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Ten Things You Will Never Hear In Thailand.........

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Non - Thai - I have my name on land deads and i own 100%.

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Thai guy = I will never use the word Farang ever again

If you can beat this, I'll be shocked

Thai: That Stilton looks nice. Can I have a slice please?

I should add that the last comment was inspired by a meal I had with a Thai lady at one of Bangkok's primo expensive Indian restaurants.

Having ordered waaay too much food I had it boxed up and offered it to some Thai girls at a bar I often then used.

None of them would eat it...eventually one of them said she would give it to her son for his packed lunch the next day.

But only cos he had been a bad boy recently....ohmy.png

The poor laddie...1k Baht lunch as a punishment....the mind boggles!! blink.png

This enjoyable thread is now going 'off the rails'..

thai wife: and I shall not rail at you if you display disgusting, licencious, middle aged fat falang behavior...just stick to the market and the fresh tofu...(tutsi: 'heh, heh, heh...' the tofu lady down the market she swivels suggestively to 'display' a more alluring backside aspect...)

the thai darling ---------the darling farang

good, you not believe me , all time .

farang , not stewpid.

giggle.giflicklips.gif

Thai wife - No dah link, I don't care if you have a mia noi. In fact, bring her around for a threesome.

Thai wife - Dah link, Thai Oil just found oil on papas rice farm and now we are rich!

Thai wife - Dah link, what you mean I no cook for you, you know I have to take care my German boyfriend today

Thai wife - Dah link, why you no go and get nice massage with happy ending.

I will come in your mouth.

You b*stard. I was just thinking what to have for supper. biggrin.png

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I will come in your mouth.

You b*stard. I was just thinking what to have for supper. biggrin.png

cheesy.gif Right you two........you'll get us in trouble with f1 again rolleyes.gif

But then again.....never a truer word said.........

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I will come in your mouth.

You b*stard. I was just thinking what to have for supper. biggrin.png

I suppose the rice soup is off then...cheesy.gif

I will come in your mouth.

You b*stard. I was just thinking what to have for supper. biggrin.png

I suppose the rice soup is off then...cheesy.gif

I used to enjoy a slice of cold salty porridge back home for breakfast but I doubt I'll be able to face it ever again after this experience....

I will come in your mouth.

You b*stard. I was just thinking what to have for supper. biggrin.png

Dial 1112 for Thaddeus. rolleyes.gif

Thai teacher to class:

"Please feel free ask questions at any time, and if I don't know the answer I will try to find out what it is. nobody loses face because they don't know something, but it sure is silly not to ask and find out.

Farang...."I'm an alcoholic!"

Farang...."Bar fine a girl. Never! 'Tis beneath my standards"

Farang...."I'm an alcoholic!"

Farang...."Bar fine a girl. Never! 'Tis beneath my standards"

Oh <deleted>! I've done it again, 'Things you wouldn't hear!'rolleyes.gif

Thai student = If I don't understand what my foreign teacher is teaching, I will put my hand up and tell my teacher I don't understand and if I still don't understand I will keep asking untill I understand.

We give you water meter back for free as your late payment was under 100 Baht.

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I will come in your mouth.

You b*stard. I was just thinking what to have for supper. biggrin.png

Dial 1112 for Thaddeus. rolleyes.gif

Actually it's 666

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Farang to another Farang - Ya know what? Most of the shit that people complain about here is secretly the reason we stay here rather than our own over policed, over governed nanny states, but we are too scared to say so in public.

Its been good but I think this thread is done.

Its been good but I think this thread is done.

Wrong. Keep your contributions rolling in please everyone.....

Its been good but I think this thread is done.

Wrong. Keep your contributions rolling in please everyone.....

You're quite right - I hear that all the time, mostly from the original poster when the thread takes a wrong turn, or people start having a go at him and telling him to grow a pear (or maybe Grow Up, Eh? - I could have mis-heard)

Back on topic -

Yourself think, above the clamour in a shopping centre on a Saturday

SC

bargirl : sure,you can put it in my ass ,same price ,no extra charge .....licklips.gif

Schroedinger's cat

At a practical level that concept doesn't work here.

Schroedinger's Thai cat

Einstein: So, Herr Schrodinger, how was your experiment

Schroedinger: Its fookin gone. Not dead, not alive, its gone!, lock, stock and giblets!

Belches offstage...

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