11 hours ago, rimmae2 said:

I guess from the type of comments that most posters would not know that there are financially independent, respected, dynamic, well educated and travelled....etc, Thai women with their own careers in Thailand (married and single (including many under 40)).  I know CEOs/MDs/pilots, entrepeneurs, dentists, etc, some friends of my wife and others I have met though business, travel, etc.

And are they single because they want to be single or because they cause headache?

IMHO there is often a good reason why those who are alone at that age are alone.

21 hours ago, OneMoreFarang said:

And are they single because they want to be single or because they cause headache?

IMHO there is often a good reason why those who are alone at that age are alone.

Would that also be applicable to the male singles

2 hours ago, 473geo said:

Would that also be applicable to the male singles

Maybe. I was never interested in males - single or not.

5 hours ago, OneMoreFarang said:

Maybe. I was never interested in males - single or not.

As with many who appear to suggest relationships are not successful due to the limitations in the Thai female 

On 12/17/2020 at 12:57 PM, pgrahmm said:

Amen....

I'm married to one....

 

Thailand is full of vibrant, capable, traditional, successful, hard working, educated women....

 

The OP cited Pattaya, and odds are slim to none there.... It's a playground for the "at risk" crowd....

 

Actually no, I know that kind of woman in Pattaya too. It comes down to the circles you frequent.

3 minutes ago, Eindhoven said:

 

Actually no, I know that kind of woman in Pattaya too. It comes down to the circles you frequent.

And the qualities available to attract

1 minute ago, 473geo said:

And the qualities available to attract

 

I try to not be too judgemental about the guys and gals in Pattaya and beyond. But I also don't involve myself with them.

42 minutes ago, 473geo said:

As with many who appear to suggest relationships are not successful due to the limitations in the Thai female 

I would call it incompatibility.

That's one reason why lots of guys from "the west" are here. Because they are not compatible with most women back home.

Obviously those feminists can behave the way they want. But they shouldn't be surprised if lots of guys are not interested.

And the other was around. Lot's of females don't like the way many males behave. They are incompatible.

With many Thai bar girls and western guys there seem to be some compatibility. 

20 minutes ago, 473geo said:

And the qualities available to attract

like having a lot of money?

5 minutes ago, OneMoreFarang said:

like having a lot of money?

Not always necessary, although if you don't have at least a little money to entertain in the initial stages, you are gonna need more than a few alternative attributes

3 hours ago, 473geo said:

Not always necessary, although if you don't have at least a little money to entertain in the initial stages, you are gonna need more than a few alternative attributes

I don't have a link but some time ago someone published some YouTube videos here from Thai women who had enough money themselves. And the questions came up what they would expect from a long term boyfriend, possible husband. As far as I remember all but one of them thought the boyfriend should always pay when they go out together. The women could afford it but it seems it was fixed in their mind that that's the way it is. He pays!

17 minutes ago, OneMoreFarang said:

I don't have a link but some time ago someone published some YouTube videos here from Thai women who had enough money themselves. And the questions came up what they would expect from a long term boyfriend, possible husband. As far as I remember all but one of them thought the boyfriend should always pay when they go out together. The women could afford it but it seems it was fixed in their mind that that's the way it is. He pays!

Hierarchical society, May well be expected of these successful women, when they return home, to pay for a family meal and gifts. Something I see happen, and they actually enjoy

On 12/16/2020 at 8:15 PM, Dumbastheycome said:

Having read the  comments  thus  far I am very happy to say I have  maintained avoidance  of significant  social contact  with the majority of  westerners  in Thailand.

There are clearly those  here in Thailand  who have "found " caring and amicable relationships that have  lasted at least some test of  time and I congratulate them.

There are those  that have suffered  various degrees of  disappointment due to various reason which many if not  most  would prefer to attribute to anyone  but themselves.

There are those  that either deliberately or accidentally came to continue an inherent crass selfish desire easily  catered to.

Each to their own. I think not a  difficult  guess as to who is  happiest.

 

A thanks icon is not enough for your post. You made some cogent points. 

 

The Farang I've met who found a solid and lasting relationship with a Thai woman did so because they knew what they needed (and often what they wanted as well), looked for it honestly and seriously, and had the self-knowledge to recognize it and act on it when they found it. 

 

The ones that failed did so because they wanted irreconcilable things and had unrealistic expectations. Some wanted a steady compatible partner when they wanted it and to be aloof and alone when they wanted that. A stable relationship doesn't work that way. You put up with things you don't like because what you get for your forbearance is worth far more to you. Each partner must be there for themselves and for the other for a shared reward. 

 

A few of them are just losers who thought that by coming to Thailand they would instantly morph into winners and find a gorgeous mirror-image female winner with minimal effort or sacrifice and without any effort at self-improvement. They are still looking. 

 

I agree that Thai women are generally happy with traditional roles and much less concerned with age differences than their western counterparts. I disagree that they are all grasping and deceitful, interested only in what they can extract from a man before moving on. What all women and men want from a partner is care, compassion, loyalty, honesty, and moral support through life's vissicitudes. Lump those together and call it love; as good a definition as any. 

On 12/16/2020 at 9:46 PM, madmen said:

But she can hardly put a sentence together. "what you want eat Hon" would be about it. 

 

That's what kills the experience. The rest of your stuff can be bought for peanuts. 

 

Guys all of these types of threads end up with everybody being deliriously happy with their partner. 

 

I'm not buying it but I got a lot of friends trapped and it's not pretty. 

So your conclusion is that nobody can have a meaningful relationship based on mutual respect and care, or even that elusive thing called love? In my opinion you must widen your circle of acquaintances somewhat. 

 

People can communicate in many ways, spoken word being one of the weakest, easiest manipulated, and least trustworthy. Quiz: what is the key word in this phrase--"what you want eat Hon". Answer: Hon. 

 

Fortunately many of us are quite happy with our Thai women entirely without you "buying it" at all. If you choose your grapes more carefully they won't all be so sour. 

From The Rose: "It's the one who can't be taken who cannot seem to give". 

 

If your friends have two legs they are not trapped. Maybe what they lack is two bคเเร. 

On 12/16/2020 at 10:37 PM, Leaver said:

Most are now financially trapped, therefore, have to believe their girl is different, and the love is real.

 

Social experiment.  Stop the monthly money and see how much love you get.  ????

 

These are the same guys that frown upon the mongers here.  Yet, not much different between a Thai women who has a couple of short time customers a week and a few lady drinks for around 10k baht a month, or a Thai women who has one exclusive customer, called her husband, for the same money, if not more.     

My condolences for your loss. 

Many of the most valuable things in life are fragile and cynacism is a blunt instrument. 

my wife truly loves my bank account. i am somewhere down the list of important things. 

53 minutes ago, mr mr said:

my wife truly loves my bank account. i am somewhere down the list of important things. 

I have discovered where I am in the list..just one below the dog.

And its a nasty dog.

On 12/17/2020 at 8:19 PM, murraynz said:

Same same.

Ive been married and him kids in previuos life.

In thailand there is very ample female company available,without the need to get married.and all the problems that go with it..

Having variety is invaluable..

 

 

But no one to care for u .

What happens if U need care?

I am surprised nobody suggest multiple wives and/or  loves.

Why? 

8 minutes ago, olfu said:

I am surprised nobody suggest multiple wives and/or  loves.

Why? 

 

you ever know a happily married man ? it's like a unicorn that shoots rainbows from it's ars......... 

3 minutes ago, mr mr said:

 

you ever know a happily married man ? it's like a unicorn that shoots rainbows from it's ars......... 

No, but possibly they around and should tell us what we missing.

On 12/19/2020 at 4:47 PM, RocketDog said:

My condolences for your loss. 

Many of the most valuable things in life are fragile and cynacism is a blunt instrument. 

No loss here.

 

Never had a Thai girlfriend, let alone a wife.  Rent a property.  Never owned a business here.  Never sent money for a sick buffalo.  Keep my assets in my home country and only transfer over living expenses.  All of these are by choice.  

 

Soooooooo many guys who have done otherwise have lost their life savings and gone home broke and onto benefits, when they should be enjoying their twilight years here in the sun.  

On 12/19/2020 at 10:46 PM, georgegeorgia said:

But no one to care for u .

What happens if U need care?

When the time comes for needing care, simply pay one of your gf's to be your carer ...with some of the money you've saved by being single.

For me, Covid changed everything. Prior to the pandemic, I was single and I pretty-much enjoyed it. At the time of the lockdown, I decided to try the "relationship thing" with a beautiful, hard-working lady who owns her own retail business. She has taken great care of me these past few months and I have been there to support her when her business has been slow. I cannot predict the future but I have not regretted my decision once. I am grateful to have had a like-minded woman in my life while riding out this global pandemic. She has been a blessing to me.

On 12/21/2020 at 5:14 PM, YITB1980 said:

She has taken great care of me these past few months

 

On 12/21/2020 at 5:14 PM, YITB1980 said:

I have been there to support her when her business has been slow.

 

One takes money, and the other takes........................................

2 hours ago, Leaver said:

 

 

One takes money, and the other takes........................................

Scrape scrape....is that you down there in the bottom of that barrel Leaver ????

12 hours ago, Leaver said:

 

 

One takes money, and the other takes......FRIED RICE...............................

 

On 12/21/2020 at 5:14 PM, YITB1980 said:

For me, Covid changed everything. Prior to the pandemic, I was single and I pretty-much enjoyed it. At the time of the lockdown, I decided to try the "relationship thing" with a beautiful, hard-working lady who owns her own retail business. She has taken great care of me these past few months and I have been there to support her when her business has been slow. I cannot predict the future but I have not regretted my decision once. I am grateful to have had a like-minded woman in my life while riding out this global pandemic. She has been a blessing to me.

 

  Dont get too loved up , her attitude may change once her business picks up 

On 12/19/2020 at 6:46 AM, georgegeorgia said:

But no one to care for u .

What happens if U need care?

Yes.

Thailand is not a place to be sick or to need help if you are alone. more difficult if you  do not speak or understand Thai.  Having a bad partner is not good no matter where you are, but at least in Europe or Australia, the bank manager does not help wife steal your money.

 

OF course you can find real love here ,at first i found love of a kind ,more a friendship ,still friends almost 30 yrs later ,but i found real love when i had business in BKK ,and met my wife ,all these years later ,after living here and in the UK we still love each other to bits as do my Thai family love me and my English family love my Thai family ,(those they have met anyway) and my daughter calls our son her little brother ,mind you he is an adult now , 

I was not well recently and the care my wife and son gave me was fantastic .