The new film about the Margaret Thatcher, the Iron Lady, has been classified as PG.

Apparently it is unsuitable for miners!

Tennis ball machine for sale, £100.
Had it for over a year now and its served me well.

I just found a half frozen tiny bird as I walked home, so I put it in my pocket to give it a chance of survival.
When I showed the wife, she told me how much she loved me for being so kind and sensitive, so I thought I'd try for a kiss & a cuddle as she was in a good mood.
She said "No dear, not in front of the chilled wren!"

Someone stole the fifth month out of my calendar. 

I am completely dismayed.

 

Does anyone know the tank type?