At 70 years old I’m looking for the antidote – Do you have it?

[geronimo]

My advice is to live for each day and forget all this shit about getting old, It will happen, by why stress yourself over it?

 

I'm only 63 and never give old age a thought, I'd rather deal with it when it comes.

 

Death is nature's way of saying "slow down"

[Chazar]

4 hours ago, DaRoadrunner said:

An old Chinaman told me the secret of longevity. He said, "get a young girl in your bed.".... I did, and it nearly killed me. At least I shall die happy.

A  young  girl told me the secret in bed once , never  listen to  an old  China man

[soalbundy]

11 hours ago, Whip Me Granny said:

Your opening description sounds a lot like the beginning in my first post . As for being clinically depressed I will have to look that up ????. As you are the same age as myself can I ask you this question . 

 

At night when you go to bed and lay your head on the pillow do you ever think to your self , I wonder if I’m going to wake up in the morning . I know I constantly think that thought when I turn in .

 

 

 

 

 

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555555 that reminds me of my deceased father, at 83 he used to wake up in the morning and laugh saying to my mother "Oh look, we are still here''. After his first heart attack, he moaned at the paramedics who had saved him "why did you do that, I was having a wonderful time" so I presume that he had an NDE although he never spoke about it.

[geronimo]

The conscious mind is like a naughty monkey and everyone needs to learn how to tie it to a tree at nights,

[BritManToo]

11 hours ago, Whip Me Granny said:

I wonder what your wife thinks when she turns over to look at you with your head on the pillow , can you guess what she would be thinking now 20 years later ????

Dunno about Marcus, but in 20 years time if I'm still around, it'll be a different woman cos the existing girl will be too old for me by then.

Edited June 27, 2019 by BritManToo

[ignis]

16 hours ago, GarryP said:

Genetics certainly play an important role. Developed lactose intolerance, have the same allergies, developing BPH, all just like my dad and his brothers. I also look younger than my age, just like my dad and his bro's. With the exception of one brother, all his other brothers and one sister are still relatively fine and active, between 84 and and 94 years old. On my mum's side all her brothers lived into their 80's (some still alive). So genetically I have positives.  Hopefully, having given up smoking 10 years ago, it will not have shortened my life too much. 

Maybe for some........ in my case then I should have gone a few years ago.. even younger Cousins are no longer here.

[owenm]

Mortal or immortality. How long is a piece of string? No one really knows if they'll reach a ripe old age, ailment free or if they'll succumb to some life threatening illness while still younger in life. 

 

I'm 60, and at 54 developed Legionnaires Disease and Pneumonia from a contaminated BKK aircond system, diagnosed 10 days after arriving back in Melbourne after a holiday here seeing my ex-in laws. I was literally on death's door, and after 4 days in ICU was told that they predicated that I only had about a 10% chance of survival because of a compromised immune system due to having a chronic rheumatoid arthritis condition.

 

If being in hospital a few days later, or not initially diagnosing the legionella?? Who knows?? Three weeks in hospital and 3 mths off work recovering. 

 

This gave me a new lease on life, a second chance. My RA was very aggressive in a variable climate like Melbourne and was like an invalid in many ways with mobility issues. I made the decision to move to Thailand 4 years ago, my RA feels like it is almost in remission, but the truth is the warmer climate was reducing the symptoms dramatically. Still taking my daily meds and monthly injections. 

 

I'm now living life to the fullest and taking one day at a time, and not dwelling on the thought of how long I have left on this earth. Whether it be 5, 10 or 20 years, or knocked down by a bus tomorrow.. Who knows, who really cares. I have enjoyed life to the fullest, travelled about 45 countries, worked and lived in Oz, UK and Canada. Life is short for us all, make everyday count and enjoy life to the fullest.. 

[geronimo]

1 minute ago, owenm said:

Mortal or immortality. How long is a piece of string? No one really knows if they'll reach a ripe old age, ailment free or if they'll succumb to some life threatening illness while still younger in life. 

 

I'm 60, and at 54 developed Legionnaires Disease and Pneumonia from a contaminated BKK aircond system, diagnosed 10 days after arriving back in Melbourne after a holiday here seeing my ex-in laws. I was literally on death's door, and after 4 days in ICU was told that they predicated that I only had about a 10% chance of survival because of a compromised immune system due to having a chronic rheumatoid arthritis condition.

 

If being in hospital a few days later, or not initially diagnosing the legionella?? Who knows?? Three weeks in hospital and 3 mths off work recovering. 

 

This gave me a new lease on life, a second chance. My RA was very aggressive in a variable climate like Melbourne and was like an invalid in many ways with mobility issues. I made the decision to move to Thailand 4 years ago, my RA feels like it is almost in remission, but the truth is the warmer climate was reducing the symptoms dramatically. Still taking my daily meds and monthly injections. 

 

I'm now living life to the fullest and taking one day at a time, and not dwelling on the thought of how long I have left on this earth. Whether it be 5, 10 or 20 years, or knocked down by a bus tomorrow.. Who knows, who really cares. I have enjoyed life to the fullest, travelled about 45 countries, worked and lived in Oz, UK and Canada. Life is short for us all, make everyday count and enjoy life to the fullest.. 

Kudos to you Sir!!!

[AgMech Cowboy]

On 6/25/2019 at 10:05 PM, marcusarelus said:

I don't like the criticism that writing brings.  One of my children says something or posts something on facebook incredibly stupid and I no longer even comment.  Why start a fight.  My wife does something outrageous and I just blow it off. 

Really good advise. I think a lot the same. Maybe I'll quit FB and TV. 

[Skallywag]

 

11 hours ago, kevvy said:

Act your age and accept getting old gracefully.........be as happy, silly,crazy, and excited as you want to be until the day you die.

Are you not contradicting yourself,   55 

 

11 hours ago, kevvy said:

I have many friends at my local church and have fun with all ages

Can you tell me which "local church" in Bangkok you attend.  May start attending one, have only googled near me and only one Baptist church, not interested in their doctrine 

[kevvy]

1 hour ago, Skallywag said:

 

Are you not contradicting yourself,   55 

 

Can you tell me which "local church" in Bangkok you attend.  May start attending one, have only googled near me and only one Baptist church, not interested in their doctrine 

sorry mate I am in Chiang Rai .

[elgenon]

Read The Economist. Psilocybin has been shown to "reduce the anxiety that so often afflicts people when they are approaching death". More than 1 way to take a trip. Of course can only do where legal. Legality is spreading quickly.

[Lacessit]

16 hours ago, Whip Me Granny said:

My dear wife some times calls me Panda Eyes , for a long time now Ive noticed that I have dark looking circles under the eyes , and when I go to bed that's when my mind goes into full overdrive . I just can't seem to stop thinking all sorts of negative things. ????

 

 

 

.

That is the classic path to depression. Your mind is fully active and going around in circles, disrupting normal sleep.

Seek medical help. Tricyclic anti-depressants have been around for a long time. The dose is built up gradually over months, and one comes off them the same way. I stayed on them  for decades. The only side effect I had on the highest dosage was not giving a shit about anything. As I said in another post, I now use drowsy antihistamines instead.

[rickudon]

Apart from a couple of minor health scares back in my 40's, I was fairly healthy until I was nearly 65. Then had symptoms of pancreatitis (not usually good!) and mortality did stare me in the face. Main thoughts of how unfair it was as I was about to start drawing my state pension and would at last be able to stop penny pinching so as to lie within my means.

 

Luckily I recovered 95% but now have another possible issue  - skin cancer. Caught early and still waiting for final diagnosis (already removed) but of course survival not guaranteed. This time I have been more philosophical about it. I f I only have a couple of years left, so be it. I just need another couple of years to ensure my children are provided for.

 

Apart from that, I have my hobbies, never bored, I know I have more to do than I will ever have time for.

[Small Joke]

I nearly died at 56 from Pneumonia with complications. 18 months on, thoughts of death are with me, I actually have advanced plans to euthanase if I get cancer or some other wasting disease, but that close shave taught me, plans are futile. I remember not being scared, just resigned and peeved I'd die in a bloody hospital bed! That surprised me.

I am relatively healthy now, although my near daily drinking and weekly burger habit are foolish, but I'm a dead man walking anyway. We all are, really.

Take a page out of the sayings of the twelve step groups.

'One day at a time' the worry and troubles of one day are manageable, thinking ahead is not so much help.

Also gratitude, look in the mirror every day and be grateful for everything you are, you experienced, and have.

Plan some bucket list stuff, it doesn't need to be epic.

Maybe a book you always wanted to read, a bottle of fantastic wine you've denied yourself. 

Is there a person you need to apologise to? Do it! Make amends where you can, it's not for them, it's for you!

Make your peace with those who've wronged you if possible.

The simple stuff can be extremely powerful. 

Even consider a structured mindfulness retreat, learn daily meditation, or supercharge it and go on a guided psychedelic tour of your mind. Magic mushrooms now legal/decrim in at least two location in the U.S. I believe Colorado and California.

Many many people have found deep and lasting peace and wisdom on a head trip of this kind, just do it where it's legal!

Good for you on reaching out, many will be helped reading all the support you been given here, the better side of T visa!

[soalbundy]

On 6/26/2019 at 9:56 PM, Whip Me Granny said:

Now you have brought up another topic that tends to start me biting my nails   , yes its the leave this world with out too much pain thought. I think like me every one here would want to go to sleep and just not wake up ever again ????

 

 

 

.

I think, with the right number of bank notes, even a Thai doctor would give you a never never land injection. When I was a child I remember a conversation between my mother and grandmother. My grandfather had been sent home to die with stomach cancer, the doctor came every day to give him morphine injections as he was not only starving to death he had intense pain. My grandmother asked the doctor to increase the dosage but he replied that he was already giving him the maximum allowed, anymore would kill him. My grandmother said she looked the doctor in the eyes and just raised her eyebrows, after a few seconds hesitation he nodded, an hour later my grandfather was dead.

[RichardColeman]

On 6/26/2019 at 12:29 AM, geoffbezoz said:

You are as old as you feel.  Very true saying for most people. Which is exactly why you should have a GF/wife at least 40 to 50 years younger than yourself. Then when you feel her you feel young ????????

I am 55, my wife is 41. When we lived in one of the gated villages in Pattaya, my neighbour was 72 and his wife 39. Maybe I got the bum deal on that one ! Comes to something when you wife is older than the next 72 year olds

[thaibeachlovers]

On ‎6‎/‎26‎/‎2019 at 3:41 AM, emptypockets said:

I think part of the problem is people retiring. After a lifetime of working suddenly a lot of things stop.

Work is much more than simply turning up and getting paid.

There is the social and spiritual aspect to work (not the god bothering spiritual type) but the good feeling for me spiritual thing - I feel valued thing. A sense of worth.

 

Men need 3,000 interactions a day (interactions meaning talking , phone calls etc etc) women need 5,000 interactions.  Did you ever wonder why you came home from work knackered and the wife just wanted to blah blah blah?... Now you know!!

 

I'm 63 and love the job I have in a country close to Thailand. See the wife every three weeks for two weeks or so.

Keeps me intellectually on the top of my game.

 

To the OP - find a challenge.....buy a telescope and try and find a new comet!

Download the Pacer app to your phone - try and walk 10,000 steps a day.

 

 

Keep your brain active after all it is the second most important male organ (joking)

I hated work, not the work itself but the morons that were my managers that made my life a misery. When I was working there was always some <deleted> making me stressed.

I love being retired- I'm busier than when I was working, but I do it at my own pace, not to the dictat of some petty dictator who is able to harass me. I love waking up when I wake up, get up when I feel like it, have a cup of tea when I want one, do nothing if I want, sit and watch the world go by if I want.

How do I avoid depression- Ignore most of the news, which is only about bad things- never about happy things. If the radio talk back makes me angry, I turn it off.

My "antidote", is to do something that stops me thinking about my life. I watch lots of DVDs, read, go on TVF and debate stuff, make things, write my diary. which can use up a half hour or so, I garden, and do odd jobs outside to keep active. Jigsaws are great for keeping the braincells working.

I try to not do things that allow me to think too much, as it always reverts to how old I feel, how many physical problems I have, how lonely I am, the bad things that happened to me in my life, etc.

 

The things I can't avoid are things that make me feel sad ( not depressed though ). A song on the radio will take me back to a happier time when I had a loving wife, a nice place to live, a purpose in life.

In a way, getting married was the worst thing to do. I was used to being alone, then I got married and life was way better than ever before, then I wasn't. and life is empty, meaningless, without purpose, just waiting to die. I feel sadder now because life was so good with someone else, and now I don't have anyone. All my old friends are far away or dead, I have no close family to visit, my parents are dead. My heroes are dead or nearly, the world I grew up in has vanished, young people are so selfish and inconsiderate now, greed rules the world, old people have no respect from the government.

 

[thaibeachlovers]

18 hours ago, Small Joke said:

I remember not being scared, just resigned and peeved I'd die in a bloody hospital bed!

Unfortunately, that's the only place we will get decent pain relief.

If the Drs ever send me home with a big bottle of morphine I know what I'm going to do.

[DILLIGAD]

Unfortunately, that's the only place we will get decent pain relief.
If the Drs ever send me home with a big bottle of morphine I know what I'm going to do.

Be thankful that you’ve got a home?


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

[thaibeachlovers]

2 minutes ago, DILLIGAD said:

Be thankful that you’ve got a home?


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

I don't. I rent. 

[DILLIGAD]

I don't. I rent. 

Me too


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

[potless]

On 6/26/2019 at 9:56 PM, Whip Me Granny said:

Now you have brought up another topic that tends to start me biting my nails   , yes its the leave this world with out too much pain thought. I think like me every one here would want to go to sleep and just not wake up ever again

I, for one, would prefer to have some notice of when my time is up. Make sure that all my affairs are in order, that sort of thing. But also to have friends gathered around so I could see the look on their faces as i say to each one in turn "can you please lend me 50,000 baht?" As i suggested to you before, pack your bags and go somewhere you havent been. Change of scene.

[giddyup]

1 hour ago, thaibeachlovers said:

Unfortunately, that's the only place we will get decent pain relief.

If the Drs ever send me home with a big bottle of morphine I know what I'm going to do.

They won't, at least not in Thailand.

[Whip Me Granny]

 

Thanks every one for your comments suggestions and ideas they are really all appreciated

 

So I now have a theory relating to my current state of mind .

 

Could it be that my ever present stress worry and nail biting anxiety brought on by constantly thinking that I may not have a lot of time left on earth is in fact being brought on and made worse by one simple factor . That simple factor is that I permanently reside in Thailand .

 

Just think about this ????

 

As resident expats we are constantly bombarded by endless immigration issues , the sinking exchange rates along with stressful health worries . Add to that mix the continuing daily negative Thai news that for me personally only make me feel down.

 

So here’s my theory , could it be that because I’m having to endlessly cope with all of the above negative issues that surround me in Thailand , my current fear about my time left on earth is only being made worse or even amplified just by having to think about and deal with all those above Thailand related negative issues on a never ending basis.

 

So I wonder how I would be feeling about my stress worry and anxiety , if I did not live in Thailand .

 

If tomorrow I boarded a flight back to England and continued my life there , I really wonder if my current dark cloak of stress worry and anxiety would be instantly lifted to reveal a more happy and contented stress free person . Who now freed from the shackles of life in Thailand would then be more able to come to terms with my mortality .

 

Do you think I may be on the right track? ????

 

 

 

 

 

.

 

[CharlieH]

Just now, Whip Me Granny said:

 

Thanks every one for your comments suggestions and ideas they are really all appreciated

 

So I now have a theory relating to my current state of mind .

 

Could it be that my ever present stress worry and nail biting anxiety brought on by constantly thinking that I may not have a lot of time left on earth is in fact being brought on and made worse by one simple factor . That simple factor is that I permanently reside in Thailand .

 

Just think about this ????

 

As resident expats we are constantly bombarded by endless immigration issues , the sinking exchange rates along with stressful health worries . Add to that mix the continuing daily negative Thai news that for me personally only make me feel down.

 

So here’s my theory , could it be that because I’m having to endlessly cope with all of the above negative issues that surround me in Thailand , my current fear about my time left on earth is only being made worse or even amplified just by having to think about and deal with all those above Thailand related negative issues on a never ending basis.

 

So I wonder how I would be feeling about my stress worry and anxiety , if I did not live in Thailand .

 

If tomorrow I boarded a flight back to England and continued my life there , I really wonder if my current dark cloak of stress worry and anxiety would be instantly lifted to reveal a more happy and contented stress free person . Who now freed from the shackles of life in Thailand would then be more able to come to terms with my mortality .

 

Do you think I may be on the right track? ????

 

 

 

 

 

.

 

No, because you are focussing on the negative all the time, you would just find a new set of negatives where ever you go. The simple fact is, wherever you go, you are there ! Its your attitude toward it that needs changing not your geography. 

[unblocktheplanet]

It's really not about whether our lives matter(ed). It's about who we matter to.

 

And also about our dear departed who have gone before. I have an address book of loved ones I can't bring myself to delete.

[elliss]

On 6/26/2019 at 6:29 AM, geoffbezoz said:

You are as old as you feel.  Very true saying for most people. Which is exactly why you should have a GF/wife at least 40 to 50 years younger than yourself. Then when you feel her you feel young ????????

 

Boredom ,  is a killer in Thailand ,  no purpose in your days. 

 I bought my self another Kindle , same old stories ..

 

Edited June 28, 2019 by elliss

[Jip99]

5 minutes ago, elliss said:

 

Boredom ,  is a killer in Thailand ,  no purpose in your days. 

 

 

 

I would revise that to “Boredom is a killer in retirement “.

 

 

The location is probably irrelevant.

[thaibeachlovers]

12 hours ago, giddyup said:

They won't, at least not in Thailand.

One of the reasons I felt it was time to leave LOS and go back home.