How much for the wifes holiday back home in Issan?

[helloagain]

I pay for wifes flights. A hire car for her time there and 1000 baht a day while she there. I give another 1000 baht for each way for food and drinks on flight or airport. Thats it. If she rolls eyes tell her start saving cos next time she gets nothing. I give 30000 a month

[Enki]

35 minutes ago, thaibeachlovers said:

More likely they would cook it themselves at home, so just the cost of ingredients. When my wife's family came to visit, she always cooked for them- NEVER bought food ready cooked.

Sure, that happens sometimes. But you are aware that 90% of the Thai can not cook or don't want to cook and either go out or buy street food?

No idea what you want to accomplish by trolling here around.

[1FinickyOne]

On 3/12/2019 at 10:03 PM, Kenny202 said:

just dont see how people who have grown up so poor can become so selfish and entitled

Yes. Only the rich should be selfish and entitled... the heck with everyone else. Like the Pattaya 2 week millionaires? 

[1FinickyOne]

When you visit your poor upcountry family, it is nice to be able to give some cash to your mother and father...

 

just sayin. 

 

That is being part of a family. 'No Thai lady can enjoy drinking out of fine crystal when her mother is drinking from a coconut shell.' 

[JRG23]

I can relate. But I now give my wife about 700 a day for travels to her home town (not including fuel).

Yes, she has a moan for more but she knows can't justify it because she never actually buys anything apart from food.  

 

[thailand49]

We bring our western ways and think it should work here, I hear it every day from expats "  I tell you exactly what to do "  In the end, you are in the driver seat the one that has to control the vehicle. See whether people want to believe it or not but their school system is mainly the blame for not teaching them to critically think instead spend more time teaching them how to be lead by others. In general, they are like to sleep or monkey sees monkey do. Logic doesn't have a thing to do with anything because the expectation they have for farangs although should be the same for a Thai man isn't. What isn't understood by Thais is once you are with a farang (aka ATM) in time they too are view as one but they will never accept or recognized it themselves until they get burn and their hearts and minds are open to hearing the truth. 

You need to learn to recognize that opening and hope to have a conversation to built a foundation but does that mean life will be better hell no!  In time, even if they get it or come around a bit they will become comfortable when they do it is back to the same thing. It is hard work frustrating keeping the straight path,  you will find there are times you compromise but expect that never to happen for them in the manner we want it to?

When it comes to the amount it seems a lot to us for 3 days, but below the surface more going on than they will ever tell you?  As noted, it is about face, showing off, and the expectation she herself has been brainwashed by her own culture that she has to provide and providing is thru you the main reason she is married to you.  We don't want to hear it but that is the truth!

In my own relationship, we travel to her farm for 3 or 4 days that is as much as I can take and her mother and family have never asked me for anything good simple people but does that mean I just take it for granted she doesn't need money and let her crash and burn?

Prior to the trip, I try to have a conversation to prod her without her knowing to gain insight into the trip I find there is always some plan but don't want to tell you directly or can't. Even when I determine I know what is expected when we are there we do a bit of shopping prior to our visit, then when there food for the family get together to cook themselves or go out to eat when Thais eat you got to supply beer or liquor. When we are there I take her mom to Big C to buy living supplies usually another 2000 baht this is for the year. I get it out of her what is reasonable to give her mother to make her comfortable,  she lives on 1000 baht a month for S.S. the rest the brothers and family help out. After all these years I pretty much just round it out to 10,000 baht she needs to distribute to her mom and brothers this is all face whether people like it or not that is my situation you will need to find yours?

[soistalker]

I would have taken the money back out of her greedy palm, and not return it.

[soistalker]

I really love these employer/employee type of relationships. 

[mehrdad]

If i leaves country for 1 month i give she only 8000 ,,

so this is enough!

because she no need to pay for home and car and electricity and water  ! 

Only buy some food !

 

[Mangkhut]

Why pay for another grown up individual? Isnt she able to make an income for herself and pay her own bills and expenses? 

 

Stop feeding the wolfs, one day they will come after you....

[crickets]

Just now, Mangkhut said:

Why pay for another grown up individual? Isnt she able to make an income for herself and pay her own bills and expenses? 

 

Stop feeding the wolfs, one day they will come after you....

Looking after 2 kids under 3 full time. cooking / cleaning, she cant make an income as well. Same happened with my mum and dad. 

[Nanaplaza666]

On 3/12/2019 at 9:45 PM, champers said:

While she is away go and spend 8000 Baht on yourself over the same period to make yourself feel better. If you come to Pattaya you could easily spend that much in one day with a bit of imagination.

5555 also without any imagination you could spend that money in pattaya with a bit of imagination you could easely spend 5 fold 

[murraynz]

On 3/13/2019 at 2:03 AM, Kenny202 said:

I tried for 7 years on a wild goose chase to make my ex happy. They will run you and your finances into the ground without a thought for you or your future. Ive seen blokes blow many millions of baht on homes cars businesses for nothing more than bragging rights for the wife and a few facebook selfies. Not sure on your wifes background but I just dont see how people who have grown up so poor can become so selfish and entitled. Scratching around the floor for 20 baht 1 minute and the next wanting to live like the queen of Sheba. I used to ask mine what she did for me? Best she could come up with was "I live with you everyday". Country people here love to talk about sharing and call others stingy etc, but never seem to consider what theyre bringing to the party. My view now is if they want to see themself as a commodity where you have to pay....then you have the right to also shop around. Most can be upgraded / replaced in hours here

very well written....take notice guys....there is NO  need to get married and endure all this pain....

there are thousands of beautiful thai ladies, looking for a nice time..all easily replaced...

in most cases, it is actually cheaper with casual relationships...

[dougiemac57]

I have the same problem. When I was unemployed I told her to sell the car that I was paying for as I couldn't afford but all I get is the moans of her having to pay. It was with monies that I had sent to her anyway so what is her problem. Now I am slithering to walk away from it all together. 

Expects me to help her son . He is 25 years old but because no thinking in starting work on his own I am expected to help. I said NO

[BestB]

6 hours ago, pr9spk said:

100% wrong! I just don't deal with ladies of the night with sick buffalos.

 

I leave that for people like you.

Yeah I know , Thai educated and well off ladies love to be with someone triple their weight and double their age, someone like you.

 

sadly someone like me has to deal with the rest 

[Quack]

Sounds like your 'wife' married you for one reason only... Mine will always smile and hug me no matter what amount of money I give her, and for a trip back home to Isan it's almost always a lot less than 8K...

[kensisaket]

On 3/12/2019 at 10:13 PM, worgeordie said:

It's all about face,she has to flash a bit money around .hope she brings

you some change.

regards worgeordie

Mia farang, 'nough said.  

[55Jay]

5 hours ago, faraday said:

What are you on about Jay?

Duran Duran were Yugoslavian....

Everybody knows that.

????

[BritManToo]

48 minutes ago, Quack said:

Sounds like your 'wife' married you for one reason only... Mine will always smile and hug me no matter what amount of money I give her, and for a trip back home to Isan it's almost always a lot less than 8K...

But you still give her money ..............

[jingjai9]

Dear Friend, You have the same issues as I - You are not comfortable with certain aspects of relationships in Thai culture. I have friends whose Thai GF's consume money. These guys shrug their shoulders and tolerate it, I personnally CANNOT and therefore, have been single the past 8 years. I love Thailand and its people, but I cannot navigate relationships with Thai women long term, so I do not go there. Many people I know have good relationships, but perhaps they possess qualities I do not have, that's life. THINK ABOUT This, it will happen again.

[Kadilo]

37 minutes ago, BritManToo said:

But you still give her money ..............

 

37 minutes ago, BritManToo said:

But you still give her money ..............

Double post

Edited March 14, 2019 by Kadilo

[Kadilo]

36 minutes ago, BritManToo said:

But you still give her money ..............

“Almost always less than 8000”

Edited March 14, 2019 by Kadilo

[473geo]

4 hours ago, thaibeachlovers said:

More likely they would cook it themselves at home, so just the cost of ingredients. When my wife's family came to visit, she always cooked for them- NEVER bought food ready cooked.

Why does that not surprise me given the tone of your posts regarding financial support

[baansgr]

On 3/12/2019 at 10:20 PM, crickets said:

I thought thats how it works with husbands. We allocate money for the wife to spend.

 

To spend within the household yes but bet your bottom dollar op is paying  all bills food etc and that 20k goes straight  to the jungle. 

[baansgr]

33 minutes ago, jingjai9 said:

Dear Friend, You have the same issues as I - You are not comfortable with certain aspects of relationships in Thai culture. I have friends whose Thai GF's consume money. These guys shrug their shoulders and tolerate it, I personnally CANNOT and therefore, have been single the past 8 years. I love Thailand and its people, but I cannot navigate relationships with Thai women long term, so I do not go there. Many people I know have good relationships, but perhaps they possess qualities I do not have, that's life. THINK ABOUT This, it will happen again.

And their main quality is a healthy  bank account 

[DjSilver]

Stop giving her any money. I understand it might be hard for you to stop paying her for sex because that is just what you are doing. And that means she is still a prostitute even if you married your prostitute.

[losworld]

1 hour ago, Quack said:

Sounds like your 'wife' married you for one reason only... Mine will always smile and hug me no matter what amount of money I give her, and for a trip back home to Isan it's almost always a lot less than 8K...

until the money runs out lol

[473geo]

7 hours ago, thaibeachlovers said:

Um, back in the west, where we on here all come from, wives do that and go to work as well. If they are lucky, husband shares the home work.

Why should Thai wives be different?

Even if I could afford to do it, I wouldn't, as don't have kids and don't want a wife that sits around watching soaps, gossiping all day on her phone and getting fat, just so she can sweep the floor and cook some food.

BTW, given the culture gap, marriage in LOS and in the west are different beasts.

" if I could afford to do it, I wouldn't, as don't have kids and don't want a wife"

Excellent decision for you couldn't agree more

 

I have a wife and kids and yes we do have the luxury of buying food at the local market on occasion. My son is off on a school trip tomorrow we will happily pay for that too. I guess we are just extravagant - so be it ????

[EVENKEEL]

My old lady and daughter are making a trip north. Taxi and plane tickets are 7000bht alone, one way. So stop whining about a measely 8000bht spending money. Some of the responses are hilarious, obviously from broken households.

 

20,000bht mo. sounds about right. Anyone who has a problem with a mother of 2 kids not working if the father can take care of them financially is the product of a dysfunctional family.

[Vacuum]

4 hours ago, helloagain said:

I pay for wifes flights. A hire car for her time there and 1000 baht a day while she there. I give another 1000 baht for each way for food and drinks on flight or airport. Thats it. If she rolls eyes tell her start saving cos next time she gets nothing. I give 30000 a month

Sounds like she hit the jackpot.