToo

[Pedrogaz]

Supremely happy.....but I have had to make some adjustments in my way of dealing with things. I was a take control kinda guy, now I just let there get on with things.

[zyphodb]

Nine years and counting, both still happy together...

[Stocky]

Met my wife 23 years ago, been married 14 years next month. We've had our fair share of ups and down; most days you'd ask we'd say we're happy, but there are certainly times when we're not - that's life.

[4MyEgo]

23 minutes ago, Ventenio said:

I don't think I'll ever understand marriage, but we all have our different perspectives - shaped by our own experiences.

 

1.  Money.  I'm not supporting another human just to be my friend

2.  The fun part gets old after MONTHS, so see Number 1.  You become friends and then have kids to just to be "important".

3.  Freedom.  I don't want anyone having a say in what I do, and If I say NO too many times I lose my money and have less happiness.

 

I'm all for lots of friends, lots of fun, get some pets as well, sure go teach kids and smile.....

 

but marriage?  LOL

 

it's just not for me

I see some of your points, however, to best answer:

 

1) I take pride in seeing my wife, (as the beautiful human being that she is), enjoying the stressless life that I have provided to her (financially & emotionally) since we met, and I on the other hand, enjoy the journey she has provided me with, e.g. all of her love, cuddles, kisses, praises on a daily basis, friends cannot provide that for me, regardless if she says love you long time.......lol

 

2) The fun has never worn off for us, we still laugh daily, joke constantly, rarely do we argue, and I say that because that is how it is, and with having kids, her twin boys from her X and our 2 girls from our marriage, we don't feel important, we just enjoy the giving and playing the roles of teachers and dictators, as for how the kids feel, well I guess "important" to always have two parents telling them what to do and how to do it.....yes sir, no sir, 3 bags full sir....... lol, seriously, we all enjoy each others company, just the other day, I said to the boys (15), mum and I and the girls are going out for a drive and to have lunch, the castle's yours, enjoy, no, no, wait Papa, we coming too, now what teenagers at 15 want to go out with their parents to have a cheap 50 baht lunch ????

 

3) Freedom, nothing has changed since before I was single, I go out when I want, for how long I want,  I am not a child for my wife to say NO to me, actually, you might find this strange, she encourages me to go out, albeit it I am out at the local waterhole 3 nights a week for 3 or so hours at a time, just the other day she said, honey why don't you go to Phuket for a week and see your sweethearts, been there, done that a few times, if I want a quick one, I know where to go locally, fact of the matter is I enjoy my family life, kids and all, during the day, it's me and the Mrs doing our own thing, interacting when we want too, not far from each other, either her in the garden, me on the laptop or watching TV, we laugh, play the same games 3 times a day for 13 years, sex on the dining table if horny which is most days, and then prepare for the onslaught at 4.30pm when 4 hungry kids walk through those doors, repeat the next day, and if your thinking her telling me to go out or to stay in Phuket for a week, is because she might be getting some on the side, never crossed my mind and she is welcome to get some on the side, actually I find it healthy, not an issue, sex is like a sweet to me, you digest it, and only eat when you need too, but too much of any sweet is bad for you, so in moderation, that is, unless the Mrs is baking cake too often at home.

 

Like you said, marriage is not for you, we all strive to find the perfect partner, first one for me was all wrong, I was young and gullible, this one was made to order, and hasn't malfunctioned, so I guess you haven't found that girl that you just cannot be without, yet, who knows you might not, and growing old without being someone to love and be loved, for me, would be just awful, friends come, friends go, jealousy, lies, etc etc, friends are to fill in the gaps for me, i.e. time, the wife and the kids are there to fill in the rest of the gaps in my life, wouldn't have it any other way, Buddha willing.

[RichardColeman]

1st Thai wife I divorced - much to her money grabbing families shame. 2nd Thai wife - perfect, never asks for a penny, great mother to our daughter, great cook, and well on the way to being fully trained in other important matters ????

[OneMoreFarang]

31 minutes ago, Pedrogaz said:

Supremely happy.....but I have had to make some adjustments in my way of dealing with things. I was a take control kinda guy, now I just let there get on with things.

Is that a nice way of saying: you do what she tells you to do and maybe sometimes she gives you the impression it's your own will?

[boonchu]

35 years and still together. She has worked hard in our business in Australia, now we are retired and enjoying the fruits of our labour.

[sipi]

My wife and I are happily married.

I'm happy and she's married.

[sirineou]

6 hours ago, GinBoy2 said:

Yeah, still very happy with my Thai wife, not a ex bar girl so so didn't have that dynamic going on.

But we've been together over 10 years, in Singapore where we met, Thailand and now back in the US. Actually just doing the math, it's closer to 20 years, dammit, it's 20 years in 2024

 

But I also have a very close relationship with my ex wife, close enough that we can all spend holidays together with our kids my ex wife and her current boyfriend, my American daughters and Thai son, plus the bf's son and daughter

 

I don't think that kind of figuring things out, is as rare as people would believe

You are a lucky man. 

I have a close relationship with my ex-wife also, We have a daughter together and we are both very active in our Daughters life, and as such we are in constant contact,  see each other on holidays, B-days etc. 

Thai wife feels very threatened by her, and would be happy if I had nothing to do with my ex. She just does not get it that even though we are not married, we can still be friends.  

 Anyway, other than that, and a few other things, LOL, Being together 13 years and married 10 years. don't get me wrong. we do have our moments, but I could not imagine a life without my Thai wife. Other than my Daughter, best thing that ever happened to me.

[natway09]

20 years with a beautiful "bar" girl. All good.

My kids love her as well which is great

 

[Darkside Gray]

Well Im still married?

[GinBoy2]

16 minutes ago, sirineou said:

You are a lucky man. 

I have a close relationship with my ex-wife also, We have a daughter together and we are both very active in our Daughters life, and as such we are in constant contact,  see each other on holidays, B-days etc. 

Thai wife feels very threatened by her, and would be happy if I had nothing to do with my ex. She just does not get it that even though we are not married, we can still be friends.  

 Anyway, other than that, and a few other things, LOL, Being together 13 years and married 10 years. don't get me wrong. we do have our moments, but I could not imagine a life without my Thai wife. Other than my Daughter, best thing that ever happened to me.

Yeah it can be tough.

 

My ex's boyfriend had a hard time accepting that I could just be a 'Bestie', sex not included.

 

But he figured it out. 

 

So while we will probably never be soul buddies we can hang out without any problems 

[Tchooptip]

8 hours ago, CharlieH said:

Yes, only wish I had found her sooner and didn't have to go through all that <deleted> with the Western women first. 

 

14 years have passed so fast.

 

Go Asian you"ll never go back Caucasian ! ????????

"Yes, only wish I had found her sooner and didn't have to go through all that <deleted> with the Western women first" 

The best comment I can find is this one????