Another one bites the dust (me)

[owl sees all]

11 minutes ago, holy cow cm said:

Thai women are always very irritable. Women don't like men talking as they think the foreign men are acting like women (them). Can come to the point where they think you are not Thai enough for them and that is what they want, and then because they think you are not, their heritage and nationalism kicks in rearing its ugly head that you know nothing. 

I think that Thai women are unpredictable emotionally. Don't get two days the same with my 'beloved'.

 

There are a coupe of things to consider here;

 

firstly, would it bother you to have to start again? And would it bother her? Yes I read the words; 4  wasted years, etc., but if you just up and left it would be a loss of face for her. This would play on her mind.

 

Secondly; are there any nice bits of fluff in your village, that would appreciate a kind hearted, steady, calm farang?

 

 

[xylophone]

7 minutes ago, Pravda said:

 

I probably would.... if my visa wasn't expiring in a week.

 

Great timing!

Good luck whatever you do, and one thing I forgot to mention is that although she blurted out those words to you in some sort of anger, it probably is reality deep down inside for her and I don't think that will ever change.

[CharlieH]

1 minute ago, Pravda said:

 

She won't sign the papers.

Ah, so from that I assume you are on the "marriage" visa.

 

Well, you could try, dont sign that I wont sign divorce, but if she has already said that then it seems she is serious. 

 

No problem, just do a border run gives you a couple months to decide what you want to do.

 

[thequietman]

36 minutes ago, DepDavid said:

I think no need to leave. Give it a bit of time do some simple traveling and see how you feel about it later. Don’t make those big decisions in a hurry. Best of luck either way an let us know how it turns out.


Sent from my iPhone using Thaivisa Connect

Sound advice.

 

Wife told me to leave before when I was being a prick. My bad completely, I was surprised she didn't crack before.

 

Since then, we are getting on great (long may it continue). I am much more laid back now and don't take anything serious any more. Get upset occasionally but she lets me vent.

 

However, being told to go is not nice, so I have warned her not to say it again. If there is an issue we can talk it out. She tells me to go one more time and I told her I will leave immediately. She hasn't said it since and that's years ago. 

 

Take a bit of time away and give her time to calm down. If she still feels this way, then off you go for a new start. You're still young ....kinda ????

[BritManToo]

1 minute ago, thequietman said:

However, being told to go is not nice, so I have warned her not to say it again. If there is an issue we can talk it out. She tells me to go one more time and I told her I will leave immediately. She hasn't said it since and that's years ago. 

Made you look sort of 'weak' though.

[thequietman]

Just now, BritManToo said:

Made you look sort of 'weak' though.

Explain please.

[CharlieH]

Off topic posts removed.

[freedomnow]

money issues will just split you both apart, if not now later....100%....it's all in your cheap charlie sentence...she wants a go-getter and you sound like a chilled out happy with what you have type...

 

get out while you are younger than tomorrow unless you can bring the money to the table..

these Thai girls are catching up with the western ones due to pervasive access to the web....the social media crap bombards them with what they don't have have 24/7....fake life friend photos rule supreme or instagrammers punting their latest item to let you in on a slice of their world....

[BritManToo]

31 minutes ago, CharlieH said:

Get the visa done, she cant do it (divorce) on her own no matter what she wants.

 

He's right!

Tell her no VISA, then no divorce.

I'd do a multi entry from Suvannakhet, just need the marriage cert and copies of her ID/house book.

15 months (in 90 day chunks) for 2kbht.

[luckyluke]

Know my wife since 2000.

 

Due to circumstances (her 2 children) we decided a few years ago to have a L.A.T. (Living apart together) relation, instead of the eventuality of a rupture. 

 

Her children coming first. 

 

This suit us best.

 

We are about 15 days together in a month (in 3-4 times). 

[seajae]

I was honest with my wife from the start, she is a business woman, she owns the house and a set of units she bought after we married, we have land I am paying for too, she earns more than me but I pay my way, give her money each month to cover some of the payments plus for food and bills, I also buy dinner when we go out(often).

We have also had some fights, basically she doesnt like to admit fault, something many thais seem to have, she also doesnt like talking about it because that makes it worse for her.

Bottom line is we do love each other and that trumps everything else, we may not talk to each other for a day or so but we both know how we feel about each other and it sorts itself out and we will talk about it a few days later.

From what you have written it seems your wife holds a grudge against you, do you give her money towards household costs and pay when you go out? Even though she may be financially well off you still need to pay your way or you do look like a cheap charlie living off her which will cause her to look down on you.

Maybe you need to talk to her and find out exactly why she is frustrated with you, maybe a change in your behaviour will make a difference especially if you are bludging on her, talking may help a lot

[freedomnow]

Dear GOD, I cannot stop visiting this website for one more comment...one more thread...it has to end...haha.

 

Good luck OP !

[Pravda]

9 minutes ago, BritManToo said:

I'd do a multi entry from Suvannakhet, just need the marriage cert and copies of her ID/house book.

 

You don't need the signatures?

[tingtongtourist]

 ANY relationship anywhere will not survive if female thinks

" there is no benefit to me at all" or

 " I getting nothing out of this"

 

And dont believe posters here who say they never contribute 1 baht.

complete BS!

 

If can afford to have a woman around, you must get skilled and play this game.

Contribute yes, but just enough, without being a walking ATM.

 

sex and the pบssy are a commidity here, that is the truth.

Even if you had a good girl it wont be long before some thai will convince her she is an idiot for

" giving away to the farang for free"

 

OP, if money running low, its really best to get out and do it alone

before you are totally skint.

(because for sure, they WONT look after you then!)

 

you can take care yourself and live cheap in Thailand, happy alone with the right attitude.

even a few LTs and STs now and then will never cost what marriage does.

 

The example from Thai guys will tells you marriage is for mugs here!

Thats why they run away, so not to be milked dry and then deserted..

 

And even worse for us because everything here is set up to benefit Thais: not farang!

 

your marriage visa finished: get out next week!!

 

Ask yourself what Thai woman ask..

"what am i getting out of this??"

they even make the marriage visa rules to be benefit them.unbelievable!!

 

 and what you get:

1. Pay for a bit of mediocre uninterested sex,

2. the pleasure of slowly getting milked dry.

3. the pleasure of providing everything then in the end being insulted, disrespected and called names and kee-niaw

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

[CharlieH]

7 minutes ago, Pravda said:

 

You don't need the signatures?

No, just the paperwork.

[Olmate]

9 minutes ago, CharlieH said:

No, just the paperwork.

Can it be done as / changed to retirement and be done with the marriage part,then if marriage over OP is not over that barrel?

[Pravda]

1 minute ago, Olmate said:

Can it be done as / changed to retirement and be done with the marriage part,then if marriage over OP is not over that barrel?

 

I'm 45, I don't qualify for retirement visa.

 

Charlie, I am reading some replies from UbonJoe and it states that copies of marriage cert, blue book and id card need to be signed by wife.

[BritManToo]

Just now, Pravda said:

 

I'm 45, I don't qualify for retirement visa.

 

Charlie, I am reading some replies from UbonJoe and it states that copies of marriage cert, blue book and id card need to be signed by wife.

They do need her signature, but that's when you say no signatures, no divorce.

Your leaving without divorce will harm her more than it will harm you.

[Liverpudlian]

You are strolling out that door you came sliding out of, make the most of what you have left and sod any one else.

[CharlieH]

3 minutes ago, Pravda said:

 

I'm 45, I don't qualify for retirement visa.

 

Charlie, I am reading some replies from UbonJoe and it states that copies of marriage cert, blue book and id card need to be signed by wife.

If UJ is stating that then you can take it as required. 

As I said earlier "no sign no divorce".

 

[Olmate]

3 minutes ago, Pravda said:

 

I'm 45, I don't qualify for retirement visa.

 

Charlie, I am reading some replies from UbonJoe and it states that copies of marriage cert, blue book and id card need to be signed by wife.

Oh missed that,@ 45 must be more to life than this hassle.

[giddyup]

As Nina Simone said, "If love is no longer being served it's time to get up and leave the table".

[sanemax]

1 hour ago, owl sees all said:

 

Secondly; are there any nice bits of fluff in your village, that would appreciate a kind hearted, steady, calm farang?

 

 

Theres only one way to find out, he should go around the village knocking on peoples doors and asking them whether that household needs a husband and whether he could move in or not , may as well carry his bags around with him  .

[moe666]

2 hours ago, ezzra said:

Sigh.. marrying a Thai is a crapshoot game in the best of times, they're simply wired differently to us non Thai and that gap CAN NEVER be bridged no matter how hard you try, what to do now? bide your time, see what changes the winds will bring, all in all, better now than later...

Has nothing to do with Thais it is the fact they are females, two american wives both a couple of ding bats. I have been with the same Thai woman for 9 years and married for 3 like any relationship ups and downs. I will take the Thai over the Americans in a heart beat, she doesn't expect me to be more than I am.

Always remember there are two people involved so 2 sides to every story

[petermik]

9 hours ago, Pravda said:

I was expecting to be ridiculed by now, but hey I'll take the good wishes.

 

I am actually in a very bad mood today. Haven't slept all night. This is one way of venting.

I have been in a relationship here for 6 years with a middle aged well educated girl and as yet I have had no issues....BUT if ever the day comes when I feel there is no future I will either leave or tell her to go.

I learnt a long time ago back in the UK to never rely on any woman....only yourself can do this 100%......there are many ladies here and if your not happy walk away,move on and don,t look back.

Good luck in the future and remember "why make one woman miserable when you can make so many happy"  

[holy cow cm]

30 minutes ago, BritManToo said:

They do need her signature, but that's when you say no signatures, no divorce.

Your leaving without divorce will harm her more than it will harm you.

They always want the wife to go too. so hard case here.

[Pravda]

3 minutes ago, holy cow cm said:

They always want the wife to go too. so hard case here.

It's not an extension.

[Will27]

1 hour ago, Pravda said:

 

She won't sign the papers.

 

I mean she won't sign the copies. id card, marriage cert......

If she won't even sign the papers, she's pretty much telling you everything you need to know.

Even is she wants to go ahead and separate, surely signing the papers wouldn't hurt her.

 

Going back now would mean a life of being her doormat.

At 45, you're young.

Move on.

[mike787]

2 hours ago, Puchaiyank said:

I've never married in Thailand...have avoided countless divorces...????

This guy is brilliant!  Adding to that DO NOT  invest anything in Thailand.  Makes life easier, hassle free existence, and exit.

[donim]

3 hours ago, Pravda said:

24 hours before seems happy, hug, hug, chatty laughing.......

And tommorow she will again.

 

This reoccurs every month here along with a regular visit to the loo.