How much monthly salary should you pay for rescuing a bar girl?

[thailandsgreat]

The argument for shop girls is mainly that they are used to a moderate salary and doing duty "9 to 5". They have more realistic expectations of life than someone who tries to catch the highest spending punter, chat with friends all day and chat with men all evening. But there are good bar girls too, especially when they come of age. A young looker is the queen of the bar, guaranteed spoilt.  But younger non bar girls come with various mindsets.

Edited August 15, 2023 by thailandsgreat

[Hummin]

4 minutes ago, transam said:

 

 

Besides, this is a baiting thread, one of many by the OP to dribble over......

And it works, BigNok have become a forum influencer, and I wondering how much they pay him. 

 

Im soon out of here for detox

[spidermike007]

2 hours ago, thaibeachlovers said:

LOL. Disagree 100%.

Chances of a lasting marriage are 50% or lower. It's all about luck. If I had to check up on someone before asking them to marry me I wouldn't marry them.

Well, since the divorce rate in many countries is 50% anyway, I think you are saying it might be a marriage, with a typical outcome. What I do not understand about what you are saying is, would you avoid marrying a bar girl? Or would you marry one, and simply take her word for all she told you about her history or her background?

[NextG]

11 minutes ago, Hummin said:

Exactly ????

 

Could be ok for a few nithgs, but thats it, so, the question is, why should anyone like to be

As usual, most here think only in terms of sex. They don’t see capable of cultivating relationships. 
 

[Hummin]

3 minutes ago, spidermike007 said:

Well, since the divorce rate in many countries is 50% anyway, I think you are saying it might be a marriage, with a typical outcome. What I do not understand about what you are saying is, would you avoid marrying a bar girl? Or would you marry one, and simply take her word for all she told you about her history or her background?

Thais do not have any history. And if they have, they colour it to make everyone comfortable. Everyday is a new start a new horizon, and they seem not to be to tied up about their previous life. The major difference between western culture and Thai culture where everything seems to be about the past. 

 

I do not say that change their character, but at least it makes the difference for many girls, who seems not to be living in their pasts when given a new chance. I do not either say thats true for everybody. 

[scubascuba3]

24 minutes ago, NextG said:

What has being fat and ugly got to do with having a partner as a best friend? Keep up ????

Like I say that may change as you get older

[freedomnow]

In my case it would be zero just now.

 

Buying them an ice cream cone or tub much cheaper....that is to say - filter by profession or education.

[NextG]

1 minute ago, scubascuba3 said:

Like I say that may change as you get older

You think your best friends will abandon you when you get older? Let this one go, it doesn’t make any sense. 

[AlQaholic]

Don't forget the sick family water buffalo in Isan, and the maintenance of the rice field, all must be paid for.

[Hummin]

6 minutes ago, NextG said:

As usual, most here think only in terms of sex. They don’t see capable of cultivating relationships. 
 

It all depending on where you are in life and what needs is already covered. Everything is not as black and white as it seems, but still, there is a reason why so many thai girls is willing to live with a sugardaddy who think money only will solve everything in exchange for giving them a decent life. It takes a bit more than giving them the basics. 

[transam]

8 minutes ago, Hummin said:

And it works, BigNok have become a forum influencer, and I wondering how much they pay him. 

 

Im soon out of here for detox

Forum influencer, I don't think so.......????

And he is not the OP.......????

[transam]

1 minute ago, AlQaholic said:

Don't forget the sick family water buffalo in Isan, and the maintenance of the rice field, all must be paid for.

Good luck with that...............

[scubascuba3]

3 minutes ago, NextG said:

You think your best friends will abandon you when you get older? Let this one go, it doesn’t make any sense. 

No sense to you, if you break up with a  girlfriend who is a best friend, it's likely that friendship is over, maybe you've only had one girlfriend, your current one

[hotandsticky]

13 minutes ago, NextG said:

That’s a bit disgusting. If you think being someone’s ‘whore’ or ‘toy boy’ is undesirable, then how could you in good conscience subject someone to that experience?

You clearly haven’t got a clue anyway as to how it can be. Even though I’ve been the younger one or at least less financially stable in some of my relationships, I don’t have negative feelings of being used or treated in a negative manner. Plus of course they weren’t actually old in the first place. I was just young, at perhaps fifteen or sixteen, whilst having girlfriends in their mid twenties. I also had girlfriends closer to my age at the same time. 

 

Oh well, at least I now know that I don't have a clue.

 

Being someone’s ‘whore’ or ‘toy boy’ is undesirable in the scenario described. That is not the case with working girls in Asia. Not one of the girls has felt, to me, like a whore - as we relate to in the West - and as I would probably feel at some point in the Toy Boy scenario described above.

[spidermike007]

8 minutes ago, Hummin said:

Thais do not have any history. And if they have, they colour it to make everyone comfortable. Everyday is a new start a new horizon, and they seem not to be to tied up about their previous life. The major difference between western culture and Thai culture where everything seems to be about the past. 

 

I do not say that change their character, but at least it makes the difference for many girls, who seems not to be living in their pasts when given a new chance. I do not either say thats true for everybody. 

On a certain level I do agree with your sentiment. Most Thais seem to be incredibly resilient. A very admirable quality. Few seem stuck in the past or obsessed with the future.

[spidermike007]

Just now, hotandsticky said:

 

Oh well, at least I now know that I don't have a clue.

 

Being someone’s ‘whore’ or ‘toy boy’ is undesirable in the scenario described. That is not the case with working girls in Asia. Not one of the girls has felt, to me, like a whore - as we relate to in the West - and as I would probably feel at some point in the Toy Boy scenario described above.

Totally agree. In the West you pay for what you get too. But, it is less honest, and going into it, you have no idea what the amounts are, what her expectations are, and where you will finish, in the end. Taken for a ride? Gave her half of your assets? On the hook for huge amounts of alimony or child support? Lost homes?

 

I get a real kick out of the highly judgmental Western men who have an issue with giving a Thai woman an allowance here. As if the women back home do not have access to funds? I know guys back home who never even see their earnings, and have to ask their wives for money. Here, you can maintain total control of the finances, while giving a good, dedicated, kind, good looking, sexy, funny, and warmhearted woman (if you are very fortunate) some money for her shopping, eating out with friends, buying some clothes, etc. I call that the ability to maintain one's manhood, and control over their destiny in life.

[spidermike007]

Some of us prefer younger women. It is a form of insanity, or delusion, for a man 15-30 years older than the gal, to believe that money is not an integral component of whatever kind of relationship, or arrangement they have. That is true here, and it is 10x truer in the West. The big difference between here and there, is a guy with a reasonable pension, income or savings, can afford to get a younger gal here, and back there to get a pretty, young gal, 30 years younger, you need to be worth $50,000,000 or more. In my opinion money (financial security) is part of the equation at least 80% of the time, anywhere you go. A civilian needs money, and so does an ex bar girl. What is the real difference between a monthly allowance, and giving the wife full access to the bank accounts and assets? I prefer the former. By a longshot.
 

[khunPer]

On 8/14/2023 at 5:34 AM, Goat said:

What is fair?

Fair is whatever you have negotiated, and both parties are happy with. Not all girls are equal, meaning they might have different obligations family wise, and expectations both from family back home and the girl herself.

 

I know of several different solutions with former birds from the nightlife that has decided to settle together with a (former) customer.

 

Some were sent home til village with 5,000 baht a month until visa was settled, or whatever ready for a move in with the man. After that, the girl would work – if she moved to Farang-land – and could keep her salary (after tax), and in return for a place to live be house keeper and service the man; local food paid for, expensive Thai food on her own account.

Fair or not? Some ladies are happy for the chance to make (good) money to send home.

 

Others demand minimum 20,000 baht – today more likely 30,000 baht – per month in compensation to give up the bar-life. An attractive lady in the nightlife can easily make that kind of salary – or (much) more – each month. An attractive girl that can squeeze equivalent to $100 or €100 for a nights stay with a foreigner, can easily make in the level of 60k to 70k baht per month.

Fair or not? I know farangs that pays both 20k and 30k to their Thai spouse, plus free accommodation.

 

Some nightlife-birds might even expect a maid – yes, that's true – so she is not going to be a house keeper...

[Rhys]

The short time is best.

[bignok]

26 minutes ago, scubascuba3 said:

No sense to you, if you break up with a  girlfriend who is a best friend, it's likely that friendship is over, maybe you've only had one girlfriend, your current one

True. Break up lose wife, money and best friend.

 

 

[bignok]

43 minutes ago, Hummin said:

And it works, BigNok have become a forum influencer, and I wondering how much they pay him. 

 

Im soon out of here for detox

Not my topic.

[Ralf001]

3 hours ago, scubascuba3 said:

emails \ messages, same thing. You don't get the messages come through as emails?

nope.. direct message to the girl on the TF website.

[VinnieK]

1 hour ago, hotandsticky said:

Oh dear......I wouldn't want to be someone's whore.....or Toyboy.

Beats having to have a ghastly 'jaab' any day of the week 

...and a little secret here.

The women Im talkin about have zero interest in sex 

They just need a guy around, and they got the moolah.

Enjoy your reformed and POOR prostitutes ????

[paulikens]

21 hours ago, Hummin said:

You see it from a western point, if you see it from a Thai perspective, I have learned that the women is in charge of the household and expenses. 

No you have let them be in charge of that,  which is fair enough but it isn't a western thing or a Thai thing.   It's a decision by both parties.  

[Hummin]

1 minute ago, paulikens said:

No you have let them be in charge of that,  which is fair enough but it isn't a western thing or a Thai thing.   It's a decision by both parties.  

Okay, so Im wrong then, that it is not culturally depended?  

 

Why should anyone continue reminding someone about the past if you choose to stay in a relationship? 

 

My x girlfriends and fiance, could never let go of what I once said, or did, and it devoloped to no good for both of us trowing to ball back and forth.

 

Not one time have my wife done that! 

 

And I believe many with me had the same experiences.

 

My experience with thai ladies, have been positive when it comes to building a relation, and especially my wife where we both manage to make each other better.

 

What we say and do not say can make a difference.

 

How the past and future can rob you off the presence. Look it up what it means in Buddhism 

[save the frogs]

8 hours ago, Reginald Prewster said:

15.000 for our house maid who is a Jack of all Trades working 15 -16 hrs/day

why would you make someone work that many hours? sounds like slavery to me. 

 

[save the frogs]

2 hours ago, bignok said:

Not my topic.

so they're not paying you?

[BritManToo]

3 hours ago, NextG said:

I did it… but I lived with her ☺️
I did try to talk her out of it, but at 15/16 or however old I was, I didn’t have an alternative to offer. Luxury apartments close to Selfridges didn’t come cheap. 

Now I know your previous identity!

[Reginald Prewster]

1 hour ago, save the frogs said:

why would you make someone work that many hours? sounds like slavery to me. 

 

We are all working long hours, but more we are since over 15 years bond like a family to achieve our goals. 

Nobody is pushed to do overtime, but we all do it with the confidence and will to win.

 

If you have no clue what self employed means, then you might come along with your 8 hours day.

 

[NextG]

3 hours ago, BritManToo said:

Now I know your previous identity!

It’s not hidden. I imagined everyone knew ????