Marriage to foreigners not all it's cracked up to be complains Isaan woman stuck in Farangland!

[dontoearth]

      I am foreigner living here in Thailand and I don't have any maids or cooks.  I couldn't afford any of that.  And if I don't have it here where it costs maybe 10% of what it would cost in the USA then why would you expect me to have it there?  I understand the Thai think any person that can afford a plane ticket here lives in a castle and is a member of the landed gentry but it ain't so!    A poor thai girl with fantasies has now run into middle class life abroad!  It is ok, but not the thing of movies and TV shows.    You cook your own food.  You clean your own house.  I have a thai friend in Chicago that is amazed there isn't cheap street food available on carts in the evening.  He is amazed his small bag of take out food is over $10 USD.   How are people to eat?  Where is the noodle cart?  He is a good kid but has run into just what the little lady is complaining about.  There is no fresh food unless you pay ridiculous prices at the grocery.  People work there asses off and go home late to eat their own dinner.  There is no endless family over chattering for hours and playing cards and laughing.   No neighbors over every evening sharing food.  The entire middle class is in the same money chase.  They work there asses off and don't have endless free days for play and family.  I am sure this is very isolating for the poor girl as well.

      

[Naam]

10 hours ago, Docno said:

Irresponsible OP ... seems to have misrepresented what the video was all about. I showed it to my gf and she said the lady was simply telling girls back home to not marry a farang if you think it means living the easy life. She wasn't saying her own expectations were dashed or anything of that sort. Just trying to give other girls a dose of reality.  

a noble but futile attempt to shut down the raving and ranting keyboard warriors who insinuate, invent and misinterprete because these  poor and frustrated individuals feel better when experiencing "schadenfreude". 

[Oziex1]

17 minutes ago, micmichd said:

Then it's the Farang's duty to tell the truth and show it to the Thai lady before marrying. Otherwise it turns out to be a trap.

 

What you say is reasonable, however in my experience, no matter what you say there will be a Thai person with a view that you the Farang is fantastically rich and your country is a wonderland.

Here lies the problem as the Thais will believe their own almost all the time, regardless of how hard you try and sell the truth.

Edited February 4, 2018 by Oziex1
Typo

[Ozfatboy]

My Isaan wife spent three months in Australia before we married, she quickly realised that life there was not what she thought it would be and decided she did not want to move there. Life on a farm was much better than having all that responsibility of normal Australian life!

[Henrik Andersen]

4 hours ago, 4MyEgo said:

My wife lived in farang land with me for 9 years, supporting me while I worked and raised my daughter as a single dad when she was in my care, my daughter is now 21 and looks after herself. During that time, my wife never complained or expected anything. My daughter is currently here visiting and staying with us and still calls my wife mum, that's respect.

 

I build her a 6 bedroom 3 bathroom house in Isaan where we have lived since I retired, she refuses to have a "maid" clean her house, oh well, I did try a couple of times.

 

Never did ask her if she wanted a cook, because I can still clearly remember the day when she first walked into the house in farang land, standing in the hallway, she asked, where is the kitchen, I said, this way, and as she walked into the kitchen she said, you not come in here anymore, this is my space, and that's how its been ever since, and she loves to cook, and boy she she muster up a storm without a sweat, never a day gone by where she has refused to cook me a meal.

 

She has never asked for hand outs, although asked if I could send money every now and again to her parents when we lived in farang land, of which I did, it was on a monthly basis 10,000 baht, with some TVF cheap Charlie's saying I was crazy.

 

Yeh, thinks me married the wrong girl 555

You lucky yes some few are but 6 bedroom house for 3 people hmmm

[PEE TEE]

O dear .. she found out that money does not grow on trees in falangdland . never mind if she is married in germany or the Uk she can get a divorce take him for all his money house ect and buy a condo in Thailand  and have her own maids ect. 

[Ron19]

A troll / flame post and answer have been removed.

[Petchou]

4 hours ago, stigar said:

Wages in norway is about 800 bath pr hour...free hospitals..heart operations...i wery sick free helicopterfligth to nearest surgery...if no work welfare thats MUCH higher then thailand..if give birth goverment give 12000 EURO for free...give 4000 bath a month for kids..age between 1-2 years old 1000 EURO extre pr month...when work give 11% of all year salary for hoidaymoney....pigmeet cheaper in norway then thailand...and she complaining?????..OMG

Better she go back..if they get unemployd goverment give them money everyday until they back work again.this they can receive 104 weeks...if get sick and cant work keep same salary 12 month..mostly of this girls just saving their money here and dont pay a bill in the household ...but still complaining.

I forgot minimum 600 hour free norwegian lessons in school

Life and happiness is not about numbers and € sign.   There are things you can't buy or access.   That's big part of the Lady's complaint.

[Maverell]

We have to remember, perhaps already posted here, that there are many many Thai girls who have moved to farang land with their farang husband and are very happy. I blame the guy in this case for not saying how it really is before they went. Unless she didn't believe him of course and listened to all her village friends and relatives with their fairy stories instead.....I know which scenario is the more likely.

[micmichd]

On 03/02/2018 at 12:00 PM, JOC said:

Poor little thing.....!!

She forgot to mention, that if she had to work (Buddha forbid) to help supporting the family, the minimum wage in Germany is 8.84 Euro = 353  baht PER HOUR......

Guess you're joking. Who in Germany would hire a young lady of colour  who might be pregnant?

[ncc1701d]

Is she speaking like it’s not what she expected and for other Thai girls be careful, or is she complaining?

[micmichd]

1 hour ago, Oziex1 said:

 

What you say is reasonable, however in my experience, no matter what you say there will be a Thai person with a view that you the Farang is fantastically rich and your country is a wonderland.

Here lies the problem as the Thais will believe their own almost all the time, regardless of how hard you try and sell the truth.

And vice versa. You know what Farang folks say about Thailand, especially when it comes to Issan girls? 

Especially Farang women will try everything to keep them down. 

I know many Issan ladies who have been to Farang countries or still live there - not one of them is really happy there. 

[4MyEgo]

1 hour ago, Henrik Andersen said:

You lucky yes some few are but 6 bedroom house for 3 people hmmm

4 kids, 2 sleep in the same room as they are young, and one section of the house is a self contained one bedroom flat 112 square metres which mum and dad occupy, it was going to be for mum, but dementia got to her before she could make it here, so she is looked after in a nursing home back in farang land unfortunately, and we have a spare bedroom for guests, when the little ones who share the same room, grow a little, in a year or two we will separate them, if willing, and will still have a spare guests room.

[micmichd]

On 03/02/2018 at 11:58 AM, darksidedog said:

Damn glad I never married this whining old trout. Maybe she would be  better off going back to the jungle and eating garbage.

You have obviously never been to an Issan farm or experienced the burning heat in an Issan rice field. 

[Beats56]

On 03/02/2018 at 1:10 PM, smedly said:

well she does now, she might even have to work in a real job to help pay the bills instead of swaning around in a bar surfing facebook getting drunk and partying

 

Many Thai girls (just like westerners) work hard but there are also many that don't and are generally lazy  

You are right. There are some on my wife's family that are lazy as a pet coon. (That racoon so don't take that the wrong way)

 

[Odysseus123]

19 minutes ago, micmichd said:

And vice versa. You know what Farang folks say about Thailand, especially when it comes to Issan girls? 

Especially Farang women will try everything to keep them down. 

I know many Issan ladies who have been to Farang countries or still live there - not one of them is really happy there. 

They often have deep rooted ties to their families and friends.

 

Many are lonely and do experience a tremendous feeling of being isolated, which in countries as socially and culturally alienated as most Western ones are,is hardly surprising.

 

The family that runs the local cake shop here show delight when I speak Thai to them and they are Cambodian!

 

So now I am commencing to learn Khmer.          What this Isaan lady is saying appears to be quite reasonable and appropriate to me.

Edited February 4, 2018 by Odysseus123

[moonseeker]

21 hours ago, RichardColeman said:

Looks like most Thai woman that move to the west to me. Just fat ! 

Looks like most bar girls in Pattaya. Dressed w/o taste and fat. Not even mention som-tam odor. Go to BKK to see regular girls and ladies. Plenty of smart and hard working good looking girls. We can't generalize an entire country. I am doing the same often. MS>

[micmichd]

On 03/02/2018 at 12:05 PM, chippendale said:

Typical. Marry a peasant and move her out of the jungle to the developed world ... What results do you expect?

I doubt that those people on welfare or minimum wage in Farangland would call their country "developed". Quite contrary, many of those say everything is going down the gutter over there. And many (if not most) put the blame on immigrants. 

Would you like to live there as an immigrant?

[FunkyDunky58]

What an ignorant word to use (Farangland). What would Thai people think if we called Thailand Asialand? What was notably missing from this was any commentary from her on her man. Nothing about love or being with him making up for it all. Just complaints about not having money, things, and favours handed to her on a plate, which is what she very much looks like having gone into the relationship for. They say don't be with the woman you love, but with the woman that loves you. Sage advice. I would add be with the woman that loves you, not the woman that loves your money.

[Naam]

6 hours ago, stigar said:

Wages in norway is about 800 bath pr hour...free hospitals..heart operations...i wery sick free helicopterfligth to nearest surgery...if no work welfare thats MUCH higher then thailand..if give birth goverment give 12000 EURO for free...give 4000 bath a month for kids..age between 1-2 years old 1000 EURO extre pr month...when work give 11% of all year salary for hoidaymoney....pigmeet cheaper in norway then thailand...and she complaining?????..OMG

Better she go back..if they get unemployd goverment give them money everyday until they back work again.this they can receive 104 weeks...if get sick and cant work keep same salary 12 month..mostly of this girls just saving their money here and dont pay a bill in the household ...but still complaining.

I forgot minimum 600 hour free norwegian lessons in school

she not complain Norway, she no need Norwegian lessons because no have too much use of Norway language in Germany where pig meet not cheaper than Thailand and she no work and not get 11% holiday money in Germany.

[overherebc]

34 minutes ago, Naam said:

she not complain Norway, she no need Norwegian lessons because no have too much use of Norway language in Germany where pig meet not cheaper than Thailand and she no work and not get 11% holiday money in Germany.

No speak with forked tongue. Get medicine bad from.

[Acemaker]

On 2/3/2018 at 11:50 AM, Oziex1 said:

Sadly this is the price they pay for the almost complete lack of knowledge of the world beyond Thailand.

 

 

Anybody who marries a Thai Woman needs their Head examining, wakey wakey ! and no i have never Married one, i love playing the field and i am 107.   

[Acemaker]

13 hours ago, 473geo said:

This lady should indeed be praised by all those Farang intent on uprooting an Isaan lady and relocating to a 'better life'  - working 9-5 through the cold dark winter weeks to assist financially, while washing/cleaning/cooking/keeping house at the weekend for love.

Best they know what awaits - isn't it?

I think it would help alot if Farangatangs told them the truth in the first place instead of painting this picture of utopia in the promised Land.

[talahtnut]

15 hours ago, Acemaker said:

I think it would help alot if Farangatangs told them the truth in the first place instead of painting this picture of utopia in the promised Land.

Yeah, I know a fella, took beautiful Thai wife to UK home..she looked at house,

and said.."Whats this?!"

 

[sanemax]

2 minutes ago, talahtnut said:

Yeah, I know a fella, took beautiful Thai wife to UK home..she looked at house,

and said.."Whats this?!"

 

I know a fella who started posting on TV , I looked at his post and thought "Whats that?"

[ncc1701d]

2 hours ago, ncc1701d said:

Is she speaking like it’s not what she expected and for other Thai girls be careful, or is she complaining?

To answer my own question, according to my tgf, the girl is not complaining at all, in fact, just to educate Thai girls of the difference between expectations and reality of life in a foreign country. Until she experienced it, she couldn’t understand and she’s just trying to let people know that just because foreigners come to Thailand and spend a lot of money, doesn’t mean that’s how they are back in their home country.

 

I tried to explain this to my tgf when I first met her. She thought one of her friends boyfriends was really rich. He came to Thailand for 4 months of the year and spent big. Then he went home. I tried to explain that he works like a dog for 8 months, spends every pound he has when here and goes back to living in council flats and doesn’t have any savings, house or even a car. Anyway... she didn’t understand until I pointed at some road workers in Thailand and asked her if they was a good job in Thailand. She said not really, I said well that’s what her friends boyfriend does in England. 

[ncc1701d]

18 minutes ago, sanemax said:

I know a fella who started posting on TV , I looked at his post and thought "Whats that?"

To be fair, UK houses are pretty ugly.

[watcharacters]

 

 

 

 

I've run out of blood in my heart for this mistreated Issan Lady..   Does she have an exit plan?

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

[wavemanwww]

On 2/3/2018 at 4:09 PM, theguyfromanotherforum said:

I find British and German to be particularly dumb when choosing their Thai partners.

From my past Thai news reading the Germans seem to prefer TS. So guess the Germans may have more of an appendage preference rather than character preference!

[BangkokReady]

On 03/02/2018 at 8:40 AM, jenny2017 said:

Money grabbing.... The woman doesn't seem to be educated, even by Thai standards. 

 

grab

ɡrab/

verb

 

1. 1.

   grasp or seize suddenly and roughly.

   "she grabbed him by the shirt collar"

   synonyms:

   seize, grasp, snatch, take hold of, grip, clasp, clutch; More

2. informal

   attract the attention of; make an impression on.

   "how does that grab you?"

The term is money grubbing.

money-grubbing

UK     US   

 

Someone who is money-grubbing has money as their main interest and does anything possible to get a lot of it.

Thesaurus: synonyms and related words

Greedy

Edited February 4, 2018 by BangkokReady