Help me figure out my life with my thai GF.

[torturedsole]

11 minutes ago, male expat said:

By the way I'm here for more than 20 years with ONE great spouse, but I am financially very healty and I am one in a hundred.

Where is here for 20 years?

[Salerno]

Zimbabwe 

[BritTim]

I know you are primarily interested in visa questions, but will take the liberty of exploring other issues.

 

Ignore those who think your GF is a gold digger. It could be true, but probably is not.

 

What do you know about your GF's previous relationships? Those can give you a better insight into her character and desires than all your online chats. What are her close family like? Especially when you are in Thailand, that can have a huge impact on how smooth your relationship will be.

 

Has your GF ever been outside Thailand? While a significant investment, I would try to bring her to Spain for a month to visit, both to see how she adapts to the country (albeit with a language barrier) and how she interacts with your friends and family.

 

If you can make money purely as a digital nomad, with no Thai client or employer, then as a practical matter you can do it without a work permit. It is not strictly legal, but it is tolerated. Working as a language teacher in Thailand without a work permit, however, would be extremely risky. It is not a grey area, and is not tolerated if the authorities become aware of what you are doing.

 

One way to leverage your language skills (Spanish native speaker and excellent English) could be working for an import export business. You would need basic Thai, but not necessarily complete fluency. The salary would not be great, but possibly just about enough to get by.

 

In the past, and possibly in the future, if married, you could get a multiple entry Non Immigrant visa based on marriage without financial proof from some Thai consulates. This means a trip to an overseas consulate in a nearby country about every 15 months or so and brief border bounces every 90 days. With a limited income, that is likely your best bet if married and on limited income.

 

Do not rush into anything.

[HauptmannUK]

Thailand is no country for young men. Its fine for older guys like me who are retired after a career in the West and have money in the bank and a solid pension income.

At 26 years old you don't want to be living on the breadline in Bangkok. You should be building a life for yourself in Europe. If you have any future with this girl it will be in Spain.  Get her a Schengen visa and have her come visit you for a holiday to see how she likes it.

[tonray]

6 hours ago, espanolentailandia said:

nd seeing in each other at least once a year

I don't need to read any further

[thaibeachlovers]

I've read a very similar OP from another newbie.

Here we go again!

[Bruce Aussie Chiang Mai]

Good luck to you, if you feel you love her and she same with you just go for it.

I personally wouldn't seek advice here for anything to do with life or relationship.

Want to know about Visa procedures or problems you in right place.

Not all Thai girls are gold diggers, there are many people here just think of them as meat.

I been married 3 times twice to Australian and now 9 years to my Thai wife. Wish I met her when I was your age.

Good Thai ladies are here in the quanity. I have about 20 good friends married to Thais and everyone them are over the moon happy.

I would suggest not seeking advice or relationships from the bar. It's your relationship you got a brain and a heart spend time together and see how it goes.

Best of luck.

????❤????????

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

[1FinickyOne]

8 hours ago, espanolentailandia said:

So then i read about marriage visa

you might want to check the age requirements... and your financial situation is not too strong to give up any job or income you have elsewhere... 

 

if you don't like it here in the first place, then, I would not recommend your moving here... it sounds like it will be a tough bumpy road... 

 

good luck to you. 

[PatOngo]

8 hours ago, espanolentailandia said:

I have around 15.000€ saved but that's all I have.

That should keep her interested for a few months!

[lapamita]

11 hours ago, kingofthemountain said:

You have answered yourself to your question

live in Thailand is really not a good idea for you

and she is right, the quality of life is higher in Europe

You ever see the dark side of Europe ,the quality is higher not everywhere and in some part of Spain in the countryside ist like NoGo. very poor areas and boring. The girl will even not be happy if living in this area and this conservative guys even not telling their families or friends about girl. tell everything . I think if the girl know the reality the even not want to go i don't mean Thailand is better,  Thailand is not good idea for living.. the better idea for her ist find North European Men States from Switzerland Norway.  guy try to find the South American girl she speak already  Spanish  and more on reality better for living together... with a thai in Spain will be so difficult

Edited June 2, 2020 by lapamita

[mike787]

She, family, and her thai boyfriend will strip you of time, money, everything else.

[giddyup]

1 minute ago, mike787 said:

She, family, and her thai boyfriend will strip you of time, money, everything else.

It's possible but not a given.

[khunpa]

Lived abroad most of my life and been happily married to a Thai-woman for over 10 years now. Everything in life is a challenge and requires taking a risk. If you really like the girl and feel that you will regret it later in life, then go for it. Worst case, you go back home and have at least tried it.Personally, I would not start out by marrying a girl I hardly know. Why not just come here and then see what happens?

 

PS. Don't listen to all the guys saying the girl will just take your money. I have known many different types of Thai-women and think many would be great partners, IF treated well and with respect. Often the guys who burn their fingers here, have treated their Thai-partner bad and therefore ended up with problems. 

 

 

[steven100]

marry ...

buy the 2 baht necklace ...

fix the sick buffalo ...

build the house ... 

buy the car ... 

rinse & repeat 

[BritManToo]

19 hours ago, espanolentailandia said:

I am 26 years old but i don't really thing age matters.

Doesn't Spain have women?

[misterjames]

3 minutes ago, khunpa said:

PS. Don't listen to all the guys saying the girl will just take your money. I have known many different types of Thai-women and think many would be great partners, IF treated well and with respect. Often the guys who burn their fingers here, have treated their Thai-partner bad and therefore ended up with problems. 

 

 

Translation = The key word is that he's been married for 10 years which means he's payed for it one way or another sin sod etc.

 

People that post stuff like this truly don't understand Thai women yet and are usually the guys that have already been rinsed for sin sod building houses etc and have never tested how their teerak would react if the good things stopped flowing from the relationship .

 

Walk around some malls in the north east and you will bump into these guys wondering aimlessly after they have built houses and been kicked out and even banned from their villages by the local cops by their teeraks after 15-20 years for doing absolutely nothing wrong when teerak finally decides to cash in.

 

You can also find loads of guys in the west that have been rinsed for their houses possessions etc etc by Thai women they have married and brought to the west.

 

One guy I know not old good guy good job etc married and kids brought her to his home country within months she had found a new guy via tinder and moved in with him filed for divorce and taken his kids he now lives in a mobile home while his wife rogers the guy she met on tinder in his house.

Guys like that believe they are special don't listen to the warnings then find out the hard way that our version of love and theirs will never be the same and it almost always involves scamming your money sooner or later.

 

 

 

[Lacessit]

15 minutes ago, BritManToo said:

Doesn't Spain have women?

I've heard they grow mustaches quite quickly after 30.

[Lacessit]

OP, permit me to doubt there is much demand for learning Spanish by Thais. English yes.

At your age, you are better off staying where you are, and building your assets. Getting married is the absolute worst financial decision you can make. Better you come to Thailand for a couple of weeks each year, f##k your brains out, then go back to earn real money.

Your loving GF probably has a few other suitors on the go, so there's no need to feel guilty about stringing her along, because the odds are good she is doing the same.

Bear in mind with Thais all farangs are ATM's, and support is expected.

[ChaiyaTH]

Stay away now you still have a chance, even if you would still want to come, you have to be prepared with income and fat savings.
Besides it is just a stupid choice, you can speak Spanish and have Latin America laying on your feet. Enough cute girls there and more chances long term.

Edited June 2, 2020 by ChaiyaTH

[kingofthemountain]

48 minutes ago, ChaiyaTH said:

Besides it is just a stupid choice, you can speak Spanish and have Latin America laying on your feet. Enough cute girls there and more chances long term

You are right, a girl from latin america should be a better choice for him

however afaik they are more picky than the thai girls for the choice, i mean if

someone is ugly it should be difficult for him to find a cute latina girl, even if he is wealthy.

 

On the other hand, this problem is not existent with the thai girls.

If they have a financial tribute, they don't care at all if the guy is an

old fart bald fat and tattooed, a smoker, a drinker, and so on.

 

It was just my personal observation of the 2 groups, nothing scientific and of course as usual still few exceptions 

Edited June 2, 2020 by kingofthemountain

[bodga]

1 hour ago, BritManToo said:

Doesn't Spain have women?

Uhuh mmmmmmmm Penelope????

 

Edited June 2, 2020 by bodga

[bodga]

1 hour ago, Lacessit said:

I've heard they grow mustaches quite quickly after 30.

Nothing 230v cant fix, some of  those  Issan beauties have quite the mustache  also, Wife used to have quite a goodun, didnt  bother me, like  shaggin a werewolf, but she lasered it  years  ago

[Lacessit]

8 hours ago, bodga said:

Nothing 230v cant fix, some of  those  Issan beauties have quite the mustache  also, Wife used to have quite a goodun, didnt  bother me, like  shaggin a werewolf, but she lasered it  years  ago

Thank you for that mental image, I need a good nightmare.

[BritTim]

11 hours ago, misterjames said:

Translation = The key word is that he's been married for 10 years which means he's payed for it one way or another sin sod etc.

 

People that post stuff like this truly don't understand Thai women yet and are usually the guys that have already been rinsed for sin sod building houses etc and have never tested how their teerak would react if the good things stopped flowing from the relationship .

 

Walk around some malls in the north east and you will bump into these guys wondering aimlessly after they have built houses and been kicked out and even banned from their villages by the local cops by their teeraks after 15-20 years for doing absolutely nothing wrong when teerak finally decides to cash in.

 

You can also find loads of guys in the west that have been rinsed for their houses possessions etc etc by Thai women they have married and brought to the west.

 

One guy I know not old good guy good job etc married and kids brought her to his home country within months she had found a new guy via tinder and moved in with him filed for divorce and taken his kids he now lives in a mobile home while his wife rogers the guy she met on tinder in his house.

Guys like that believe they are special don't listen to the warnings then find out the hard way that our version of love and theirs will never be the same and it almost always involves scamming your money sooner or later.

There are, indeed, horror stories. However, I can cite friends with very little money who have found extremely loyal Thai wives who have handed over their life savings as their contribution to the family finances. Even where marriages end after 10, 15 or 20 years, this is often nothing to do with money, but simply (as often in relationships in the West) a matter of two people gradually drifting apart, and no longer wanting to be tied to each other. The separation comes as often from the male partner as from the female partner.

[PatchinExPat]

13 hours ago, misterjames said:

Translation = The key word is that he's been married for 10 years which means he's payed for it one way or another sin sod etc.

You can also find loads of guys in the west that have been rinsed for their houses possessions etc etc by Thai women they have married and brought to the west.

Guys like that believe they are special don't listen to the warnings then find out the hard way that our version of love and theirs will never be the same and it almost always involves scamming your money sooner or later.

 

 

 

The plain fact is you can find women in marriages of convenience in every part of the

world. Some women have the me first attitude and never loose it. That is fine hope their

life works out for them. Their men just better be willing to let them be the leader in everything.

Yes you need to understand things about Thai culture first or you will have surprises.

 

But, there are Thai women who clearly have thought out life paths, that include finding a good 

husband, being a good wife, knowing and expressing love for him.

Being a partner in a marriage is something they have to learn, because Thai men seldom allow 

a woman to be real partner. But they can learn. The oriental idea of always putting family first

can carry over to living anywhere and be part of the way she treats the family she makes

with you.

 

You should know a lot about her background , because if she has been hurt by men often

 you just have to expect that shape her future ideas about living.

Thai women can be as good as any woman you find in any land, but different cultures 

add problems to worked out , no matter the good intentions  of people getting married.

It is also true that in all cultures divorces are hard things, but sometimes necessary.

 

If you are capable of true love for another, some problems can be worked out

 But accept that the man or woman you marry at a young age will not be that

person in 40 yrs, we all change as we face life and aging.

It takes a lot of love to survive that and still be happy. 

[Kadilo]

You met your girlfriend 2 years ago and have met up at least once a year and now you are planning your future. 
 

I don’t need to read anymore. 
 

There’s always Juan. 

[Dumbastheycome]

If  you come to TVF for  an answer to this you are doomed to be  confused and  disappointed !

[BritManToo]

7 hours ago, BritTim said:

The separation comes as often from the male partner as from the female partner.

Not true, it's almost always the woman.

She either leaves herself, or makes life so unbearable the man is forced to go.

[BritManToo]

4 hours ago, PatchinExPat said:

But, there are Thai women who clearly have thought out life paths, that include finding a good 

husband, being a good wife, knowing and expressing love for him.

I thought in another post you were leaving 'cos your wife didn't do any of that?

Great to hear from the 'There are good Thai women out there but I didn't find one' posters.

Always the optimist! 

 

But the ugly truth is there aren't any good women, they're rubbish at relationships, best to just stop blaming yourself, accept reality, and settle for what you can get at a price you can afford.

Edited June 3, 2020 by BritManToo

[Kadilo]

17 minutes ago, BritManToo said:

, accept reality, and settle for what you can get at a price you can afford.

It was the same with my first car.