20 minutes ago, Hummin said:

One simple answer, for those who do not give up the dream about true love, true love exists, while for some others, it dies with first attempt or second attempt. 

 

Is that better? 

So you're agreeing with me, that Hollywood fantasy of true monogamous love with one partner for a lifetime doesn't exist.

Just now, BritManToo said:

So you're agreeing with me, that Hollywood fantasy of true monogamous love with one partner for a lifetime doesn't exist.

 

Hollywood love is all over the place, meaning there is countless of movies that shows in excellent ways how difficult true lifelong love is, so I really do not see the realism in your question. 

 

And realism is maybe the most difficult part of life where we creating false imaginary dreams and hope for how life is going to be and not to be. 

 

As I stated in the beginning, if you dream about true love, you have to work for it, and most give up because they are not willing to walk the extra mile. 

 

You create true love, and with the right partner for you, it can be achieved if both is on the same path and willing to do the little extra to manage. 

 

True love is a definition question after all

 

Life long monogamous love? I do not know how realistic that is, but for 10 years I had one partner only, and I think and hope I can say the same the day I die, but within that, there is no certainty except I do what I can to make that be. 

12 minutes ago, Hummin said:

As I stated in the beginning, if you dream about true love, you have to work for it, and most give up because they are not willing to walk the extra mile. 

But you didn't find it in your home country.

And had to travel to Pattaya before you found any woman that would agree to be with you.

Where you used your western financial advantage to leverage a much younger and desperate Thai single mom into your bed.

 

Same as the rest of us.

7 minutes ago, BritManToo said:

But you didn't find it in your home country.

And had to travel to Pattaya before you found any woman that would agree to be with you.

Where you used your western financial advantage to leverage a much younger and desperate Thai single mom into your bed.

 

Same as the rest of us.

 

Again, poor assumptions from you

56 minutes ago, BritManToo said:

Odd you claiming all the other posters are trolls.

There's only one poster on this thread causing problems for everyone else.

That troll is the most opinionated, smug, scumbag currently using this forum.

Can you guess who I'm posting about?

 

Airalee? 

 

33 minutes ago, gamb00ler said:

The business model of substack is to draw in ANYBODY with an opinion.  Let them 'publish' it and hope enough nitwits want to read it so then the author tries to monetize it... and then substack charges a percentage.  TANSTAAFL excepting trash cans.

True,  Substack is mostly a dumpster fire. 

A quarrelsome exchange of posts was removed  Please debate the subject politely. Thank you. 

Long term relationships will often start to suck. Being alone is not all that. At least now you can do your thing with less chance of seeming weird or being ostracised. No one cares what you do. 

 

24 minutes ago, BritManToo said:

Same as the rest of us.

 

People are over-hyping relationships in Thailand compared to the West.

The parameters are different, but it's still complicated and full of problems. 

 

In the West, most women have decent to good to great jobs and most women do not come from poor families. You can lose a lot in divorce, though.

 

Here, it's the opposite. The divorce laws aren't crazy, but most women available to retirees are from poor families, hookers or no jobs or low-paying jobs, have children from previous marriages, and poor parents in the village to support. And you need to buy property which is not in your name.

 

With some exceptions.

Unless you came here in your 20s. 

 

And yet it keeps getting hyped up on here. Move to SEA to get away from Western feminists, they tell you. You can live in Thailand on 50 cents a month !! 

 

The last girl I spoke to has 2 children and poor parents and no job and 240,000 Thai Baht of debt. 

 

 

 

15 hours ago, save the frogs said:

Sells how? 

More real estate? 

And everything else mate that (mostly) blokes pay for when they get married - and for the rest of their lives - or until divorced - and even then for years for the kids she had (which maybe the bloke's who is paying).

I recall Lee Marvin was said after being divorced in CA under those new marriage laws (something like) - "I have worked it out and we were together X years so that means it cost me $Z  every time I pharked her - I think I will rent from now on'. 

My advice is stick with soapies and a dog for companionship.

 

Actually a serious response. I didn't take my own advice. Too late now, waiting for the kid to go to uni so I can skadaddle.

31 minutes ago, EVENKEEL said:

My advice is stick with soapies and a dog for companionship.

If O&A a lot, then skip the dog, as pet friendly hotels are scarce in TH, especially without a partner to call and ask about policy & prices.

 

Without the wife, I'd be O&A with van or truck RV, though not a bad option at all, as always enjoyed camping, and can almost park anywhere for that view, and peace & quiet 

While science for those who still trust science and what is beneficial for a healthy life is:

 

social relationships and friendships are crucial for longevity and are associated with living longer, healthier lives. Strong social connections protect against illness, improve mental and physical health, and are linked to a higher chance of survival. Loneliness and social isolation, conversely, have been shown to increase the risk of premature death. 

 

Both friendship and relationships takes effort to manage. And treat your wife or girl friend as your best friend, give and take can be beneficial for you. 

 

If you only look at it as an mutual transaction, you already treat it in a negative way, and is that healthy for the long run? 

1 hour ago, gamb00ler said:

The business model of substack is to draw in ANYBODY with an opinion.  Let them 'publish' it and hope enough nitwits want to read it so then the author tries to monetize it... and then substack charges a percentage.  TANSTAAFL excepting trash cans.

Yep, substack is an 'open' space where anybody can express their opinions. Of course, that allows 'misinformation', 'disinformation', etc. to be expressed for the gullible to consume, however, there are at least some substackers that are able to freely state 'uncomfortable facts'.

It would be unfortunate to' throw the baby out with the bathwater' when it comes to substack, but it is obviously a choice.

2 hours ago, BritManToo said:

My friends, family, work mates and neighbours have all suffered in exactly the same way. I only know 2x couples that appeared to love each other until death. One couple she shagged around when he was younger but he forgave her (he's 80+ in a care home with Alzheimer's. The other couple were both on their second marriages (died in their 80s a year or two back).

 

No real 'life long true love' stories at all. 

 

That is your socio economic demographic.  I have noticed that the boomer generation has a problem with relationships since the boomers tend to be self centered and selfish. Gen X and Millenials are doing just fine.

1 hour ago, BritManToo said:

Same as the rest of us.

 

Not even close 

On 11/29/2025 at 10:35 AM, BritManToo said:

True love, marriage and regular sex for men in long term heterosexual relationships as espoused by Hollywood, novels and the public in general.

It doesn't exist in the western world, but nobody questions the fantasy .................

 

Sure you can get the odd bang, but not much after the first 2-3 years in a relationship.

You'd probably get more sex from random one night encounters with random women, than from a LTR with just the one.

But you dare not cohabit or have kids with a woman because she'll invariably take your pension, home assets and future income.

But nobody appears to publicly point this out, and anyone daring to try gets silenced fairly quickly.

 

Almost nobody on this forum has managed to achieve this in the west (that's why we're all here, right?)

And I'll get many thumbs down for pointing this out, even though the thumbs down will come from people that never achieved this 'holy grail'.

You've all either 1) failed to get a women, or 2) succeeded and been divorced and asset stripped.

 

But why deny and hide this truth?

 

You got shafted and you will die single. Deal with it and stop projecting. It's not a good look.

2 hours ago, BritManToo said:

But you didn't find it in your home country.

And had to travel to Pattaya before you found any woman that would agree to be with you.

Where you used your western financial advantage to leverage a much younger and desperate Thai single mom into your bed.

 

Same as the rest of us.

 

There is no 'us' no matter how many times you suggest that you're part of some huge, sad, farang male collective here.

 

There's you and your social inadequacies and the projections that emanate therefrom.

11 minutes ago, NanLaew said:

You got shafted and you will die single. Deal with it and stop projecting. It's not a good look.

I've been married to a really nice Thai lady for the past 16 years, one kid has completed university and is a logistics manager for a factory with 8 staff, the other is still in high school.

I've bought her a house, a car, a scooter, put her through high school and university and try to take care of all her needs, but not all her wants.

 

I'm really happy with her, life is great!

40 minutes ago, Celsius said:

Not even close 

Didn't keep one in your home country, failed with 2 more in Canada, Now here with the rest of us and a local lady.

Hardly part of our 'till death us do part' romantic fantasy, but then you're from Eastern Europe so not really part of that fantasy.

7 minutes ago, BritManToo said:

I've been married to a really nice Thai lady for the past 16 years, one kid has completed university and is a logistics manager for a factory with 8 staff, the other is still in high school.

I've bought her a house, a car, a scooter, put her through high school and university and try to take care of all her needs, but not all her wants.

 

I'm really happy with her, life is great!

 

   Are you married to both your Wife and your step daughter ?

30 minutes ago, BritManToo said:

I've been married to a really nice Thai lady for the past 16 years, one kid has completed university and is a logistics manager for a factory with 8 staff, the other is still in high school.

I've bought her a house, a car, a scooter, put her through high school and university and try to take care of all her needs, but not all her wants.

 

I'm really happy with her, life is great!

You understand with your and a few others tactics when debating in this tread, we can question your deeds as just trying to make you look better? Bragging how good you are, and why? We can pull you down in the dirt, roll you around, and spit you out again. What comes around goes around. 

 

Whatever we trying to share here, we get negative feedback, even when we have the best intentions. 

 

Back to the topics, hard work is the only thing that works, together with mutual understanding. 

 

Be it love, health or whatever, you have to work for it, it doesn't come by itself

 

And no, never had a book of self help or any other book about relationships. I have learned by doing and continuously questioning myself, evaluating myself, and as well the other part, and the contribution the other part gives. Most is self explaining when it comes to relationships, and also learning by others experience is essential.

 

 

 

On 11/29/2025 at 10:35 AM, BritManToo said:

True love, marriage and regular sex for men in long term heterosexual relationships as espoused by Hollywood, novels and the public in general.

It doesn't exist in the western world, but nobody questions the fantasy .................

 

Sure you can get the odd bang, but not much after the first 2-3 years in a relationship.

You'd probably get more sex from random one night encounters with random women, than from a LTR with just the one.

But you dare not cohabit or have kids with a woman because she'll invariably take your pension, home assets and future income.

But nobody appears to publicly point this out, and anyone daring to try gets silenced fairly quickly.

 

Almost nobody on this forum has managed to achieve this in the west (that's why we're all here, right?)

And I'll get many thumbs down for pointing this out, even though the thumbs down will come from people that never achieved this 'holy grail'.

You've all either 1) failed to get a women, or 2) succeeded and been divorced and asset stripped.

 

But why deny and hide this truth?

Hell BritManToo, I've been married for close to 40 years (well, when you combine all 4 marriages that is)    

With that said, I wouldn't recommend to any Western hetero young man to ever consider marriage with a Western woman, nor taking your non-Western spouse back to your home country to learn how to be a Western woman.
 

10 minutes ago, Hummin said:

understand with your and a few others tactics when debating in this tread, we can question your deeds as just trying to make you look better? Bragging how good you are, and why? We can pull you down in the dirt, roll you around, and spit you out again. What comes around goes around. 

Don't think I've ever tried to make myself look better (what does that even mean).

I rented my wife, being unable to procure a free one, I've never considered myself a good or moral person.

I've paid many women for sex, both before and during my current marriage. My only marriage vow to my Thai wife were to 'take care' and I've mostly kept to that vow.

 

But I've never deliberately tried to hurt another human of any sex.

29 minutes ago, BritManToo said:

I've been married to a really nice Thai lady for the past 16 years, one kid has completed university and is a logistics manager for a factory with 8 staff, the other is still in high school.

I've bought her a house, a car, a scooter, put her through high school and university and try to take care of all her needs, but not all her wants.

 

I'm really happy with her, life is great!

 

It's funny how you brag, but when I say my wife is not a prostitute, is Chinese with MBA, earns her own money and I never paid her a dime to be in my company you literally flip out. You don't seem to understand non transactional relationships.

27 minutes ago, BritManToo said:

I've been married to a really nice Thai lady for the past 16 years, one kid has completed university and is a logistics manager for a factory with 8 staff, the other is still in high school.

I've bought her a house, a car, a scooter, put her through high school and university and try to take care of all her needs, but not all her wants.

 

I'm really happy with her, life is great!

About the same story here except I have a grown step-son who a treat like he's my biological son.  I learned many years ago to act like by male, married Thai counterparts.  Thailand is a fun place to live.  

2 minutes ago, BritManToo said:

Don't think I've ever tried to make myself look better (what does that even mean).

I rented my wife, being unable to procure a free one, I've never considered myself a good or moral person.

I've paid many women for sex.

 

But I've never deliberately tried to hurt another human of any sex.

In your eyes, lying doesn't count then................🤣

4 minutes ago, transam said:

In your eyes, lying doesn't count then................🤣

Lying for entertainment, or to spare anothers feelings is totally acceptable IMHO.

'does this dress make my bum look big?'

'no darling, you look amazing'

3 minutes ago, Celsius said:

 

It's funny how you brag, but when I say my wife is not a prostitute, is Chinese with MBA, earns her own money and I never paid her a dime to be in my company you literally flip out. You don't seem to understand non transactional relationships.

But on the other hand, I've never taken part in ethnic cleansing or deliberately harmed another human being 

Just now, BritManToo said:

Lying for entertainment, or to spare anothers feelings is totally acceptable IMHO.

'does this dress make my bum look big?'

Yes, in YOUR opinion, which is exactly that, you don't care about hurting someone's feelings with a blatant lie, as you did with me....You have a creepy mind set......😒