Do you ever think about the family that left you behind

[steven100]

7 minutes ago, ivor bigun said:

as i do my uncles ,we were close when i was young ,

same me ... I stayed with them on the farm and worked for several years,  but they're all dead now

 

 

 

Edited September 12, 2022 by steven100

[steven100]

15 minutes ago, steven100 said:

same me ... I stayed with them on the farm and worked for several years,  but they're all dead now

 

 

 

you know ....  in reality, I relished those years 

[BigStar]

4 hours ago, Mac Mickmanus said:

In this day and age , you can talk to anyone in the World live face to face by pressing a few buttons 

'Course, at present the dead aunties, uncles. cousins aren't in the world, technically speaking. Suddenly I'm hearing Calling Elvis.

 

 

Edited September 12, 2022 by BigStar

[simon43]

I sometimes think of my old dad, who died about 13 years ago.  We were never close, but I respect him for his values.

 

More recent, I think every day about my 18 year old Thai niece who died in my arms from TB just 3 months ago. I am comforted by considering her passing from a Buddhist perspective, in that she has moved on to another life. I have a photo on my table of her just a few days before she died, when I carried her into a local restaurant and she ate some moo gata with me.  It's a good memory ????

Edited September 13, 2022 by simon43

[chalawaan]

21 hours ago, steven100 said:

haha ... where's that laughing emoji ...

You can pull emoji from your phone keyboard ???????????? Maybe older computers don't have this functionality? 

Also, I have one loser kid sister, and a really decent second cousin, Dave, who tracked me down using a DNA site. The rest were oxygen theives, except there was a nice auntie who unfortunately, I believed my sisters propaganda until it was too late. 

But her kids are losers too. 

My dad was a bit of a neo nazi, so that's why I'm a lefty now. Tho I was as bad as he was growing up, then I started to think and read, and wised up a bit. 

[JayClay]

21 hours ago, Mac Mickmanus said:

In this day and age , you can talk to anyone in the World live face to face by pressing a few buttons 

What technology exactly are you using to contact the dead?

[steven100]

6 hours ago, simon43 said:

Thai niece who died in my arms from TB just 3 months ago

yes .... very sad indeed.  I have a close Thai friend who contracted TB about 10 years ago,  I went around to see him one afternoon at his sisters and the family were there just thinking he ate something bad or caught some bug somewhere .... I tell you he was really sick, and I could see that ... I told them to get him to a hospital straight away, I said he's not good, so they heeded my words and took him straight to hospital. Anyway, turns out he got TB and spent a week in hospital. To this day I'm so glad I went to see him because he wouldn't have seen the night out. 

[steven100]

13 minutes ago, JayClay said:

What technology exactly are you using to contact the dead?

it's either got to be mental telepathy or necromancy  ...    Lol

[thaibeachlovers]

On 9/12/2022 at 10:42 PM, steven100 said:

I'm sitting here after my 5th bottle of Federbrau and once again thinking about my dead aunties, uncles. cousins and family that are all dead and gone,  they have all died long ago and I didn't get to see them in the later years of their life due to work or whatever.  I think about how sad things are that i didn't go see them for a day or overnight visit. I don't have anyone else anymore, they're all dead .....    its just me ... I think about this every day constantly.  They're all gone.  

Do you ever think about your dead relatives ?

just curious if you think about that also ..... 

My father traveled the world and I was not born in his country, so I never knew any of them in a normal way. Only met my grandparents briefly when I was young, my one aunt on father's side died before I knew her and no desire to know her husband or child.

Stayed with aunt on mother's side a while, and wished I hadn't. My cousin's wife had a nicer family, but I only met them a couple of days.

 

I try not to think of them, but I do regret that I was born into a life without roots. I envy those that have strong family ties. Having none myself, I think that those that fall out with siblings are making a sad mistake.

[EVENKEEL]

My favorite place for reflection on my life is a quiet stretch of beach with some beers and a joint. My father who passed 37 yrs ago at age 81 was what any father should strive to be. So I sit on the beach watching the endless lapping of waves and think of my parents and siblings who have passed. I have 2 children and grand kids so I'm far from being alone in this world.

 

But, yes I like to think of years gone by and what I want to accomplish before my life ends.

[remobb]

Yes, I do often. My mother and father died, then my older brother and now my oldest sister. All of which my son has never met. Reason being, I lost contact for many years due to travelling around and moving to Thailand. Now, I cannot afford to go back to the UK to see my remaining family. my regrets are that my son will probably never meet his English family, at least while I am still alive. Now I am 71 years old. I have re-established contact but it's not the same as seeing them in person. I still live in hope that one day I will take my son to meet them, a dream.

[simon43]

15 hours ago, steven100 said:

yes .... very sad indeed.  I have a close Thai friend who contracted TB about 10 years ago,  I went around to see him one afternoon at his sisters and the family were there just thinking he ate something bad or caught some bug somewhere .... I tell you he was really sick, and I could see that ... I told them to get him to a hospital straight away, I said he's not good, so they heeded my words and took him straight to hospital. Anyway, turns out he got TB and spent a week in hospital. To this day I'm so glad I went to see him because he wouldn't have seen the night out. 

In the case of my niece, I was stuck in Laos because of Covid restrictions.  When I finally managed to get back to Thailand, my niece asked me to visit her and mentioned that she was a bit thin. When I saw her, I knew that I was looking at someone who was going to die soon.  Her weight was about 24 Kg, but despite getting her into hospital and on medication, she was too far gone to recover.  I don't blame myself at all for not being there earlier when she could have been saved, that's how the cookie crumbles.  I can't understand why her family did nothing as she wasted away before their eyes, but they told me that it was karma.  Her time was coming and therefore they should not try to avoid this event.  Buddhism is a strange belief....

 

TB is much more prevalent in south-east Asia than some people imagine.  My ex had it (and recovered), her brother had it (and recovered).

[473geo]

Of course my family are in my thoughts, they provide the memories I utilise when bringing up my children and grandchildren, they provided the foundation for my life 

 

 

[RocketDog]

On 9/12/2022 at 6:03 PM, steven100 said:

haha ... where's that laughing emoji ...

Some buttons are now apparently considered abusive/trolling/stalking according to AN mods. Only positive responses are allowed.

 

That's what I was told by one in response to an inquiry.

[steven100]

2 minutes ago, RocketDog said:

Only positive responses are allowed

That's the same as hotel reviews ....  only say good ... you can't speak the truth if you consider a place, service or comment not to be correct or of poor quality or not worthy. 

 

strange .....  

[RocketDog]

Just now, steven100 said:

That's the same as hotel reviews ....  only say good ... you can't speak the truth if you consider a place, service or comment not to be correct or of poor quality or not worthy. 

 

strange .....  

Not strange any more. It's a trend.

To me it's like a survey with only one possible answer to each question.

 

If buttons are deemed potentially so offensive they should all be removed.

[PingRoundTheWorld]

The broader family (uncles/cousins/etc) I could care less about - never had any sort of real relationship with any of them beyond family gatherings. My close family (parents - still alive and hope it stays that way a long time, brother and sister and their families) I do care about and in recent years made an effort to see more often especially as my parents aren't young anymore. My grandparents I loved but they passed a long time ago.

 

But at the end of the day who you surround yourself with on a daily basis is who will have the most impact on your life - gf/wife, close friends, even drinking buddies, lol.

[BTB1977]

Past relatives is the least of your problems. The fact that your drinking Federbrau concerns us most. LOL

[KhunLA]

15 minutes ago, RocketDog said:

If buttons are deemed potentially so offensive they should all be removed.

Agree, as I find posts I consider offensive to my senses, even more so, when receiving likes/love/thanks ????

 

Embarrassing that so many people can be that .... 

 

See, I can self-censor ... ????

 

On Topic, as always.

17 friends on FB, is about my only conx with past life in USA.  Half of those are wife's family & 1 friend I met through her here.

 

Only 2 of 3 brothers on FB, and 1 I'll talk with (msgr) maybe once a month, if that.

 

The rest of our interaction is emojis ????

On those very few posts on FB.  I'm probably the most active, due to being a photo bug, aside from 3 'wives' of 2 brothers & 1 friend, posting inspiration msgs, which I ignore, since I don't even follow them.  Once a month I'll peek at there profile, make sure nobody died ????

 

My niece was dead for over a year, before I realized it, and this is one I flew to Sweden to visit.  She meant that much to me, and somehow, they all forgot to tell me, or all thought the other did.  Yet nobody noticed I didn't contact my brother & wife to extend my condolences.

 

Close family, I think not.

Edited September 14, 2022 by KhunLA

[EVENKEEL]

4 minutes ago, BTB1977 said:

Past relatives is the least of your problems. The fact that your drinking Federbrau concerns us most. LOL

????

[steven100]

11 minutes ago, RocketDog said:

Not strange any more. It's a trend.

To me it's like a survey with only one possible answer to each question.

 

If buttons are deemed potentially so offensive they should all be removed.

and that's also the same as why nothing will ever improve in Thailand,  product quality and service quality will also remain below par because no one complains and if you do complain your looked at as a trouble maker.  It's the same with comments,  you can't disagree ... same with hotel reviews. What's the point in having any opinion.  

[RocketDog]

1 hour ago, steven100 said:

and that's also the same as why nothing will ever improve in Thailand,  product quality and service quality will also remain below par because no one complains and if you do complain your looked at as a trouble maker.  It's the same with comments,  you can't disagree ... same with hotel reviews. What's the point in having any opinion.  

Agreed. Just as I would reject a survey with only single responses possible, I will now stop using any of the response buttons; that's one choice I've always had and still retain: 'none of the above'.

 

Such things have always been ambiguous at best, but are now meaningless contrivances, in my personal opinion.

 

Clearly, nobody is forcing us to use any forums at all, so that's certainly an alternative. As consumers we always have the right to selectively stop consuming. 

[IvorBiggun2]

On 9/12/2022 at 5:42 PM, steven100 said:

Do you ever think about your dead relatives ?

No

[jerrymahoney]

To the query "Do you ever think about the family that left you behind"

 

As for me, sometimes.

 

As for the family thinking about me, likely far less than sometimes.

[paulbrow]

Certainly, I think about them, but I don't dwell on them.  I too am down pretty much to just me. Entire immediate family is gone and reasonably sure all the aunts and uncles are gone also. The good news is that I'm still kicking! Life's too short to dwell on our losses. 

[Muzzique]

On 9/12/2022 at 12:42 PM, steven100 said:

its just me ... I think about this every day constantly.  They're all gone.  

People die and new people are born. Have no regrets. It is the cycle of life. 

You are never alone because families are not simply about blood ties. You create new ones as you go through life.

 

I live my life for those who never got as far as I did. I enjoy the things I do and see for them. 

 

Everyone one who touches you remains a part of you, and everyone you touch extends that to others.

 

Get out and live. Stop stagnating thinking about death. You only have one life so get out and live it. When that time comes for you to join them you should have absolutely no regrets.

 

 

[BritManToo]

On 9/12/2022 at 5:42 PM, steven100 said:

Do you ever think about your dead relatives ?

just curious if you think about that also ..... 

All the time, and all my dead friends.

My parents were dead by the time I was 22, most of my other relatives dead by the time I was 45.

 

Almost everyone I ever knew is dead, at 66 I'm surprised to be last man standing.

Lucky i started a new family at 52, else it would all be pointless.

[jerrymahoney]

52 minutes ago, Muzzique said:

Stop stagnating thinking about death.

Why? NY Times obituaries great reading.

 

https://www.nytimes.com/international/section/obituaries

[BritManToo]

6 hours ago, remobb said:

I lost contact for many years due to travelling around and moving to Thailand. Now, I cannot afford to go back to the UK to see my remaining family.

Agree, but odd thing is you would think they would like a holiday in Thailand with free accommodation and a local guide. I would have jumped at the chance of a foreign trip to meet rellys where my only expense was tickets and entertainment. When I was in my 30s I did take an aging Auntie to Canada so she could see all her relatives one last time, and it was great.

 

Guess our friends and relatives didn't like us that much.

Edited September 14, 2022 by BritManToo

[shackleton]

I only think about my Mother and Father on the Anniversary of their deaths RIP

send flowers via my sister