How do Decent Thai women find Decent Expats in Thailand?

[Inspire Hua Hin]

 

My family and I have just spent a very enjoyable and relaxed weekend in Khao Yai. If you want to escape to nature in the mountains surrounded by stunning vegetation then this is the place to come.

 

Khao Yai is a 3-hour drive North East of the Capital and so is very popular with Bangkokians. We opted to camp and it was here we met three late twenty – early thirty-something Thai ladies who were also enjoying a weekend getaway too.

 

They were sitting outside their tent just next to us on Saturday evening and we got chatting. One of the girls asked if my wife and I wanted to join them for a drink, which we accepted.

 

The girls had come prepared with plenty of food and drink, which included – a little to my surprise – lots of alcohol from wine, cider, Malibu to even Tequila. My wife was in her element!

 

I could see my wife was taken back by the girl’s level of English and quality of conversation. She unfortunately has a little bit negative views of Thai women based on what she sees in Pattaya. Something I have told her is not reflective of Thai women in general, especially once you go to Bangkok.

 

The three girls were educated, attractive and had bundles of personality. My wife and I were being spoiled with food and drinks, in every aspect we were being treated to the warm Thai hospitality you often see here in Thailand.

 

The subject of boyfriends came up, my wife wanted to know where their partners were. None of the three girls had a boyfriend and explained it is almost impossible to find anyone decent.

 

All of the girls had been educated abroad and now had very good jobs in Bangkok. They said they did not want a Thai man as the family always got too involved in relationships – they also joked it was hard to find a straight decent Thai guy!

 

They all wanted a foreign boyfriend but said it is extremely difficult to find one in Bangkok. It surprised me somewhat is in Bangkok I know there is a younger expat demographic who work in the city. Why then is it so difficult to find a one?

 

The problem, they said, was meeting people now is often via apps like Tinder and Badoo. Here they are up against bar girls touting for business and also it was impossible to work out who are the good guys from those just looking for sex. Because there so many bar girls on these sites, they also get treated like the same, from the sex pest male just after one thing. “How much darling?” type comments are hardly the place decent, educated women want to go looking for a partner.

 

They made some good points about modern-day relationship hunting. Online relationship apps are based merely on physical attraction and look. How can anyone spot the person genuinely looking for a relationship and, I must add, a relationship with the right intentions? Plus when so much is based on just appearance, how can you spot the person with the same interests and outlooks as you?

 

These girls were not looking for a sugar daddy too. They wanted an equal partner. For foreigners many get sucked into the attraction of having a younger Thai girl, often from a bar, and immediately forfeit the ability to have quality and interesting conversation as the trade-off. Furthermore, however they want to dress it up, they end up paying for the relationship. I hear guys defend the monthly payment as no different to when a wife in the UK who gets the working husbands money to live. It is not the same and, in their guts, they know it.

 

Anyone whose relationship is first based on a transaction has to recognise the relationship is based on money and not a trusting, loving relationship. I have been there, got the T-Shirt, and so can speak from experience. I was never burnt financially as I wasn’t that careless – but I have certainly been in such relationships.

 

To read the rest of this blog by Dan about Thailand visit https://danaboutthailand.com/2020/07/20/how-do-decent-thai-women-find-decent-expats-in-thailand/

 

[rumak]

pretty long and somewhat boring advertisement

[twocatsmac]

Sure to bring out the “my bargirls different” crowd with this one.

[4MyEgo]

11 minutes ago, Inspire Hua Hin said:

These girls were not looking for a sugar daddy too.

Counts me out, too bad ????

 

[Pilotman]

Anecdotally, I would say that very few of the younger foreign men in Bangkok are what they are looking for. A lot are either nomads, so basically dropped out and looking for the easy life, teachers on a lowish salary that again just want an easy life in a nice tropical location and/or drifters, or tourists.  Certainly, international law firms, banks, large companies and investment houses have expats in Thailand that are young and on an 'expat package' and are usually high flyers, but finding them would be difficult for any Thai girl, unless they  are already moving in those circles and attend the same functions and social events, in other words, that they are wealthy Thais from a good family.  Their best bet is still social media, but here.  they will have to kiss an awful lot of frogs before a Prince appears.  

[Don Mega]

Tell em to flick me a PM and I'll give em me tinder name....Always on the look out for a bit of free tail.

[spiekerjozef]

Throw 1,000 baht bills in the air. As many as possible.

[mokwit]

7 minutes ago, rumak said:

pretty long and somewhat boring advertisement

The newly arrived expert? TLDR

[rumak]

me thinks old dan-about  is barking up the wrong forum .

 

sure to get a raised leg spray from us hardened criminals

[n00dle]

8 minutes ago, rumak said:

pretty long and somewhat boring advertisement

for what, while it does blather on endlessly spouting thailand dating cliches (the wife having a low opinion of thai women was a nice touch), i fail to see the product advertised, beyond the shamelss link to danaboutdrivel's advertising laden blog. 

[Airalee]

9 minutes ago, Inspire Hua Hin said:

The problem, they said, was meeting people now is often via apps like Tinder

That’s their first problem.  Tinder has always been known as a “hookup” app.  All the Thai women I know that have met quality guys online did so via Thaicupid.  Same for foreign guys.

 

11 minutes ago, Inspire Hua Hin said:

Online relationship apps are based merely on physical attraction and look. How can anyone spot the person genuinely looking for a relationship and, I must add, a relationship with the right intentions? Plus when so much is based on just appearance, how can you spot the person with the same interests and outlooks as you?

Physical attraction isn’t the only thing, but it cannot be discounted.  If they want to find someone with the same “interests and outlooks” they need to include those things in their profile.  Many...if not most...profiles of Thai women on the apps say absolutely nothing about themselves and the description areas of the profile are left blank or just say “ask me”.

 

They should also ask questions to their potential interests.  Many don’t show any interest beyond the basic “how long have you lived in Thailand”, “Have you had a Thai GF before” and “why do you want a Thai lady” type of questions.  Perhaps they should ask about someone’s opinions on various current events, what they like to do in their free time, hobbies etc.  Conversely, when someone asks them a question...answer it directly.  Years ago when I was on Thaicupid, I could ask the most innocuous question only to be met with a “why you want to know?” reply.

 

Beyond that, it’s a numbers game and one just needs to go with their gut feeling as to the sincerity of the person they are getting to know.

[rumak]

2 minutes ago, n00dle said:

i fail to see the product advertised, beyond the shamelss link to danaboutdrivel's advertising laden blog. 

shameless     you left out an e

[timendres]

15 minutes ago, n00dle said:

for what, while it does blather on endlessly spouting thailand dating cliches (the wife having a low opinion of thai women was a nice touch), i fail to see the product advertised, beyond the shamelss link to danaboutdrivel's advertising laden blog. 

His website is a (theoretically) revenue generator.

Dan promotes his website endlessly here with his utter drivel.

For someone who lives here, it is astonishing how incapable he is of finding a pulse.

[Skallywag]

33 minutes ago, Inspire Hua Hin said:

To read the rest of this blog by Dan about Thailand visit https://danaboutthailand.com/2020/07/20/how-do-decent-thai-women-find-decent-expats-in-thailand/

I wonder how this guy can support a wife and 2 young children just blogging or vlogging a couple times a week.  He did a blog a few weeks ago on "Island living" during the shutdown, yet he staying in a luxury villa, ate out at expensive restaurants, and didn't seem to be living any differently 

[Enzian]

One thing to meet 'em, another to keep 'em. First, the young women described may be very boring to a foreigner used to drama laden sex bombs from Issan, and though these girls are not unattractive, looks like theirs are dime a dozen here. Next, they don't want boyfriends they want husbands, but with Thai community property rules being much the same as the western world, and divorce rates being similar, what white guy in his right mind wants to get married (though I know a lot of you did)?

[ravip]

Seems there are more foreign 'Thai Experts' than the entire Thai population!

Universities should start a Degree program to standardise these expert opinions.

[holy cow cm]

Blah Blah Blah - blogger Dan trying to make money. 

[bkk6060]

I have dated both fairly extensively.

The problem I found with these Bangkok educated, supposed good job girls is they have tremendous debt and are usually seeking a total western lifestyle.  Many are attractive and have style, but that obviously comes at a cost.  And generally they are seeking partners close their age.

The girls in Bangkok I know who are with much older expats, the guys are very wealthy living in 80,000 b a month condos.

Anyway, much better I think to find a down to earth lady in a developing area such as Korat or Khon Kaen or other areas in Isaan.

Edited July 20, 2020 by bkk6060

[n00dle]

45 minutes ago, rumak said:

shameless     you left out an e

true that.

[n00dle]

31 minutes ago, Enzian said:

One thing to meet 'em, another to keep 'em. First, the young women described may be very boring to a foreigner used to drama laden sex bombs from Issan, and though these girls are not unattractive, looks like theirs are dime a dozen here. Next, they don't want boyfriends they want husbands, but with Thai community property rules being much the same as the western world, and divorce rates being similar, what white guy in his right mind wants to get married (though I know a lot of you did)?

so all foreigners are white guys?

 

[NanLaew]

1 hour ago, Pilotman said:

Their best bet is still social media, but here.  they will have to kiss an awful lot of frogs before a Prince appears. 

It's not my frog that needs kissin'!

[rumak]

4 minutes ago, bkk6060 said:

Anyway, much better I think to find a down to earth lady in a developing area such as Korat or Khon Kaen or other areas in Isaan.

........and learn the bloody language  !!     no, doesn't have to be isaan.    just plain old thai will do

 

mine's from KK  ...... 

[Henryford]

Most expats are usually young dossers/Youtubers looking for a life with no work or elderly retirees who would probably be too old for girls like this. I doubt there are many middle aged "decent" guys around. How could they stay in Thailand?

Edited July 20, 2020 by Henryford

[BritManToo]

1 hour ago, Inspire Hua Hin said:

The problem, they said, was meeting people now is often via apps like Tinder and Badoo. Here they are up against bar girls touting for business and also it was impossible to work out who are the good guys from those just looking for sex.

Why would a young guy be looking for anything but sex?

Westernised Thai girls ....... there's no market for them.

 

My step-daughter is in exactly the same position, slim, attractive, educated, final year at university, speaks perfect English nearly 23 years old and never been kissed.

 

Another problem being Thailand isn't a country to load yourself up with local baggage.

Having a Thai wife and children doesn't cut you any slack with immigration.

Might as well marry in a country that at least gives you a VISA break for having a local family.

(Vietnam 5 year VISA for $50, Philippines free VISA for married folk)

Edited July 20, 2020 by BritManToo

[Shot]

I call BS on the whole thing. None of that happened, but Dans getting some hits on his 'blog'.

[rumak]

Just now, BritManToo said:

Why would a guy be looking for anything but sex?

Westernised Thai girls ....... there's no market for them.

 

My step-daughter is in exactly the same position, slim, attractive, educated, final year at university, speaks perfect English nearly 23 years old and never been kissed.

thats the problem with the young ones.   its always the same darn position !

[Logosone]

Quote

 None of the three girls had a boyfriend and explained it is almost impossible to find anyone decent.

 

A very sad story, I almost cried. For Dan. Because he was lied to so shamelessly. Think about it. None of those three girls has a boyfriend and they are 30 something. That's not because they can't find someone decent. They found someone decent alright, but that decent person thought THEY were not that desirable to stay with them.

 

All women approaching 40 and even more those over 40 complain there are no "decent" guys, because that deflects from the fact that they are not desirable themselves and can't lock a guy down.

 

The heavy cache of alcohol certainly shows they're not just into "decent".

[Enzian]

9 minutes ago, n00dle said:

so all foreigners are white guys?

 

Knew that word would trigger someone, but I meant it loosely and left it in. Of course they are not, but tell me what % of HiSo ladies are looking for Nigerians or Indians? Racism in Thailand is a reality that I did not create, look at all the actors in Thai commercials.

[OneMoreFarang]

1 hour ago, Inspire Hua Hin said:

To read the rest of this blog by Dan about Thailand

I should have read the last line first. Then I would not have wasted my time with the rest.

[OneMoreFarang]

1 hour ago, Inspire Hua Hin said:

The girls had come prepared with plenty of food and drink, which included – a little to my surprise – lots of alcohol from wine, cider, Malibu to even Tequila.

Which good guy wants a wife who drinks too much?

Especially Tequila is something for bargirls, and only bargirls.

 

Maybe no decent guy was interested in a relation with them because they behaved like bargirls.