Getting into a relationship with a bar girl

[OneMoreFarang]

56 minutes ago, BobBKK said:

You take a girl from the bar and deserve everything you get. They are all 'new' and 'cashiers' and 'their first night'. Jeeze!

 

rent don't buy

Yes, you are right that the guys shouldn't be surprised if the relationship is not all happiness.

But somehow that sounds like relationships with "normal" girls work better. Do they?

I hears lots of stories from guys who decided to meet "normal" girls. Some even married those normal girls.

I don't get the impression that those relationships are in average so much better.

[watcharacters]

 

Why are these nieve posts so often made by "recently joined members"?

 

[BobBKK]

Just now, OneMoreFarang said:

Yes, you are right that the guys shouldn't be surprised if the relationship is not all happiness.

But somehow that sounds like relationships with "normal" girls work better. Do they?

I hears lots of stories from guys who decided to meet "normal" girls. Some even married those normal girls.

I don't get the impression that those relationships are in average so much better.

Well with the cultural differences, huge age gaps and a completely different concept of ethics it's hardly surprising things can go wrong but there are exceptions. Bar girls are hired for sex and so I have no concept why anyone would think it's a good idea to marry one. I have been here 10 years and never once felt the urge to have a GF here let alone marry. It just boggles my mind why anyone would do it. I'm here to relax and enjoy my retirement not Thai dramas. We will never 100% be accepted here so why try? we are strangers in a strange land.

[Kwasaki]

9 hours ago, thisisrascal said:

as far as I'm concerned bar girls are there to serve a purpose whilst you're in Thailand, but I have just had a rather threatening call from an English bloke telling me to stay away from a bar girl who was a good girl, and I a good customer, as he is now in a relationship with her. 

His fallen in luv so why are you concerned. 

[Bullie]

8 hours ago, SenorJorge said:

"Relationship" isnt the term you want to use.  Not for prostitutes and even former prostitutes in Thailand.

 

I would go as far to say that any Thai woman who speaks even a moderate amount of English in a farang-dominated area may fall into this category.

 

Your "relationship" isn't a relationship at all, it is a BUSINESS TRANSACTION.  Remember that.  Even if you marry, its a business transaction.  Forever.

And how does that differ from a western marriage? Friend of mine, decidedly unattractive, could never find a girlfriend...got himself a position with a reputable law firm  after graduation, women swarmed. Now married, two kids. Not a business transaction, you say?

[Bullie]

5 hours ago, Isaanbiker said:

I fully agree! But when you get married to one, it's a very painful business transaction.  

I disagree. Married one 12 years ago, we have a wonderful 10 year old son, moved to Europe and I could not wish for a better wife, devoted and caring.

[thaibeachlovers]

8 hours ago, SenorJorge said:

"Relationship" isnt the term you want to use.  Not for prostitutes and even former prostitutes in Thailand.

 

I would go as far to say that any Thai woman who speaks even a moderate amount of English in a farang-dominated area may fall into this category.

 

Your "relationship" isn't a relationship at all, it is a BUSINESS TRANSACTION.  Remember that.  Even if you marry, its a business transaction.  Forever.

Nothing wrong with a business transaction, as long as both parties honour the agreement.

Many western women look at marriage as a business transaction once the bloom of lust has worn off, as in "how much can I get when I divorce him".

[BritManToo]

1 hour ago, BobBKK said:

Bar girls are hired for sex and so I have no concept why anyone would think it's a good idea to marry one.

I was replacing the children I lost in my previous divorce.

Very reasonable price to hire a womb for a few years.

The kids are great.

[thaibeachlovers]

7 minutes ago, Bullie said:

And how does that differ from a western marriage? Friend of mine, decidedly unattractive, could never find a girlfriend...got himself a position with a reputable law firm  after graduation, women swarmed. Now married, two kids. Not a business transaction, you say?

Any rich or famous guy will find himself with offers from women that wouldn't look at him sideways if he wasn't rich or famous. How many girls would Jagger have scored with if he was Mick the garbage man?

[thisisrascal]

18 minutes ago, Kwasaki said:

His fallen in luv so why are you concerned. 

I just think it's funny that some guy would threaten another guy over a girl who will shortly be moving onto a different customer. 

Edited June 17, 2019 by thisisrascal

[thaibeachlovers]

1 hour ago, BobBKK said:

Well with the cultural differences, huge age gaps and a completely different concept of ethics it's hardly surprising things can go wrong but there are exceptions. Bar girls are hired for sex and so I have no concept why anyone would think it's a good idea to marry one. I have been here 10 years and never once felt the urge to have a GF here let alone marry. It just boggles my mind why anyone would do it. I'm here to relax and enjoy my retirement not Thai dramas. We will never 100% be accepted here so why try? we are strangers in a strange land.

Speaking as one that did, she was so great when I met her, and indeed for the year we lived together, I married her because I thought she was worth it. I don't know why she changed, but that will perplex me till my dying day.

[1FinickyOne]

1 minute ago, thaibeachlovers said:

Any rich or famous guy will find himself with offers from women that wouldn't look at him sideways if he wasn't rich or famous. How many girls would Jagger have scored with if he was Mick the garbage man?

The year Lee IaCoca turned around Chrysler - he was voted sexiest man of the year... if he was working the line and wearing a hard hat he would have had a hard time getting a date on Saturday Night... 

 

That said, smarts and money can be sexy... 

[thaibeachlovers]

1 hour ago, OneMoreFarang said:

Yes, you are right that the guys shouldn't be surprised if the relationship is not all happiness.

But somehow that sounds like relationships with "normal" girls work better. Do they?

I hears lots of stories from guys who decided to meet "normal" girls. Some even married those normal girls.

I don't get the impression that those relationships are in average so much better.

Indeed. Some of the nicest women I ever met, and usually the most attractive ones, were not "normal", whatever that means.

Conversely, some of the most horrid and unattractive ones I ever met were not.

[1FinickyOne]

1 hour ago, BobBKK said:

Well with the cultural differences, huge age gaps and a completely different concept of ethics it's hardly surprising things can go wrong but there are exceptions.

Don't worry - you can probably change... then you can get out and enjoy yourself a bit in your retirement... [just kidding - a little] 

[mercman24]

you are missing out, she sends me *bottomless* photos, and very nice they are to, and me,?  i am in a relationship with 4 bar girls, got one coming round for *coffee* later today.

[Bullie]

28 minutes ago, Kwasaki said:

His fallen in luv so why are you concerned. 

So you yourself never care when you receive threatening phone calls. I admire your nerves, good sir.

[Bullie]

15 minutes ago, thaibeachlovers said:

Any rich or famous guy will find himself with offers from women that wouldn't look at him sideways if he wasn't rich or famous. How many girls would Jagger have scored with if he was Mick the garbage man?

Which underlines the point I was making. Jagger might be the exception to the rule, what with that rather generous mouth he has. Could well prove to be useful in the oral department. Or is that thinking too much like a man?

[NoshowJones]

9 hours ago, madmen said:

What happened to newbies first few posts being simple questions like how much is a rub n tug or where is the cheapest beer in pattaya. So much drama coming from newbs 

Newbies are perfectly entitled to come on here and start topics, no matter how many times that same topic has been on before, as long as the topics are within Thaivisa rules of course.

I for one are happy to read and answer the same topics that have already been covered before, there are always different answers, opinions and experiences all the time.

As for ones like the cheapest beer, and the prices of rub and tub, I don't usually even start to read them, though other TV members will.

If you are bored with a certain topic, just move on instead of complaining about it.

[NoshowJones]

6 hours ago, Isaanbiker said:

I fully agree! But when you get married to one, it's a very painful business transaction.  

There are exceptions, one of my friends has been married to an ex bargirl for nearly thirty years, and from what I can see they are still happy together.

[NoshowJones]

3 hours ago, SenorJorge said:

 

The bar girl.  The world's oldest profession.

Really? When did the worlds first ever bar open?????

[holy cow cm]

Yeah, lots of men folk come here and lose their brains becoming overly enamored with the bar chicks. Lots of fun in it but going overboard is a tough price to pay if the girl is yanking him on like this one is. For the OP, the guy in the UK probably used his line phone calling device and does not have his actual phone number.

 

Everyone learns their lessons sooner or later and it is the price we pay for the bar girl play.

[brewsterbudgen]

Anyone in a "relationship" with a working bargirl is a fool if they get upset about her doing her job! 

[BritManToo]

45 minutes ago, thaibeachlovers said:

I don't know why she changed, but that will perplex me till my dying day.

You probably didn't pay her enough or handed her your balls.

Women don't like either.

[brewsterbudgen]

15 minutes ago, possum1931 said:

There are exceptions, one of my friends has been married to an ex bargirl for nearly thirty years, and from what I can see they are still happy together.

Marrying an ex-bargirl is very different from "dating" a working bargirl, which is what is described in the OP.

[NoshowJones]

57 minutes ago, thaibeachlovers said:

Any rich or famous guy will find himself with offers from women that wouldn't look at him sideways if he wasn't rich or famous. How many girls would Jagger have scored with if he was Mick the garbage man?

Exactly. Rod Stewart, same, same.

[NoshowJones]

9 minutes ago, brewsterbudgen said:

Marrying an ex-bargirl is very different from "dating" a working bargirl, which is what is described in the OP.

No, I should have said, she was a bargirl when they met.

[yogi100]

52 minutes ago, Bullie said:

So you yourself never care when you receive threatening phone calls. I admire your nerves, good sir.

There's no point in worrying about it if it's another falang cos you're hardly ever likely to meet unless the tart concerned is totally dim.

 

The time to be concerned is when you're in Thailand, you answer the phone and a Thai man says in a calm voice. 

 

"Lady you, wife me".

 

 

[brewsterbudgen]

8 minutes ago, possum1931 said:

No, I should have said, she was a bargirl when they met.

Yeah, I agree with you there.  I met my wife in a gogo and 5 years later (and one kid) we're doing fine.  I would think it's very common to meet a future girlfriend/wife in a bar, but if they don't quit the work it's unlikely to last.

[dotpoom]

Not sure I understand the OP...

 His opening line starts off.. "this has never happened to me"...and then goes on to tell how he got a threatening phone call?

[thaibeachlovers]

1 hour ago, Bullie said:

Which underlines the point I was making. Jagger might be the exception to the rule, what with that rather generous mouth he has. Could well prove to be useful in the oral department. Or is that thinking too much like a man?

Yes.