Sexual assault in an international school

[pedro01]

My daughter (half English/half Thai) was sexually assaulted 2 times this week on a school trip. In one case a boy groped her in the swimming pool, then yesterday she was surrounded by a gang of 4 boys who started to touch her butt and breasts. One of the students in the latter attack had already been 'punished' for taking photographs up my daughters skirt. The punishment was suspension. For this offence his punishment is going to be "isolation" - so he's allowed at school but is supposed to stay away from my daughter. After 2 assaults. 

In the oldest attack, my daughter was surrounded by boys again and they started pulling on her bra. Two attacks occurred on school grounds and the other two on a school residential trip in Rayong.

That totals 4 sexual assaults against my daughter - all under school supervision. This is not just happening to my daughter at the school - but the girls are too afraid to come forward because they fear what the boys will do.

I would like your thoughts on civil/criminal action in this case. At the end of the day - it's sexual assault on a minor. Any good tips on lawyers would be good too!
 

[scubascuba3]

How about the police? useless as usual? get a lawyer ASAP, i have a lawyer friend who may be able to help but see if anyone else has recommendations 

[OneMoreFarang]

Did you contact the head of the school?

Did you contact the police?

What do they say?

[save the frogs]

After/while you resolve the legal aspect,

perhaps you can consider getting her out of there and homeschooling.

int'l schools have exorbitant fees anyway.

https://thinglishlifestyle.com/thinglish-lifestyle/homeschooling-in-thailand/

[pedro01]

30 minutes ago, scubascuba3 said:

How about the police? useless as usual? get a lawyer ASAP, i have a lawyer friend who may be able to help but see if anyone else has recommendations 

 

Haven't contacted the police yet as I'd prefer to let the lawyer do that. Plus - they are still on a school trip. Those buys got sent home but still...l

[DavisH]

Go to the press if you are not satisfied with the school's repercussions. The school won't be named for obvious reasons, but word will spread as to which school it is. School's always want to stay out of the news for issues like this. Try Amarin tv. 

[thainet]

I wouldn't be contacting a Lawyer. I would be contacting the Equaliser or the Beekeeper.

[thainet]

Just now, DavisH said:

Go to the press if you are not satisfied with the school's repercussions. The school won't be named for obvious reasons, but word will spread as to which school it is. School's always want to stay out of the news for issues like this. Try Amarin tv. 

Or Channel 32..they love that type of issue.

 

[pedro01]

25 minutes ago, OneMoreFarang said:

Did you contact the head of the school?

Did you contact the police?

What do they say?

 

This happened last night. The school did not contact me at all. This morning my daughter called me to explain what happened - apparently one of the teachers told her to make the call. 

 

I sent a strongly worded email to the school about it and the "head of secondary" called me 30 mins after sending. Not the headmaster, not the school owner - it only warranted contact from the head of secondary. He had nothing to say at all. He tried to explain why I'd gotten no call about it - like "we were still gathering details" - well how about f*** the details and let me know immediately when my daughter is assaulted. But how cowardly to not call, eh?

 

One lawyer is suggesting criminal action against the school, the students and the parents of those students. They are also suggesting a report to the ministry of education.

 

But how messed up is this? I'll have to take my daughter out of that school to protect her - yet those committing sexual assault get to stay.

[thainet]

6 minutes ago, pedro01 said:

 

This happened last night. The school did not contact me at all. This morning my daughter called me to explain what happened - apparently one of the teachers told her to make the call. 

 

I sent a strongly worded email to the school about it and the "head of secondary" called me 30 mins after sending. Not the headmaster, not the school owner - it only warranted contact from the head of secondary. He had nothing to say at all. He tried to explain why I'd gotten no call about it - like "we were still gathering details" - well how about f*** the details and let me know immediately when my daughter is assaulted. But how cowardly to not call, eh?

 

One lawyer is suggesting criminal action against the school, the students and the parents of those students. They are also suggesting a report to the ministry of education.

 

But how messed up is this? I'll have to take my daughter out of that school to protect her - yet those committing sexual assault get to stay.

The worst thing is the mental state of the girl after transgressions like this. My daughters best friend had similiar assaults at a well known Bangkok School about 8 years ago, and she went into a depressive shell for a very long time and still has nightmares. The boys of course (all rich family) were given some school cleaning duties for a week. This behavior really sucks.

 

[impulse]

40 minutes ago, Robert Paulson said:

Home school. I actually am continually astonished more people dont home school. I mean wtf are parents good for a few diaper changes and then you’re done

 

Most of us work for a living, and very few have the training to teach, even in subjects where we're experts.  Knowing something inside and out isn't the same as teaching it. 

 

It's an admirable endeavor.  But not practical for most families.

 

[Bangkokhatter]

How much longer is the school trip ?

 

I would consider going to pick her up yourself, and then listen to your lawyer.

 

Inform the school you will only be communicating through your lawyer from now.

 

As it is an International school the summer holidays should start soon so she should not miss much if she starts her holidays a few weeks early.

 

Most important part is being there for her and to start looking for a new school for the next school year. Try not to get too caught up with what punishment the boys will get, leave that to your lawyer.

[BangkokReady]

1 hour ago, thainet said:

The worst thing is the mental state of the girl after transgressions like this. My daughters best friend had similiar assaults at a well known Bangkok School about 8 years ago, and she went into a depressive shell for a very long time and still has nightmares. The boys of course (all rich family) were given some school cleaning duties for a week. This behavior really sucks.

 

 

This was my first though also.  It's a distressing thing for someone to have to endure in the first place, but seeing nothing being done to the perpetrators must make a victim question whether they deserve or caused the assault in the first place.

 

One of the worst things about Thailand.

[Lorry]

To consider: 

How old are the boys ? Are they minors? 

How rich are their families? Richer than you?

[thainet]

18 minutes ago, Robert Paulson said:

Teaching kids is the most important job we have. I can’t believe people leave it to other people. I mean that’s just insane who knows who this person could be. I think you’re just making excuses rearrange your life so you can teach your kids. And you seriously have got to be kidding me you don’t think you can out teach a teacher who is dealing with 30 kids at once and you are one on one? I find it insane one parent needs to get with it and teach their kids in all families, if not both parents. 

You are being a tad overzealous there RP. As someone noted above, it is not practical for most people, but if you find the time, and have the nous to do it, then great, but don't put others down for not considering it for their own circumstances. Calling people insane is a bridge too far..be nice.

[brewsterbudgen]

8 minutes ago, thainet said:

You are being a tad overzealous there RP. As someone noted above, it is not practical for most people, but if you find the time, and have the nous to do it, then great, but don't put others down for not considering it for their own circumstances. Calling people insane is a bridge too far..be nice.

In order to home school legally there is a lot of red tape to complete.

 

https://expatmoney.com/blog/homeschooling-in-thailand-a-detailed-guide-for-expats#:~:text=HOMESCHOOLING LEGAL REQUIREMENTS AND REGULATIONS&text=Homeschool law states that Thai,content to your teaching plan.

[save the frogs]

1 hour ago, thainet said:

The worst thing is the mental state of the girl after transgressions like this. My daughters best friend had similiar assaults at a well known Bangkok School about 8 years ago, and she went into a depressive shell for a very long time and still has nightmares. The boys of course (all rich family) were given some school cleaning duties for a week. This behavior really sucks.

 

 

If I were the OP, I would focus 95% on the mental health of daughter and 5% on the corruption.

Get the girl a counselor to help her overcome the trauma. 

 

Because the corruption may be so far-reaching that no one will ever do anything about it. 

Maybe the Ministry or Education is already aware that this takes place in many schools and just turns a blind eye to it.

And they are govt, after all. Good luck filing a lawsuit against the govt. 

 

 

[richard_smith237]

If you don't mind - which school is this ?...   

In Bangkok - if you're not willing to outwardly name the school, drop a hint ?.. 

 

The reasonI ask...    something a little similar happened before at St.Andrews (Sukhuvit 71 - Bangkok)... 

Some boys took a photo of a nude girl off the net and edited the photo adding two the the school girls photos - the edits were apparently convincing. Two boys were expelled.

 

IMO - this is assault, bit as the 'boy' are not adults I'm not sure what legal penalties there could be. 

But, expulsion is the option here - there is no way the should should accept any excuse or allow these boys to remain in the schools whereby the same could happen again to other students.

 

Demand meetings with the head - take a lawyer, threaten legal action and damages against the school - make this huge, so that the School has no choice but to respond firmly. 

The better the reputation of the school, the more likely they are to respond to the risk of potential negative publicity.

 

[richard_smith237]

1 minute ago, save the frogs said:

Maybe the Ministry or Education is already aware that this takes place in many schools and just turns a blind eye to it.

 

Path of least resistance - they are lazy & do as little as possible until they realise they can't.

 

In short, ensure that you (use, we, the Op) do not become the path of least resistance in such situations (and many others).

[save the frogs]

https://prachataienglish.com/node/9990

 

In June 2022, it was reported that a 6th-grade student raped a 5th-grade student in a school in Phetchabun. This news triggered criticism on social media, because the school principal told the girl not to tell her parents that she was raped at school since it would damage their reputation and because she would not get pregnant. Thairath Online later reported that the case ended after the boy’s family paid 10,000 baht to the girl’s family, while the principal was transferred to another school.

 

Sexual abuse remains an ongoing problem in Thai schools. According to the Thai Police Central Information Technology Centre , from 2016 to 2021 the police received a total of 12,431 rape complaints. 

 

Orawee Yafu, a social worker at the Hug Project, a non-governmental organization that helps victims of child sexual abuse

 

When sexual abuse occurs in a school, some schools will coordinate with related agencies to help the victims and punish the abusers. Some schools, however, choose to ignore the abuse or penalize the victims instead, such as by expelling them, to maintain the school’s reputation.

 

[save the frogs]

https://www.hugproject.org/

[Woof999]

Nowhere near as serious as what has happened to your daughter, but my step daughter started a new school last week. Today she came home with scratches on her neck and arms. She was apparently attacked by a boy. She is 9. I don't know how old the boy is. Again, apparently, the first call that the school made was to the parents of the boy to tell them that he'd done it again.

 

I will be going to the school first thing tomorrow morning to make it very clear what will happen if she crosses paths with this boy again. The whole world will know that he'd done it at least 3 times and the school did little or nothing. I really don't give a flying feck if the ridiculous defamation law comes at me, there are some things that you just don't stand for.

[stoner]

1 hour ago, Bangkokhatter said:

Most important part is being there for her and to start looking for a new school for the next school year. Try not to get too caught up with what punishment the boys will get, leave that to your lawyer.

 

100 thumbs up to this. 

[pasathai]

contact the medial if law enforcement fails after several  trys 

[stoner]

Just now, pasathai said:

contact the medial if law enforcement fails after several  trys 

 

that might not be the best thing for the child. more attention and spotlight during this already stressful time might add to the trauma. 

[NorthernRyland]

Does international schools mean non-Thai students? Some cultures tolerate this and consider it "boys will be boys" etc... maybe even Thailand is like this but I've never seen it myself.

[impulse]

1 hour ago, Robert Paulson said:

And you seriously have got to be kidding me you don’t think you can out teach a teacher who is dealing with 30 kids at once and you are one on one?

 

When do the kids learn to share, resolve conflict (which will serve them later at work), and to wait their turn, and learn social skills, and how to navigate social hierarchy?  30 kids in a class is a mixed blessing/curse.  Great preparation for thriving in the office, that's going to look much the same.

 

[richard_smith237]

5 minutes ago, NorthernRyland said:

Does international schools mean non-Thai students? Some cultures tolerate this and consider it "boys will be boys" etc... maybe even Thailand is like this but I've never seen it myself.

 

No... International Schools means schools that are not administered by the Thai Education authority.

 

Standards obviously vary, as does the price. 

 

This sort of behavior is dealt with extremely swiftly at the 'upper tier' international schools where reputation matters.

 

 

[sungod]

1 hour ago, Robert Paulson said:

Teaching kids is the most important job we have. I can’t believe people leave it to other people. I mean that’s just insane who knows who this person could be. I think you’re just making excuses rearrange your life so you can teach your kids. And you seriously have got to be kidding me you don’t think you can out teach a teacher who is dealing with 30 kids at once and you are one on one? I find it insane one parent needs to get with it and teach their kids in all families, if not both parents. 

I sincerely hope you are not home schooling in English grammar, yours is appalling.

[MalcolmB]

A bit harsh to expel students for this I think.
 

Surely should be dealt with so they know not to do it again, but expelling  15 year old boys ruining their education, or involving police, media and lawyers is a bit much. They are just learning.

 

If a teacher did it then castrate him, but 15 year old boys pulling at girls bra straps need to be given a second chance. Part of growing up.

If I was the father I would give the boys a good clip around the ear and a stern warning after school one day.

But not involve all the others.