I'm surprised another one in Thailand.

 

if she is working in a bar playing pool an connect the dots she is available.

Note many bars make it their policy that girls need a min of x days "off" /month or their salary is cut.

 

Bars girls are to be enjoyed while ur in country and forgotten about once you leave.

15 hours ago, JFK39 said:

Yeah Pretty much,

 

I said to her im not wealthy and i cant send her money (which is sort of a lie i could send her money if needed but i wouldn't) Im not that bad off in England i can get girls here quite easyily i have a good job + my own home ect.

 

I'm not that interested in dating a thai girl but this one is nice and tbh i would like to spend more time with her and get to know her which she wants too from what i can gather she was the one who initiated i come back soon and spend time with her.

 

I told her that i don't want to talk to her anymore its going no where, She works in a bar and obviously other men will be trying to come-on to her and basically she said all she dose in the bar is serve and play games she don't go back with men. (which maybe is a lie) lets face it i just want to make sure before fobbing her off because you never know ????

 

Keep an eye out for a PM from me coming soon.

Well I'm probably going to break the seemingly general consensus on this......... 

 

I have many friends who have owned bars here and have helped one out in particular because he was in a wheelchair for many years, so I was able to go behind the bar, and get to know many of the girls working there, as well as other girls from friends who have other bars, and sure enough there are some bad ones out there, but there are also some good ones.

 

Some of those who have been working in the bars for shorter periods are keen to get out of that way of life and although they like living in Thailand, they  really don't like the lifestyle they live, and I have that straight from the horses mouth as they say.

 

Straight off the top of my head I can name about eight relationships which have succeeded and which started in a bar, and if I thought long and hard I could probably name quite a few more, although I know many, many other relationships can fail quite miserably and if one doesn't have one's head screwed on, then there could be some quite heavy financial losses involved.

 

My advice to the poster is to have a holiday and see how things go and that's the only way he will know.

 

FWIW I have known two or three bar girls with whom I would quite happily have had a long-term relationship, but as I prefer being single, that never materialised.

 

Yes there are lots of sad and bad luck stories, but in amongst them there is the occasional gem.

23 minutes ago, xylophone said:

Well I'm probably going to break the seemingly general consensus on this......... 

 

I have many friends who have owned bars here and have helped one out in particular because he was in a wheelchair for many years, so I was able to go behind the bar, and get to know many of the girls working there, as well as other girls from friends who have other bars, and sure enough there are some bad ones out there, but there are also some good ones.

 

Some of those who have been working in the bars for shorter periods are keen to get out of that way of life and although they like living in Thailand, they  really don't like the lifestyle they live, and I have that straight from the horses mouth as they say.

 

Straight off the top of my head I can name about eight relationships which have succeeded and which started in a bar, and if I thought long and hard I could probably name quite a few more, although I know many, many other relationships can fail quite miserably and if one doesn't have one's head screwed on, then there could be some quite heavy financial losses involved.

 

My advice to the poster is to have a holiday and see how things go and that's the only way he will know.

 

FWIW I have known two or three bar girls with whom I would quite happily have had a long-term relationship, but as I prefer being single, that never materialised.

 

Yes there are lots of sad and bad luck stories, but in amongst them there is the occasional gem.

 

Good post xyl .... much the same way I would write it.

 

For each relationship that works out well there are hundreds that fail very badly.

 

Any  guys that ask me about long term relationship (I have Thai wife for 24 years now) I say try to find a lady working in a shop, restaurant, or cashier at the bar. 'Working' lady from bar is dicey. Maybe a girl fresh from up country and not yet hardened to smoking, drinking, and worse ... gambling. I know plenty that start to enjoy the 'excitement' of different men, money, bar life and even if a nice man comes along they won't give up that life and just string the man along for money and fun. Those are the worst kind. Very dangerous. 

Yeah  Ill help,  sell all your  stuff, marry her, give her everything, get divorced , and up  in the gutter or falling off  balcony, game  over, wait for  your atoms to reassemble into some or  many other  things.......... pretty simple  really

20 hours ago, Nakmuay887 said:

you are asking for someone to go to the bar and try to pick her up? Am I reading between the lines correctly here? 

 

Move on dude, not worth the headache and mess to come IMO

 

there's none so blind as those who don't want to see.

 

19 hours ago, mercman24 said:

you could end up like my ex mate who sent 25/30000 baht a month for 4 years, saying him and his girl were sound !!  i must send him those photos one day,,  lol

and  me and  my 8  brothers + the  dog????

19 hours ago, JFK39 said:

 

Yeah Pretty much,

 

I said to her im not wealthy and i cant send her money (which is sort of a lie i could send her money if needed but i wouldn't) Im not that bad off in England i can get girls here quite easyily i have a good job + my own home ect.

 

I'm not that interested in dating a thai girl but this one is nice and tbh i would like to spend more time with her and get to know her which she wants too from what i can gather she was the one who initiated i come back soon and spend time with her.

 

I told her that i don't want to talk to her anymore its going no where, She works in a bar and obviously other men will be trying to come-on to her and basically she said all she dose in the bar is serve and play games she don't go back with men. (which maybe is a lie) lets face it i just want to make sure before fobbing her off because you never know ????

 

 

 

 

 

Have a look at her FB / Instagram how many foreign followers she has, that will give you an idea of the amount of man "not sleeping" with her. 

4 minutes ago, FritsSikkink said:

Have a look at her FB / Instagram how many foreign followers she has, that will give you an idea of the amount of man "not sleeping" with her. 

 

In this modern social world that's not such a great guide as plenty men just 'latch' onto any open Facebook page in the hoping of snagging an easy woman and if lucky her money too. 

 

My wife has many 'hits' on her social media. All unsolicited. Sometimes I answer back just to laugh at their pitch. Lead them along. Some ask for money to buy flight ticket to Phuket.  

...... so you want me to sleep with her to see how good she is? I confew....

Thank you all for the help/ banter i understand how thai girls are she seemed different but appears not life goes on, It's not like i paused my life for her or anything i just thought if it's too good to be true then it is. I'm still meeting and hooking up with people in the uk so i'm not one of those sad people who get hooked on these girls are throw cash at them I'm 28 who's not bad looking and muscular built so she wont be the last one

 

Again thanks everyone for input (l)

Treat thai women like your mobile phone,no long term contracts,just pay as you go 

4 minutes ago, JFK39 said:

Thank you all for the help/ banter i understand how thai girls are she seemed different but appears not life goes on, It's not like i paused my life for her or anything i just thought if it's too good to be true then it is. I'm still meeting and hooking up with people in the uk so i'm not one of those sad people who get hooked on these girls are throw cash at them I'm 28 who's not bad looking and muscular built so she wont be the last one

 

Again thanks everyone for input (l)

 

Your comment about 'too good to be true' is exactly what I was thinking 24 years ago when I met my now wife. She was unattached, no Thai guys, a failed relationship with an Englishman for 6 years (seems a drunk and unfaithful ?), no kids. I just happened into Phuket for R &R after a 4 months at sea assignment. Met her at hotel reception, liked her, asked her to be my guide, in the 6 days I ended up buying a house with 30 year lease. Asked her if she would like to live with me. I was quite clear she would not be a 'paid' companion.  I asked about her home village (near Cha-am) and first Thai event made a point of going up to her village and met all her many family. Her story all checked out. And since then all has been good.  I am best friends with all the extended family, and no I don't pay money for sick buffaloes, 

 

My point is that for me too good to be true worked out true.  

2 minutes ago, LivinginKata said:

 

Your comment about 'too good to be true' is exactly what I was thinking 24 years ago when I met my now wife. She was unattached, no Thai guys, a failed relationship with an Englishman for 6 years (seems a drunk and unfaithful ?), no kids. I just happened into Phuket for R &R after a 4 months at sea assignment. Met her at hotel reception, liked her, asked her to be my guide, in the 6 days I ended up buying a house with 30 year lease. Asked her if she would like to live with me. I was quite clear she would not be a 'paid' companion.  I asked about her home village (near Cha-am) and first Thai event made a point of going up to her village and met all her many family. Her story all checked out. And since then all has been good.  I am best friends with all the extended family, and no I don't pay money for sick buffaloes, 

 

My point is that for me too good to be true worked out true.  

 

Sounds good but it's not going to be like that for everyone. Hope everything stays the same for you.

At the end of the day, self promoting good-looking well-off western guy who admits to currently hooking up with girls back home was considering getting involved with a Thai bar worker, but he doesn't trust her. Not a great basis for a relationship.

 

I know whose side I'm on!

On 12/24/2019 at 12:43 PM, JFK39 said:

On 12/24/2019 at 12:40 PM, ripstanley said:

There is a bar complex just opposite the Pride Hotel. One is Ocean View Bar which is Thai owned and the Dolphin Bar which is French owned. There are also another couple of bars in that complex.

yeah thats the one mate we stayed in pride hotel so was literally 10 second walk to bar =D

Ah yes, I remember now. I stay at the Bliss and walk past that area every night. Never gone in there - maybe next time! 

On 12/24/2019 at 7:43 PM, JFK39 said:

yeah thats the one mate we stayed in pride hotel so was literally 10 second walk to bar =D

Maybe it's just me, but if I wanted to impress girls I wouldn't stay at the Pride Resort.

 

(I note it's the old Sea Pearl Resort, now named Pride Beach Resort and is "catering for the needs of the LGBT Community") 

On 12/24/2019 at 8:34 PM, ChasingTheSun said:

Would you want to seriously date a woman working as a “guest-entertainer“ in a bar in the UK? Too many red flags right? 

 

However, if you are looking to try To find a serious relationship with much fewer red flag warning signs, there are literally millions of other single Thai women who dont work as “guest-entertainers” in bars(or in massage shops), many of whom I suspect may be better candidates for a serious relationship.

Yes like the idiot who suggested to me when i posted sometime ago on a dilemma i was facing to get a 'Temple girl" which in 8 years here i have never heard of,and women who go to the temple,do not go to be chatted up by falangs.

On 12/25/2019 at 7:42 PM, JFK39 said:

Thank you all for the help/ banter i understand how thai girls are she seemed different but appears not life goes on, It's not like i paused my life for her or anything i just thought if it's too good to be true then it is. I'm still meeting and hooking up with people in the uk so i'm not one of those sad people who get hooked on these girls are throw cash at them I'm 28 who's not bad looking and muscular built so she wont be the last one

 

Again thanks everyone for input (l)

Mate,if you are as you say,why worry about a Thai girl,sure they are exotic and very open to sex,but at your age look for and English bird,if there are any left there that are not obese.I have had 2 wives here,countless girlfriends, the one i am with now seems okay,great in bed,good fun,great housewife and cook,but i have learnt things change,if a better offer came along i think she would be off more than likely,mind that can happen anywhere,aaah,women!

On 12/24/2019 at 5:06 PM, ChasingTheSun said:

How many tattoos does she have, how big are they, and where are they located?

 

when you say she works in a bar, do you mean she is a pole dancer, a dishwasher, or bartender or what?

 

is the bar actually on beach road, or where exactly? 

More important question is How old are you & how old is she... 

 

If you're > 60+ and she's < 23 then RUN...  If you're significantly younger & she's 33+ then she might be genuine, worth taking a chance... 

 

F'me dude £920 to fly from UK (am assuming so as you quoted £GBP), you need to shop around a bit, tell us your departure airport (mine is Manchester) & rough Idea of dates and we'll see what we can find... anything for true love ????

 

 

 

even if it's a troll it quite still surprises me that he has the face to post some sh.... stuff like that

On 12/24/2019 at 6:48 PM, JFK39 said:

 

 

Thanks for advice i've already stated i wouldn't support her financially and she didn't seem to bothered about it, And yes  and thats what i mean there is good and bad in everywhere thats why i want to check before i stop replying.

they all say that in the beginning, the asking/begging starts a couple months later, money for sick brother/cousin/uncle (meaning bf), mother not feeling good.... wait and see, it all be out soon enough, maybe a couple kids..... run Forrest,  run

Errrm NO !

On 12/29/2019 at 3:35 AM, CG1 Blue said:

Ah yes, I remember now. I stay at the Bliss and walk past that area every night. Never gone in there - maybe next time! 

Don't bother - apparently the girls don't "go" with customers. ????

On 12/25/2019 at 7:42 PM, JFK39 said:

Thank you all for the help/ banter i understand how thai girls are she seemed different

Let's be clear, you're not dating a Thai girl.  You're dating a Thai bargirl.  Big difference.  You've never dated a normal Thai girl. 

My first experience of Thailand ........ Pattaya in particular was in 1964 during my military service. I can say with some certainty that the mindset here has not changed ................ girls working in bars are there for one purpose & it's a "two way arrangement". Perhaps they are looking for a farang to marry, but do not think it's for love, it's money, stopping working & not being poor. They work the bars only for money, to feed their children & family, in return they provide a service which is tailored to suit customer needs. I would say very few romances between Thai's/farang's end up as a successful partnership, mainly because there are so many "hanger's on" pressurizing her from immediate family for cash, which she will move heaven & earth to support their demands. Sadly, the farangs seems to always end up with the "<deleted>ty end" of the stick here & if he fails to provide a comfortable living you will be cast aside & she will move on! ....... fact. 

Most bar girls are real professionals & newbie's ( farangs just experiencing Thailand) must be very aware that your wealth will be sort after with vigor & given the chance "will bleed you dry"...... another fact.

 

Golden rule ............. commit only when you've been together for two/three years, by then all the skeletons should have come out of the cupboard & you'll know how many brothers, sisters, aunts & uncles she has besides mum & dad. Also, don't be surprised if she has a "gik" (a guy on the side, usually a Thai) along the way ....... it's very common here when girls have farang partners.

 

Lastly, my experience of bargirls is trust only 1% of what they say & do. The best way forward is to "pay as you go" as a newbie. That means short times/long times & no longer than 3 days. Don't mess up your holiday by falling for a beautiful girl immediately you arrive as you'll end up waiting, spending money & doing things that you never ever planned ...... these "cuties" are everywhere. Do not show your money, tipping is fine, but don't over do it ...... you'll realize if you are being too generous once you review the night before! Just don't be an idiot & give too much of your money away to someone you've only just met! Who would do that?........ people on holiday here seem to leave their "noddle' at the airport. Enjoy your trip & take care of number one ................. girls here will take great care of you, but don't forget it's all business with them & money to them is number one not you!

 

Remember you are in control ...... not them! Enjoy every minute .......... & good luck.

10 hours ago, patongphil said:

Don't bother - apparently the girls don't "go" with customers. ????

I was just hoping to improve my Connect 4 game ????