How did you walk out and leave?

[georgegeorgia]

How did you do it?

How did you make that first step to walk out in your ex wife / family and make it to to Thailand?

 

I know there's some heartbreaking stories , but I want to know especially you guys in your 40's 50's with children

 

Did you just walk out and say I want a separation I think I will have a better life in Thailand or Asia ?

 

Did you say to your farang wife who you may still love " it's time to go love , I need to start my life !!!

 

Your kids did they understand your separation ....did they understand your new life ...

 

Regrets on leaving ...how much heartbreak did you leave back in farangland 

[bignok]

Maybe the wife left them

Maybe they were virgins

[Ralf001]

Booked flight.

Packed bag.

Called taxi.

[Kwasaki]

My last UK marriage ended amiably and 50/50 agreement was made.

 

Didn't want to rent or buy to stay in England so went looking Europe and Asia and decided on Thailand to retire early to.

 

My family come and see me in Thailand I have no desire to see tax prison England again.

[Hummin]

19 minutes ago, georgegeorgia said:

How did you do it?

How did you make that first step to walk out in your ex wife / family and make it to to Thailand?

 

I know there's some heartbreaking stories , but I want to know especially you guys in your 40's 50's with children

 

Did you just walk out and say I want a separation I think I will have a better life in Thailand or Asia ?

 

Did you say to your farang wife who you may still love " it's time to go love , I need to start my life !!!

 

Your kids did they understand your separation ....did they understand your new life ...

 

Regrets on leaving ...how much heartbreak did you leave back in farangland 

How do you think your kids will react? You know them best, and Im sure you will regret when you will finely become grand dad. 

 

Your financial future aspect will count in as much as your ability to stay in contact and be close to them and their life. 

[NextG]

Don’t feed the…

[simon43]

I was happily working in the UK as CTO of a mobile technology company that had just purchased my one-man-band AI/mobile internet company. Their new office was in an unheated and damp basement that had been empty for years.

 

A few months after starting work in that office I developed a cough that got worse and worse until I was unable to hold a conversation without having explosive coughing fits.  This was suspected Aspergillosis (fungal spores in my lungs) that were present in the damp office air.

 

This is a chronic disease which can't be cured but can be managed with the right medication and living environment.  My doctor suggested that living in a hot and humid climate may well help to minimise my symptoms.  So I took a trip to Thailand and my coughing stopped!  I returned to the UK climate and my coughing came back with a vengeance.  I did several trips to/from Thailand and each time that I stayed in Thailand my symptoms were minimal and they always returned when I came back to the UK.

 

So I had to make the life-changing decision to move to Thailand (or a similar hot/humid climate).  At that time I had funds to start up a new business in Thailand, but my wife was having none of it.  Understandably, she was unwilling to move to Thailand with our 3 young kids who were well-settled in the village school.

 

So we agreed to separate and I moved to Thailand, but vowed to keep in touch with my kids.  Unfortunately, that takes 2 to tango and my wife (soon to be ex) cut me off from my kids and (according to my brother) told them that I had left her for a Thai women...)

 

I still send e-cards on their birthdays and at Xmas, but they never reply, even going so far as to block my email address on the e-card website ????.  My UK kids are now in their early twenties and I guess they will never know the truth about why their dad left them to live in Thailand.

 

It's more than 20 years since I left the UK. I have moved around a bit in south-east Asia and some locations had 'cool' climates which caused me problems. But in general, as long as I walk or jog 4-5 Km per day AND eat healthy food AND gargle with salt water AND take ani-histamine and anti-congestants - my lungs are great!!

[KhunLA]

Life stories, aren't we bored.  I'll play:

 

Wife #1 ... first & last time she lied to me.  A friend & myself emptied our apartment, and that was the end of that relationship.  Young and no assets.

 

Wife #2 ... mutual, almost.  Till death do you part, seemed a bit long for me.  I suggested divorce after 1 yr, and she didn't argue the point.   Done, still kind of young, and no real equity in assets.

 

Wife #3 (1st Thai wife) ... drank a bit too much, gambled too much, and yea, probably that also.  MIA for the weekend, so door locked when she returned, I simply informed her, she doesn't live here any more.  Done with that one, I kept & sold all assets.

 

Had Usufruct & POA, about a year or so later, sold the land/house, without her involvement.

 

Wife #4 ... 17+ yrs & going strong.  She can bury me in the back yard, and keep it all, actually bought for her anyway.  Anyone that can put up with me this long, deserves everything.

 

Without her, we couldn't have invested and built our / her nice little nest egg, as I'm trying to spend all not reserved for her & kid.  It comes in yearly, and we try to spend it ... failing miserably, I might add.

Edited August 6, 2023 by KhunLA

[georgegeorgia]

Certainly some sad stories 

I recall two stories a few weeks ago ,talking to a 62yo  bar owner sitting at my table ( no didn't buy him a drink )

 

He had tears in his eyes as he told me he uprooted from farangland after been married 30 years , left his native Belgium leaving his adult sons behind who have refused to speak to him ever since !!

"You left mum " they reply to him 

 

" It was her fault" he said , 

She was nagging nagging every night after my work !!

 

He was tearing up ,6 years later he is living in a room on top of his bar, whether he is happy who knows 

 

He lets his ex  wife keep the house she pays him half rent but never spoke to her since ,strange case and sad 

 

The second case was a cafe owner who only sees his grandkids via WhatsApp but the ex wife won't talk to him 

 

He had a nervous breakdown in 2015 in the UK ,lost his job etc 

"She caused me to have a breakdown he says 

 

Decided on a trip to Pattaya to get away  ,and decided 2 weeks later to leave ,his ex wife bought his half of the house and he has never been back 

 

Strangely it's always the wife's fault ! 

 

Edited August 6, 2023 by georgegeorgia

[georgegeorgia]

57 minutes ago, Ralf001 said:

Booked flight.

Packed bag.

Called taxi.

Did you leave your  kids,wife  behind,walked out ?

Any regrets ? 

Any trauma from this?

 

Edited August 6, 2023 by georgegeorgia

[Captain Monday]

After the " last straw".  While she was at work I put my all my personal stuff in my car got a storage unit. Parked at the airport and flew to my base on the other side of the country where I already had been paying for a hot rack at a hotel room crashpad.  Although it was hard at first we remained friendly. Until she got remarried. Eventually her Asian husband could not tolerate her texting her ex. The whole problem?  Why cant we have kids even though we agreed beforehand that we would not,

 

An intractable issue. When young women want them they will get somehow. 

 

 

 

[georgegeorgia]

I wonder ....how many of you would go back to farangland now after a few years away if your ex said come back your welcome!!

[Hummin]

5 minutes ago, georgegeorgia said:

I wonder ....how many of you would go back to farangland now after a few years away if your ex said come back your welcome!!

Good luck with that! That bridge would be gone at once you leave for Thailand. 

 

How old is your kids? 

[KhunLA]

5 minutes ago, georgegeorgia said:

I wonder ....how many of you would go back to farangland now after a few years away if your ex said come back your welcome!!

Nah ... though #2 and myself are on FB, rarely talk, but since I only have 15 friends on FB ... nuff said, and we still can make each other laugh when we do chit chat.

[BritManToo]

1 hour ago, georgegeorgia said:

Did you just walk out and say I want a separation I think I will have a better life in Thailand or Asia ?

Your kids did they understand your separation ....did they understand your new life ...

MIne started divorce proceedings and had me removed from my home.

Wouldn't let me see the kids again.

 

I just moved to Thailand without telling her, and never had contact with her or the 4 kids again.

I don't really do confrontation, just slip out the back Jack.

[Reginald Prewster]

I started working offshore and my German Ex enjoyed the cash flow (was in 1998) 

2 Yellow cards for not beeing able to put money aside for a farm we both wanted, 

divorcement 2001 but stayed together because of the Kids..

 

2002 Red Card and as above stated: Taxi, Flight, Thailand.

 

2002 met my new wife (Thai) she took care of my daughters which the mother didn't support. 

 

well, happy married since then..... 

[sidjameson]

1 hour ago, simon43 said:

I was happily working in the UK as CTO of a mobile technology company that had just purchased my one-man-band AI/mobile internet company. Their new office was in an unheated and damp basement that had been empty for years.

 

A few months after starting work in that office I developed a cough that got worse and worse until I was unable to hold a conversation without having explosive coughing fits.  This was suspected Aspergillosis (fungal spores in my lungs) that were present in the damp office air.

 

This is a chronic disease which can't be cured but can be managed with the right medication and living environment.  My doctor suggested that living in a hot and humid climate may well help to minimise my symptoms.  So I took a trip to Thailand and my coughing stopped!  I returned to the UK climate and my coughing came back with a vengeance.  I did several trips to/from Thailand and each time that I stayed in Thailand my symptoms were minimal and they always returned when I came back to the UK.

 

So I had to make the life-changing decision to move to Thailand (or a similar hot/humid climate).  At that time I had funds to start up a new business in Thailand, but my wife was having none of it.  Understandably, she was unwilling to move to Thailand with our 3 young kids who were well-settled in the village school.

 

So we agreed to separate and I moved to Thailand, but vowed to keep in touch with my kids.  Unfortunately, that takes 2 to tango and my wife (soon to be ex) cut me off from my kids and (according to my brother) told them that I had left her for a Thai women...)

 

I still send e-cards on their birthdays and at Xmas, but they never reply, even going so far as to block my email address on the e-card website ????.  My UK kids are now in their early twenties and I guess they will never know the truth about why their dad left them to live in Thailand.

 

It's more than 20 years since I left the UK. I have moved around a bit in south-east Asia and some locations had 'cool' climates which caused me problems. But in general, as long as I walk or jog 4-5 Km per day AND eat healthy food AND gargle with salt water AND take ani-histamine and anti-congestants - my lungs are great!!

Very nicely written.

I've followed your posts thru the years, just wondering where you settled on for now? 

[Felton Jarvis]

No wives, no children, no hope. My last eleven years in the work force were with a radio station owned by a university. I got state pension and an annuity on top of my Social Security at age 65. I was forced to retire by a pack of jackals that ran the most toxic work environment that I had experienced in 40 years of work. Once I agreed to retire a year early, I bought my ticket to Thailand and was gone a month after my 65th birthday. Came here determined to avoid bargirls but the gainfully employed women I was involved with, were little better than the prostitutes. When the pandemic hit, I took in a woman who had lost her job in Sriracha and three years later, we are still together. She doesn’t ask for much and seems happy to have a nice apartment to sleep in. I am 73, she is 46. It seems to work, for now.

[EVENKEEL]

This thread is a real downer man. The OP has some serious issues to deal with. Hope you feel better.

[HandsomeTallFarang]

2 hours ago, simon43 said:

I was happily working in the UK as CTO of a mobile technology company that had just purchased my one-man-band AI/mobile internet company. Their new office was in an unheated and damp basement that had been empty for years.

 

A few months after starting work in that office I developed a cough that got worse and worse until I was unable to hold a conversation without having explosive coughing fits.  This was suspected Aspergillosis (fungal spores in my lungs) that were present in the damp office air.

 

This is a chronic disease which can't be cured but can be managed with the right medication and living environment.  My doctor suggested that living in a hot and humid climate may well help to minimise my symptoms.  So I took a trip to Thailand and my coughing stopped!  I returned to the UK climate and my coughing came back with a vengeance.  I did several trips to/from Thailand and each time that I stayed in Thailand my symptoms were minimal and they always returned when I came back to the UK.

 

So I had to make the life-changing decision to move to Thailand (or a similar hot/humid climate).  At that time I had funds to start up a new business in Thailand, but my wife was having none of it.  Understandably, she was unwilling to move to Thailand with our 3 young kids who were well-settled in the village school.

 

So we agreed to separate and I moved to Thailand, but vowed to keep in touch with my kids.  Unfortunately, that takes 2 to tango and my wife (soon to be ex) cut me off from my kids and (according to my brother) told them that I had left her for a Thai women...)

 

I still send e-cards on their birthdays and at Xmas, but they never reply, even going so far as to block my email address on the e-card website ????.  My UK kids are now in their early twenties and I guess they will never know the truth about why their dad left them to live in Thailand.

 

It's more than 20 years since I left the UK. I have moved around a bit in south-east Asia and some locations had 'cool' climates which caused me problems. But in general, as long as I walk or jog 4-5 Km per day AND eat healthy food AND gargle with salt water AND take ani-histamine and anti-congestants - my lungs are great!!

This is so depressing. Abandoned a family so that you could chase dick-tingles thousands of miles away.

Wow.

[Furioso]

In the 80's and 90's I moved to a different military base almost every year. I saw how impossible military marriages were, mostly divorces and they saw their kids once a year. No way I could deal with that. In the mid 90's I was 30 years old stationed in Guam for a year, the guy sitting next to me was literally married to a prostitute. I made claims that I wasn't ever getting married but I guess he didn't believe me. One day he vaulted out of his chair, pointed at me, and loudly exclaimed "You really mean it when you say you're never getting married!" I was like "yeah, I thought you knew that".

 

Of course I never met the right girl, but if I did it still would have ended in disaster. 

[Ralf001]

1 hour ago, georgegeorgia said:

Did you leave your  kids,wife  behind,walked out ?

Any regrets ? 

Any trauma from this?

 

I suffered no Trauma.

[roo860]

1 hour ago, georgegeorgia said:

I wonder ....how many of you would go back to farangland now after a few years away if your ex said come back your welcome!!

mines dead, fortunately

[novacova]

My wife in the US was probably the best thing that ever happened to me, we were best of friends and we never struggled about anything. She was a high achiever and highly intelligent, probably the smartest person I’ve met besides her father and brother. Really miss our conversations, miss having someone who knows me through and through. She died 14 years ago, then I came here north TH a year later to get away from it all, just wanted to find a place calm where the people are friendly. After 6 years dating 2 Thai women, 2 Chinese women, Korean, and a Burmese finally met someone who could challenge me on all fronts. Anyway, I consider what time I have left is as a bonus.

[bignok]

3 hours ago, EVENKEEL said:

This thread is a real downer man. The OP has some serious issues to deal with. Hope you feel better.

555

[bignok]

3 hours ago, HandsomeTallFarang said:

This is so depressing. Abandoned a family so that you could chase dick-tingles thousands of miles away.

Wow.

He moved for health reasons. Learn to read.

[simon43]

1 hour ago, bignok said:

He moved for health reasons. Learn to read.

Yep, he definitely has a reading problem!  BTW, when I returned to the UK in early February for prostate cancer investigations, I almost abandoned my stay in the UK because my lung problems returned rapidly in that cold climate. It took me about 2 months back in a hot/humid climate to recover.

[LaosLover]

Love your posts G-man. Respect and wishing you better days.

 

I'm an American who divorced and English woman (no sex and I caught her snorting heroin twice). The landlord of a really chav pub I liked offered me a free room, in case I need a sudden escape.

 

After the big heave-ho talk, it turned out to be a garden shed. With a cot, and an AC/DC poster. 

 

It was like a stop on the Underground Railroad to freedom. Others had preceded me, one had left an AC/DC poster.

 

I could have afforded a real room, but I stayed there for a week, seriously on the piss, like the losers before me. And then I moved to Ubon. And you can and will too. 

 

As soon as you can possibly leave, do so. Even if it means sleeping semi-rough.

[simon43]

5 hours ago, sidjameson said:

Very nicely written.

I've followed your posts thru the years, just wondering where you settled on for now? 

Hi Sid, after I returned back from hospital tests in the UK (see post above), I planned to return to Burma to continue my in-class teaching.  However for the second time the military junta refused to issue me with a visa.  So with that situation and bearing in mind my cancer 'scare', I decided to retire from in-class teaching and only teach online (which I have mostly been doing for the past few years anyway).

 

After recovering from the UK climate on Phangan Island for a couple of months I moved back to Luang Prabang in north Laos where I was once the Principal of the international school.  When I start to draw my UK pension (in only 22 months from now yippee), I will probably move down to live in Vang Vieng because with the new railway and motorway it's only an hour or 2 from Vientiane and the only decent private hospital in the country (although exercise/good diet keeps me healthy, I am mindful of my age and assume that other medical ailments may arise).

 

My small but adequate pension will also enable me to spend more time doing voluntary teaching in the community ????

[freedomnow]

3 minutes ago, simon43 said:

Hi Sid, after I returned back from hospital tests in the UK (see post above), I planned to return to Burma to continue my in-class teaching.  However for the second time the military junta refused to issue me with a visa.  So with that situation and bearing in mind my cancer 'scare', I decided to retire from in-class teaching and only teach online (which I have mostly been doing for the past few years anyway).

 

After recovering from the UK climate on Phangan Island for a couple of months I moved back to Luang Prabang in north Laos where I was once the Principal of the international school.  When I start to draw my UK pension (in only 22 months from now yippee), I will probably move down to live in Vang Vieng because with the new railway and motorway it's only an hour or 2 from Vientiane and the only decent private hospital in the country (although exercise/good diet keeps me healthy, I am mindful of my age and assume that other medical ailments may arise).

 

My small but adequate pension will also enable me to spend more time doing voluntary teaching in the community ????

From LP to VV ?

VV is the backpacker ghetto epicentre of SEA....can't get out it fast enough to lovely splendid LP if I ever stopped for a break prior to rail line....