6 hours ago, ballpoint said:

It's upside down.

 

Blonde!!

7 hours ago, ballpoint said:

What idiot left the caption off the photo?

 

On 10/22/2022 at 4:52 PM, overherebc said:

If the lamp post is missing the dogs will have nothing to go on.

Are you taking the pee?

They can still walk on the pavement/sidewalk although how they will see at night with no lamp posts might be a problem since there are not cat's eyes for them to use!

8 hours ago, ballpoint said:

If you dig down deep enough, you might just get a handle on it if you have not gone to pot already and fried your brains!

 

8 hours ago, ballpoint said:

Is he sitting still waiting for another promotion or just so cocksure that he can now pi!ss in the wind with impunity!

43 minutes ago, DezLez said:

If you dig down deep enough, you might just get a handle on it if you have not gone to pot already and fried your brains!

 

That should pan out well.  I thought I'd planted it in soil with too many woks in it.

14 minutes ago, ballpoint said:

That should pan out well.  I thought I'd planted it in soil with too many woks in it.

Out of the frying pan and into!!!!

 

PS; are we allowed wok(e) jokes/comments or are you giving me a grilling and I am now toast?

A big motorway crash unfortunately led to four nuns dying. St Peter was waiting for them at the gates of heaven..

 

He spoke to the four nuns. "I'll ask you a question and if you answer truthfully, and agree to do as I say, you are free to go through the gates and enter heaven."

 

To the first nun he said; "Sister Alice; did you ever touch Father Thomas' penis?"

"Yes, but only with my little finger."

St Peter told her; "Go to the font of holy water, and wash your finger."

She did as requested. St Peter nodded, and Sister Alice walked through the gates.

 

St Peter said to the second nun; "Sister Matilda; did you ever touch Father Thomas' penis?"

"Yes, but only with my hand."

St Peter replied; "Go to the same font full of holy water, and wash your hand."

She did as requested, St Peter nodded, and Sister Matilda walked through the gates.

 

There was a little bit of argy-bargy with the last two nuns. St Peter saw that one of the nuns was trying to force her way in front of the other.

 

St Peter asked; "Sister Teresa. Why are you trying to force your way in front of the other sister?"

"Well Peter, I thought it better get my gargle done, before Sister Mary had to wash her backside."

Stallone: I'm making a movie about composers. I'm playing Beethoven.

Willis: I'll be Mozart.

Schwarzenegger: Stop it guys, I'm not saying it.

 

Did you hear Stevie Wonder and Ray Charles played each other at tennis?

It was endless love.

These so called "Speed Bumps" are rubbish.

If anything they just slow you down. 

1 hour ago, MJCM said:

Stallone: I'm making a movie about composers. I'm playing Beethoven.

Willis: I'll be Mozart.

Schwarzenegger: Stop it guys, I'm not saying it.

 

saying what?

Safety first!

Common sense second.

4 minutes ago, Neeranam said:

saying what?

 

And next on the "there's no hope for some people" list...

 

Redneck jump leads