21 hours ago, Jack1988 said:

I often see this thing when i am in thailand. I am talking about thai couples, married or just boyfriend and girlfriend. Why is always the thai women that pays and not the thai man? I read some thai stories online, the thai husband gets a salary but he must give it all to his wife, so she pay everything but with his husband's money 🤨😆. I feel like: you gotta be kidding me lol

it's an asian thing, Chinese, Vietnamese are the same, my wife takes or I gave her my wallet to pay, it makes her feel special

19 hours ago, Jack1988 said:

yes but with the man's money

ohhh boy, you must be new here, in case you didn't know/notice,  here we are called walking ATM machines   555

1 minute ago, Mavideol said:

it's an asian thing, Chinese, Vietnamese are the same, my wife takes or I gave her my wallet to pay, it makes her feel special

Maybe true - Wife always deals with the bills… I can’t be bothered…

She also drives mostly these days… I can’t be bothered with that either… 

 

We have the same account / card - so it doesn’t matter who makes the transaction- it comes from the same account. 
 

If she’s busy chatting, I’ll get the bill, if I’m busy, she’ll get it - the action of who executes the transaction itself matters little to us from a financial perspective - it’s usually her though, ‘cos I’m taking with my son or friends etc & the wives will just sort it out. 
 

I’ve never given it a second thought. 

I'm sorry if someone didn't like my attitude but I respect everyone's life. It's just that I couldn't handle with a marriage life, it's not for me honestly. Marriage is a contract and in Thailand is not easy at all, because of diversity and the culture. I've not the mindset for all this. I prefer being single, maybe just a girlfriend if it happens but nothing more

3 minutes ago, Mavideol said:

19 hours ago, Jack1988 said:

yes but with the man's money

ohhh boy, you must be new here, in case you didn't know/notice,  here we are called walking ATM machines   555

On that perspective…

- Driver (child to & from school)

- Cook (excellent food)

- Does all the grocery shopping

- Given up a good career (after child)

- lots more that I forget….

 

Whats ours is ours for very good reasons - a trusted life partner who’s sacrificed a lot…. Some of the comments don’t see things firing that perspective because they may not have been in the same situation…

… but it’s also clear many are in mutually caring, mutually respectful & loving relationships who do get the ‘sharing concept’…

 

Without my wife, my life would be a lot more expensive - child care alone…

 

Yeah I see this a lot too, and a lot of my friends don't carry cash, their wife carries cash or she puts everything on a card. I don't get it, it's never been my style. I've always liked to carry a lot of cash, my woman has access to some money but she doesn't control our accounts. It's really up to the man if he wants to surrender all of his masculinity and his dignity that's on him, but I'm in your camp. The man's camp. I don't understand it, and I don't know why a man would want to do that. 

 

One of the things I have noticed over the years is that somebody has to be in control of the ship, in this particular case a relationship. If the man's not willing to assume control, then the woman is forced into that position by his lack of cojones and masculinity. So that might be a factor, but I'm just speculating. I don't get the impression that that's required here, where in a lot of relationships in the West it does seem to be required. I know a lot of guys that are required to check their cojones at the door and they have no control over the finances back there. It is a sad thing to witness. No thanks. 

 

 

1 hour ago, Liverpool Lou said:

Why is spending one's own money being a "selfish bastard"?

 

 

I didn't say it was.

 

Up to your usual trick of putting words in people's mouths........trot on!

9 minutes ago, richard_smith237 said:

On that perspective…

- Driver (child to & from school)

- Cook (excellent food)

- Does all the grocery shopping

- Given up a good career (after child)

- lots more that I forget….

 

Whats ours is ours for very good reasons - a trusted life partner who’s sacrificed a lot…. Some of the comments don’t see things firing that perspective because they may not have been in the same situation…

… but it’s also clear many are in mutually caring, mutually respectful & loving relationships who do get the ‘sharing concept’…

 

Without my wife, my life would be a lot more expensive - child care alone…

 

am with you as I got a winner as well

12 minutes ago, spidermike007 said:

Yeah I see this a lot too, and a lot of my friends don't carry cash, their wife carries cash or she puts everything on a card. I don't get it, it's never been my style. I've always liked to carry a lot of cash, my woman has access to some money but she doesn't control our accounts. It's really up to the man if he wants to surrender all of his masculinity and his dignity that's on him, but I'm in your camp. The man's camp. I don't understand it, and I don't know why a man would want to do that. 

 

One of the things I have noticed over the years is that somebody has to be in control of the ship, in this particular case a relationship. If the man's not willing to assume control, then the woman is forced into that position by his lack of cojones and masculinity. So that might be a factor, but I'm just speculating. I don't get the impression that that's required here, where in a lot of relationships in the West it does seem to be required. I know a lot of guys that are required to check their cojones at the door and they have no control over the finances back there. It is a sad thing to witness. No thanks. 

 

 

Surprising comments from you…

I thought you’d be more open minded to varying dynamics in relationships, why & how they work etc…

 

No hard rules - some just work with a better simplicity & balance than others it seems.

21 hours ago, bkk6060 said:

I see a lot of expats gf or wife paying.

Obviously, they are giving the lady the money to pay probably due to their stupidity, financial incompetence or inability to add.  The same guys that brag their spouses handle all the financial management in their household which to me is the ultimate weak simp embarrassment.

What a tosser as we say back home - get a GF and stop playing with it. 

The wife pays because she can get a discount without offending. 

Plus I am too lazy to bother.  

1 hour ago, richard_smith237 said:

On that perspective…

- Driver (child to & from school)

- Cook (excellent food)

- Does all the grocery shopping

- Given up a good career (after child)

- lots more that I forget….

 

Whats ours is ours for very good reasons - a trusted life partner who’s sacrificed a lot…. Some of the comments don’t see things firing that perspective because they may not have been in the same situation…

… but it’s also clear many are in mutually caring, mutually respectful & loving relationships who do get the ‘sharing concept’…

 

Without my wife, my life would be a lot more expensive - child care alone…

 

my life isn't expensive at all, as i am happily single and i don't have children

ok your thai wife does all these things but for a big price

2 hours ago, Jack1988 said:

I'm single and I don't have children 

I can fully understand why.

1 minute ago, Jack1988 said:

my life isn't expensive at all, as i am happily single and i don't have children

ok your thai wife does all these things but for a big price

We have quite different situations - what you see as a huge price…. I see as phenomenal reward… 

 

Many wives have given up & compromised their careers more than many husbands care to admit. 

My Wife’s devotion to myself & our family by far supersedes any savings I’d make by being single.

 

 

 

1 hour ago, spidermike007 said:

Yeah I see this a lot too, and a lot of my friends don't carry cash, their wife carries cash or she puts everything on a card. I don't get it, it's never been my style. I've always liked to carry a lot of cash, my woman has access to some money but she doesn't control our accounts. It's really up to the man if he wants to surrender all of his masculinity and his dignity that's on him, but I'm in your camp. The man's camp. I don't understand it, and I don't know why a man would want to do that. 

 

One of the things I have noticed over the years is that somebody has to be in control of the ship, in this particular case a relationship. If the man's not willing to assume control, then the woman is forced into that position by his lack of cojones and masculinity. So that might be a factor, but I'm just speculating. I don't get the impression that that's required here, where in a lot of relationships in the West it does seem to be required. I know a lot of guys that are required to check their cojones at the door and they have no control over the finances back there. It is a sad thing to witness. No thanks. 

 

 

Useally agree with you, but if that's what is needed for you to feel like a man, I can't argue against you, but politely disagree.

 

 

thai women will always put you last. You are only a farang here ( walking atm) nothing more

The ladies are smart because if they don't take over the monthly wage comming in, strong chances that the Thai husband will squander it all on booze and hookers. 

 

With a falang man , it goes the other way round. The falang had better hold on to his cash and bank details and avoid having to maintain the entire family of the Thai lady. There are always the aged parents. But the most trouble comes from the worthless brother or cousin loafer who always will be out to get his cut of the falang money. 

1 hour ago, richard_smith237 said:

1 hour ago, spidermike007 said:

Yeah I see this a lot too, and a lot of my friends don't carry cash, their wife carries cash or she puts everything on a card. I don't get it, it's never been my style. I've always liked to carry a lot of cash, my woman has access to some money but she doesn't control our accounts. It's really up to the man if he wants to surrender all of his masculinity and his dignity that's on him, but I'm in your camp. The man's camp. I don't understand it, and I don't know why a man would want to do that. 

 

One of the things I have noticed over the years is that somebody has to be in control of the ship, in this particular case a relationship. If the man's not willing to assume control, then the woman is forced into that position by his lack of cojones and masculinity. So that might be a factor, but I'm just speculating. I don't get the impression that that's required here, where in a lot of relationships in the West it does seem to be required. I know a lot of guys that are required to check their cojones at the door and they have no control over the finances back there. It is a sad thing to witness. No thanks. 

 

 

Expand  

Surprising comments from you…

I thought you’d be more open minded to varying dynamics in relationships, why & how they work etc…

 

Exactly what I was about to write.  He normally seems fairly smart and open to most Thai cultural norms and traditions.

 

If it works, everyone is happy, and it's the norm in the country you are in, why the need to avoid something just to prove how much of a "man" you are?

 

I guess even someone who generally comes across as intelligent can still be a slave to their upbringing.

1 hour ago, Hummin said:

Useally agree with you, but if that's what is needed for you to feel like a man, I can't argue against you, but politely disagree.

 

 

That certainly not what's needed for me to feel like a man, but my woman and I enjoy role playing and she enjoys manifesting the dignity within femininity, and I enjoy playing the role of the provider, so it comes naturally for me to pay for stuff, that combined with the fact that I love carrying cash, it's just a very natural role for us. 

1 hour ago, BangkokReady said:

 

Exactly what I was about to write.  He normally seems fairly smart and open to most Thai cultural norms and traditions.

 

If it works, everyone is happy, and it's the norm in the country you are in, why the need to avoid something just to prove how much of a "man" you are?

 

I guess even someone who generally comes across as intelligent can still be a slave to their upbringing.

It's actually the polar opposite of being a slave to my upbringing, my upbringing dictates that the woman's in control because that's just how things work in America. The man is allowed to assume more control here, to whatever degree he wishes. 

1 minute ago, spidermike007 said:

That certainly not what's needed for me to feel like a man, but my woman and I enjoy role playing and she enjoys manifesting the dignity

 

Does she call you Peg ????

 

 

 

well, i think that 95% of folks on this forum is married to a thai woman. If you are happy to being a slave, then i am happy for you

8 minutes ago, Jack1988 said:

well, i think that 95% of folks on this forum is married to a thai woman. If you are happy to being a slave, then i am happy for you

You sound like a very sad, bitter, and lonely old man. 

6 minutes ago, ThreeCardMonte said:

Today for breakfast I had the American at Cafe Pitni.

 

Eggs scrambled, extra bacon and Cappuccino.

and goodbye liver

On 6/17/2025 at 9:21 PM, bkk6060 said:

I see a lot of expats gf or wife paying.

Obviously, they are giving the lady the money to pay probably due to their stupidity, financial incompetence or inability to add.  The same guys that brag their spouses handle all the financial management in their household which to me is the ultimate weak simp embarrassment.

Or their desire to have a stress free shopping trip....

11 hours ago, Jack1988 said:

well, i think that 95% of folks on this forum is married to a thai woman. If you are happy to being a slave, then i am happy for you

I think 95% of folks on this forum are not married to Thai woman, or even in a relationship, or in Th at all, or been to TH in years, pre scamdemic or longer.

 

Those that do visit TH are disfunction with women in their home country, and only way for them to have sex is P4P, and can't afford it in home country.

 

...  IMHO

 

Nothing wrong with that, but not a life I would want to live.

On 6/17/2025 at 8:31 PM, Jack1988 said:

I often see this thing when i am in thailand. I am talking about thai couples, married or just boyfriend and girlfriend. Why is always the thai women that pays and not the thai man? I read some thai stories online, the thai husband gets a salary but he must give it all to his wife, so she pay everything but with his husband's money 🤨😆. I feel like: you gotta be kidding me lol

Because we can. 

"""its not my money, simply because it goes to my bank account first.  It's 'our' money.  Same as 'our' house........and etc"""

 

I give my Thai wife 5000bt personal spending money monthly. 

 

When paying cash ( taxi, grocery, stores and etc) I hand the cash to her - she speaks Thai 100% so if any problems, she take care of them - 90% of the time she hands back the change if any.  Works for me!

On 6/17/2025 at 8:36 PM, hotandsticky said:

You obviously didn't live in a north England town 80 years ago.

 

 

It was the norm for the husband to hand over his weekly pay packet. The wife would hand a small amount back so he could go out for a beer.

This happens in Japan as well

On 6/17/2025 at 9:04 PM, Jeff the Chef said:

 

It was the same in North London where I grew up 65 years ago, the "old man" dropped his pay packet on the kitchen table and Mum sorted out the family finances.

Same around the world smart wives used to do this.

12 hours ago, spidermike007 said:

That certainly not what's needed for me to feel like a man, but my woman and I enjoy role playing and she enjoys manifesting the dignity within femininity, and I enjoy playing the role of the provider, so it comes naturally for me to pay for stuff, that combined with the fact that I love carrying cash, it's just a very natural role for us. 

 

It is a difference when you have a household, animals, cooking home and a small farm. 

 

I can't be bothered to go with wife everywhere to pay bills, shopping and dealing with everything I do not need to do.

 

I literally hate shopping, but when I go, I know what I need, and there is one loop, finding what we gonna have, and out. 

 

Going with wife? Every carrot carefully inspected, looking, checking prices, and zzzzzzzzz 

 

Shopping clothes? I walk past something that looks OK, I grab my sizes, I pay. Done

 

She goes to eat at these BBQ places? I prefer hot chicken wings, that's it. 

 

We'll I guess you get where I want to go.

 

A perfect good life is a happy wife, therefor I stay away, and when first she have access to everything I transfer, she does a he'll of a good job saving us money to.

 

I still driving both the car and the motorbikes. Never passenger if that makes it better. But she is not a pillon if we bring both bikes, she drives herself.