15-year-old Thai schoolgirl who committed suicide was bullied at school

[snoop1130]

 

Being bullied by friends at school appears to have led to the recent suicide of a 15-year girl in Ban Tha Liab of Tha Kradan sub-district in Sanam Chai Khet district of Chachoengsao Province, according to the Facebook page of Teenee Paed Riew.

 

The girl committed suicide by hanging herself in a house in her village, leaving behind a hand-written suicide note lamenting her bullying by friends at school.

 

The letter reads “I do not want to blame anyone but myself, who was the problem. Then I created this last problem…there were problems at school, in that I was bullied, was insulted about my appearance. I tried to bear it alone without telling anybody. I suffer from depression, which is very tormenting, and I am sorry for having to do this – to leave this world.”

 

Full Story: https://www.thaipbsworld.com/15-year-old-thai-schoolgirl-who-committed-suicide-was-bullied-at-school/

 

-- © Copyright Thai PBS 2023-01-23

 

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[Kwasaki]

Well done teachers, good job done. 

[Stocky]

30 minutes ago, snoop1130 said:

I tried to bear it alone without telling anybody.

That is so sad.

[Denim]

Pity she didn't name the bullies although they themselves will know who they are and will be in denial.

 

Very sad.

 

In this Tik Tok world , at that age , young people are often very sensitive to criticism. 

[Kwasaki]

She was keeping from her parents by the sounds of it to, so sad but it can happen. 

[nikmar]

Heartbreaking. I hope she has found peace.

[ubonr1971]

RIP. Should have named them

[Kwasaki]

3 minutes ago, ubonr1971 said:

RIP. Should have named them

Maybe the good friend who was mentioned will. 

[JeffersLos]

1 hour ago, Denim said:

In this Tik Tok world , at that age , young people are often very sensitive to criticism. 

You've never pointed out that a Thai Visa poster is wrong.

[BananaStrong]

2 hours ago, Kwasaki said:

Well done teachers, good job done. 

When I was a teacher, I would see one of my 1,000 (ONE THOUSAND) students about 40 minutes a WEEK.   Of course, I would only interact with them brieflly.

 

As a PARENT, I have to imagine that number is higher.

 

Good friends, loving parents, a passion.....................all things likely more powerful than a teacher you barely see.

 

I'm not saying don't give the teacher some blame, but I'd need to know some more information.  

 

Not all kids are bullied right in front of a teacher.

[2009]

Tragic.

[hotchilli]

12 hours ago, snoop1130 said:

The letter reads “I do not want to blame anyone but myself, who was the problem. Then I created this last problem…there were problems at school, in that I was bullied, was insulted about my appearance. I tried to bear it alone without telling anybody. I suffer from depression, which is very tormenting, and I am sorry for having to do this – to leave this world.”

Such a state to find oneself, being bullied is no-joke.

I hope every person in that school who tormented this poor girl looks inwards and shares the same grief that they gave her.

[CrunchWrapSupreme]

13 hours ago, Kwasaki said:

Well done teachers, good job done. 

Yes, unfortunately, I've seen this happen too many times. A group of students in a class, usually girls, start having a beef with each other over something. The homeroom teacher hears of it and calls them all into the office. They all sit on the floor around her desk as she grills them, interrogation style, to get to the bottom of it.

 

With the grasp of Thai I have I can tell a bit of what's going on. It's absurd. They're really out to solve nothing, they merely enjoy stoking the flames. They're hoping to catch them in some sort of lie or cover up, making some students look bad in front of the others. As soon as the students leave, the teachers all giggle and gossip about what just happened. They then look forward to the next episode of this TV drama they created next week.

[ChrisKC]

Not much in the way of a support system at home or at school that doesn't seem to notice such a depressed daughter or a student and try to address that in some way. 

 

RIP that poor girl. 

[jcmj]

And this is why the government should spend a lot more money on resources addressing mental health education, hotlines and Support services. Very sad. RIP 

[Thingamabob]

Such a sad story. A young lady who suffered in silence until she could no longer endure the cruel bullying to which she was subjected. I hope those who taunted her will be called to account, and I pray that she is now resting in peace.

[Bangkok Barry]

13 hours ago, Denim said:

In this Tik Tok world , at that age , young people are often very sensitive to criticism. 

No-one forces them to use it. The problem is that people inherently hate people, right from the time they begin school or even earlier. Bullying takes place in every school. Where does that come from? I doubt it has been learned from anywhere at that age. It's something humans are born with. Nearly every social media post draws abuse. Another example of people hating people is that they resent others sitting next to them on a bus or train or plane. Or people seek quiet and solitude, away from others.

Facebook and Twitter are rife with hate comments. We usually only hear about it when the 'victim' is a celebrity. What I don't understand is why these public figures put out a name that everyone knows, instead of making up an obscure one to give to only their trusted friends and family. Making yourself available to public comments is just asking for abuse and threats. It's what people do.

[rankric]

22 minutes ago, Bangkok Barry said:

No-one forces them to use it. The problem is that people inherently hate people, right from the time they begin school or even earlier. Bullying takes place in every school. Where does that come from? I doubt it has been learned from anywhere at that age. It's something humans are born with. Nearly every social media post draws abuse. Another example of people hating people is that they resent others sitting next to them on a bus or train or plane. Or people seek quiet and solitude, away from others.

Facebook and Twitter are rife with hate comments. We usually only hear about it when the 'victim' is a celebrity. What I don't understand is why these public figures put out a name that everyone knows, instead of making up an obscure one to give to only their trusted friends and family. Making yourself available to public comments is just asking for abuse and threats. It's what people do.

Pretty deep thinking that. Interesting "where does it come from"

 

But seriously its got naff all to do with social media. Kids getting bullied is as old as time. 

 

I do wonder where stuff comes from, 6 year old telling me his friends got loads of money as he wears an adidas coat. Disturbed a 6 year old is talking like this. 

[rankric]

Sorry, tragic, seems weird though not a lot of this type of news here. 

[poyai111]

13 hours ago, Kwasaki said:

She was keeping from her parents by the sounds of it to, so sad but it can happen. 

"Lean on me" - at that age adolescents have to cope with a multitude of conflicting issues. Those closest to them must show empathy and support, indicate a willingness to provide advice, to be a confidant during this time when self esteem is at its lowest. Show leadership teachers and own your responsibility parents

[JonnyF]

Terribly sad. I can't imagine how the parents must feel. ????

 

My niece was also bullied relentlessly at school (mainly via phone apps) but fortunately she wrote a letter to my sister and brother in law telling them what was happening before she attempted anything like this. They moved her to different school where she did very well but now aged 21 she still has a few issues stemming from that period. 

[DrMJA]

Rest In Peace, Dear Child.  

[Aussieroaming]

RIP and to the bullies, the weight of her death is on your shoulders.

[nahkit]

15 hours ago, snoop1130 said:

bullying by friends at school.

Not sure "friends" is the word I would use.

[robblok]

2 hours ago, Bangkok Barry said:

No-one forces them to use it. The problem is that people inherently hate people, right from the time they begin school or even earlier. Bullying takes place in every school. Where does that come from? I doubt it has been learned from anywhere at that age. It's something humans are born with. Nearly every social media post draws abuse. Another example of people hating people is that they resent others sitting next to them on a bus or train or plane. Or people seek quiet and solitude, away from others.

Facebook and Twitter are rife with hate comments. We usually only hear about it when the 'victim' is a celebrity. What I don't understand is why these public figures put out a name that everyone knows, instead of making up an obscure one to give to only their trusted friends and family. Making yourself available to public comments is just asking for abuse and threats. It's what people do.

I was bullied a bit at school as I was a lot smarter and got good grades. Seems that makes someone a target. The moment your different your a target. I did not really care because I could physically beat them if needed (and i did in one point attacking the ringleader and beating him up). But not everyone is like me. I am a loner by nature so I dont mind not being in the "in" crowd. 

 

But really bullying can come from anything, looks, who your parents are , if you come from an other city, new in a class ect. Not everyone is like me a loner so many of those that are bullied hurt a lot as being excluded is something most people hate. It was not a problem for me. Plus the bullying was just in one school as i got higher and people got more serious about their education good grades were no longer a reason for bullying. I was still a loner (by choice)

[Tropposurfer]

13 hours ago, BananaStrong said:

When I was a teacher, I would see one of my 1,000 (ONE THOUSAND) students about 40 minutes a WEEK.   Of course, I would only interact with them briefly.

 

As a PARENT, I have to imagine that number is higher.

 

Good friends, loving parents, a passion.....................all things likely more powerful than a teacher you barely see.

 

I'm not saying don't give the teacher some blame, but I'd need to know some more information.  

 

Not all kids are bullied right in front of a teacher.

Bullies are always cowards, and always calculate if they can succeed and stand-over the bullied.

Bullying is a toxic-shame-based behaviour and as such is very cunning in its functioning ... how it hides itself due to its foundational positioning in our psyche.

Teachers can see it sometimes, but usually being-shame based the bullying is disguised in front of others that may intervene and shown in semi-benign ways like mild name calling or laughing at another as common examples.

Often this 'socialised, normalised' shaming or others is endemic in societies (we actually all do it, some do it a lot, and its widespread) and thus can be missed and dismissed as being benign.

However when its 'safe' to bully then other malicious cruel shaming and other forms of abuse are meted out. This makes the 'lighter' forms of taunting having huge impacts on the bullied.

In my psych work of many decades it was nearly always the teaching of the family that creates an individual who is 'thick-skinned' impervious to those who test whether a person is a possible target for bullying.

 

Bullies have been bullied, or cowered by more powerful people in the lives - always, even though they may appear to be really tough kids and as though they are really 'hard-arsed'.

When kids bully its easy to look  into and see those who train them ... abuse them into being bullies as they are still in the family system.

Some kids and then adults later (Trump is a perfect example) seem to be just sociopathic and enjoy hurting others from infancy.

 

Strong self esteeming by family of the child does not set up in them a 'receptacle' for others to dump in.

Im also believe from my work that family systems hand down such this 'setting-up' (usually without knowing it), and that some family systems need victims and scapegoats in order to maintain a sense of balance (albeit a tilted skewed balance). 

This is much more common than we feel comfortable to admit.

The wider social circle of course has influence in the developing person in both affirming and dis-affirming ways. But, Freud was spot-on when he said; 'The first two years of life make the person.' (paraphrase).

 

The recent rises in 'othering' in the kaleidoscope of the extreme right worldwide is an example of bullying on a meta-scale. 

 

The tragic, lonely death of this young girl should give us all pause to give no space for bullying in our own homes, family systems - small or meta, or in our society.

When you see abuse of any kind stop it! 

How do we combat bullying?

Build a balanced sense of self in our children i..e give them the gift of knowing they are valuable and loved unconditionally, know you are human and make mistakes, and that mistakes are okay, that its okay to be know you aren't and seen as not perfect, know that you are beautifully unique yet paradoxically the same as others.

Do not shame others - especially children - create boundaries outside of and inside your kids, direct, challenge, and even admonish yes but shame NO.

Showing is far more important than telling children about life. Never do the; 'Do as I say not as I do stuff' - poison! e.g when you screw up admit it and apologise e.g. 'I am sorry I snapped at you before son/daughter I was angry about something that was none of your creation or concern and I was wrong to give that to you in a mean way. I love you'. Show honour, kindness, compassion, loving but clear boundaries and respect to your wife and others.

 

Find out how shame works in your parents family and exercise your healthy sense of shame all the time with your family ????????

Find out the mechanisms of bullying e.g. taunting, mocking, ostracising, criticising, insulting, gossiping - with specific person focus - ongoing, etc.

Develop a relationship of openness with your kids and family so that you practice and exhibit this openness to talk and to listen to others, especially to and in your kids.

Ask them directly about their feelings and about things liked bullying.  good way to 'lay ground' for this is to make space and time to be together and enjoy each other and whatever you're doing.

Feel and be open to being open and take the risk of being the parent and taking a lead to share about something. A good place to start is with something that you experienced as a child that has touched you in life with the family recently and share this with your kids (not to make them parent you though!).

Having the talks about the other sex when they are moving through this crazy part of maturing.

 

Being available, and others knowing you are available and safe is really powerful in supporting through bullying or anything else that comes in life.

 

RIP dear child ????????????

[Tropposurfer]

29 minutes ago, robblok said:

I was bullied a bit at school as I was a lot smarter and got good grades. Seems that makes someone a target. The moment your different your a target. I did not really care because I could physically beat them if needed (and i did in one point attacking the ringleader and beating him up). But not everyone is like me. I am a loner by nature so I dont mind not being in the "in" crowd. 

 

But really bullying can come from anything, looks, who your parents are , if you come from an other city, new in a class ect. Not everyone is like me a loner so many of those that are bullied hurt a lot as being excluded is something most people hate. It was not a problem for me. Plus the bullying was just in one school as i got higher and people got more serious about their education good grades were no longer a reason for bullying. I was still a loner (by choice)

So sorry to hear of your abuse. Glad you kept on living, pushing through and living your life. Big hug mate ????

[Purdey]

While everyone is blaming teachers i have to wonder why the parents never saw something was wrong and ask questions. While it is hard to confide in some parents, parents do love their kids. I assume the parents are asking themselves what they did wrong. 

[Bangkok Barry]

35 minutes ago, robblok said:

I was bullied a bit at school as I was a lot smarter and got good grades. Seems that makes someone a target. The moment your different your a target. I did not really care because I could physically beat them if needed (and i did in one point attacking the ringleader and beating him up). But not everyone is like me. I am a loner by nature so I dont mind not being in the "in" crowd. 

 

But really bullying can come from anything, looks, who your parents are , if you come from an other city, new in a class ect. Not everyone is like me a loner so many of those that are bullied hurt a lot as being excluded is something most people hate. It was not a problem for me. Plus the bullying was just in one school as i got higher and people got more serious about their education good grades were no longer a reason for bullying. I was still a loner (by choice)

As I said, bullying is universal. And any excuse is used to generate hate and violence between people. We're a strange species.

[Grusa]

1 hour ago, Aussieroaming said:

RIP and to the bullies, the weight of her death is on your shoulders.

I rather suspect that the bullies are very proud of themselves, boasting, and feeling even more empowered by their success.

 

That is the nature of a bully.