Pay it forward

[SidJames]

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BTbXjksvsbI

[sanuk711]

Completely and utterly off subject........just thought after reading Snow whites letters I needed a laugh...............

 

 

[papa al]

1 hour ago, mtflamingo said:

All I wanted to know was what was the right way to go about donating.  And I have learned that I am a horrible person for even asking this question.  I was trying to make sure I didn't break face with my donations and you have assured me that I what I am doing makes me a horrible person.  When all that I really wanted to know was that they ways that I was trying to help was beneficial to those around me.

Give money

and say "tip."

Smile.

[Dumbastheycome]

1 hour ago, mtflamingo said:

All I was wondering if what I was doing was breaking face.  If you know anything about the culture here you would know that is unacceptable. 

I can  see  that the way  you have put  your question has  raised  some ire .

I can understand that in basic terms  you are  not bragging your charity  but want to know if it contradicts the social perspective of  Thai.

IMO the answer would be no in  circumstances of  genuine need. Determining that  genuine need would be  the harder part of it.

Being  "privaleged"  to live in Thailand might be  better put as  "fortunate  enough"  to live in Thailand as  your personal perspective. That  might  avert the  perception  of those who consider Thailand being  privileged  with their presence for  reason known best to themselves.

As  to  who  you are charitable is a matter of your own choice. It would be rare for it not to be accepted but as to the question of face it would in IMO be as much a matter of individual circumstance .

 

 

 

 

[2 is 1]

1 hour ago, mtflamingo said:

No your totally right.  I lived in Thailand for 27 months making 6k bhat a month so I have so much to gain from this.  Unlike some I actually came over to help not to <deleted> desperate women who were so down on their luck they would marry the first white man to come to their village.

You can't rescue all! That include idiot farang ! If they get married that bargirl it's they problem! Should read even some txt from here coz even guys here make many jokes but they actually try help also to not make misstake! Many guys here have all the data from this coundry. But also dont make troll post! Respect and you get one back also. 

Sometimes i have idiot post , normaly about i like to be drunk once a week coz i want lol! And sorry for that.

I'm 47 and already retired! I have make good desitions in my life , not born gold spoon in my behind! Before i spend lots of time in Philippines , married 9 years whit Filipina! Personaly i like Thailand more even Philippines have good things also. 

Edited May 5, 2020 by 2 is 1

[saakura]

1 hour ago, mtflamingo said:

Well before all this when down the government was asking for help from America.  I was lucky to placed as a teacher trainer.  Working with native Thai teachers to become more proficient with teaching English

I think you should first enroll for English classes yourself before trying to teach the poor starving natives.

[Bob A Kneale]

11 hours ago, mtflamingo said:

12 hours ago, Bob A Kneale said:

Thank you for your service but after your living here for 4 years and being a "white saviour" giving that B600 per month for more than two of those years, how come you can't work out whether you're causing those you're helping so much to lose (break?) face?   This potential problem for them has only just occurred to you now?

 

How did the Thai government ask for your help, are you involved with an international charity?  It doesn't sound at all like something the government here would ever do.

Well before all this when down the government was asking for help from America.  I was lucky to placed as a teacher trainer.  Working with native Thai teachers to become more proficient with teaching English

What?  The Thai government was asking for English-language teaching assistance from the American government in return for B6,000 per month?  No, it wasn't...unless you have something to back that up in which case I'll apologise for getting you wrong. 

 

"Working with native Thai teachers to become more proficient with teaching English".

What sort of more proficient English have you been teaching that produces phrases such as "breaking face"?

[userabcd]

12 hours ago, mtflamingo said:

No your totally right.  I lived in Thailand for 27 months making 6k bhat a month so I have so much to gain from this.  Unlike some I actually came over to help not to <deleted> desperate women who were so down on their luck they would marry the first white man to come to their village.

If you are young, sure hope that you are seriously thinking of your future and retirement on 6000 baht a month.

Edited May 6, 2020 by userabcd

[Lacessit]

13 hours ago, Skallywag said:

I have been giving Baht, food, and love to select Thai ladies here for over 22 years.  (only retired here in 2018 though)

I will continue of course as I believe many of these Thai ladies support children, parents, or even a husband and/or boyfriend????????

I give until there is no more to give each and every month

It's rare to find a poster here with such altruistic motivations.

[Lacessit]

13 hours ago, mtflamingo said:

I have donated to many food banks in the city. I guess the white savior in me needs to know that just donating money isn't breaking face.  

While your charity may be commendable, it's ironic you can't recognize the racism in the term you use.

[Saltire]

Give stuff and money anonymously and quietly, and not to feel good when all your friends tell you how wonderful you are.

 

I looked after volunteers for 5 years and met lots of what we called badge volunteers. Look at me! This is not what philanthropy is about.

 

Today the village chief tannoyed about free hot food for all those struggling in the village and asked for donations of, not money, but cooking ingredients and rice. Nobody lost face when the wife donated sauce and salt.

 

You need to take a step back and re-evaluate your goal in helping.

 

 

[Lacessit]

11 hours ago, 2 is 1 said:

You can't rescue all! That include idiot farang ! If they get married that bargirl it's they problem! Should read even some txt from here coz even guys here make many jokes but they actually try help also to not make misstake! Many guys here have all the data from this coundry. But also dont make troll post! Respect and you get one back also. 

Sometimes i have idiot post , normaly about i like to be drunk once a week coz i want lol! And sorry for that.

I'm 47 and already retired! I have make good desitions in my life , not born gold spoon in my behind! Before i spend lots of time in Philippines , married 9 years whit Filipina! Personaly i like Thailand more even Philippines have good things also. 

Could I suggest one of your future good decisions might be investing in a spellchecker.

[Andrew Dwyer]

OP.

While your actions are commendable your choice of words are dubious, “ white saviour “ was a definite mistake.

You should have asked the question without listing your donations .

 

My recommendation now would be to ask for this thread to be closed and continue to help people around you without showboating.

[Mops59]

I help the people close to me. I give them a decent payment for jobs done like cleaning, gardening, etc

 I help them with their credit card loans with incredible interest rates. I give them all my old stuff like cloths, furniture, appliances and even motorbikes. I pay medical and dentist bills. Etc. Etc. And I give food to poor people living in wooden sheds along the railway during this time. And they don't turn it down. They are happy with it. And is it humiliating. Yes it is. But they want to feed themselves, their children and family. And every help is needed where a government is not able to build up a decent social support system without charity.

 

[Airalee]

13 hours ago, mtflamingo said:

All I wanted to know was what was the right way to go about donating. 

https://biblehub.com/matthew/6-3.htm

[BritManToo]

13 hours ago, mtflamingo said:

Oh yes the over 2 years of my life that I gave being a volunteer doesn't matter.  In case you were curios some people come here because the Thai government asks for their help.  But please assume that I am like all the others when really all I was asking for was guidance during these unprecedented times

I don't believe the Thai government has ever asked for a white foreigner's help.

Edited May 6, 2020 by BritManToo

[finnsk]

I am in the same speculations. How can I help.

 

I could invite help some of the bargirls to sleep in my bed, give them food and house and a 100 baht, when they do a good job, now they are without much work. Only one problem the mrs dont want me to help the nice and poor bargirls, how the thais can be so heartless ?

 

So how to help then ?

[Lacessit]

29 minutes ago, BritManToo said:

I don't believe the Thai government has ever asked for a white foreigner's help.

Cave rescue ring any bells?

[userabcd]

1 hour ago, Lacessit said:

Could I suggest one of your future good decisions might be investing in a spellchecker.

And by using the right idiom being "born with a silver spoon in (one's) mouth"

[Lacessit]

3 hours ago, userabcd said:

And by using the right idiom being "born with a silver spoon in (one's) mouth"

Actually, I think that choice was deliberate. Anal fixation, perhaps.

[mtflamingo]

20 hours ago, saakura said:

I think you should first enroll for English classes yourself before trying to teach the poor starving natives.

No you are completely right.  I only have a degree in K-8 education from one of the best colleges in the USA so really what would I know?

[mtflamingo]

9 hours ago, Bob A Kneale said:

What?  The Thai government was asking for English-language teaching assistance from the American government in return for B6,000 per month?  No, it wasn't...unless you have something to back that up in which case I'll apologise for getting you wrong. 

 

"Working with native Thai teachers to become more proficient with teaching English".

What sort of more proficient English have you been teaching that produces phrases such as "breaking face"?

All that I was trying to get across was the fact that I spent 2 years in a village in Norther Thailand.  You must not know much about the education in rural Thailand.  Seeing as you don't understand the teachers use EAL notebooks catered towards those who are immigrating to the EU.  My job was to help teachers with understanding that games and discussion can help promote an English understanding that isn't based on rote memorization.  I am more than welcome to share what I have learned in an in depth post if you would like.

[mtflamingo]

8 hours ago, BritManToo said:

I don't believe the Thai government has ever asked for a white foreigner's help.

Oh really then you haven't ever heard of Peace Corps which the Thai government asked for assistance back in 1962.

https://www.peacecorps.gov/thailand/

I mean that during the 2 years that I served the government of Thailand payed for my housing.  

[BritManToo]

Just now, mtflamingo said:

Oh really then you haven't ever heard of Peace Corps which the Thai government asked for assistance back in 1962.

https://www.peacecorps.gov/thailand/

I mean that during the 2 years that I served the government of Thailand payed for my housing.  

Ancient history before the Chinese took over.

[mtflamingo]

9 hours ago, Bob A Kneale said:

What?  The Thai government was asking for English-language teaching assistance from the American government in return for B6,000 per month?  No, it wasn't...unless you have something to back that up in which case I'll apologise for getting you wrong. 

 

"Working with native Thai teachers to become more proficient with teaching English".

What sort of more proficient English have you been teaching that produces phrases such as "breaking face"?

Here are the facts that I was telling you about:

https://www.peacecorps.gov/thailand/

 

All I was trying to elude to was that I had lived like a rural Thai person for over 2 years.  The closet 7/11 was over 35K away and the wooden songteaw that I took only ran on Monday and Thursday at 6am.  

 

[mtflamingo]

Just now, BritManToo said:

Ancient history before the Chinese took over.

I'm sorry I don't understand as I served from 2016-2018.  So please tell me more...

[mtflamingo]

22 hours ago, saakura said:

And why do you feel the need to boast about your donation? If you have donated, very good on you. Why blow a trumpet?

 

22 hours ago, saakura said:

Looks to me like you are trying to gain face by imagining that you are some kind of white angel come to save the poor starving natives with a gift of a 100 baht. "White Saviour", are you from the slavery era?

 

22 hours ago, scorecard said:

Agree, however also agree giving food is perhaps best, and a bigger bag where your aware there are kids or old folks maybe also needing food. 

 

9 hours ago, Saltire said:

Give stuff and money anonymously and quietly, and not to feel good when all your friends tell you how wonderful you are.

 

I looked after volunteers for 5 years and met lots of what we called badge volunteers. Look at me! This is not what philanthropy is about.

 

Today the village chief tannoyed about free hot food for all those struggling in the village and asked for donations of, not money, but cooking ingredients and rice. Nobody lost face when the wife donated sauce and salt.

 

You need to take a step back and re-evaluate your goal in helping.

 

 

I would love to know how.  I have donated money to the village that I served in and while I go back to visit every year I have been unable to this year.  

[mtflamingo]

9 hours ago, Andrew Dwyer said:

OP.

While your actions are commendable your choice of words are dubious, “ white saviour “ was a definite mistake.

You should have asked the question without listing your donations .

 

My recommendation now would be to ask for this thread to be closed and continue to help people around you without showboating.

Thank you for your kind words, but as a white American I have never been able to help without such horrible words being attached to me.  While I wish it wasn't true America loves to label those inside it. 

[473geo]

It really is quite easy to give money to Thai people, just fold it small and press it gently into their palm without fuss, they may well wai you thanks in return, and will not lose face as you have not made the act of giving a grand gesture.

 

You will have also learnt that those posters who could not even work out what sex you were from the word Female following 'Gender' under your avatar also turn out not to be the sharpest tools in the box when it comes to dispensing advice!!

 

Carry on being kind as you feel necessary, any sensible person can see you mean well, and as I say, as long as there is no big display on your part, face will not be broken, and your gift is more than likely well received.

 

 

 

[Bob A Kneale]

18 hours ago, mtflamingo said:

On 5/6/2020 at 8:50 AM, Bob A Kneale said:

What?  The Thai government was asking for English-language teaching assistance from the American government in return for B6,000 per month?  No, it wasn't...unless you have something to back that up in which case I'll apologise for getting you wrong. 

 

"Working with native Thai teachers to become more proficient with teaching English".

What sort of more proficient English have you been teaching that produces phrases such as "breaking face"?

All that I was trying to get across was the fact that I spent 2 years in a village in Norther Thailand.  You must not know much about the education in rural Thailand.  Seeing as you don't understand the teachers use EAL notebooks catered towards those who are immigrating to the EU.  My job was to help teachers with understanding that games and discussion can help promote an English understanding that isn't based on rote memorization.  I am more than welcome to share what I have learned in an in depth post if you would like.

I didn't think that you would be able to answer my question.  I asked about your false claim that "the Thai government asked the US government for assistance in English language teaching".  That did not happen.

 

"You must not know much about the education in rural Thailand [sic]"

It's probably best that you don't assume anything about what I know or don't know about education, in Thailand in particular, as my three children here can provide me with any additional knowledge if I need that assistance.

 

There's no need for you to "share in depth" anything that I haven't asked you about.

Edited May 7, 2020 by Bob A Kneale