Clapping shoulders

[StreetCowboy]

This evening again the boss at our local put his arm around my shoulders to welcome me to his pub (although I was there before he was) and shook my hand.

I am not keen on acquaintances putting their arms around my shoulders.

If you clap me on the near shoulder, I will resent that.  If you put your arm around me, and clap me on the far shoulder, so far, I don't recall ever getting violent.

 

What is your view on uninvited physical contact?

 

[CharlieH]

Depends on how well or how long you have known them.

NEW, back off !

Old friend, no problem

Someone you havnt seen in awhile, no problem.

 

Personally I dont ddo it at all, unless its a female.????

 

[talahtnut]

I don't think that was a queer thing to do,  was it?

[StreetCowboy]

Just now, talahtnut said:

I don't think that was a queer thing to do,  was it?

It's not unusual, as Tom Jones might say.

[1FinickyOne]

I was out looking at homes with a real estate agent - 

 

The home owner was mowing his lawn and stopped when I arrived. He was literally dripping sweat... and then offered to shake my hand.. it was totally disgusting. 

 

Now, I just step back and wai everyone... 

[talahtnut]

1 minute ago, StreetCowboy said:

It's not unusual, as Tom Jones might say.

I remember a young lady touched my leg in 1972,

, Tom Jones is wrong.

[TimBKK]

“What is your view on uninvited physical contact?”

Wouldn’t bother me at all.  Acts of friendship that come from a good place are more than welcome.  Suggest you light up, no offense intended.

[connda]

If I see ya, I'll give you a hug.
You don't grasp the proclivities of different cultures. 

"Don't Touch Me." 
Urban Upper Middle Class Yank.

Edited January 15, 2022 by connda

[pgrahmm]

Typically for me that could happen within a "broad" inner circle (sports competition their wives would too).... Competing over the years kind of earned that comraderie....

In the OP's example it would be an unwanted & unwelcome gesture beyond a handshake.... Especially in a bar/tavern/restaurant scene....

 

That's before the Covid pandemic changed all the rules.....

[The Hammer2021]

Unacceptable especially in these covid times

[StreetCowboy]

10 hours ago, TimBKK said:

“What is your view on uninvited physical contact?”

Wouldn’t bother me at all.  Acts of friendship that come from a good place are more than welcome.  Suggest you light up, no offense intended.

It's a no-smoking pub

[ColeBOzbourne]

12 hours ago, TimBKK said:

Wouldn’t bother me at all.  Acts of friendship that come from a good place are more than welcome.  Suggest you light up, no offense intended.

Everyone has a different level of comfort regarding personal space. You should respect that. Close-talkers and touchy-feely people have no concept of respect for others.

[ColeBOzbourne]

Close Encounters:

My own father was a shoulder clapper, and a hand holder. When he shook anyone's hand, male or female, he did not let go for the rest of the conversation, and he placed his other arm around their shoulder the entire time. He was just being friendly. But I felt uncomfortable as I could see the other person squirming to get away and he was oblivious. I hate it when people do that to me.

 

I asked a close-talker once why she does that. Her face was always about four inches from the other person. Her first response was to ask if it was a problem because her breath stunk. I said no, I just don't like it, and you're so close my eyes cannot focus on you. She  explained that she really loves to be close enough to see details in the other person's face, individual eyelashes, pores in the skin, feel the other person's breath on her face and inhale their breath. Sounded pretty freaky to me. That's the last thing I want.

[userabcd]

just politely ask him not to do it.

[thaibeachlovers]

On 1/16/2022 at 2:29 AM, StreetCowboy said:

I am not keen on acquaintances putting their arms around my shoulders.

One might be so bold as to suggest you change your local. His pub his rules.

[BritManToo]

On 1/15/2022 at 8:29 PM, StreetCowboy said:

What is your view on uninvited physical contact?

Call the police and have the establishment closed for breaking social distancing rules.

[bbko]

On 1/15/2022 at 9:35 PM, connda said:

"Don't Touch Me." 
Urban Upper Middle Class Yank.

I'm from the US and agree with you, many of my fellow country men get bothered if touched, even if in a friendly way.