Short-Time Life vs. Thai Wife Life: Who’s Actually Winning?

[SoCal1990]

So you got the two common routes you see foreign men take in Thailand. The “settle down with a Thai wife” path, and the “short-time, no-strings” path.

 

The wife route often comes with a hefty monthly price tag. Family costs, house, car, ongoing support, it all adds up really fast. And after the honeymoon period fades, a lot of these guys quietly admit they’re lucky to get it once a week, some go months, some basically live in a sexless routine with constant financial outflow. Living the "quiet roommate" life. At best it's like living with a maid. 

 

Then there’s the short-time crew. Pay as you go, zero drama, no in-laws, no PMS, no monthly bills except rent and beer, more action in a week than most married guys see in a year, always on demand, always with a smile. They spend less, get more, and keep their freedom. And they can hire a maid if they need one to clean their place and do their laundry. 

 

So who’s really ahead in the long run? Maybe the wife-life is just a stable trap with diminishing returns. Or maybe it’s pure bliss. Maybe the short-time guys are the smart ones, avoiding the slow financial and emotional bleed. Or maybe they’re the ones missing out on something. Guess it all depends on one's own perspective.

[novacova]

7 minutes ago, SoCal1990 said:

The wife route often comes with a hefty monthly price tag.

The wife came with her own house, inherited half ownership of a rice farm and other entrepreneurial ventures she created and has her own money as do I. Though this is normal any two self respecting people. 
The folk you are citing here behaved the same way as they did in their home country, what else is new?

[BangkokReady]

You seem to be comparing worst case scenario with best case scenario.  Obviously biased.  Not much point in engaging.

[1FinickyOne]

It used to be, long ago, that most of us chose all of the above...

[short-Timer]

You already know which one I won't be choosing. 😂

[connda]

1 hour ago, SoCal1990 said:

the “short-time, no-strings” path.

Those types either leave (bob smith) or die (maybe bob smith too), or check themselves into rehab and are never heard from again (bob smith for sure).

[connda]

1 hour ago, SoCal1990 said:

So you got the two common routes you see foreign men take in Thailand. The “settle down with a Thai wife” path, and the “short-time, no-strings” path.

Or both. 

[Lacessit]

Short times are good when one has enough testosterone to stay the course. It's mostly the variety.

 

In the seventies and eighties, sex becomes much less important than someone who can take care of me.

 

I am not going to get that care from a sexpot, twenty-something airhead.

 

 

[Will B Good]

 

If I'm winning....I'd like to know how and in what way?

[Kinnock]

Describing a worst case version of married life and a fairytale fantasy of prostition is hardly a balanced opening post.

 

And I think there's a dozen senior monks who will disagree with your puerile description of paying for sex.

 

And even if you ignore the caring companionship of a loving wife and just focus on the sex, the need for condoms and/or penicillin when having short term relationships is a downer, whereas knowing what each likes and being focussed on giving pleasure can make long term relationship sex more fulfilling than short term ever could be.  

 

If we're being honest, short term sex is just a juvenile p¥ssy w@#k, whereas sex with the right loving partner is on a higher plane.

 

If you choose the right partner, which in Thailand can also be someone 20+ years younger than yourself, then it can be wonderful.

[short-Timer]

43 minutes ago, Will B Good said:

 

If I'm winning....I'd like to know how and in what way?

 

If you have to ask then you're probably not winning.

[Yagoda]

58 minutes ago, Lacessit said:

I am not going to get that care from a sexpot, twenty-something airhead.

 

I do. If I require care, Ill go back to the USA and hire a Filipina

[Cameroni]

Nobody wins. You're born with nothing. And you go with nothing. 

 

There's no winning and no losing.

 

Only love and affection of others can make it bearable. If you're just looking for profit and wins, you'll be very disappointed.

 

 

[save the frogs]

15 hours ago, SoCal1990 said:

Guess it all depends on one's own perspective.

 

There's a guy on Youtube who looks miserable and looks like he will never recover emotionally and psychologically from his divorce where his wife left him. There are guys like that who get burned and are scarred for life. 

 

Ideally, a "good marriage" is better than pay for play. But not everyone attains it and sometimes Pay for Play might be a better option for some people as their luck in finding a good partner and making it work out long-term doesn't seem to be in their favor. 

 

Just like many women in the pay for play scene are content with that lifestyle and have given up trying to find a perfect marriage partner after a failed marriage. 

 

 

[chawbdurian]

Your idea of what marriage entails is twisted. Maybe you don't realize it but you sound like some kind of sex-addict, or maybe someone who got burned too many time by evil women. I think it's time for serious introspection OP. Lay off the kitty and booze for a year. 
 

 

[Jim Blue]

I tried to steer my wife down the short time road but somehow we ended up forever! Seems she was the better driver !

[Hummin]

6 hours ago, SoCal1990 said:

So you got the two common routes you see foreign men take in Thailand. The “settle down with a Thai wife” path, and the “short-time, no-strings” path.

 

The wife route often comes with a hefty monthly price tag. Family costs, house, car, ongoing support, it all adds up really fast. And after the honeymoon period fades, a lot of these guys quietly admit they’re lucky to get it once a week, some go months, some basically live in a sexless routine with constant financial outflow. Living the "quiet roommate" life. At best it's like living with a maid. 

 

Then there’s the short-time crew. Pay as you go, zero drama, no in-laws, no PMS, no monthly bills except rent and beer, more action in a week than most married guys see in a year, always on demand, always with a smile. They spend less, get more, and keep their freedom. And they can hire a maid if they need one to clean their place and do their laundry. 

 

So who’s really ahead in the long run? Maybe the wife-life is just a stable trap with diminishing returns. Or maybe it’s pure bliss. Maybe the short-time guys are the smart ones, avoiding the slow financial and emotional bleed. Or maybe they’re the ones missing out on something. Guess it all depends on one's own perspective.

Having a wife in Thailand doesn't cost more than single life, I would say I save money by having a steady relationship. 

 

We travel cheaper than I would had done as a bachelor, eat more home, do not go on dates or nightclubs. 

 

Do not buy new 1,6 mill motorbike and wife happy with a simple pick up. And I'm not living in an rented appartment at 50k, but bought land and built a small farm for 24 month rent

[Gottfrid]

Easy to answer, as the wifw route is the normal way to go. The other way is staying in Thailand as a sexpat, which is generally both disgusting and sick.

[save the frogs]

22 hours ago, Hummin said:

Having a wife in Thailand doesn't cost more than single life, I would say I save money by having a steady relationship. 

 

Depends who you marry.

Plenty of girls in debt, no money, no job or crap job. 

 

[Will B Good]

15 hours ago, short-Timer said:

 

If you have to ask then you're probably not winning.

 

Exactly!!

[Lucky Bones]

Oh Dear! Luckily the topic heading gave  it away. 14,742nd rehash of this tosh.🙃🙃

[newbee2022]

23 hours ago, SoCal1990 said:

So you got the two common routes you see foreign men take in Thailand. The “settle down with a Thai wife” path, and the “short-time, no-strings” path.

 

The wife route often comes with a hefty monthly price tag. Family costs, house, car, ongoing support, it all adds up really fast. And after the honeymoon period fades, a lot of these guys quietly admit they’re lucky to get it once a week, some go months, some basically live in a sexless routine with constant financial outflow. Living the "quiet roommate" life. At best it's like living with a maid. 

 

Then there’s the short-time crew. Pay as you go, zero drama, no in-laws, no PMS, no monthly bills except rent and beer, more action in a week than most married guys see in a year, always on demand, always with a smile. They spend less, get more, and keep their freedom. And they can hire a maid if they need one to clean their place and do their laundry. 

 

So who’s really ahead in the long run? Maybe the wife-life is just a stable trap with diminishing returns. Or maybe it’s pure bliss. Maybe the short-time guys are the smart ones, avoiding the slow financial and emotional bleed. Or maybe they’re the ones missing out on something. Guess it all depends on one's own perspective.

Typical.

Reduced all to "spending" and money.

At the very end of farang's life the "short-time" will be the loser. Alone in a hospital, or his room, without a caring heart. 

[atpeace]

18 minutes ago, newbee2022 said:

Typical.

Reduced all to "spending" and money.

At the very end of farang's life the "short-time" will be the loser. Alone in a hospital, or his room, without a caring heart. 

many short timers with many friends. I have a great partner but dying alone isn't  the reason we are together.  That would be pathetically weak. 

 

Btw, dying without a loving partner happens about 50% of the time and impossible to avoid.  Well, I guess it far less likely if you have many partners...

[newbee2022]

17 minutes ago, atpeace said:

many short timers with many friends. I have a great partner but dying alone isn't  the reason we are together.  That would be pathetically weak. 

 

Btw, dying without a loving partner happens about 50% of the time and impossible to avoid.  Well, I guess it far less likely if you have many partners...

Well, the short timers wouldn't admit not being able for a serious commitment like marriage. I understand that. And many are not even divorced with a lot of luggage in their home country. Who would admit to be a loser?

Everybody is looking for his place. I will not judge.

I'm happily married here since almost 20 years and will be happy to have her at my side when I'll die.

[spidermike007]

I think for some of us as we get older the sex is still fun but it no longer takes front seat, and is no longer quite as important as it used to be.

 

So what remains? Hopefully a very good friendship, enjoying time together on a daily basis, having each other's back all the time, making each other laugh and a feeling of well-being waking up next to somebody that you adore. It's pretty hard to put a price on that. 

 

I think if something were to happen to my woman or to our relationship I would probably remain single and go the short time route from this point forward. Having said that I'm very grateful for our relationship, and I wouldn't trade it for anything. 

 

I have a lot of single friends and most of them would prefer to be in a wonderful and meaningful relationship. Some simply can't afford one, and some just don't have the good fortune to meet the right woman, who is a great fit. I'm kind of at a point in my life where I have very low tolerance for nonsense, so there's a fairly narrow band of women that I would be really compatible with. 

 

I lived alone for 21 years prior to meeting my gal, I had a series of relationships, but none of them were really meaningful to the point where I wanted to devote my life to the woman. So, I have a bit of perspective on the matter, thankfully. And alot of gratitude.