Help! GF refuses to leave!

[arthurwait]

If she refuses, join the monastry. But you ll have to shave your head first and then wear no pants.

Maybe he's old and Scottish.

[CarlBkk]

It's sad to say but there are loads of girls like this in Thailand...and the true extent of their baggage takes some time to expose itself, as you found out. Be ready for when it does by being strong and true to your word.

You need to give her an ultimatum now - which could either be the next time she shouts down the phone at you/hits you/damages something it's definitely over. You need to seriously plan now what the next step is: getting her out and keeping her away will be very difficult. I know plenty of good honest guys who've just had to do a runner and move to another part of the city, otherwise the trouble will not go away. Paying someone off implies you're at fault - Thais will rarely admit they are at fault, but may...just may....look back and realise it when they're on their own, after an ultimatum, not knowing where they're nice kind gentle boyfriend has gone.

Your problem lies in that you will need to leave your job too, as I very much doubt she would! I can just imagine the scenes she'd cause at work if you run.

Lastly, you need to record the abuse she gives you, just in case you ever need it legally or to prove anything. I've heard of family members/friends believing one side so strongly that they also conspire to "get" the bad boyfriend, of relatives in the law being called in to "scare" and others.

[JLCrab]

I'm waiting for the counterpoint stories where the Thai girl was the level-headed salt-of-the-earth and the farang non-Thai guy turned out to be the total wacko in creating the dysfunctional relationship. Maybe a long wait.

Edited August 28, 2013 by JLCrab

[rene123]

I'm waiting for the counterpoint stories where the Thai girl was the level-headed salt-of-the-earth and the farang non-Thai guy turned out to be the total wacko in creating the dysfunctional relationship. Maybe a long wait.

I'm sure there are lots of those stories in Thailand, but this is an English speaking forum.

[JLCrab]

I'm waiting for the counterpoint stories where the Thai girl was the level-headed salt-of-the-earth and the farang non-Thai guy turned out to be the total wacko in creating the dysfunctional relationship. Maybe a long wait.

I'm sure there are lots of those stories in Thailand, but this is an English speaking forum.

There could always be volunteers.

[fashionista]

I'm waiting for the counterpoint stories where the Thai girl was the level-headed salt-of-the-earth and the farang non-Thai guy turned out to be the total wacko in creating the dysfunctional relationship. Maybe a long wait.

I'm sure there are lots of those stories in Thailand, but this is an English speaking forum.

not so sure. it takes a certain high level of ability and skill to get here and maintain ones self for any length of time, which i think would very quickly sort out the chaff from the wheat.

[Berkshire]

I'm waiting for the counterpoint stories where the Thai girl was the level-headed salt-of-the-earth and the farang non-Thai guy turned out to be the total wacko in creating the dysfunctional relationship. Maybe a long wait.

I'm certain this happens more often than not. But by the time the story hits the presses (i.e., the TV forum), the plot and main characters miraculously changes. I think they call this in the literary world "creative license." In Thailand, it can be translated to mean "my right to make sh*t up so I look good."

Disclaimer: Not saying this is the case with this thread....although it's hard to believe any woman can be so completely wacko.

[AngelsLariat]

I'm waiting for the counterpoint stories where the Thai girl was the level-headed salt-of-the-earth and the farang non-Thai guy turned out to be the total wacko in creating the dysfunctional relationship. Maybe a long wait.

I'm sure there are lots of those stories in Thailand, but this is an English speaking forum.

not so sure. it takes a certain high level of ability and skill to get here and maintain ones self for any length of time, which i think would very quickly sort out the chaff from the wheat.

It is indeed rare to meet a mentally unstable farang in Thailand.

Edited August 29, 2013 by AngelsLariat

[JLCrab]

Rashomon-effect

Ok, From WikiPedia: The Rashomon effect is a term that has been used by a number of different scholars, journalists and film critics to refer to contradictory interpretations of the same events by different persons, a problem that arises in the process of uncovering truth.

Edited August 29, 2013 by JLCrab

[NeverSure]

I'm waiting for the counterpoint stories where the Thai girl was the level-headed salt-of-the-earth and the farang non-Thai guy turned out to be the total wacko in creating the dysfunctional relationship. Maybe a long wait.

I'm sure there are lots of those stories in Thailand, but this is an English speaking forum.

not so sure. it takes a certain high level of ability and skill to get here and maintain ones self for any length of time, which i think would very quickly sort out the chaff from the wheat.

Then why, with all due respect, does so much of this "wheat" wind up totally taken in by an uneducated Isaan girl, or drink and maybe do drugs and hang around bars until they are ruined?

[fashionista]

I'm waiting for the counterpoint stories where the Thai girl was the level-headed salt-of-the-earth and the farang non-Thai guy turned out to be the total wacko in creating the dysfunctional relationship. Maybe a long wait.

I'm sure there are lots of those stories in Thailand, but this is an English speaking forum.

not so sure. it takes a certain high level of ability and skill to get here and maintain ones self for any length of time, which i think would very quickly sort out the chaff from the wheat.

Then why, with all due respect, does so much of this "wheat" wind up totally taken in by an uneducated Isaan girl, or drink and maybe do drugs and hang around bars until they are ruined?

these so called uneducated Isaan girls are also the ones most susceptible to dogs pissing in their ear, and if you havent noticed, farang very quickly attract more dogs than you can point a stick at. and these said dogs would hold world Olympic medals in pissing if there ever could be such a competition

Edited August 29, 2013 by fashionista

[historyprof]

I'm waiting for the counterpoint stories where the Thai girl was the level-headed salt-of-the-earth and the farang non-Thai guy turned out to be the total wacko in creating the dysfunctional relationship. Maybe a long wait.

I'm sure there are lots of those stories in Thailand, but this is an English speaking forum.

not so sure. it takes a certain high level of ability and skill to get here and maintain ones self for any length of time, which i think would very quickly sort out the chaff from the wheat.

Then why, with all due respect, does so much of this "wheat" wind up totally taken in by an uneducated Isaan girl, or drink and maybe do drugs and hang around bars until they are ruined?

Stereotypic balderdash. Are farm women less trustworthy than city women? ThaiVisa/Stickman. urban legend #12. What evidence do I have of this? Where is the PM from? Is she trustworthy? Nuff said eh? In my experience the more education and experience and travel a person has the less likely they are to stereotype. If the shoe fits......

[AngelsLariat]

I'm sure there are lots of those stories in Thailand, but this is an English speaking forum.

not so sure. it takes a certain high level of ability and skill to get here and maintain ones self for any length of time, which i think would very quickly sort out the chaff from the wheat.

Then why, with all due respect, does so much of this "wheat" wind up totally taken in by an uneducated Isaan girl, or drink and maybe do drugs and hang around bars until they are ruined?

these so called uneducated Isaan girls are also the ones most susceptible to dogs pissing in their ear, and if you havent noticed, farang very quickly attract more dogs than you can point a stick at. and these said dogs would hold world Olympic medals in pissing if there ever could be such a competition

This is an English language forum.

[manly100]

get married her then all will be solved. but just in case try to get a house with a basement.

[MrHammer]

TL/DR.

This and all other such cases boils down to someone not having enough selfrespect and balls to lay down the law the first time this happens.

How in the world can you continue to be with someone who physically threathens you or destroy things. Of course this didn't happen out of the blue, you let this this happen because you are a p*ssy.

Tough love bro, better start taking yourself seriously or no one else will.

[Ajaan]

God help me if I ever find myself needing the help of the unknown, faceless members of thaivisa to solve a personal problem.

I shouldn't really specifically mention TV members over any other local forum as a bad idea, the advice of complete strangers should always taken with a grain of salt.

But one has to question the number of internet experts willing to offer their worldly advice.

I hope the op is just another troll

The OP ASKED for advice. What would you have everyone do?

[laislica]

I'm waiting for the counterpoint stories where the Thai girl was the level-headed salt-of-the-earth and the farang non-Thai guy turned out to be the total wacko in creating the dysfunctional relationship. Maybe a long wait.

I'm sure there are lots of those stories in Thailand, but this is an English speaking forum.

not so sure. it takes a certain high level of ability and skill to get here and maintain ones self for any length of time, which i think would very quickly sort out the chaff from the wheat.

Then why, with all due respect, does so much of this "wheat" wind up totally taken in by an uneducated Isaan girl, or drink and maybe do drugs and hang around bars until they are ruined?

Have you read Stephen Leather;- A Private Dancer?

It´s downloadable and free - from the author, have a little Google.

[chrisartist]

Rashomon-effect

Ok, From WikiPedia: The Rashomon effect is a term that has been used by a number of different scholars, journalists and film critics to refer to contradictory interpretations of the same events by different persons, a problem that arises in the process of uncovering truth.

Derived from the film entitled "Rashomon", directed by Akira Kurosawa, which was in turn derived primarily from a short story entitled "In a Bamboo Grove" (note: not "Rashomon") by Ryonosuke Akutagawa. It's a superb film.

[Nana Cowboy]

Leave the country my friend. I wouldnt test any other options. Youre well being is at risk

[AlexRRR]

ahhh sounds like someone i know except shes not voilent but ho so jealouse and un trusting, i no longer respond to her stupid talk that often is enough to quiten her down if not i will throw a wobblie on yes theres a fight but i dont say things like its over i just get moody and quite half is an act but seems to work with her, over time she has gotten better but still has a sharp tounge.

I have made my TGF (and the fact she is 29 has been inportant becasue she is still open and baggage free to a point) see that her her talk is causing friction and trouble, its not perfect but it is better when were actualy togther than apart.

If shes such a looney i would be worried and the first think i would do is see a councilor, then get her to come with you and see one on her own, pretty basic stuff really.

[mesquite]

OP, welcome to the club. I solved this problem years ago by moving to a different hemisphere.