First Thai relationship, any advice?

[fredwiggy]

1 minute ago, hotandsticky said:

 

OK, let's for a moment consider the possibility that you are not a troll.

 

If you don't pay her an 'allowance' somebody else will

That's saying all Thai women are into getting money from boyfriends? How much do you think locals give for an allowance here? This one is a student, and not all students pay their way sleeping around with farangs. Some have families that actually do the part of parenting , are in two parent households, and help their kids further their education. When a woman has had kids already with a local that left town, and they had to raise the kids themselves or with help from grandma, those are the ones that will hope they find someone who will help them out, as is the case with many of us here that help support a girlfriend. Yes, there are many that feed off of farangs that don't live here, and send them money, and the plethora of greedy bar girls and women who won't work. This again, is a student, so give them the benefit of the doubt, and stop assuming the worse. She might be a keeper, or not. In time he will find out.

[1FinickyOne]

33 minutes ago, scubascuba3 said:

Well known college students do sex work to fund their studies and families

but not all... and a bit nasty to presume that... but, that's where you live. 

[impulse]

Advice?

 

Don't take relationship advice from reprobates.

[hotandsticky]

8 minutes ago, fredwiggy said:

That's saying all Thai women are into getting money from boyfriends? How much do you think locals give for an allowance here? This one is a student, and not all students pay their way sleeping around with farangs. Some have families that actually do the part of parenting , are in two parent households, and help their kids further their education. When a woman has had kids already with a local that left town, and they had to raise the kids themselves or with help from grandma, those are the ones that will hope they find someone who will help them out, as is the case with many of us here that help support a girlfriend. Yes, there are many that feed off of farangs that don't live here, and send them money, and the plethora of greedy bar girls and women who won't work. This again, is a student, so give them the benefit of the doubt, and stop assuming the worse. She might be a keeper, or not. In time he will find out.

 

 

I am not sure why you only refer to Farangs.

 

 

More Thai students earn money from servicing Thai males than Farangs.

[fredwiggy]

2 minutes ago, hotandsticky said:

 

 

I am not sure why you only refer to Farangs.

 

 

More Thai students earn money from servicing Thai males than Farangs.

Show me a link that might prove that. Word of mouth here, or anywhere for that matter, means nothing. People have their own agendas as far as commenting on other women here. many have been burned and think all women are greedy whores. My ex here was a real narcissist, a liar and disturbed, mainly because of her childhood. Doesn't mean I think all women here are bad. "Servicing" Thai males leads to nothing but being used, and a lot already know this. I would think the majority of girls going to a University don't bother much with men here. Furthering their education is a main reason not to rely on someone who won't stay after a child is born, nor help out financially. Most girls are attracted to boys, but smart ones won't waste their time when trying to have a better future for themselves.

[mancub]

31 minutes ago, ozthai23 said:

Good luck to them getting past my security lol

Isn't that what Prigozin said ? 

Seriously though, have you ever considered that she might be embarrassed or even ashamed to be seen with a foreigner ? Do her friends know about you ?

[proton]

what music does she like? ????

[OneMoreFarang]

3 hours ago, ozthai23 said:

There has been a few times she has said she's sore and doesn't want to do the thing, although we hadn't been together for a day or two.

Is her mouth sore? She should be able to make you happy. 

[ozthai23]

1 minute ago, mancub said:

Isn't that what Prigozin said ? 

Seriously though, have you ever considered that she might be embarrassed or even ashamed to be seen with a foreigner ? Do her friends know about you ?

Definitely crossed my mind. From what I gather her friend uncle is very small. She will meet a couple girlfriends for drinks maybe twice a month that I know about.

 

She does seem to walk behind me and if I walk slowly ticket her catch up she walks even slower, not sure what that's about. Sometimes I think she has no idea she's doing anything other than what she thinks is normal 

[OneMoreFarang]

"First Thai relationship, any advice?"

 

It won't last. But it gives you the opportunity to learn a lot.

Thais are different than farangs. The cultures are so different that you are sure things must be like this. And she is sure things must be like that. You both have to learn and accept that you are very different.

Use your time with your first girlfriend to learn. And then maybe by the time you get your second girlfriend you learned enough not to make the usual mistakes. Otherwise maybe you need to learn some more.

Just make sure you don't lose all your money on the first one. 

[hotandsticky]

12 minutes ago, fredwiggy said:

Show me a link that might prove that. Word of mouth here, or anywhere for that matter, means nothing. People have their own agendas as far as commenting on other women here. many have been burned and think all women are greedy whores. My ex here was a real narcissist, a liar and disturbed, mainly because of her childhood. Doesn't mean I think all women here are bad. "Servicing" Thai males leads to nothing but being used, and a lot already know this. I would think the majority of girls going to a University don't bother much with men here. Furthering their education is a main reason not to rely on someone who won't stay after a child is born, nor help out financially. Most girls are attracted to boys, but smart ones won't waste their time when trying to have a better future for themselves.

 

 

So Naive.

[n00dle]

3 hours ago, richard_smith237 said:

She's a female... they're all difference...   the mistake is attempting to understand them. 

 

You be you. Let her be her and just enjoy things, don't let your immaturity ruin what could be an enjoyable relationship. 

 

 

this is the only sane response. It is also the only resoonse i have read thus far that doensnt samck of geriatric paranoia. Enjoy thew woman while you can, walk on if you encounter issues.
 

[fredwiggy]

1 minute ago, hotandsticky said:

 

 

So Naive.

Far from it pal. Like I said, show me proof or don't reply. Your opinion means nothing, nor does anyone else's here, just because somebody told you something.  "Oh, I know someone who told me all girl students service more Thai males than farang males". That IS naive.

[scubascuba3]

29 minutes ago, 1FinickyOne said:

but not all... and a bit nasty to presume that... but, that's where you live. 

Not nasty at all, it's a possibility where he lives, how's your diet going? lost loads of weight?

[riclag]

Spend as much as you can afford to lose!

And have fun doing it!

Experience,12 years with many women and currently One Thai wife!

 

 

 

imop

 

[n00dle]

8 minutes ago, fredwiggy said:

Far from it pal. Like I said, show me proof or don't reply. Your opinion means nothing, nor does anyone else's here, just because somebody told you something.  "Oh, I know someone who told me all girl students service more Thai males than farang males". That IS naive.

oh the bloody irony.

 

Perhaps you would beieve him if here were to follow your lead and write long rambling responses that make their own sweeping generalizations like this gem?
 

Quote

"Servicing" Thai males leads to nothing but being used, and a lot already know this. I would think the majority of girls going to a University don't bother much with men here. Furthering their education is a main reason not to rely on someone who won't stay after a child is born, nor help out financially. Most girls are attracted to boys, but smart ones won't waste their time when trying to have a better future for themselves.

 

[orchis]

21 minutes ago, ozthai23 said:

She does seem to walk behind me and if I walk slowly ticket her catch up she walks even slower, not sure what that's about. Sometimes I think she has no idea she's doing anything other than what she thinks is normal 

doesn't want to be seen with you in public.
also seems like a total bore.

[fredwiggy]

7 minutes ago, n00dle said:

oh the bloody irony.

 

Perhaps you would beieve him if here were to follow your lead and write long rambling responses that make their own sweeping generalizations like this gem?
 

 

I asked him for proof of his opinion. He hasn't any. A short paragraph asking for proof and making a statement believing most girl students don't get paid to service Thai males more than farangs is hardly rambling, except maybe to one who cannot comprehend it. Or can you prove my sweeping generalization doesn't hold water?

[steven100]

A relationship with a Thai ....  hmmm ....   let me think for one millisecond   !  

there are just some nationalities who think it's ok to lie and cheat farang. 

you don't need to know anymore on my thoughts about Thais...

 

RUN FOREST RUN   !!         

 

 

 

 

 

[transam]

1 hour ago, fredwiggy said:

Maybe but true.

Well expand on it, because I live in an area in Isaan, and I don't understand what you are talking about.......????

[LaosLover]

4 hours ago, stoner said:

run.

A good looking young woman is popping over intermittently and offering up free (and prob pretty good) sex.

 

You're right, this is the saddest story I ever heard. How can this young man dodge this bullet?

[novacova]

4 hours ago, richard_smith237 said:

She's a female.

Are you sure??

[Celsius]

Another bloke who lost virginity in Thailand.

 

I do wonder if you ever had sex with anyone before you would be asking these questions? 

 

Or a troll?

 

In case you don't get it. You are already 100% incompatible due to cultural differences.

 

The 10 year age gap may not seem big in Thailand, but in fact it is huge. As a woman in her early 20's she will have completely different ideas and interests. You live on hope and dreams probably alone in Thailand. She has 100's of friends who already know everything about you and doesn't have to go on internet forums for relationship advice. You already lost mathematically. 

 

 

[bignok]

4 hours ago, scubascuba3 said:

Sounds like she may be doing short times elsewhere, that can leave them cold

Sounds 90% likely

[bignok]

19 minutes ago, LaosLover said:

A good looking young woman is popping over intermittently and offering up free (and prob pretty good) sex.

 

You're right, this is the saddest story I ever heard. How can this young man dodge this bullet?

Did he say free?

[fredwiggy]

19 minutes ago, transam said:

Well expand on it, because I live in an area in Isaan, and I don't understand what you are talking about.......????

Long drive from the beach, which is an attraction, although some might not care. Fishing and hunting are things I enjoy. No hunting here and fishing is only good in private lakes and a few reservoirs that are far away, with the exception of Sirindhorn, where you need a decent boat. Not anything besides a social drinker, and getting drunk every day isn't my thing, although you can do that anywhere. Boredom drives many to drink more also. If you've seen a few large temples, you've pretty much seen what's to ofer, although being a Christian, they are only something to see being curious of other religions and beliefs. Hill tribes are around Chiang Mai, and though I haven't yet seen them, that's not something you'll visit very often. The food is good, but you can go anywhere and eat good Thai food. Isaan is a great place to grow food, but as far as having anything to do, there isn't much. There aren't any pro sports stadiums to watch teams play like back home. They rarely have concerts in Thailand with music that I like., and none around here anyway. Thai music is okay, but not near what I'm into anyway. There is only one gym about 30 KM from where I live, but it doesn't open until 14;00, which is very inconvenient for me, as I've worked out 50 years , mostly early mornings. Pretty much to me is a boring place.

[transam]

15 minutes ago, fredwiggy said:

Long drive from the beach, which is an attraction, although some might not care. Fishing and hunting are things I enjoy. No hunting here and fishing is only good in private lakes and a few reservoirs that are far away, with the exception of Sirindhorn, where you need a decent boat. Not anything besides a social drinker, and getting drunk every day isn't my thing, although you can do that anywhere. Boredom drives many to drink more also. If you've seen a few large temples, you've pretty much seen what's to ofer, although being a Christian, they are only something to see being curious of other religions and beliefs. Hill tribes are around Chiang Mai, and though I haven't yet seen them, that's not something you'll visit very often. The food is good, but you can go anywhere and eat good Thai food. Isaan is a great place to grow food, but as far as having anything to do, there isn't much. There aren't any pro sports stadiums to watch teams play like back home. They rarely have concerts in Thailand with music that I like., and none around here anyway. Thai music is okay, but not near what I'm into anyway. There is only one gym about 30 KM from where I live, but it doesn't open until 14;00, which is very inconvenient for me, as I've worked out 50 years , mostly early mornings. Pretty much to me is a boring place.

Now sorry I asked.........

But, in other words, it is not the worst place on earth, just you are picky and want eeeeeeeeveeerything in place just for you.....????

[fredwiggy]

12 minutes ago, Celsius said:

Another bloke who lost virginity in Thailand.

 

I do wonder if you ever had sex with anyone before you would be asking these questions? 

 

Or a troll?

 

In case you don't get it. You are already 100% incompatible due to cultural differences.

 

The 10 year age gap may not seem big in Thailand, but in fact it is huge. As a woman in her early 20's she will have completely different ideas and interests. You live on hope and dreams probably alone in Thailand. She has 100's of friends who already know everything about you and doesn't have to go on internet forums for relationship advice. You already lost mathematically. 

 

 

It simply amazes me with so many who assume they know who or what a person here is just by them posting a few lines. How can you possibly conclude he is a virgin, a troll, or incompatible? Cultural differences mean something, but not near what basic man and women relationship factors do. People are people everywhere, and all act on the same kind of impulses, emotions and feelings. There are only a few different personality types, and that includes everyone on earth.                                                       Anyone can be compatible with anyone else they are attracted to, at least until they start talking. Then it comes down to good communication skills, trust, and having a background that hopefully doesn't include damage from parental figures.                           A 10 year difference is very small, and the thinking is pretty much the same, as soon as you are an adult, meaning past the age of 21. If someone is a teenager and the other is late twenties or older, then you'll have trouble relating, because the teenager isn't developed as far as maturity and life experiences. She and him can easily get along if they both have mutual interests and future goals. Attraction is obviously already there. He isn't paying her way besides dating, and she is staying with him overnights.                        A woman in her twenties does not have 100's of friends. Most people only have a small circle that they spend much time with. The rest are just acquaintances or friends of friends. Adding people on Facebook doesn't make them friends and companions. As far as everyone knowing about him. Thais hear what other Thais say to them about farangs, and a lot of it is BS. Judging a whole by hearing about a few means nothing. A lot of farangs buy their women here and pay a lot of money to keep them around, which makes it look like that's the way we all operate. The only real way a Thai knows what western life is about is to move there and live it. Hearsay brainwashes many. Believing their friends leads to a big letdown or unrealistic expectations.                                           Having a good male role model is the most important thing a girl can have growing up. This one isn't asking for money and neither is her family. They might not. Some Thais work their way up through College and want to be independent, and unlike the BS some have stated, most girls in college aren't servicing Thai men because most are smart enough to know it's a complete waste of time.

[fredwiggy]

Just now, transam said:

Now sorry I asked.........

But, in other words, it is not the worst place on earth, just you are picky and want eeeeeeeeveeerything in place just for you.....????

Never said it's the worst place on earth, only about the most boring, meaning Isaan and not Thailand. Not picky wanting to spend my retirement days doing things I enjoy. that's why I'll be going back as soon as possible.

[transam]

1 minute ago, fredwiggy said:

It simply amazes me with so many who assume they know who or what a person here is just by them posting a few lines. How can you possibly conclude he is a virgin, a troll, or incompatible? Cultural differences mean something, but not near what basic man and women relationship factors do. People are people everywhere, and all act on the same kind of impulses, emotions and feelings. There are only a few different personality types, and that includes everyone on earth.                                                       Anyone can be compatible with anyone else they are attracted to, at least until they start talking. Then it comes down to good communication skills, trust, and having a background that hopefully doesn't include damage from parental figures.                           A 10 year difference is very small, and the thinking is pretty much the same, as soon as you are an adult, meaning past the age of 21. If someone is a teenager and the other is late twenties or older, then you'll have trouble relating, because the teenager isn't developed as far as maturity and life experiences. She and him can easily get along if they both have mutual interests and future goals. Attraction is obviously already there. He isn't paying her way besides dating, and she is staying with him overnights.                        A woman in her twenties does not have 100's of friends. Most people only have a small circle that they spend much time with. The rest are just acquaintances or friends of friends. Adding people on Facebook doesn't make them friends and companions. As far as everyone knowing about him. Thais hear what other Thais say to them about farangs, and a lot of it is BS. Judging a whole by hearing about a few means nothing. A lot of farangs buy their women here and pay a lot of money to keep them around, which makes it look like that's the way we all operate. The only real way a Thai knows what western life is about is to move there and live it. Hearsay brainwashes many. Believing their friends leads to a big letdown or unrealistic expectations.                                           Having a good male role model is the most important thing a girl can have growing up. This one isn't asking for money and neither is her family. They might not. Some Thais work their way up through College and want to be independent, and unlike the BS some have stated, most girls in college aren't servicing Thai men because most are smart enough to know it's a complete waste of time.

Have you ever heard of paragraphs..........?  ????