Thai lady / girlfriend, is she? maybe?

[sanemax]

Just now, BritManToo said:

I met a girl with a cheap old nokia not-smart phone.

I said why no smart phone, and she said bf make video calls if I have it with me, so I leave it at home.

A bit later in my room, he called while she was on top, she answered without hesitation. Seemed to be Japanese. 

How much did she charge you ?

[Kadilo]

46 minutes ago, Kenny202 said:

 

 

Read Private Dancer, a book by Stephen Leather. You can download it free from the internet in PDF form. It is a must for anyone contemplating a relationship with a bar girl. I am sure many lights will come on as will many alarm bells start ringing

Say no more. Virtually everything you have said has come out of that pile of dog <deleted>. 

That’s not to say some of it may not be true but st least live a bit and form your own opinion as opposed to quoting crap from a novel. 

Edited March 6, 2019 by Kadilo

[Kenny202]

On 3/2/2019 at 3:39 AM, Jack19290 said:

Some harsh replies. I'm new so don't know how to comment like you done but I'll do my best.

 

I met her in a club, not the bar she works at.

 

She is 24 and I am 27, we are similar of age and I am not bad looking might I just say lol

 

I mean it sounds like she was there only 23 days due to the messages and fb and she showed me her flight ticket. 

 

I never look at people's message I just wanted to see her phone and check her messages to see if she really did come 23 days ago to phuket.

 

She hated the air con in my room, we never had it on. Long game? You could be right, most likely are right. When we went clubbing her drinks were free and she use to pay her own motorbike taxi to go home to get changed and stuff.

 

When we face time I can see the whole room, I mean if the guys there he would have to go out of his way to hide like a idiot, would you do that?

 

What happens if she still doesn't ask for money after 10 or 30 days? I mean I won't send her none anyway. Let's give an example she doesn't ask for money and if she does I don't send none but we still chat and have fun.

 

So what is this?

Mate I wish I could go back and dig up similar posts I had made years ago. Asking all of the same questions. Anyone could tell that your are already suspicious and I am sure you have seen things that concern you already. I like you chose to ignore the 50 posts that said run forest run, and focus on the one or two who regaled tales of happy long relationships with bargirls. I am sure it happens but so does winning the lottery. The odds are way against you. The fact she is in a bar is all the evidence you need really. A girl with any sort of good character good heart etc wouldn't dream of being there. Keep your head. If you want a real relationship with a Thai girl don't go looking in the trash can. If you only plan to come here on holidays root em and boot em. I just don't see the sense in paying them monthly allowances to see them and they're yours for 2 weeks. It worse than time share

[Kenny202]

8 minutes ago, Kadilo said:

Say no more. Virtually everything you have said has come out of that pile of dog <deleted>. 

That’s not to say some of it may not be true but st least live a bit and form your own opinion as opposed to quoting crap from a novel. 

Anything I have said was from my own experience coming here 8 years, living here 5 and a 5 year relationship with a bar girl and many other relationships with Thai women of different ages. I have lived in 2 major cities and 3 villages. I don't pretend to know it all but I certainly don't need to quote from a book, nor did I

[Kadilo]

Just now, Kenny202 said:

Anything I have said was from my own experience coming here 8 years, living here 5 and a 5 year relationship with a bar girl and many other relationships with Thai women of different ages. I have lived in 2 major cities and 3 villages. I don't pretend to know it all but I certainly don't need to quote from a book, nor did I

You got screwed over by one so now they are all the same. Typical attitude consistent on here by the bitter and twisted brigade. Nothing new. 

There are people on here who have been happily married to bar girls, massage girls etc for many years (not me before you come back with that one) so it is not only disrespectful, but wrong to suggest they all end in disaster. 

 

I’m sure  there are some more cliches you can add out of the book that you may have missed. 

 

How old old is that book btw that some people seem to worship? 

[Spidey]

2 minutes ago, Kadilo said:

You got screwed over by one so now they are all the same. Typical attitude consistent on here by the bitter and twisted brigade. Nothing new. 

There are people on here who have been happily married to bar girls, massage girls etc for many years (not me before you come back with that one) so it is not only disrespectful, but wrong to suggest they all end in disaster. 

 

I’m sure  there are some more cliches you can add out of the book that you may have missed. 

 

How old old is that book btw that some people seem to worship? 

Early 2000s I think, maybe 2005. I have a similar back story to @Kenny202 but a completely different experience. Read the book and, as labelled on the bookshelves, a complete work of fiction. Far removed from reality.

 

The reality is as you posted, you should have written the book!

[Kenny202]

You got screwed over by one so now they are all the same. Typical attitude consistent on here by the bitter and twisted brigade. Nothing new. 

There are people on here who have been happily married to bar girls, massage girls etc for many years (not me before you come back with that one) so it is not only disrespectful, but wrong to suggest they all end in disaster. 

 

I’m sure  there are some more cliches you can add out of the book that you may have missed. 

 

How old old is that book btw that some people seem to worship? 

When I see posts like this, clearly a newbie and a potential lamb to the slaughter, I always try to give calm objective advice rather than the normal all Thai women are no good stuff. Your post is just aggressive rhetoric, straight out of the blocks. Who says I am bitter and twisted? I was lucky enough to keep my head and not get cleaned out as so many do. I have a great life here now I have sorted it all out. Even getting left with a child from the relationship who has become the joy of my life. And my experience was far far worse than anything you would read in that book. This poor guy obviously doesn't have a clue. You can't seriously be suggesting a bar is a great starting place to look for a woman in Thailand. I wouldn't say they all end in disaster. From my experience I can say most do. Do you know any bar owners? I know 3. Ask them what they think as far as farang / bar girl relationships. I know one relationship with a farang and a bar girl which has worked for many years...but they have very different lives, have nothing really in common and he has plenty of money and continues to kick the tin, And more power too him if he is happy to do it. 

My references to the book are the things like the Thai boyfriend in the back ground, the constant lies (mainly lying to yourself), the phone battery dead not answering the phone at night, the trips up country where there will probably be another Thai boyfriend. The whole entitled expectation of the girl that having a "farang" is akin to winning the lottery and all it entails. This by the way isn't an expectation of only bar girls. Think or say what you like but at least give the guy some decent advice. Saying they're not all bad in the bars is like asking him to stick his hand in the toilet and find a diamond. Life with a normal Thai girl is difficult enough what with the cultural differences, lack of education etc. Throw that in with all the baggage she will have from the bar and her upbringing...

 

You point out your not married to a bar girl? On what basis are you giving advice or discreditting others advice?

 

 

[BritManToo]

21 minutes ago, Kenny202 said:

When I see posts like this, clearly a newbie and a potential lamb to the slaughter, I always try to give calm objective advice rather than the normal all Thai women are no good stuff.

Nobody ever listens, they all know better, and all know we are bitter and twisted.

Better to just let them do it, then laugh when they post the 'girl done me wrong' story later.

 

There's been a couple of 'I thought mine was different' posters writing their 'disaster' stories in the last few months.

One of the current 'my girl is different' posters asked how to protect his assets overseas this week, without admitting anything. Looks like he's in the end game.

 

PS. My bar girl wife didn't take anything from me, just left because she was bored of not being banged by five different guys every night. I got the house, my son, her daughter, and her mother is staying at the moment to visit the local hospital and see her grandkids.

Edited March 6, 2019 by BritManToo

[roo860]

https://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-398630/Brit-killed-barbecued-split-Thai-bride.html

This guy was a friend of mine down in Hua Hin.
What a gruesome end.

Sent from my SM-G920F using Thailand Forum - Thaivisa mobile app

[Kenny202]

25 minutes ago, BritManToo said:

Nobody ever listens, they all know better, and all know we are bitter and twisted.

Better to just let them do it, then laugh when they post the 'girl done me wrong' story later.

 

There's been a couple of 'I thought mine was different' posters writing their 'disaster' stories in the last few months.

One of the current 'my girl is different' posters  asked how to protect his assets overseas this week, without admitting anything. Looks like he's in the end game.

 

PS. My bar girl wife didn't take anything from me, just left because she was bored of not being banged by five different guys every night. I got the house, my son, her daughter, and her mother is staying at the moment to visit the local hospital and see her grandkids.

Good on you for looking after the kids and doing the right thing. Probably less trouble than their mother was 5555.

 

Too many blokes on here though that are bitter and twisted and tell blokes they're stupid etc, when the poor guy is only repeating the same mistakes they themselves and many of us have made. Most will not listen I agree. These girls are good at what they do there is no denying it. I always used to say I knew mine for 3 years before she showed her true colours. It was only then the true psycho emerged. I came here to visit mine for a year, then she came to live with me back home for 2 years before I decided to move here permanently with her. The next three years were a nightmare. By this time you have invested so much financially and emotionally into them it is hard to turn around and admit to yourself you were wrong. I was lucky. Some aren't and lose everything.

 

I must correct a previous comment I made too. I do know 3 other farang bar girl relationships where there has been some longevity. In all cases the men are miserable. All 3 of them invested everything they had into Thai women. One sits at home all day, has no life whatsoever. He has nothing more than a measly pension. House everything in the wife's name. She gets up about 5am...off to her mothers house and eats with the family.... then just does whatever it is she does in the day. She returns home about 9 at night. He has no choice but to toe the line. Other guys wife simply stays in the bedroom all day. She has a laptop and a TV in there. Never helps in the house etc. Buys food, back home to eat in the bedroom where the dishes pile up for a week. He has moved out of the bedroom and they are totally estranged. he is in a similar financial predicament and also has to toe the line. All are nearing their 70's and will die in misery. I guess at least the wife has had the decency not to throw them out. I have similarly seen guys here too who thought having a Thai wife meant they could go out boozing in bars every night, start drinking 9am in the morning etc. Who would blame that girl for grabbing what she could and running.

 

One thing I will never do...put myself in that position no matter how long I am with a girl here...whether she is a bargirl or not. Got some very good advice here once...Thais are opportunists.....the trick is do not give them opportunities. 

 

 

Edited March 6, 2019 by Kenny202

[Hummin]

11 minutes ago, Kenny202 said:

Good on you for looking after the kids and doing the right thing. Probably less trouble than their mother was 5555.

 

Too many blokes on here though that are bitter and twisted and tell blokes they're stupid etc, when the poor guy is only repeating the same mistakes they themselves and many of us have made. Most will not listen I agree. These girls are good at what they do there is no denying it. I always used to say I knew mine for 3 years before she showed her true colours. It was only then the true psycho emerged. I came here to visit mine for a year, then she came to live with me back home for 2 years before I decided to move here permanently with her. The next three years were a nightmare. By this time you have invested so much financially and emotionally into them it is hard to turn around and admit to yourself you were wrong. I was lucky. Some aren't and lose everything.

 

I must correct a previous comment I made too. I do know 3 other farang bar girl relationships where there has been some longevity. In all cases the men are miserable. All 3 of them invested everything they had into Thai women. One sits at home all day, has no life whatsoever. He has nothing more than a measly pension. House everything in the wife's name. She gets up about 5am...off to her mothers house and eats with the family.... then just does whatever it is she does in the day. She returns home about 9 at night. He has no choice but to toe the line. Other guys wife simply stays in the bedroom all day. She has a laptop and a TV in there. Never helps in the house etc. Buys food, back home to eat in the bedroom where the dishes pile up for a week. He has moved out of the bedroom and they are totally estranged. he is in a similar financial predicament and also has to toe the line. All are nearing their 70's and will die in misery. I guess at least the wife has had the decency not to throw them out. I have similarly seen guys here too who thought having a Thai wife meant they could go out boozing in bars every night, start drinking 9am in the morning etc. Who would blame that girl for grabbing what she could and running.

 

One thing I will never do...put myself in that position no matter how long I am with a girl here...whether she is a bargirl or not. Got some very good advice here once...Thais are opportunists.....the trick is do not give them opportunities. 

 

 

And again, who can blaim the women? 

 

The guys is in their 70’ies, living as a hostage? How old is the women? What hostage life do they have? 

 

Again, some common sense we all have to execute. I do mistakes to, but so far I can live with them, and move on! 

 

There is no shortcuts to a good life in paradise! 

[BritManToo]

1 hour ago, Kenny202 said:

One sits at home all day, has no life whatsoever. He has nothing more than a measly pension.

I think that's me, but let's face it what do you expect to do in your 60s apart from sit at home, watch TV and a bit of drinking and gardening?

[Hummin]

17 minutes ago, BritManToo said:

I think that's me, but let's face it what do you expect to do in your 60s apart from sit at home, watch TV and a bit of drinking and gardening?

Take my girl for a spin on the motorbike, go hiking, swimming in the ocean at an island, go almost daily to the gym, go diving, bicycle, take care of the small land we got, and make love! Drink less and less until I reach my 60’ies is my plan, so the drinking i let others do! 

 

What expectations do you really have? Everybody have to adjust to their age by considering what is good for us, and how to make a happy life! 

 

Good food, romantic and a colorful life inside outside! Dam, how black and white some manage to make it

[bkk6060]

26 minutes ago, BritManToo said:

I think that's me, but let's face it what do you expect to do in your 60s apart from sit at home, watch TV and a bit of drinking and gardening?

Go for a hike, play golf, go to the gym, walk the malls go to the movie, go for a swim, have lots sex, travel, eat great food, on and on.  60' s are the golden years plenty of time and money that was saved over the past 40 years.

These are actually the best years of my life.

Your comments sound to me like a person who has given up on life.  Seems like a sad waste..  

 

Edited March 6, 2019 by bkk6060

[BritManToo]

5 minutes ago, bkk6060 said:

have lots sex, travel, eat great food, on and on. 

Taken yours and Hummin's advice.

Booked a flight to HCMC next month (new 90 day non-o), then a bus to Phnom Penh from there.

I'll probably just waste the time drinking gallons of Saigon Green followed by even more Angkor draft.

Edited March 6, 2019 by BritManToo

[Hummin]

6 minutes ago, BritManToo said:

Taken yours and Hummin's advice.

Booked a flight to HCMC next month (new 90 day non-o), then a bus to Phnom Penh from there.

I'll probably just waste the time drinking gallons of Saigon Green followed by even more Angkor draft.

Somebody got to do it ????

 

 

 

[Xavnel]

Hmmm...  I wonder...

OP

How many "loads" has this girl relieved in the time it has taken this post to get to 24 pages while you "contemplate"?

 

[HLover]

6 minutes ago, Xavnel said:

Hmmm...  I wonder...

OP

How many "loads" has this girl relieved in the time it has taken this post to get to 24 pages while you "contemplate"?

 

Same number as him, one could guess.

[Kadilo]

5 hours ago, Spidey said:

Early 2000s I think, maybe 2005. I have a similar back story to @Kenny202 but a completely different experience. Read the book and, as labelled on the bookshelves, a complete work of fiction. Far removed from reality.

 

The reality is as you posted, you should have written the book!

I could and so could many people as there’s are always people around who want to believe that what may have happened to them is somehow the norm for everyone. At the end of the day it’s someone’s “story”

[CharlieH]

Off topic/crude/troll posts removed.

[PAWNEESE]

2 guys in 23 days. It must be a very quiet bar or she fussy who she "talks" to or she is outshone by others in her bar.

 

To be fair .. Ive got the impression somehow that the culture is parents got to be taken care of.  They dont be nice to men for drugs it is to take care mamma and pappa.  Lucky for us older falang.

 

This guy is gonna get burned .. I would advise against the sending money thing.

 

One girl I knew had 4 sending her money each month. 

 

Another had a scheduled phone call from her American friend sending her 50,000 a month ... not to work in a bar ... whilst I was having my fun. Cant say more on a family forum.

 

Apologies if you the one who phoned at midnight every night to check on her. 

 

 

 

Edited March 6, 2019 by PAWNEESE

[Jack19290]

Thanks for all the comments.

 

I have a friend in patong, an Australian man. He is out there currently and tried it with her last night, he offered her 10k baht for the night, which she kindly declined. 

 

It was my idea, she doesn't know we are friends or that we know each other. I just wanted to see what she would say. Lucky me I suppose.

 

He is in his late 30's and in good shape, before people assume he is old and fat.

 

Anyway, she still hasn't asked any money from me, yet.

 

She is also video chatting me 3-4 times a day.

 

Even before she goes to sleep, she stays with a friend (girl) so I see the friend asleep on the bed beside her, normally around 3am when she gets in from the club.

 

Last 2 nights she didn't go out, we FaceTimed for quite a while during the night.

 

So far so good, i am just trying to get her to undo all her privacy on Facebook for me so I can see everything, I am limited like all of her other friends I guess lol

 

I'll keep everyone updated, thanks for all the replies, I appreciate it.

Edited March 6, 2019 by Jack19290

[AlexRich]

13 minutes ago, Jack19290 said:

Thanks for all the comments.

 

I have a friend in patong, an Australian man. He is out there currently and tried it with her last night, he offered her 10k baht for the night, which she kindly declined. 

 

It was my idea, she doesn't know we are friends or that we know each other. I just wanted to see what she would say. Lucky me I suppose.

 

He is in his late 30's and in good shape, before people assume he is old and fat.

 

Anyway, she still hasn't asked any money from me, yet.

 

She is also video chatting me 3-4 times a day.

 

Even before she goes to sleep, she stays with a friend (girl) so I see the friend asleep on the bed beside her, normally around 3am when she gets in from the club.

 

Last 2 nights she didn't go out, we FaceTimed for quite a while during the night.

 

So far so good, i am just trying to get her to undo all her privacy on Facebook for me so I can see everything, I am limited like all of her other friends I guess lol

 

I'll keep everyone updated, thanks for all the replies, I appreciate it.

 

You might want to send a Tom in to have a go? Some of those little boy band lookalikes pull nice Thai birds.

 

 

[Jack19290]

10 minutes ago, AlexRich said:

 

You might want to send a Tom in to have a go? Some of those little boy band lookalikes pull nice Thai birds.

 

 

I don't know what that means?

 

If anyone can get this girl then I will pernoanlly pay them what he got charged lol

 

I'll be in patong at the end of May, 2 months from now.

 

Also it obviously has to be a reasonable amount, like 5k baht, anything more and that said person would have to cough it up lol 

[thaibeachlovers]

On ‎3‎/‎2‎/‎2019 at 6:16 PM, iahtml said:

You seem to be a very nice person. From my perspective, not every girl working in a bar is bad. Some just want money from the easiest way. Some are in need. Sometimes, you don't have many choices in live.

The girl you are talking about sounds like an ok one - if her story is true. That needs to be proved.

She may or may not ask for money later. Most poor, uneducated Thai girls think all Farangs are rich.

How about you try asking her to change a job and see how she reacts?

One more way I think will work is that you tell her you get fired and broke, and see her response.

Back in my younger days, I "met" many bargirls and the nice ones far outweighed those with a heart of stone that were just in it for the money.

Most I knew did it to make a living while having fun, and a couple of weeks with me at the beach was a pleasant diversion from their usual occupation of touting at the bar and putting up with some drunken sot doing the biz for 5 minutes and falling asleep after.

Most of the girls I went out with had vanished the next time I went back- to a better job, got married, went home; I know not what or where.

One of my Thai "girlfriends" was in her 30s, had a couple of kids, and preferred working in a bar to working on a building site, which was probably her only other option, other than being a maid or working in a sweat shop, neither of which option I'd wish on even an enemy.

[thaibeachlovers]

49 minutes ago, Jack19290 said:

I have a friend in patong, an Australian man. He is out there currently and tried it with her last night, he offered her 10k baht for the night, which she kindly declined. 

Either your friend is telling porkies, or you really need to find out how she is getting money to live. Tips and ladydrinks won't keep anyone alive, let alone support her family.

[Skallywag]

1 hour ago, AlexRich said:

He is out there currently and tried it with her last night, he offered her 10k baht for the night, which she kindly declined. 

 

1 hour ago, AlexRich said:

She is also video chatting me 3-4 times a day.

 

Your friend "offered" 10k?  In my limited "bar" experience, 5K is the most any woman ever asked and that was a 19 year old absolute model quality stunner at a go go. Also, I have never "offered" only inquired, then negotiated or not from there if interested. 

 

Cannot understand why a bar owner would employ a 24 year old woman who refuses to be barfined/go out with a customer. 

 

Your OP says she speaks basically no English "2%" so how are you chatting 3-4 times a day?  Facetime is a video app, not a texting app where you can use your google translate.

 

And as thaibeachlover pointed out above - How is she surviving in phuket on tips and drinks .   

 

mai pen rai, interesting read and comments

Edited March 6, 2019 by Skallywag
grammer

[Kadilo]

2 hours ago, thaibeachlovers said:

Either your friend is telling porkies, or.....

......someone is. 

[tingtongtourist]

If she asks for money I will drop her as quick as I picked her up.

 

I get what you mean, but surely you know to be involved with any female anywhere means laying out big $????

 

In the west they dont 'ask' because its obvious how soon will come many things you 'need' when you are together.

 

if have kids, it really is the end of your easy life!

in no time you become the prisoner to debt, working til age 70 and even then still owe money.

 

These girls are different. most do what they do because they have to, because theres no other way of making money and no easy welfare payments.

 

so dont be kee-niow, give them a bit of the surplus $ so little you wont even miss it.

It usually goes to family, food and neccesitys after all.. not a yacht in Accapulco and holidays in the south of France.

 

and to the lowlifes on this site constantly calling them whores

you can pull your heads in...

 

You dont think you have been a whore ALL your life?...

The bank is your pimp and Xcorp who you work for has fบcked you the whole time.

[Xavnel]

I was sceptical before..  but now after his last comments, I believe thd OP is a Troll or just straight a Liar.

Everything about his story keeps changing... 

He will only send her 10K a month, no more...  then maybe 20K,...  tben 30K is the maximum he could afford...  last was the ante was raised to 40K.

He said he would send the girl's info to that guy as s "challenge"... butobviously never did.  Now... his "Australian Friend" offered her 10K and she refused.. I call Bullsh... on that right there...  especially if she came from the poor Issan farms.. 10K

 

I was reading for some entertainment...  but I am done with this Troll as it is clearly a total waste of time and everything is an outright LIE.