Spending Money - Should I follow my Friends Advice ?

[AlienBoy]

 

I know this may sound childish and nonsensical, but its a subject that is causing me great concern .

 

Me, Well I’m 76 years old and in good health and I have permanently lived in Thailand along with my wonderful Thai wife for the past 19 years . We have one daughter. 

 

Financially I have approximately 3 Million Baht in a Thai savings bank account .
I receive a State pension of around 35,000 Baht a month .
My monthly expenditure is around 25,000 Baht a month. - including my Private health Insurance 
My wife does not work .
My state pension will be terminated on my death
I have no personal life insurance .

 

In my mind I have always thought that after I have died the money in my Thai savings bank account would be there for my wife and daughter.

 

I have discussed the subject of my bank account with my wife and the idea that I would like to keep my bank balance as high as possible so that in the event of me passing away , there would still be money in my bank account for her and our daughter.

 

With that idea in mind my self and my wife set out to live as frugally as possible , in the hope that doing so would not force us to withdraw any living expenses money from my bank account . 

 

So in other words really at my suggestion , both our personal spending habits have been cut down to the bare minimum in the hope that we do not have to withdraw any money from my bank account that upon my death will provide my widowed wife with money .

 

Generally speaking due to our plan to live as frugally as possible , both of us don’t purchase any thing like new clothes ( my wife only buys second hand ) or decent mobile phones, computers or take holidays , or eat out in restaurants or buy expensive foreign foods for my self ,or other little luxuries .

 

Us living as frugally as possible has only one aim and that is to try and make sure that upon my death , my un touched bank balance will be there for my wife and daughter.

 

I was recently talking to a good friend and described to him about my self and my wife not spending any unnecessary money and the reason we were living a very frugal lifestyle . 

 

My good friend on hearing what I was doing ( in the hope of sustaining my bank balance ) said that I was crazy especially at my age , and that I should be enjoying my time of life and stop worrying about what the future may hold for my wife and daughter after I have passed away . 

 

On hearing my good friend’s comment I’m now torn between staying on our current path and not spending any unnecessary money , or throw caution to the wind and stop worrying about what the future may hold for my darling wife and daughter after I have passed away and just talk to my wife about our spending habits and hopefully spend more money that's in my bank account , so we both could enjoy our life together but on a better level.

 

Although my wife has been very understanding about our spending  I’m sure she would like for the first time to buy some nice things for her self ,and that goes for me as well. 

 

I must admit that I do from time to time dream about spending some money that's in my bank account on my self  but then the little voice in side my head keeps whispering in my ear , don’t be selfish . 

 

Currently if both my wife and my self stick to our frugal way of life , we can just about manage our finances and not have to withdraw any money from my bank account. But our frugal life style is not what I would call a ‘’ Happy ‘’ situation. 

 

So there you have it , stay with the frugal lifestyle and when the time comes to draw my last breath and finally say good bye,  at least its knowing that my beloved wife and daughter will have some money from my bank account . 

 

I have a nagging doubt that my above logic may not be the best option. 

 

Your thoughts would be most welcome .

 

Thank You.

[Olmate]

It wont last 6 months either way! 

[nikmar]

No harm with the occassional treat. A decent meal once a month with a little wine. An occassional trip. You can still travel cheaply and a half decent accomodation isnt going to break the bank.

 

You can treat yourself without blowing everything you have.

[Stocky]

11 minutes ago, AlienBoy said:

living a very frugal lifestyle

Sounds more like an existence than a lifestyle. I'd cut yourself and the wife a little slack and treat yourselves now and again. 

[Denim]

Moderation in all things. Won't hurt to treat yourself or your wife from time to time. Does not mean you have to suddenly start spending money like crazy. Life is for living and the clock is ticking for all of us.

[Liverpool Lou]

"Spending Money - Should I follow my Friends Advice?"

 

Is your friend going to top up your bank account when his spending-your-money advice causes the balance to drop to unexpected levels? 

[2baht]

Your friends advice, AN advice, have you got any ideas of your own? 🤔

[FritsSikkink]

Setup a small business for your wife so she can earn her own money and learn how to take care of herself.

[circa02]

3 minutes ago, Olmate said:

It wont last 6 months either way! 

Depends how imaginative the family and friends are in presenting unmissable opportunities and unavoidable desperate situations where only money can help.. but yep the point is dead on

You would be much safer leaving 100k for funeral and wrapping up expenses finding someone trusted back home to transfer 25k a month with absolutely no exceptions...

[Fat is a type of crazy]

You have good intentions, and good to put a bit aside, but it might be making you serious and cheap and less fun to be around so I would go back to your normal spend for you and your wife, with a bit extra here and there, so you can all have good memories of having a bit of fun in your later years while they will appreciate the bit left behind too. 

[brianthainess]

28 minutes ago, AlienBoy said:

I receive a State pension of around 35,000 Baht a month .
My monthly expenditure is around 25,000 Baht a month.

So just add/allow another 2-3k month to your monthly expenses an extra 3k a month could give a bit more enjoyment to both of you, new dress for your wife and a few luxuries. 

[novacova]

It’s a state of mind depending on how creative you are. You can be just as happy living a simple lifestyle as an extravagant lifestyle. Though a healthy diet is always paramount. Keep your extended goals at the top of the list. Listen to your own intuition.

[Olmate]

2 minutes ago, brianthainess said:

So just add/allow another 2-3k month to your monthly expenses an extra 3k a month could give a bit more enjoyment to both of you, new dress for your wife and a few luxuries. 

80 /100 baht day, steady on! 

[bignok]

6 minutes ago, brianthainess said:

So just add/allow another 2-3k month to your monthly expenses an extra 3k a month could give a bit more enjoyment to both of you, new dress for your wife and a few luxuries. 

3k a month is stuff all. How about 8k a month. 

[Furioso]

I stopped reading after "I know..

[Sheryl]

"I’m now torn between staying on our current path and not spending any unnecessary money , or throw caution to the wind and stop worrying about what the future may hold for my darling wife and daughter after I have passed away "

 

There is a middle path here.

 

Budget for yourself & your wife a certain amount of money for "extras"  every couple of months and continue to keep the rest in savings. You hardly need to to completely waste your savings just to have an occasional luxury.

 

There is another problem not mentioned in your OP: How confident are you that your wife and daughter will be able to wisely manage the 3 million (or whatever it is at your death)? After all it will need to last them at least your wife's remaining lifetime.  Thais are not usually the best at m naging lump sums like this and even if they themselves are,  it is highly likely that other relations, and relations of relations,  will come calling with demands and pressure tactics...and keep it up. That 3 million could vanish rather quickly in such a scenario and you will not be there to help your wife field  such demands.

 

I would suggest you investigate annuity type arrangements with a reliable  financial institution.  Tokio Marine might be an option.

 

You should also  discuss clearly with your wife how much is to be spent on your funeral (look into whether there is a village fund that will assist).

 

Are you sure there is no survivor entitlement or any sort to your State pension?

 

 

[Celsius]

3 million is really not a lot.

 

How much do you really trust your private health insurance to cover you?

 

 

[JAFO]

31 minutes ago, Stocky said:

Sounds more like an existence than a lifestyle. I'd cut yourself and the wife a little slack and treat yourselves now and again. 

I agree with the caveat I would treat myself to heck of a lot more quite honestly. Can we assume that the OP's land and house are paid so asset debt is minimal or nothing other than basic stuff?  

 

If I was 76, I'd be enjoying it all.  Buy what you want. Far too many save for that proverbial rainy day or want to save it for others but you worked for it. I have known some older folks that become so frugal and pass the inheritance off and they receive it and spend it like they stole it.  Why go with out? 

 

 

Edited October 19, 2023 by JAFO

[bignok]

42 minutes ago, AlienBoy said:

receive a State pension of around 35,000 Baht a month .
My monthly expenditure is around 25,000 Baht a month. - including my Private health Insurance 

Obvious solution spend 33,000 to 35,000 a month. Enjoy yourself a bit more. Maybe a holiday to Koh Chang or whatever.

 

 

[Sheryl]

Flaming posts (you know who you are) have been removed.

 

 

[bignok]

2 minutes ago, JAFO said:

I agree with the caveat I would treat myself to heck of a lot more quite honestly. Can we assume that the OP's land and house are paid so asset debt is minimal or nothing other than basic stuff?  

 

If I was 76, I'd be enjoying it all.  Buy what you want. Far too many save for that proverbial rainy day or want to save it for others but you worked for it. I have known some older folks that become so frugal and pass the inheritance off and then spend it like they stole it.  Why go with out? 

 

 

My friend is 76, says he has 10 years left, 5 good years. Realistic about it.

 

A monthly trip or weekly restaurant thing. 

 

 

[JAFO]

Just now, bignok said:

My friend is 76, says he has 10 years left, 5 good years. Realistic about it.

 

A monthly trip or weekly restaurant thing. 

At minimum.  Of course with the OP at 76 one would need to know is his state of mind and desires.  at 76 year old a lot of unknowns in both activity level, health etc.   Some will want to go and have some fun others are sitting in that big easy chair waiting for their ticket to get punched.  

[bignok]

600 baht gets a nice meal. Do that once a week. 3 night holiday 5000 baht once a month.

[JAS21]

Look at getting the best and secure savings rates available. Also you might find that your wife can get better interest rates than you can.

 

Interest rates are getting better, so have a good look around

 

Also, how old is your daughter … she could help her Mother in years to come

Edited October 19, 2023 by JAS21

[bignok]

1 minute ago, JAFO said:

At minimum.  Of course with the OP at 76 one would need to know is his state of mind and desires.  at 76 year old a lot of unknowns in both activity level, health etc.   Some will want to go and have some fun others are sitting in that big easy chair waiting for their ticket to get punched.  

Even if you live to 90 the best years are pre 85. Body starts breaking down.

[scubascuba3]

Spending an extra 10k a month won't change things too much but of course you need as much as possible available if/when you get health conditions

[JAFO]

Just now, bignok said:

Even if you live to 90 the best years are pre 85. Body starts breaking down.

indeed.  I am a long way off from those ages but another thing after re reading the original OP was he didn't really clarify ( not that's its any of our business) how old his wife and daughter are.  That would have a huge influence on what some might say on what to do. If his wife is much younger and his daughter is still in grade school then looking out for their future would probably be the proper thing to do.  However lets say she is close to his age, his daughter has graduated and is working then she is likely the beneficiary for the property and asset anyway so the OP should go burn some cash and enjoy once a month or so 2 week along beach resort trip to have some fun.  In the big picture, far too many variables and not enough info. 

[bignok]

3 minutes ago, JAFO said:

indeed.  I am a long way off from those ages but another thing after re reading the original OP was he didn't really clarify ( not that's its any of our business) how old his wife and daughter are.  That would have a huge influence on what some might say on what to do. If his wife is much younger and his daughter is still in grade school then looking out for their future would probably be the proper thing to do.  However lets say she is close to his age, his daughter has graduated and is working then she is likely the beneficiary for the property and asset anyway so the OP should go burn some cash and enjoy once a month or so 2 week along beach resort trip to have some fun.  In the big picture, far too many variables and not enough info. 

They might waste it in 12 months after he has gone. Might as well enjoy life a bit.

[NoDisplayName]

1 hour ago, AlienBoy said:

On hearing my good friend’s comment I’m now torn between staying on our current path and not spending any unnecessary money , or throw caution to the wind and stop worrying about what the future

False dichotomy.  You don't have to choose between miserly and spendthrift.

Meet in the middle.

 

You're 76 with 3 million in the bank.

 

Assume you'll make it to 90.  Set aside 1 million in a special account to remain untouched until that day.

 

Take the 2 million and spend down over 14 years.  That would give you around 12,000 baht/month to spend on "extravagances" for you and your wife (not factoring in dividends and interest on the balance).

[ChaiyaTH]

This is obviously not smart at all, even if you had the money in gold for the past 5 years, you would now have had 4.5 million baht already. If you would just get 6% yearly returns that already increases your monthly budget by 15,000 baht without taking out the 3 million. This is your best solution.

Edited October 19, 2023 by ChaiyaTH