On 6/21/2024 at 10:57 AM, SAFETY FIRST said:

Same here. 😂

 

She took my BP And pulse for some reason they were both dangerously high

7 minutes ago, kingstonkid said:

She took my BP And pulse for some reason they were both dangerously high

 

   Maybe because you got sexually aroused ?

On 6/22/2024 at 2:04 AM, jjstephen said:

 

I know it sounds a bit ridiculous when I write it like that, but when you find true love the distance is not a barrier. Although we have not met yet, I am literally talking to her constantly, all day every day sending messages. I spend more time talking to her than if we lived together and were both working. I feel that I know her quite well at this stage. In November I will visit her bar and ask the other women if she ever did bar fines or not.

Better idea go to bR but don't tell her who you are.  See if she recognize you

  If not buy her a couple of drinks pretend you don't know her and see.

 

I find it interesting that you are going to Pattaya to meet her.  Surprised you are not meeting her in bkk

 If she works at BKK hospital she should be able to meet you at swampy.

 

Consider that Nother red light.

 

Also top tier hospitals pay well and would fire anyone working in a bar.

18 minutes ago, Nick Carter icp said:

 

   Maybe because you got sexually aroused ?

Ya think 😂

11 hours ago, robertyongym said:

You can take the girl our of the bar but you can't take the bar out of the girl.

Well done, did you make that up all by yourself?

In all my years on visiting working and living in Thailand and dating a few Bangkok nurses in my past, I have never heard of a nurse in a Bangkok hospital working weekends in a Pattaya bar or any other bar. Why would she not work in a Bangkok bar closer to home and her job, not that I believe the story. Tell her you will meet her at the hospital and ask where she works. I would wager the closest she has ever got to a nurse is having her monthly STD test. I was unaware that there were people so naive about Thailand. Anyone who has naively got engaged to a woman they have never met will not listen to posters for advice that disagrees with their narrative.

Any reasonably experience expat living here will tell you to drop her like a hot potato. Many have learnt the hard way so listen up. Of course that is not the advice you want to hear so I will look forward to your story in a year or two of how you lost all your money on a bar girl who has now left you for the next sucker.

There is a reason why they say in Pattaya you never lose your girlfriend, you just lose your turn.

On 6/21/2024 at 6:37 AM, jjstephen said:

I met my Thai fiancé on a dating site around 19 months ago. We started chatting all day every day and things got pretty serious. We are now engaged and will get married after we meet in person for the first time, I am planning to visit Bangkok in November and tie the knot.

 

 

My fiancé is a nurse and works at a major hospital in Bangkok (which I will not name for obvious reasons). Around 6 months into our relationship she started working part time at a bar in Pattaya.

On the weekends she will go down to Pattaya to work in the bar and then return back to the hospital on Monday morning. She is doing this, working 7 days a week, to help pay off her student loans.

As I have never visited Thailand before, I started to read about Thai culture online to prepare myself. I found many posts online (for example this) which say that bar girls are 'working' and not really relationship material. But I feel like my fiancé is different as even one of the senior doctors at her hospital is involved in running the bar that she works at.

 

I confronted my fiancé and she assured me that she only earns money from tips and drinks in the bar. Two weeks ago a Canadian guy asked to take her out of the bar. She refused him and said that she felt scared and embarrassed by it.

 

Basically my question is this: Is it true that all bar girls are 'working' and going to customer's hotel rooms (even women that work there part time)? Or is she is really telling the truth here and should be trusted? Is the information posted online true or is it false? She has never asked me for money before but she did say that in November I will need to pay the hospital for her to have time off work as she already used her annual leave when her brother was sick.

 

I am also looking for advice about where to stay in Pattaya? Where is a reasonably priced hotel and what is the best place on the island to stay?

 

Thanks in advance.

Stay with her and accompany her in Pattaya....

It will open your eyes and mind.

And then...look for a real one, not a bar girl.

The good thing about a Nurse Bar Girl are all the different roles: Enema Mistress, speculums, prostate massage, haemmeroid tickling....

 

What Bar is she at?

On 6/29/2024 at 2:22 PM, NativeBob said:

student loan in Thailand? what a BS!

Huh? Most students who attend uni in Thailand end up having to repay a government loan over many years.

Just be a man and pay the loan off so she does not have to prostitute herself. 

How old is this nurse/bar girl? 

On 6/29/2024 at 2:22 PM, NativeBob said:

student loan in Thailand? what a BS!

https://www.nationthailand.com/thailand/general/40036841

 

 currently the Student Loan Fund  has over 3.5 million active borrowers who owe some 454.64 billion baht. The fund also has over 5.3 million past borrowers 

Hello, You may stay at Nirun on Soi Arunatai. The Big C is walkable and they have a great food court (bring your own bottle for the free water machine).

She's a part time bar cashier whose lips are moving...of course you will believe her...you're both in love,

  right?

On 6/29/2024 at 7:29 AM, kingstonkid said:

On 6/29/2024 at 7:10 AM, Nick Carter icp said:

 

   Maybe because you got sexually aroused ?

Ya think 😂

 

so still really only 2 things up then. she totally missed the little 3rd one.

On 7/14/2024 at 8:19 PM, Hugh Cow said:

 

There is a reason why they say in Pattaya you never lose your girlfriend, you just lose your turn.

I'm intrigued and curious...why is that said?

8 minutes ago, wombat said:

I'm intrigued and curious...why is that said?

 

ok so. one time at band camp. 

On 6/21/2024 at 2:06 PM, pomchop said:

Sorry but the best advice you are likely to get and no doubt ignore is do not marry a girl you have never even met, do not believe everything someone you have never met tells you and forget about coming to a place like pattaya that you quite obviously know little to nothing about if you think it is an island...don't mean this in a bad way but wow you are a train wreck waiting to happen.

Just look back on a story posted on this site a few days ago. I don’t have a link but the story line was very similar to yours. The guys name was Ahmet and he had never met his Thai girlfriend before. Bottom line is that his online romance and commitment to marriage cost him 380,000 baht. 
Be afwaid, be very very afwaid as Elmer Fudd would say. 
 

Found the link

 

https://aseannow.com/topic/1337385-swedish-man-scammed-by-thai-woman-loses-over-300000-baht/page/2/

She was marrying this plonker last week 

On 6/21/2024 at 6:37 AM, jjstephen said:

My fiancé is a nurse and works at a major hospital in Bangkok (which I will not name for obvious reasons). Around 6 months into our relationship she started working part time at a bar in Pattaya.

Sure, she qualified as a nurse, works in a large hospital in Bangkok  and works part time in a bar in Pattaya.

 

Must try harder.

Another one bites the dust.

 

If any single part of the OPs post is true, which I doubt, it beggars belief in this day and age.

So a nurse that works five days a week spend the weekend in the bars working and you’re asking people if she’s marriage material TIT

Hahahaha. Man you gotta wake up.

No, follow your penis wherever it leads you. Sure, that might be tied up in a hot tin shed and "encouraged" to disclose your pin number, but dang it!

Love is about taking chances, and mysterious nurse/bar girls from Thailand. 

 

 

 

 

 

Come on man, even the backstory you gave her was lazy writing, if you're gonna troll show some effort.

_teehee

 

On 6/21/2024 at 6:37 AM, jjstephen said:

Basically my question is this: Is it true that all bar girls are 'working' and going to customer's hotel rooms (even women that work there part time)?

Yes, unfortunately it is true. She also may have not been lying about refusing the Canadian and feeling scared. Bar girls pick and choose who they go home with for paid sex. No matter what she says though, she is selling herself and sex. A bar worker makes very little money even working full time (12 hours a day). They make their money mostly on drinks and sex. Drinks will pay her up to 50 baht each drink. Sex will make her over 1000 for a quickie and more if she is young and cute. Either way, you can pretty much guarantee that she will accept an offer to some younger man who she thinks is cute and is offering her money for sex. In her eyes, you will never be able to learn the truth and she is justified with her story she told you about repaying her loans. 

 

On 6/22/2024 at 2:04 AM, jjstephen said:

 

I know it sounds a bit ridiculous when I write it like that, but when you find true love the distance is not a barrier. Although we have not met yet, I am literally talking to her constantly, all day every day sending messages. I spend more time talking to her than if we lived together and were both working. I feel that I know her quite well at this stage. In November I will visit her bar and ask the other women if she ever did bar fines or not.

This would be a waste of time. Her bar friend are all in cahoots together and will of course say no. 

If you really want to know for sure, have some foreigner friends there go to the bar and watch her, or you come earlier than she knows and you watch her from afar or from another bar. There are also Private companies that can do this for you. Either way, she has chosen to use loans and other excuses to go to the best city for buying sex and taken a job at a bar which is the best place for finding a girl to pay for sex. I find it hard to believe that you are even still talking to her if you were thinking she was a good girl. Especially, i find it hard to believe that you questions all the reports seen online about the women who work the bars in Pattaya. 

You should make a decision about if this is the type of woman you really want. You have only had online relations with her. You still have a chance to find a good woman who would never consider working as a bar girl in Pattaya. 

By the way, almost all doctors have a private office where they employ nurses that they know. For a doctor to even suggest she go to work as a bar girl leaves something to be curious about. There are lots of jobs or perhaps even better hospitals that would give more work or pay more in Bangkok that she could do rather than being a bar girl. 

 

One final note, I can not say for sure your woman has already succumbed to selling herself to the customer. But rest assured, she will. The temptation followed by the heavy drinking will make her do so eventually. 

Lots of red flags here. You seem to be very gulible getting engaged to someone you have never met from a country you havn't visited andhat's just for starters! 

On 6/21/2024 at 6:37 AM, jjstephen said:

I am also looking for advice about where to stay in Pattaya? Where is a reasonably priced hotel and what is the best place on the island to stay?

Here is my advice: Pattaya is not on an island.

1. You never met her. Cancel the wedding tomorrow. Tell her you have have come to your senses, and decided you need to meet her, and get to know her first. 

 

2. Give it at least 2-4 years, together ful time, before you propose. Time is ALWAYS our ally, and never theirs. The vast majority of Thai people are way immature for their age. And many women and men are emotionally undeveloped, and really just 13 year olds, who look like adults. So take you time, get to know who they really are. Take as much time as you need. If it's good it's only going to get better, and if there are problems, they are going to manifest themselves over time. 

You have NO idea what she's made of, you have no idea how good a job her family did raising her, you have no idea what her underlying neurosis or baggage is, until at least 12- 24months into the relationship. Together, not online. The longer, the better. If she walks, let her walk.

 

3. See if you like her family. It is far harder to have a successful relationship here if you don't. 

 

4. So take you time, get to know who they really are, and how they act under duress. So take you time, get to know who they really are, and how they act under different sorts of circumstances, and how they act when they do not get their way. LOL.

 

5. You have already broken rule number one and two. You made a commitment without meeting her and getting to know her. And you spent too much time chatting with someone you never met. It is not too late. But, you must change your plans, and the sooner, the better. 

 

6. Do not trust the bar story. You don't know her and you have no way to know if you can trust her. Assume the worst. 

On 6/21/2024 at 6:37 AM, jjstephen said:

We are now engaged and will get married after we meet in person for the first time, I am planning to visit Bangkok in November and tie the knot.

Are you crazy ... need to know her , and her family before getting engaged into something that could easily become a nightmare for you .

On 6/22/2024 at 2:04 AM, jjstephen said:

 

I know it sounds a bit ridiculous when I write it like that, but when you find true love the distance is not a barrier. Although we have not met yet, I am literally talking to her constantly, all day every day sending messages. I spend more time talking to her than if we lived together and were both working. I feel that I know her quite well at this stage. In November I will visit her bar and ask the other women if she ever did bar fines or not.

No point asking her friends, you need someone on this chatgroup that you can trust.  Send me a PM with the name of the bar and a way to identify your girl and I'll go there to chat her up and try to bar fine her.  Obviously, you will need to send me some money to do that.  If she says no to me, she is probably a keeper.