Dating advice.....possible, but not obvious "Sick buffalo"

[NCC1701A]

1 minute ago, sofreshnsocleanclean said:

I know. I wasn't talking about you. 

can i ask you a question? are there bar girls working in your friends bar?  can you bar fine them?

[AlexRich]

9 minutes ago, sofreshnsocleanclean said:

Yes this was one of my first questions/apprehensions too actually. The best way to avoid that is to have several small investors who don't know each other, each owning only a few percent - arranged by a reputable lawyer. I would personally never ever invest with only a few partners on the other half. 

That might well help. However, don’t bank on it. My key advice is only do it with money you can afford to lose ... that that doesn’t kill you makes you stronger ... so to speak. We all fail our way forward to some extent. 

 

As for the girl. Keep in touch by all means, but don’t give her money, that really is a dumb move. Another poster accused you of naivety ... he wasn’t being cruel, he was just giving you the benefit of his experience. Americans, god bless them, can sometimes be like innocents abroad, and take people at face value. I don’t lie or cheat people, so it’s natural to think the same about people I meet.  But years of travelling and working in other countries have taught me to be significantly more guarded.

 

 

 

[sofreshnsocleanclean]

1 minute ago, NCC1701A said:

can i ask you a question? are there bar girls working in your friends bar?  can you bar fine them?

I would say that the girls in her bar are like a "grey area" bar girl.... they attract the guys by being pretty, they serve the drinks and guys buy drinks for them, but as far as I saw and heard from her, they didn't go to anyone's room. There's no "boom boom" area or room either. 

Wasn't much different to when I worked in bars in downtown San Diego. We hired pretty girls for this very reason, and they stand outside and attract men. 

[sofreshnsocleanclean]

3 minutes ago, AlexRich said:

That might well help. However, don’t bank on it. My key advice is only do it with money you can afford to lose ... that that doesn’t kill you makes you stronger ... so to speak. We all fail our way forward to some extent. 

 

As for the girl. Keep in touch by all means, but don’t give her money, that really is a dumb move. Another poster accused you of naivety ... he wasn’t being cruel, he was just giving you the benefit of his experience. Americans, god bless them, can sometimes be like innocents abroad, and take people at face value. I don’t lie or cheat people, so it’s natural to think the same about people I meet.  But years of travelling and working in other countries have taught me to be significantly more guarded.

 

 

 

Ok but once again, I have lived abroad in a handful of countries and this isn't my first time around the block. If I wasn't skeptical and was "totally naive", I wouldn't be inquiring about this & being suspicious, would I??

[AlexRich]

3 minutes ago, sofreshnsocleanclean said:

Ok but once again, I have lived abroad in a handful of countries and this isn't my first time around the block. If I wasn't skeptical and was "totally naive", I wouldn't be inquiring about this & being suspicious, would I??

No need to get triggered. I’m not that type of poster.

[sofreshnsocleanclean]

3 minutes ago, AlexRich said:

No need to get triggered. I’m not that type of poster.

There was zero animosity in my reply. No emotion here - was just a logical question. Don't misunderstand me, what has been said to me has been mostly fair. 

Edited March 13, 2019 by sofreshnsocleanclean

[Nyezhov]

4 minutes ago, sofreshnsocleanclean said:

Ok but once again, I have lived abroad in a handful of countries and this isn't my first time around the block. If I wasn't skeptical and was "totally naive", I wouldn't be inquiring about this & being suspicious, would I??

You have already made up your mind and are just looking for folks to parrot what you want to hear.

 

Let me help. This gorgeous rich sexy woman is crazy about you and wants to work with you, side by side, into building a dream life and vacation empire. You need to trust her and just hand her everything you own. It will work. Its a once in a lifetime chance. Dont blow it.

[Nyezhov]

1 hour ago, sofreshnsocleanclean said:

I'm American, Hans. 

Good. Try not to be too silly, the Euros are watching

[sofreshnsocleanclean]

1 minute ago, Nyezhov said:

You have already made up your mind and are just looking for folks to parrot what you want to hear.

 

Let me help. This gorgeous rich sexy woman is crazy about you and wants to work with you, side by side, into building a dream life and vacation empire. You need to trust her and just hand her everything you own. It will work. Its a once in a lifetime chance. Dont blow it.

Nope. You are absolutely wrong about that. 

[Nyezhov]

Just now, sofreshnsocleanclean said:

Nope. You are absolutely wrong about that. 

OK then you had better get out while you can ????

[AlexRich]

5 minutes ago, sofreshnsocleanclean said:

There was zero animosity in my reply. No emotion here - was just a logical question. Don't misunderstand me, what has been said to me has been mostly fair. 

Would I??

 

For a first post you’ve had much more balanced responses than others get ... the trolls will no doubt show up at some point, maybe it’s a busy news week on TV?

[sofreshnsocleanclean]

Just now, Nyezhov said:

OK then you had better get out while you can ????

I'm leaning more towards what petermik said, "Enjoy the ride while it lasts,when it changes direction get off and wait for another" 

[sofreshnsocleanclean]

1 minute ago, AlexRich said:

Would I??

 

For a first post you’ve had much more balanced responses than others get ... the trolls will no doubt show up at some point, maybe it’s a busy news week on TV?

Huh? I said, what was said to me thus far, has been mostly fair. I said the same thing you just said....

[OneMoreFarang]

3 hours ago, sofreshnsocleanclean said:

she's 41

[...]

a woman who owns 3 bars in Ko Samui

[...]

Aside from being very attractive, she's actually quite interesting - she's the quiet, shy type

A quiet, shy, 41 year old woman who is very attractive and owns three bars.

I gave up reading after that.

 

But I can tell you already: She is different, that is sure.

[bwpage3]

3 hours ago, sofreshnsocleanclean said:

I really would appreciate your input, guys. 

Also, she does tell me all the time that I "look so hansuuum" and that I could get so many younger, better looking girls if I want. .... To me this is somewhat normal behavior, but maybe she's doing that on purpose???

Didn't you know that Thailand is full of handsome men?

[sofreshnsocleanclean]

1 minute ago, OneMoreFarang said:

A quiet, shy, 41 year old woman who is very attractive and owns three bars.

I gave up reading after that.

 

But I can tell you already: She is different, that is sure.

I am not trying to reassure anyone that she is different. Otherwise, why would I be here asking if my suspicions are unfounded or not?

[bwpage3]

3 hours ago, sofreshnsocleanclean said:

I'm starting to think she's just REALLY good at this. 
Either that or I'm insecure......

How many foreigners has she come across in her bars at her age?

 

She can spot a newbie love sick puppie a mile away

 

You are in way over your head.

 

Time to cut and run

[sofreshnsocleanclean]

2 minutes ago, bwpage3 said:

Didn't you know that Thailand is full of handsome men?

You're only reinforcing my suspicion. I didn't say I believed her. 

[bwpage3]

2 hours ago, sofreshnsocleanclean said:

I get what you're saying but she also has a bachelor's in marketing and I don't think bar girls really end up buying the bar in most cases.... but I could be wrong. That's why I'm here. 

Keep talking yourself into it mate

 

She was a bar girl, now she owns the bars.

 

Good sex with you?

 

At her age she has probably slept with at least 100 farangs

 

You are talking yourself right into something everything is telling you is wrong

 

 

[AlexRich]

4 minutes ago, sofreshnsocleanclean said:

Huh? I said, what was said to me thus far, has been mostly fair. I said the same thing you just said....

I give up. Good luck whatever you do.

[Olmate]

2 minutes ago, bwpage3 said:

Didn't you know that Thailand is full of handsome men?

There was an English lad here last week who had a lovely girl in Patong, he was  hansum too!

[sofreshnsocleanclean]

Just now, AlexRich said:

I give up. Good luck whatever you do.

Now I'm really confused. I agreed with you. Said the same thing you said. And you still interpret it as me arguing with you.....??

[sofreshnsocleanclean]

4 minutes ago, bwpage3 said:

Keep talking yourself into it mate

 

She was a bar girl, now she owns the bars.

 

Good sex with you?

 

At her age she has probably slept with at least 100 farangs

 

You are talking yourself right into something everything is telling you is wrong

 

 

Fair enough. I asked to begin with though, because I am confused about it. 

Edited March 13, 2019 by sofreshnsocleanclean

[Kwasaki]

4 minutes ago, sofreshnsocleanclean said:

Fair enough. I asked to begin with though, because I am confused about it. 

Oh no not page 7.

[sofreshnsocleanclean]

Just now, Kwasaki said:

Oh no not page 7.

mmmkay

[bwpage3]

2 hours ago, sofreshnsocleanclean said:

As long as I'm aware of that possibility and not convincing myself otherwise then I guess it's a non issue. As soon as it happens I'll see it from a mile off. I'm not naive. But thanks for confirming my suspicions aren't just paranoia. 

At her age what good are you to her?
 

You dont live in Thailand

 

You honestly think she will wait years for you at her age?

 

There are bar girls that will bang farangs all night for money and at the end of the night jump on the back of their Thai BF's motorbike

 

If the Thai girl is really in love, they will do anything

 

Did she offer to support you, let you live with her, take care of you etc

 

No she did not

 

You are just another number and easily infatuated as most foreigners are the first time

 

It's not love, it's infatuation on your part

[sofreshnsocleanclean]

Just now, bwpage3 said:

At her age what good are you to her?
 

You dont live in Thailand

 

You honestly think she will wait years for you at her age?

 

There are bar girls that will bang farangs all night for money and at the end of the night jump on the back of their Thai BF's motorbike

 

If the Thai girl is really in love, they will do anything

 

Did she offer to support you, let you live with her, take care of you etc

 

No she did not

 

You are just another number and easily infatuated as most foreigners are the first time

 

It's not love, it's infatuation on your part

I never claimed love, actually. At this point it's early in dating. I came here because I'd like to know what to look out for, and because I don't have all the answers. And you might be right - and it's something I'll keep in the back of my mind. Thanks for your input. 

[bwpage3]

1 hour ago, sofreshnsocleanclean said:

I'm planning to invest with a European couple in a B&B together with them next year (they're already running one, successfully).

When I invest, it will be my own business. Well, 50% of it anyway. The rest will be a large group of silent investors who have very little voting power over the business.  

But why do you say that?

You won't be owning 50% of anything

[sofreshnsocleanclean]

1 minute ago, bwpage3 said:

You won't be owning 50% of anything

and why's that

[sofreshnsocleanclean]

3 minutes ago, bwpage3 said:

You won't be owning 50% of anything

You don't know me, my business experience, my education, or how much money I have. So take your cynicism somewhere else, please.