2 minutes ago, ballpoint said:

cracks me up ???? 

Trump did a very complicated puzzle in only one day.

It was for three month old's. 

17 minutes ago, ravip said:

My Ex can be your Ex.  

Thailand started to build its own high speed train based on a TukTuk frame. 

 A length of Rope went into a bar, sat on a stool, and ordered a beer. The Bartender said, "We don't serve Ropes here." Dismayed and disappointed, the Rope went out and then got an idea. He stopped a man and asked, "Will you please tie a knot in me and separate my strands at both ends?". The man obliged, and with this done, the Rope went back into the bar and again ordered a beer. The Bartender looked him over and said, "Say, aren't you the same rope who was in here before?!"

 

 

"No," was the reply, "I'm a frayed knot."

 The man had gone to the dentist for his annual checkup. The dentist asked the man if he had been eating anything over the past few months that was not ordinarily in his diet. The man said, "Why yes, I have as a matter of fact. My wife developed a new receipt for hollandise sauce that is just terrific and I have been putting it on almost everything that I eat." "Well", said the dentist, "I'm afraid that the acid in the lemon juice used in the hollandise sauce has started to corrode your dental plate. I'll have to make you a new plate. But this time, I'll make it out of chrome." "Out of chrome!" exclaimed the man. "Why would you do that?

".

"Because," said the dentist........"as everyone knows"......"there's no plate like chrome for the hollandise"

A man ran into the house breathless and he said to his wife, "Honey, you should be so proud of me, I just saved $1.50 by not taking the bus, but I chased it all the way home-‑‑ The wife replied, "You want a medal for that?-‑‑You should have chased a cab and saved yourself 15!

 Two sailors are eating biscuits together. One breaks a biscuit and two bugs, one large and one small, jump out and run across the table. The sailor asks his mate, "Now, is it better to eat the big one or the small one?" The other replied, "The answer is simple: you must always choose the lesser of two weevils."

 

 A little boy went up to his father and asked: "Dad, where did all of my intelligence come from?" The father replied: "Well, son, you must have gotten it from your mother, 'cause I still have mine."

.

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"It's personality that Soi 6 gals really want."

Fred Fudpucker, Lotto Winner.

 

I was talking to a girl on a dating site.

 

She said " I read your profile, 6 feet and 3 inches - you are big".

 

I replied "Not really, those are two separate measurements".

 

 

The first time my girlfriend saw my penis she exclaimed: "That's gross!"

 

She's German.

2 hours ago, sanuk711 said:

I'll drink to that!

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.R.I.P....................

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