Is this bar girl keen? Maybe a different story here

[Hansuman]

Hi everyone,

 

First time posting here. I had a look in other posts to see if I could find something similar with no luck. 

Apologies in advance if this has been mentioned already and I'm just another one of those "D**k heads" on this forum... 

 

My story is about 3 bar girls but I'll keep it at 1 for my post. And yes I realise they're prostitutes.

 

Day 1 - So I'm in Pattaya and I get talking to this bar girl (I'll call her Kate) and buy Kate a few lady drinks and leave alone to get some food shortly after. I tell Kate "what she wanted to hear" and say I'll come back which wasn't my plan originally...

 

Anyway I changed my mind and decided to go back for a drink.

When I get back to the bar Kate was gone... but as soon as another lady recognized me she got on her phone to call Kate and she tells me please wait because Kate will be back in 2mins she's playing pool. 

Sure enough Kate comes running up to me for a hug 2mins later.

 

Fast forward and Kate says if I pay the bar fine it will be cheaper for us to drink and we can play pool and have fun somewhere else.. 

Ok done.

 

We drink

We play pool etc..

 

Now she's in my hotel and ready for business and in my mind I'm thinking "what's the catch we haven't talked money"

Surely this isn't free?

So I ask a price before doing anything and we agree.

 

Day 2 - Kate leaves in the morning. 

I tell Kate I'll come in for a beer at the bar later that day.

I pay Kates bar fine again.

She stays with me for nothing that night.

 

Day 3 - I don't pay a bar fine and she stays with me all day.

 

Day 4 - I'm off to Bangkok and she said she'll come for free if I can help with food/drinks if we go out partying. 

Sure I agree.

 

Day 5, 6, 7 - We have fun.

We go shopping and I offer her money to buy whatever she wants and she rejects it.

I meet her friends one night.

I talk to her sister on the phone.

She tells me about past relationships and says she's honest with me about everything blah blah blah.

 

Day 8 - she's gone home and I'm somewhere else in Thailand now. 

Every day she messages me.

Video calls me.

Asks what I'm doing.

Tells me when she's been with customers. (Probably not all the time) but openly tells me if she was.

Tells me to have fun with other girls but would prefer if I didn't. 

Asks me everything about my day.

Tells me she misses me.

Tells me I can stay in her home for nothing when I come back to Thailand and don't have to pay to be with her.

 

Kate seems keen on me and doesn't want my money. She's constantly in contact with me now sending photos and video calls saying she misses me.

 

Further info.. were both the same age in our 30's. 

I'm an average looking guy, clean cut, dress smart casual.

She tells if she gets into a relationship with a man she'll leave the bar and get another job like she did with her last serious relationship. 

 

Could this girl genuinely be interested in me?

What's the catch?

I jokingly said she should come visit me in my country and she said she might do it next year. 

 

I would never take a relationship with any bar girl too seriously.

Again I realise they're prostitutes....

 

Looking forward to your opinions.

 

Cheers! 

[Thaiwrath]

9 minutes ago, Hansuman said:

Kate seems keen on me and doesn't want my money.

[Hansuman]

32 minutes ago, Thaiwrath said:

Good point. 

[A1Str8]

All this never try to take the bar out of the girl is nonsense. I have seen many, i mean many, that were eager to leave with a man like you(based on your description), nice looking, well dressed, etc and never look back.

The girlfriend of hers phoned her immediately when you showed up and she wasnt there, because Kate obviously told her friend, that wow, i really like this guy. Thats why they gave her the intel right away, your guy is here. If she wasnt into you, that would have never happened. You gotta watch the subtle signs, which they think you dont notice.
Of course, do not by any means trust her and think that oh yeah, she loves me. But you already know that. But if you like her and she clearly likes you, why not see where it goes. You just have to get clear with yourself from the beginning: you wont make fool moves! as in no money to her family, no moving to isaan, nothing goes under her name, not giving her large amounts of money, not believing everything she says and not letting her control any aspect of your life.
Here is how their brain works: if he is nice with me i am nice with him. if he gives me some money, i will be still forced to go with other guys. if he gives me more dough, then i wont have to. i can stop being a bar girl. if he leaves me, i will go back to the bar. if he cheats on me, i will take revenge. Pretty simple.
All you have to do is clearly let her know by your actions and words the next time you meet her, that you are not one of these clowns that she can take advantage of. Have fun with her, get to know her  but keep a keen eye on her. Never mind what she says. By their actions you shall know them.
And who cares if she is a slut. Every girl is, i know from experience. They just wont say it ,like these girls do. And what would you do if you were in their shoes? You either work at 7-11 and never make ends meet or use the only asset you were given and go with guys.
Its actually quite easy to see, whether she is the type of bar girl, that would leave this job behind, the moment she gets a chance or the one that has no aspirations and is totally hopeless. Watch her behaviour. How does she conduct herself? Watch the things she does for others. Is she a shrewd little thing or a pleasant one to be around? Does she do drugs? A lot of them do. If yes, run. She wont quit. Its actually so simple to read people, especially women, because they are more emotional by design. Which is easy to read. 

[AlexRich]

By the sound of it Kate's definitely a keeper ... I mean free sex must count for something, right? Next step is to take the lovely Kate up to her family in Nakon Nowhere and arrange the ceremony. While you're up there you could peruse the land that Kate has been given by her family to build a house on. Once you get a local architect and builder involved it will be up in no time. Next step is to arrange the Sin Sod and pay off the family loans and acquire a truck. Once the animals are bought and the machinery is in place you will find yourself persona non grata. Then you can write all about it on Thai Visa. Everybody loves a happy ending. 

[Puchaiyank]

Been coming to Thailand for many years...retired here now...experienced many Kates along the way...all fun...

 

My philosophy...if it looks like an interesting train ride...board the train...enjoy the ride...if it derails...walk away...keep your happy memories...

[thaibeachlovers]

26 minutes ago, Puchaiyank said:

Been coming to Thailand for many years...retired here now...experienced many Kates along the way...all fun...

 

My philosophy...if it looks like an interesting train ride...board the train...enjoy the ride...if it derails...walk away...keep your happy memories...

Don't you mean "WHEN it derails".

[thaibeachlovers]

5 hours ago, Hansuman said:

Further info.. were both the same age in our 30's. 

I'm an average looking guy, clean cut, dress smart casual.

She tells if she gets into a relationship with a man she'll leave the bar and get another job like she did with her last serious relationship. 

Consider that her average customer is retired, on a budget, overweight and possibly unhealthy, is too small ( size does matter, no matter what lies they tell ), too quick, and is no prospect for supporting the family.

Young man is better looking than old fogey, does sex better, and has the potential to support family for many decades. In her shoes, would you do the long con if you thought it was the key to future happiness?

As said, enjoy the ride, but it's not true love.

Bargirls are bargirls for 2 reasons; to make money and to find a rich husband.

[Hummin]

8 minutes ago, thaibeachlovers said:

Don't you mean "WHEN it derails".

Goes off tracks

[madmen]

Nearly all first posts these days launch straight into a thousand word essay

[Skallywag]

Kate Hudson, Kate Winslet, Kate Blanchet, Kate Moss....all Kates are interested in you. 

 

Everything is temporary, enjoy it while it lasts, you are living the dream ????

[NanLaew]

1 hour ago, thaibeachlovers said:

Don't you mean "WHEN it derails".

No, "IF"

 

2,831 happy wheel tappers and shunters can't be wrong.

[BritManToo]

7 hours ago, Hansuman said:

I would never take a relationship with any bar girl too seriously.

Again I realise they're prostitutes....

Why not, it'll be cheaper than a wife from your home country.

And the sex will be good ....... and often.

Edited March 7, 2019 by BritManToo

[WorriedNoodle]

How come the username Hansuman hasn't already been done on TV? I'm sure it was my old username on Usenet back in the 80s?

[tingtongtourist]

"You dont lose your Thai gf, you only lose your spot in the line"

So true but still so many dont get it!

 

Quite simple really.

-If she have 5 guys in the loop, she will keep all 5, until 1 will marry or 1

will provide the life so they wont have to do this kind of thing for a living.

 

why would they only have 1 exclusive bf? when all these deadbeat farangs lie to them, then brag to all about getting free sex, and then go home?

 

If you really like her and think she ok, then be the guy who will provide

..or risk someone else taking her.

 

you most likely can come back 3 years later and she will still claim to be single and be your gf,

though dont be suprised if she still have several other "possibles" just like you.

 

And before all the usual thaivisa wiseguys (thats the ones with the batchelor degree wife)

 come here saying i spend to long with bargirls..

NO!

your so-called normal Thai girl do this exact same tactic

When they work in a normal job they dont have to desperately rely on farang for money

but to be sure, if you get the wrong (normal) one  she will fleece you dry quicker than any bargirl!!!!

 

[NCC1701A]

these first time posts are all structurally the same now.

 

you need to change your writing style a bit more with each new account.

[Boomhauer]

It's a trap dude. I have yet to hear a happy ending about a guy that meets a girl in a bar. All of these stories share one basic similarity: They all end in disaster.

 

Good luck and be careful out there!

[samsensam]

5 hours ago, madmen said:

Nearly all first posts these days launch straight into a thousand word essay

 

yea, they are usually troll click bait, at least this guy put some effort into his, probable, troll post. and thankfully for a change non of the usual, intentional, linguistic errors.

[HLover]

12 hours ago, Hansuman said:

I'm just another one of those "D**k heads" on this forum... 

Not necessarily. It takes more than just one post to bestow judgement.

Edited March 7, 2019 by HLover
..

[Kwasaki]

13 hours ago, Hansuman said:

I had a look in other posts to see if I could find something similar with no luck.

You gotta be kidding me.

[faraday]

1. Are you a good dancer?

2. Good looking?

3. Great well paid job?

4. Thinking about buying a £100,000 restaurant here?

5. Able to 'perform' 4x a night?

[dotpoom]

When I seen the headline I said to myself "this is going to be a small book size post"...

[kingstonkid]

The other thing to do is keep your wallet with you and at night lock it up.

 

I learned the hard way.  The one I had even figured out my atm pin that is how i caught her.

but a hundred here a thousand there you can sometimes not notice.

 

[wombat]

marry her now.

[wombat]

3 hours ago, Boomhauer said:

It's a trap dude. I have yet to hear a happy ending about a guy that meets a girl in a bar. All of these stories share one basic similarity: They all end in disaster.

 

Good luck and be careful out there!

get with the program.. tell TV you have a successful relationship ?......RRTFPMSL 

[BWPattaya]

I have a friend who visited a girl in Southern Philippines. She had her own business and paid for everything. She came to visit him in Chiang Mai then told him he must marry her. Have children together and move to the Philippines. 

Some bide their time, hang in for the long game. 

Having said that, enjoy it all whilst it lasts. 

[stigar]

I been married 11 year with a former bargirl..we have 2 kids together..she live in norway now and our kids too.

¤5 year ago she went to visit her family alone wioth our ids...didnt want me to go same time.She came back after 2 months..

I thougth she look fatter..and her stomack get bigger..i ask why..she admit she was pregnant with her secret thailover..

I divorced her rigth away.Even i speak thai she and her family lies to me for 15 years.Her father is nice and honest.He told me when we drinking beer together that my son is not mine,but son of her thailover.I contacted the court in norway and they decide after my story that they orded she to bring my son for DNA-test before 4th of march.The judge said also that if she dont go to the hospital and take DNA-test the police will go to her and bring she and my son to the hospital.After we divorced she have borrow about 450,000 bath from me.Now she refuse to pay back!!!!!!!My lawyer get every transactions from my bank,so now shes in deep shit.

 

[soistalker]

All the bar fines you didnt pay plus freelancer fees to a freelancer = you get roped into buying and putting houses, condos, and cars into her name.

[AlexRich]

2 hours ago, faraday said:

1. Are you a good dancer?

2. Good looking?

3. Great well paid job?

4. Thinking about buying a £100,000 restaurant here?

5. Able to 'perform' 4x a night?

 

Not 4.

 

... but 4 out of 5 ain't bad!

 

 

 

 

[AlexRich]

16 minutes ago, stigar said:

I been married 11 year with a former bargirl..we have 2 kids together..she live in norway now and our kids too.

¤5 year ago she went to visit her family alone wioth our ids...didnt want me to go same time.She came back after 2 months..

I thougth she look fatter..and her stomack get bigger..i ask why..she admit she was pregnant with her secret thailover..

I divorced her rigth away.Even i speak thai she and her family lies to me for 15 years.Her father is nice and honest.He told me when we drinking beer together that my son is not mine,but son of her thailover.I contacted the court in norway and they decide after my story that they orded she to bring my son for DNA-test before 4th of march.The judge said also that if she dont go to the hospital and take DNA-test the police will go to her and bring she and my son to the hospital.After we divorced she have borrow about 450,000 bath from me.Now she refuse to pay back!!!!!!!My lawyer get every transactions from my bank,so now shes in deep shit.

 

 

That is a very bad situation. What relationship will you have with son number 2? 

 

There are some who have done similar to you and it worked out okay ... but your story is a cautionary tale.