This thai girl

[greytonlarken]

Me an european mid 20s farang, she a mid 20s thai. I read a lot about these stories and how they usually end up bad. Ive been in Pattaya for 1 month + 2 weeks. I have well running online businesses and no need to work or be at home. she probably knows im well off because i like to get drunk w/ bottles of vodka at clubs

 

I met her on tinder and explicitly said im just lookin to meet locals 4 a good time and not whores. We end up hooking up after a nice dinner and she stays with me for a a month. I have not given her 1 baht of cash, but pay for her food and casual activities like cinema. im talking regular food and not fancy places and stay at a normal non fancy hotel. i probably spend no more than 300-600 baht a day on her.

 

She worked "in a hotel" (her past facebook photos confirm that) but doesnt work atm. Apparently never been a bar girl or prostitution related. shes definitely not a hot pretty thai girl you find in bars but i like the way she is. 

 

She never asks me for money and shes from a poor family, the usual story eh, we visited her parents far up north - she "never introduced anyone else to them" but me because she loves me so much. doesnt like thai guys and only been with 2 farangs so far.

 

one shitfaced drunk night she asked me why i never pay her and shes so poor and blabla -  i kicked her out the next morning. few hours later she begs me shes sorry and wants to stay with me. ok for me, i like her.

 

 

im hone now. she hasnt asked for a single penny. she loves me so much and misses me and she's going to save money and wants to visit me here in europe.

 

Im considering going back there very soon for 1 - 2 months because I have nothing to do here in my home country and damn I like her and <deleted> I love pattaya

 

am I being played? am i missing something?

[poanoi]

her duty is to send 3k/month back to mommy,

if she isnt working, she can not perform her duty,

she is counting on you to pay.

if you arent intending to pay, you better split

the sooner the better before she falls behind more on payment.

the payment is their answer to pension in the west

Edited June 7, 2018 by poanoi

[blackcab]

A post in a foreign language has been removed.

 

English is the only acceptable language anywhere on ThaiVisa including Classifieds, except within the Thai language forum, where of course using Thai is allowed.

[blackcab]

A post discussing moderation has been removed.

[simoh1490]

What to say here? Thailand is a different world than the Europe you know and the people have different drivers. One of the key drivers of your lady friend is to support her parents and probably a larger family, this is her mission and she takes it very seriously. Another driver is to make sure she secures herself a reasonable future, one that gives her security so it appears in her case that means a farang husband rather than a Thai who will not treat her the same way, may beat her and will almost certainly be unfaithful. She could go and work in a bar and potentially make decent money and that would help her satisfy the part about looking after her family - but that's a tough life and not everyone can or wants to go that route. It's tough being a female in Thailand, future options are limited unless you're connected or have a good education.

 

So what are your options? You could carry on as you are, getting drunk in clubs and not giving her any money, if she hangs around in that situation she's a fool and eventually, she will tire of your drinking. You could recognise her plight, give her something every now and again or if you're not serious about her, part company and let her move on and find what she's looking for. You ask if you're being played, from the sound of things it's her that's being played because she's not getting much out of the relationship that she really needs, just something to think about.

 

It takes a while for most people to understand the way things and people are here, the way it all works and fits together. 

 

 

[cgphuket]

So your an entitled little mommys boy whose was fortunate enough to be born in an advanced country.  You feel its your birthright to live in a poor country and the local girls are obligated to come offer you free sex.   God, I cant even go on.  Your post was so annoying it would take a week to point out your defects.

[Beechboy]

I do not get this apparent boastfulness about not parting with much money.

 

These girls are generally and genuinely very hard up.

 

What are they supposed to live on  whilst spending time with a man such as this?

 

A very ignorant and self-satiating attitude.

[JHolmesJr]

22 hours ago, greytonlarken said:

doesnt work atm

 

apparently she does and you are it.

[samsensam]

 

who are '

2 minutes ago, Beechboy said:

I do not get this apparent boastfulness about not parting with much money.

 

These girls are generally and genuinely very hard up.

 

What are they supposed to live on  whilst spending time with a man such as this?

 

A very ignorant and self-satiating attitude.

 

who are ' these girls'?; do you mean lower class, lower educated girls working in, or on the edge of, the sex industry? or are you generalising that all thai girls need money?

 

i dont understand the bubble that some foreigners live in here, they don't seem to know anything about thailand, thais or thai culture.

 

every thai girl/woman i have dated has had an education, a career, an apartment, usually a car or even two, plenty of money and they certainly didnt date me for financial gain. this is not boastfulness, this is, for me, normality and it makes me a normal person - it doesn't make me 'ignorant or having a self-satiating attitude'.

 

 

[473geo]

Years ago a friend of a friend went on a tour of Thailand with a guy. She was away a month came back disappointed even after on occasion paying for her own food and drinks, he only gave her 1000 baht for the month

 

I'm not a rich guy but I gave her 3000 so she could send some home

 

If you come to Thailand doesn't matter how loaded you are if you don't part with it ?

 

If you can't spoil somebody once in while and see them happy......better stay at home

[Bangkok Ape]

Another sex tourist who doesn't want to pay. 

 

She's not with you for your good looks and striking personality, even if you were Brad Pitt her family still got to eat and it's her responsibility to provide for them. 

 

Either learn about how the poor operate and their needs or stay away from desperate Thai girls for both your sakes. 

Edited June 9, 2018 by Bangkok Ape

[chrisinth]

On 6/8/2018 at 1:50 AM, greytonlarken said:

She never asks me for money and shes from a poor family, the usual story eh, we visited her parents far up north - she "never introduced anyone else to them" but me because she loves me so much. doesnt like thai guys and only been with 2 farangs so far.

OP, the bold writing above might just give you a clue as to what is happening.

 

Anyone here that 'targets' foreigners (because they don't like Thai guys) needs a little verification IMO.

[jenny2017]

She never asks me for money and shes from a poor family, the usual story eh, we visited her parents far up north - she "never introduced anyone else to them" but me because she loves me so much. doesnt like thai guys and only been with 2 farangs so far.

 

one shitfaced drunk night she asked me why i never pay her and shes so poor and blabla -  i kicked her out the next morning. few hours later she begs me shes sorry and wants to stay with me. ok for me, i like her.

 

  It's time for the OP to grow some balls. 

[atyclb]

looking at the op profile thought the story would be about unprotected sex with a ladyboy and which clinic to go to.

[wombat]

i got as far as im in pattaya and i met her on tinder...

*clean up in aisle 5 please*

[Beechboy]

"who are ' these girls'?; do you mean lower class, lower educated girls working in, or on the edge of, the sex industry? or are you generalising that all thai girls need money?"

 

We are talking about one particular girl here who it has been stated is from a poor family. There are many others like her, hence "these girls."

 

If you are unable to fully comprehend the context of the original post and replies to it I suggest you stop dishing out unappreciated little lectures.

 

 

 

 

 

[atyclb]

On 6/8/2018 at 7:19 AM, cgphuket said:

So your an entitled little mommys boy whose was fortunate enough to be born in an advanced country.  You feel its your birthright to live in a poor country and the local girls are obligated to come offer you free sex.   God, I cant even go on.  Your post was so annoying it would take a week to point out your defects.

 

generally completely normal in developed countries to date and not give your dates a "fee for service" lol

 

also in developing countries the norm for most of society is the same except say for a high % of the expat population that are serviced by money girls and yes lots of non bar girls are looking for money also. even uni grads working in banks, hospitals, etc. a hospital admin gal went on one date with me then asked to borrow 5000 baht and i declined. she stopped contacting me but i was not heartbroken, more like comic relief.  seems borrowing money that they never pay back is not attaining money via sex.

 

i have gone out with both types, money seeking limited engagements and middle class and above no money.  its normal for a new younger fit guy to be put of by girls seeking money.  many expats see money for companionship as a requirement. frankly i see it as comic relief.

 

many working girls avoid young fit westerners because they know targeting fat old guys is more lucrative. to each their own.

 

i am pretending the op is not trolling

[atyclb]

On 6/8/2018 at 7:19 AM, cgphuket said:

So your an entitled little mommys boy whose was fortunate enough to be born in an advanced country.  You feel its your birthright to live in a poor country and the local girls are obligated to come offer you free sex.   God, I cant even go on.  Your post was so annoying it would take a week to point out your defects.

 

 

my advice to op. hang out at ekamai rd and thonglor road upscale clubs and find gals whose attraction is based on chemistry and not the payoff. just dont post here with your upscale success stories as you wont make many friends here lol

[473geo]

3 minutes ago, atyclb said:

 

 

my advice to op. hang out at ekamai rd and thonglor road upscale clubs and find gals whose attraction is based on chemistry and not the payoff. just dont post here with your upscale success stories as you wont make many friends here lol

 

Pleased you are offering advice because I was beginning to wonder, how these good looking young guys, over run by offers from young Thai professional career girls, appear to have ended up in the company of girls who expect the good looking young guys to spend money on them!

[Panda13]

14 hours ago, samsensam said:

 

who are '

 

who are ' these girls'?; do you mean lower class, lower educated girls working in, or on the edge of, the sex industry? or are you generalising that all thai girls need money?

 

i dont understand the bubble that some foreigners live in here, they don't seem to know anything about thailand, thais or thai culture.

 

every thai girl/woman i have dated has had an education, a career, an apartment, usually a car or even two, plenty of money and they certainly didnt date me for financial gain. this is not boastfulness, this is, for me, normality and it makes me a normal person - it doesn't make me 'ignorant or having a self-satiating attitude'.

 

 

No but it makes you a narrow minded A hole.

[impulse]

On 6/8/2018 at 2:50 AM, greytonlarken said:

She worked "in a hotel" (her past facebook photos confirm that) but doesnt work atm. 

 

Sure she does, boss.

[cyril sneer]

30 minutes ago, atyclb said:

i have gone out with both types, money seeking limited engagements and middle class and above no money.  its normal for a new younger fit guy to be put of by girls seeking money.  many expats see money for companionship as a requirement. frankly i see it as comic relief.

 

many working girls avoid young fit westerners because they know targeting fat old guys is more lucrative. to each their own.

true.

 

best way is to find a girl that already has an fat old guy providing them money

[mdmayes]

I recommend you read "Thailand Fever" by Chris Pirazzi and Vitida Vasant. It may set you straight on the Thai-Western relationship. 

If you want to keep this Thai girl you will need to change sooner than later. If she just your good time, let her go and move on. She deserves better. 

[473geo]

2 minutes ago, cyril sneer said:

true.

 

best way is to find a girl that already has an fat old guy providing them money

 

High standards, wow, and willing to share with a fat old guy, I suppose if that is the best you can hope for or can afford  go with it ?

[searay500]

She never asks me for money and shes from a poor family, the usual story eh, we visited her parents far up north - she "never introduced anyone else to them" but me because she loves me so much. doesnt like thai guys and only been with 2 farangs so far ...........

 

 

You seem to pointing out all her good point

maybe that is all you see in her during your stay....

 

what happen to her last farang ??!

If all Thai guy is rich....Thai girl will be going for them

if you fallen for her, use your common sense, don't listen to other stories, 

use your own judgement......treat her well and understand more on Thai custom , careful with your money

be ready to bail out if thing turn out south just fade away politely if thing not turn out right

 

[lionsincity]

"one shitfaced drunk night she asked me why i never pay her and shes so poor and blabla -  i kicked her out the next morning. few hours later she begs me shes sorry and wants to stay with me. ok for me, i like her."

 

 

you did the right thing in kicking her out after she had taken the "truth syrup"........it will only be a matter of time before she does it again.......act decisively next time.

 

 

[Proboscis]

Any woman or trans-woman you meet in Pattaya of whatever age, education or nationality (yes, you heard correctly!) is likely to be a player of some kind. Otherwise, why would she go there? And mark my words - I did not say hooker - I said player. In other words, they are there to play you, by which I mean some method in which you are separated from your cash whether that be small things like padding your bill to larger things like introducing you to people who will "go into business with you," sell you illegal substances or get you into trouble and then "help" you out of trouble because you are their "friend."

 

And yes, many players, especially in pattaya, are also involved in the sex game in some way or other, whether as hookers or as pimps or in some sort of long game that involves building relationships and then pumping the money that way. Chances are that your lady is of this kind who can portray herself as a "the good girl" or the "nice" girl but ask yourself, how does she live if she is not working at the moment ?Remember, ATM also stands for Automated Teller Machine! She may have several of those, one of whom is you.

 

I have known quite a few ladies like this. They can introduce you to their parents but when you have been around for a while you find that their parents are not their REAL parents but two older people they like to call Mummy and Daddy and whom they drop a few baht to from time to time. Or they may be the real parents and they are not going to say anything to anyone about a previous or other boyfriend.

 

If you don't want to meet players, move away from Pattaya. You can have the same lifestyle in other parts of Thailand. Yes, you can meet players in all parts of Thailand but in Pattaya they cluster like moths to the flame.

 

There is another way of looking at all of this - I know an older gent who is loaded with money and just does not care. He has a different girl in each town and when he is in town his girl from there will stay with him. He pays up a certain amount to deal with the herds of sick buffalos and crowds of undereducated younger brothers. He knows a lot more Thai than he lets on and can understand the gist of conversations and usually knows exactly what's what.

 

But he does not care - he never gets married (I think he claims to have a wife already who is disabled but still alive) and he has long ago had the snip and lets the girls know that so that no one tries to land a fatherless child on him. He just enjoys his time and does not let it get to him and takes each day one at a time. But he makes no plans, buys no houses, invests in no businesses etc, claiming to the girls that he lives on a relatively small fixed pension (which is a big fat lie!). He almost never has to kick the girl out for any reason - they usually buzz off once what they think is a better proposition comes along, which suits him just fine. Very soon, along comes a new one and life goes on.

[bkofbkk]

I got as far as "This thai girl..." 

 

The only story beginning more common is "Once upon a time ..."

 

 

[1FinickyOne]

What your missing is this - - it sounds like you are playing her... seen it many times here. You don't work for free. 

 

At least have some compassion. She is a poor girl. You claim to be a rich guy. Help her out a little if you care about her,... if you don't, then let her find someone who will take care of her... 

[Bundooman]

15 hours ago, samsensam said:

 

who are '

 

who are ' these girls'?; do you mean lower class, lower educated girls working in, or on the edge of, the sex industry? or are you generalising that all thai girls need money?

 

i dont understand the bubble that some foreigners live in here, they don't seem to know anything about thailand, thais or thai culture.

 

every thai girl/woman i have dated has had an education, a career, an apartment, usually a car or even two, plenty of money and they certainly didnt date me for financial gain. this is not boastfulness, this is, for me, normality and it makes me a normal person - it doesn't make me 'ignorant or having a self-satiating attitude'.

 

 

"every thai girl/woman i have dated has had a...…"  "it doesn't make me 'ignorant or having a self-satiating attitude'."

 

Yes, actually, it does.